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Woof! And the dog's cute, too.

That's odd; I think about it every day.

Never met him, but if there's a Hall of Fame for butts, he should be inducted.

Aside from the cost, if you need a bag that big to carry your shit around, stay home; your supply chain needs are off the chart.

How ironic would it be to be topped by a roofer?

Mrs. Watson, clear my calendar. And no calls, please.

UberEats?

Stop saying cut it off before someone actually does; this whole thing could get ugly. I'd love to know what Dear Abby thinks about this, but I assume that when she read the original post, she fainted. This is an unfortunate mess, with no one at fault, and a rare case of two rights making a wrong. I'll adopt a rule that if it smells icky, and looks icky, and sounds icky, it's probably icky. So, walk away before icky gets sticky. BTW, will father and son see each other at Thanksgiving? I'd like to buy a seat for that.

I want to follow you around and pick up the crumbs you leave behind. Especially the handsome ones.😉

Old enough to know better. Not there yet.😉

And a horrible story it must be. But maybe it depends.

I asked God to give me all things that I might enjoy life; instead, I was given life that I might enjoy all things. - attributed to an anonymous Confederate soldier The kingdom of heaven is within you. - Luke 17:21

A Portrait in Love and Trust [My eyes leak]

Parking like that is just asking to get rear-ended!

They mean theirs, not yours.

So, he's the one that's dreaming.

That story made my eyes leak. Thank you. [We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give. - Winston Churchill]

So that's why I keep hearing "No teeth, bitch!"

It is an absolute and unforgivable miscarriage of justice that I am limited to awarding but one single eyeroll emoji 🙄per post. This post clearly merits multiple 'moji's on many levels! And yet, exceedingly well done!🤣

That is hilarious! And thank you for the additional info on the apartment situation; it puts things in a different light. I agree that there is some risk in every meeting with an unfamiliar provider, no matter where the meeting takes place. Most of mine are in nicer hotels and which generally have good security and a staff who mind their own business about my business. Logging all visitors is a very good measure, providing an even better safeguard than a vigilant hotel staff. So, I'll relax my concerns for safety in your home. But, please, still be careful. Years ago in LA, I went to a provider's home, a rented house he shared with two other men. I didn't know that going in and thankfully didn't meet the other roommates during my visit; that would have greatly unnerved me. The house was in a part of town neither grand nor gross, neither Brentwood nor Watts. But the roommate situation and the neighborhood vibe, especially after dark, made me feel uneasy. Several years later, I had a similar experience in DC, minus the roommate element. That was the last time I did an in-call with a new provider.

Aah, the hunky Will Parfitt, from Melbourne, Down Under. AKA the Channing Tatum of Australian strippers, and one of my many crushes!

Or alternatively, "in my humble opinion."

It's like mail marked URGENT, IMPORTANT, OPEN IMMEDIATELY. Individually or collectively, they all mean Bullshit.

Your life, not mine, but why in the world would you invite an unknown provider (let alone two of them together) into your apartment? It just strikes me as inherently risky, and it seems you got off easy from the encounter, even if being an uncomfortable one. It could have ended much worse. (My thought has always been, they don't need to dump the body if I'm killed in my place.) Please be careful!

Between the two us, at least one of doesn't know what a twunk is.