I validate your points here. Some clients have particular preferences, but most of them don’t. My suggestion: take the initiative to tell your masseur about your preferences upfront. If not in your booking process then shortly after you arrive. The pros will adjust on a dime, at least for any item over which they have control. We can’t read your mind though. Communicate. Don’t like my music? Just say so and I’ll change it!
Aside on lighting. I have two skylights in my studio. I have no option to dim the light from those during the day. I otherwise have only dim mood lighting and I turn on my dimmable recessed ceiling lights to a medium to low level before the massage to make it easy to see and move around, dress/undress and again after the client has had a chance to slowly adjust after their massage. I keep the dimmable lights off during the massage, leaving only a couple table lamps with dark color shades and mood lights. It’s particularly nice at night.
In my experience, the vast majority of clients don’t like making a lot of decisions upon arrival. When I ask too many questions, they tend to get annoyed, antsy, or indecisive. A lot of them have NO preference for any of the items I might mention. They enjoy some brief small talk to connect as they undress and then quickly want to get on the table and feel totally relaxed and ready to enjoy some good therapy. Sometimes I slow them down with a big hug first. I could ask a dozen questions like:
Which room scent do you prefer?
How much pressure?
How much light?
What music do you enjoy?
How is the volume level?
Can I adjust the headrest for you?
Would you like a bolster?
How about a pillow?
Would you like me to be more conversational, or quiet?
Do you have any injuries, sensitivities, or areas you want me to avoid?
Are you ok with your feet being massaged? What about your head? (These are the most common requests to avoid on the body)
Blah, blah, blah…but I don’t. The inquisition could go on and on. And you know what? The default preselected options I already provide for all these items works really well for 95% of everyone seeing me. They either like it as-is, or have no preference anyway. So I just saved some time and client frustration for the 95% by preselecting everything. I don’t even have to ask. The other 5% who have very particular preferences tell me at the beginning, or somewhere along the way, and I adjust. Sometimes it’s after the fact and I just shake my head and say they should have said something. Then I add it to my notes so I will have everything adjusted ahead of time for their next visit.
Much of my approach is about reading the client along the way. For example, if the client seems uncomfortable with the headrest, I will ask about it and offer to adjust. The client sniffles repeatedly, so I offer tissues which I keep close right under the table plus a small trash can. The client responds physically to my pressure in a way that prompts me to ask if the pressure is ok. The client is sensitive when I touch around his underarms or feet or whatever so I ask if he wants me to avoid it. I ask if it’s ok to touch them in an erotic way. I notice a limited range of motion when I bend the knee and ask if it’s ok to continue. I notice the client goes quiet so I stop asking him questions and chatting. The client expresses pleasure when I touch him in a certain way, or a certain area; verbally, with their breath intensity and pace, moans, and the like. Conversely the client winces or tenses up and I ask them about it to make sure they are comfortable and see what I need to change, if anything. I could go on…
Basically I read my clients to prompt my questions and maybe that leads to one or two questions rather than a dozen for every client every time before we start. It saves us both time and energy up top. I like to ask just two general questions of every client:
1) Is there anything about your body I should know before we start?
2) (about 10 mins into the session) How is everything feeling?
The rest comes up by reading the client.
Last night I made arrangements to see a provider I've met before just 7 blocks away. I'm at 16th and T NW and he was staying at 11th and U NW.
He asked: "How long will it take you to get here?"
"Whatever it takes me to get dressed and walk 7 blocks" I said to him. I got dressed in less than 2 minutes, walked out of my place and texted him: "I'm on my way at 11:02 PM.
I asked him at 11:04 PM: "What's your apartment number and the code for you to let me in?"
He replied at 11:05 PM: "Are you here?" I said "NO" and he asked "Are you on Uber?', I once again told him I was walking 7 blocks to get to him. "What's your ETA?".
I replied: "Are you high?". I had to cancelled, I can't handle this goldfish / microwave mindset they have when it comes to others. I might have overreacted but I had enough.
+ The Big Guy got a reaction from Lotus-eater in Most Annoying Masseur Behavior You've Experienced
