Do’s and Dont’s

[+ FrankR]

A general question for the brain trust here in the lounge - a newbie on the site PM’d me and asked if there are Do’s and Dont’s when it comes to hiring. I couldn’t find a thread on that topic - can anybody recall something I may have missed.

 

The question was aimed at escorts rather than masseurs, if that helps. And he wanted to know about the end to end process (before you meet, during the meet and after the meet) to keep it professional and with safety in mind.

 

Thanks! ?

[BluDay]

I didn't find a thread on a quick search, but I can give a few pointers:

 

1. Use their preferred method of contact. If they prefer text, text them.

2. Tell them you saw their post on "RM" (I suggest initials - a lot have day jobs so it obscures a bit)

3. Say you would like to get together, and ask when plans could be made.

4. Know what you want, go for guys who like the same. If you want kissing, be sure kissing is in the profile.

5. When arranging, tell them anything special, such as "this would be my first time with an escort".

6. Be concise without being terse.

7. Follow the escorts lead if they go for longer conversation.

8. Agree to reasonable requests, say a phone call. Do not give money before. Skype if you are comfortable.

9. After making arrangements, confirm reasonably. The day before, the morning of, and an hour or so before is reasonable. I use "I look forward to visiting tomorrow/this evening/when I arrive in an hour".

10. If they confirm to you, reply as soon as you reasonably can.

11. Keep the appointment. This is important. Even if you don't go through with it, go meet him, and offer the full fee. He has invested time in this. He will understand if you get nervous.

12. Before the appointment, shower up, if you will bottom, douche. Leave off cologne.

13. If it's your first time, tell him you're nervous (if you are), ask him to take the lead.

14. Tell him what you're interested in.

15. Tell him if you like or don't like something.

16. Remember he's a person, be polite, and he's doing something very nice for you.

17. Honor his time. When it's over, it's over.

 

I always suggest going to a reviewed escort.

 

Other suggestions?

[+ azdr0710]

excellent advice from BluDay above.....

 

here's a recent thread that should be helpful.....

 

https://m4m-forum.org/threads/suggestions-advice-for-someone-whos-new-to-hiring-an-escort.145483/

[+ VictorPowers]

A good hire respects the provider. Follow this and all the Do’s and Donts sort themselves out!

[rvwnsd]

A good hire respects the provider. Follow this and all the Do’s and Donts sort themselves out!

An excellent point.

 

A corollary is "The presence of a monetary transactions does not absolve one from behaving like a gentleman."

[KeepItReal]

If @BluDay and @VictorPowers do not mind, I will supplement their thoughts:

 

1. Before you think of reaching out:

1.1. Only meet with companions that have been reviewed. Seriously - do your homework or at the very least plan to meet in a public place beforehand if you have doubts.

1.2 Do not waste a companion's time - only reach out if you are serious. Pic collectors and time wasters are rude and disrespectful. Don't do that.

 

2. When you are ready to reach out to a companion:

2.1. Use their preferred method of contact. If they prefer text, text them. Use a burner phone or the "burner" app on your mobile.

2.2. Tell them you saw their post on "RM" (I suggest initials - a lot have day jobs so it obscures a bit) "Hey, I found your profile on RM"

2.3. Say you would like to get together, be specific about city and location and ask when plans could be made. "Are you in San Fran and available this evening for an outcall?"

2.4. Know what you want, go for guys who like the same. If you want kissing, be sure kissing is in the profile. "I enjoy kissing, erotic body contact and generally a top guy"

2.5. When arranging, tell them anything special, such as "this would be my first time with an escort".

2.6. Be concise without being terse.

2.7. Follow the escorts lead if they go for longer conversation. As always, be careful what you say or agree to, remember, electronic communications can be retained and used against you. Never be explicit - the words "pay" and "sex" should never be used. "What is your rate for an hour of your time"

2.8. Agree to reasonable requests, say a phone call. Do not give money before. Skype if you are comfortable.

2.9. After making arrangements, confirm reasonably. The day before, the morning of, and an hour or so before is reasonable. I use "I look forward to visiting tomorrow/this evening/when I arrive in an hour".

2.10. If they confirm to you, reply as soon as you reasonably can.

2.11. Keep the appointment. This is important. Even if you don't go through with it, go meet him, and offer the full fee discreetly. He has invested time in this. He will understand if you get nervous.

2.12. Before the appointment, shower up, if you will bottom, douche. Leave off cologne.

2.13. If it's your first time, tell him you're nervous (if you are), ask him to take the lead.

2.14. Tell him what you're interested in (see 2.4).

 

3. When you meet with the companion:

3.1. Remember he's a person, be polite, and he's doing something very nice for you.

3.2. Honor his time. When it's over, it's over - be respectful. If you want to extend, ask if it is possible and don't be cheap; pay the rate commensurate with your meeting length.

3.3. Never be explicit about payment, consider not counting out bills or using electronic payment unless you have thought it through. Be discreet, when using cash, it is recommended that the rate agreed upon should be left in an envelope in plain sight so your companion can put thoughts of remuneration out of their mind and focus on you, you can always supplement with a tip later if you choose.

3.4. Tell him if you like or don't like something. Communicate with your companion; they will appreciate it and you will enjoy their companionship so much more.

3.5 Always send a discreet follow up text message thanking the companion after the meeting - it is polite and also builds goodwill if you want to see the companion again; like most folks they will move you to the top of the list if they enjoy spending time with you. See 3.1 above.

[MrMattBig]

Don't say weird things like "Oh wow, you poor guy. Thank you for the reply you’re working to hard!" when a provider is not necessarily available when you want them to be.

[Becket]

Don't be a jerk.

[+ keroscenefire]

I think the first time it pays to maybe do a longer session..90 minutes or two hours. I did that the first time and it helped with the nerves. We met at the hotel bar he was staying at, had a drink and conversation for a bit and then went up to his room. It's worth the extra money to make sure you have the time to feel comfortable with him. There is also a nice safety in meeting the provide in public. Then once you get used to hiring, 1 hours sessions are just fine.

[+ Axiom2001]

I think the first time it pays to maybe do a longer session..90 minutes or two hours. I did that the first time and it helped with the nerves. We met at the hotel bar he was staying at, had a drink and conversation for a bit and then went up to his room. It's worth the extra money to make sure you have the time to feel comfortable with him. There is also a nice safety in meeting the provide in public. Then once you get used to hiring, 1 hours sessions are just fine.

 

I have been hiring for quite, quite some time, almost all for an hour. Those men with whom I'd truly connected and who have provided what I've sought-- I have definitely engaged their services for more than an hour and often.

 

...don't believe in hiring for more than one hour because of the rates of today. ...don't want to waste my hard-earned money, for almost all of my contacts are "OUT" which means paying for lodging and parking and other necessities.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Find your seat.

Turn off your phone.

Clap when appropriate.

Leave when the show is over.

[mike carey]

Turn off your phone.

What? *Reaches for smelling salts.*

[+ keroscenefire]

I have been hiring for quite, quite some time, almost all for an hour. Those men with whom I'd truly connected and who have provided what I've sought-- I have definitely engaged their services for more than an hour and often.

 

...don't believe in hiring for more than one hour because of the rates of today. ...don't want to waste my hard-earned money, for almost all of my contacts are "OUT" which means paying for lodging and parking and other necessities.

 

I usually do hour sessions, but honestly do like to do longer ones on occasion so I could get a more BFE with the guy. I had a really nice evening session in London, which was great because I didn't know anyone there and got a nice time to see the city from a resident, have some hot fun from an apartment overlooking the Thames and then after even enjoy a nice sauna in his building. To me it can be worth the extra money. Almost would rather do a longer session once a month than two short sessions every paycheck.

[Epigonos]

BE NICE!!!!!

[KrisParr]

I’m sure it’s been said, many times, many ways ... both escort and client need to lay off the onions and garlic for a day or two prior to the event ... oh yeah, cigarettes and coffee if at all possible stay away ... natural yogurt, parsley, and some other simple things go a long way in assuring fresh breath. I hired a magnificent hunk who had such foul halitosis, we had to reschedule- truly awkward.

[LaffingBear]

Many good answers already...particularly those that convey "be respectful"

 

As a consumer:

• Trust that little "too-good-to-be-true" voice in your head
  
• Don't let yourself be a victim
  
• Don't let your crotch make decisions your brain will regret.
  

[+ SundayZip]

I rarely book more than an hour when its my first time with an escort. There's no guarantee there will be chemistry, even with a well reviewed escort. But I usually know within 10 minutes of meeting the escort if there's chemistry. If there is, I can ask if he's able to extend the date to two (or more) hours. I'd say that well over half the time I'll ask to extend a date. Of course, sometimes the escort can not accommodate me. If so, that's okay. I can always ask for a second date. But most of the time the escort is okay with extending our first date.