Note to Clients: Vulgarity.

[manTOman]

The law is a very complicated service business, often with strict requirements. Comparing the needs of a customer with a specific legal issue to the needs of a customer seeking escort services is silly.

 

I know there are different types of law. But a divorce lawyer doesn't take on every divorce case that comes his/her way. There are a lot of different factors to choosing one's representation, and in that regard I compare it to any other service industry. There's a knowledge and qualification factor, there's a price factor, but there's also a human factor. Who you click with, do you trust them, do you like them. You might like an escort or a lawyer, or a doctor or a hairdresser or a waiter for completely different reasons, but you do like them on some level or you wouldn't do repeat business with them. At least hat's how I function. I don't know what's silly about that.

[manTOman]

The law is a very complicated service business, often with strict requirements. Comparing the needs of a customer with a specific legal issue to the needs of a customer seeking escort services is silly.

 

I know there are different types of law. But a divorce lawyer doesn't take on every divorce case that comes his/her way. There are a lot of different factors to choosing one's representation, and in that regard I compare it to any other service industry. There's a knowledge and qualification factor, there's a price factor, but there's also a human factor. Who you click with, do you trust them, do you like them. You might like an escort or a lawyer, or a doctor or a hairdresser or a waiter for completely different reasons, but you do like them on some level or you wouldn't do repeat business with them. At least hat's how I function. I don't know what's silly about that.

[hypothetically]

Problem, as always, is the clients who need these lectures aren't on these forums. Clients here mostly have it together.

 

Out of the 2,000 members that joined in the last thirty days and the 7,000+ members that exist on this forum (whether active participants or casual spectators), I fail to believe “most” have it together. If the replies on a daily are any indication of the climate of how the average client views an escort, less than half of the forum’s population “have it together” and I assure you... more people need this lecture than you think.

[hypothetically]

Problem, as always, is the clients who need these lectures aren't on these forums. Clients here mostly have it together.

 

Out of the 2,000 members that joined in the last thirty days and the 7,000+ members that exist on this forum (whether active participants or casual spectators), I fail to believe “most” have it together. If the replies on a daily are any indication of the climate of how the average client views an escort, less than half of the forum’s population “have it together” and I assure you... more people need this lecture than you think.

[SirBillybob]

Speaking of the restaurant service analogy, a gentlemanly client should at the very least forward you a gift card for solo (or with +1 of choice) dinner at your fave eatery prior to embarking on digital sextual foreplay.

[rogerG]

Or this forum (which has been around for more than a decade and garnered hundreds of thousands of inquiries about the intricacies of the business) wouldn’t exist, now would it?

Most of the questions that have been asked on this board have been asked and answered over and over again. New members come and go, but the questions remain the same. Gay men like to talk about sex. There's nothing complicated about it.

[Aaron_Bauder]

Most of the questions that have been asked on this board have been asked and answered over and over again. New members come and go, but the questions remain the same. Gay men like to talk about sex. There's nothing complicated about it.

 

There are GAYS here???!

 

Deleting. I'm too masc to tolerate this.

[Mocha]

Yes, but they function in two very separate ways.

 

CL was post, wait and reply. Not realtime.

 

Grindr goes (brilliantly) for the impulse user. That's what makes it so addictive to people.

 

Well see, I don’t even let people have those discussions with me. Everything is on auto until they pass the screening. If they send me dick and ass pic, my assistant will be asking all the necessary info (including the initial explicit conversation fee lol).

[Mocha]

. And unlike @Mocha I do think that parts of the industry are very similar to other service industries. Walk into any restaurant and try being verbally abusive to the staff and you will be asked to leave. Try it with a retail story and security will be escorting you outside. Even a lawyer chooses his clientele based on their case.

 

That’s not the point I was making. It deflects my agreement with @hypothetically when you add “unlike” to what I was referring to. I know escorting is similar to some businesses, but I’m also saying it differs because we deal with a different type of clientele. You just said it, it would be rude to be rude to any of those other industries. At the same time, it’s not the same because those phrases you used would be grounds for sexual harassment, arrest or a lawsuit. In our business, that’s just talk. You can’t compare apples and oranges is what I’m saying.

 

Meaning: @rogerG can’t say we are to deal with clients like any other business, because it’s not behavior like any other business. Just because we sell sex doesn’t mean we should be okay with sexual harassment. You don’t go showing your pictures of sex to your local sex store boutique clerk, do you?

[+ WilliamM]

So is escorting, apparently.

Or this forum (which has been around for more than a decade and garnered hundreds of thousands of inquiries about the intricacies of the business) wouldn’t exist, now would it?

 

This site started two decades ago. Of course, there are a constant number of new members.

[manTOman]

That’s not the point I was making. It deflects my agreement with @hypothetically when you add “unlike” to what I was referring to. I know escorting is similar to some businesses, but I’m also saying it differs because we deal with a different type of clientele. You just said it, it would be rude to be rude to any of those other industries. At the same time, it’s not the same because those phrases you used would be grounds for

 

A get your point @Mocha and I both agree and disagree with you. While the nature of the business and what happens during the appointment is very different I believe that initial contact is very similar to other industries. Not to be taken literarily of course. While to a waitress I'll talk about dressing on the side, and extra sauce, and the size of the steak, to an escort I'll talk about a size of a different meat and a different sauce altogether; however, in both I should be respectful and courteous. Sending unsolicited pics of my flooded hole to someone I've never met is arrogant and disrespectful, and that's putting it mildly. I get that because of the nature of this business, these boundaries become blurry to the point that some may even confuse it as acceptable practice but it's not. It is a business like any other, and it should be treated as such. That's at least how I look at it.

Edited August 8, 2019 by manTOman

[Mocha]

A get your point @Mocha and I both agree and disagree with you. While the nature of the business and what happens during the appointment is very different I believe that initial contact is very similar to other industries. Not to be taken literarily of course. While to a waitress I'll talk about dressing on the side, and extra sauce, and the size of the steak, to an escort I'll talk about a size of a different meat and a different sauce altogether; however, in both I should be respectful and courteous. Sending unsolicited pics of my flooded hole to someone I've never met is arrogant and disrespectful, and that's putting it mildly. I get that because of the nature of this business, these boundaries become blurry tot he point that some may even confuse it as acceptable practice but it's not. It is a business like any other, and it should be treated as such. That's at least how I look at it.

 

Makes sense, I just had to clarify. I still though, don’t like when sex is compared to food (people have likened looking for sex to pizza, McDonald’s, etc.) it’s not the same. It’ll never be the same. Also like you said, phone talk and in person talk is also not the same.

[hypothetically]

Most of the questions that have been asked on this board have been asked and answered over and over again. New members come and go, but the questions remain the same. Gay men like to talk about sex. There's nothing complicated about it.

 

You’re missing the point. But I gave you a thumbs up so you feel like you actually did something today. Go you.

[+ oldNbusted]

compared to food

 

I'll just pipe up to say that I view both as experiences, and I prefer ones created just for me, by people with talent. Maybe another way of looking at it.

[Mocha]

I think that although vulgarity is deplorable in contacting a provider, it can stem from over enthusiasm from a client who maybe cannot hire very often & becomes a little too excited by the thought of an appointment with a hot guy.

 

I have a regular client I see about once every year or so. He does exactly that. Talks super vulgar and about the fantasy. However, on our 1st meet...he was like the most polite ever, never mentioned anything.

 

I play along with it because he always hires me for overnights, and I don’t mind a little building here and there. It’s kinda sexy, and kinda annoying. Only thing, our appointment could be weeks and months away...

 

I will say 1 thing though: before Grindr, before gay.com, and even before Adam...there was megaphone and megamates phone chat. I would actually phone sex with guys long before I met. Some guys, I never ended up meeting. Other guys I carried on relationships where we could only meet once in awhile, but phone sex kept us going.

 

So I get it...it’s not to be annoying, but a way of courting. The issue is, texting/email has made it so much more impersonal, especially if it’s not invited.

 

 

I'll just pipe up to say that I view both as experiences, and I prefer ones created just for me, by people with talent. Maybe another way of looking at it.

 

I’m perfectly fine with being compared to Oceanaire, Ruth Chris, and J Alexander. By all means lol.

Edited August 8, 2019 by Mocha

[rvwnsd]

This site started two decades ago. Of course, there are a constant number of new members.

Not to mention a constant number of old members with new identities.

[Mocha]

Not to mention a constant number of old members with new identities.

 

I just noticed you joined in 2006! I’m closing in on 10 years next year...trying sooo hard not to get voted off ?

 

[rogerG]

@rogerG can’t say we are to deal with clients like any other business

I'm not telling anyone how to run his business. I have no skin in anyone's losing game. I'm old and experienced enough to know a poor business practice when I see one, and I'm happy to share the things I won't waste my money on.

 

it’s not behavior like any other business

I disagree. The massage business is very much like escorting. High-end beauty salon work, too. In fact, some horny hairdressers escort on the side to make extra money. It's common for a service in these fields to run 60 minutes. Some of the work is done in private behind closed doors. Clothing is often removed. Touching and skin on skin contact is part of the service. Sex is not usually tolerated in a licensed facility, but workers are human and often very attractive. Stuff happens.

You’re missing the point.

I'm sure it makes you feel smarter to believe that.

[+ ArVaGuy]

The bottom line is that sexually frustrated, horny, human beings , especially the males, will exhibit extreme and absurdly disgusting behavior to get laid. I’ve received some uh, unique, images from guys via social platforms that are immediate turn offs. These people are so consumed by the desire for sexual release that common sense and decency never factor into their actions. They will exhibit this behavior not just to escorts but to anyone and everyone in the desperate hope it gets them laid.

 

It’s primal, like the mating rituals of birds displaying their plumage to attract a female mate. Only in our case it’s likely a middle-aged, overweight, male displaying his asshole with loads of semen oozing out thinking such an image is going to get him fucked. And eventually it will....hope and desperation spring eternal.

[+ BuzzBuddy]

Sadly, many unacceptable social expressions are learned over time. And these exhibitors may receive little to any constructive feedback to help them change course. As a client, I made a concerted effort to come to this source and to ask the "dumb" questions regarding what is appropriate or inappropriate. Your "positive" feedback has helped me adjust my perspective, and it has given me knowledge which I now share with other peer clients. The genesis of this thread will be my next sharing of wisdom. Thank you all for providing such a welcome venue.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Not to mention a constant number of old members with new identities.

 

Old troll, new name, who dis?

[rvwnsd]

Old troll, new name, who dis?

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXkzl2I5CH8:13

[+ Tarte Gogo]

Just one thought: I don’t think you are missing out on a lot of money by rejecting vulgar clients.

In my experience people who do not understand what type of communication is appropriate are less likely to be wealthy that those who do.

[Mocha]

Just one thought: I don’t think you are missing out on a lot of money by rejecting vulgar clients.

In my experience people who do not understand what type of communication is appropriate are less likely to be wealthy that those who do.

 

I don’t think it’s necessarily a wealth thing. My client who owns a home in Michigan and the Florida Keys, talks vulgar leading up to our encounters. He even alludes to such jokes over dinner too, which initially annoyed me on our first overnight...but then I found it to be cute, letting people in our adjacent restaurant tables know how much “protein” Im giving him later.

Edited August 8, 2019 by Mocha

[jjkrkwood]

My personal favorite is when a male says "breed my pussy"... HUH? I just think for many., hiring an escort is akin to their being in a porn fantasy or video and they think the verbal assaults are HOT and sexy ?