TallMuscl37

I’m getting ready to start traveling full force this month. Hopefully no more police killings/“riots” cancel or interrupt my trip. Trying to do as much as possible before summer ends, and the first frost begins. All road trips.

I actually do have a card that I did plan to use for rental cars and hotel deposits, but the first hotel I tried using it...happened to be a Springhill Marriott that held $100. I had literally stayed there a month prior, and it was only $25. Clearly they needed to jump the gun, deeper into the pandemic. After I checked out, they took forever to refund the amount...even taking it out again 2 weeks later, which interfered with one of my rental car reservations. They claim they didn’t take it out, but I know some credit cards will wait forever for the “merchant“ to send the authorization. Sometimes the better option is to call each hotel individually before booking and asking about the incidental hold. I’ve saved face that way a few times.

blah, blah, blah...I’m not reading all that. You spent a lot of time justifying that, but the point I’m saying is: if they didn’t do it before, why do it now? Yes they have rules and regulations, so on and so on. That’s what they’re supposed to have. I’ve been hurt by hotels more than enough times, to understand that (bedbugs, car broken into, rude guests I’ve almost had to fight b/c staff incompetent, food and respiratory illnesses that I’m POSITIVE was incurred from a hotel...list goes on) I’m not going to sit here and “be understanding” of what hotels have to go thru. The only reason I made the example I did, was to make the connection of how there’s risks on both ends. I take deposits because, if and when someone cancels, I don’t get paid shit. Not a goddamn thing. Whereas if someone messes up a room, well hell, atleast they got paid for the room. I’m not underestimating the responsibility hotels have and why deposits are likely to their advantage, but $100? To stay at a fucking Super 8? And one place in Dallas last year, the Hawthorne suites in north Dallas tried to tell me I needed to pay a $300 deposit for 1 night. Who the F they think I’m doing, moving in? So no, I’m not going to kiss up to hotels. Sorry. If I pay a hotel in advance, no reason for an extra $100 to be held on my account. It’s simply corporate riff raff that is intended to keep people who aren’t staying on a corporate account, out. When I stayed in Palm Springs gay resort last year, I paid the hotel $230 for 2 nights, and didn’t have to pay anything extra to “hold” for damages. Again, if a hotel actually had room service and spa and a selection of refrigerator items, I can understand. But not some fucking basic hotel that serves Grab n go breakfasts in the morning. And then tell me, “because people smoke and damage the room”. Bitch, what the F that has to do with me? I don’t smoke and I’m 1 person by myself, no kids ??‍♂️ I also don’t buy “karma” by tipping maids. Sometimes I do, other times I don’t. If it’s a big nice room in a big city and I made some decent money, I might. But I don’t trash rooms. I throw all my shit in the trash, flush the toilet, and leave it clean. I also bring my own top sheet to play on. One maid quoted, “your room was the cleanest and easiest I’ve had”. I’m not going to make their job hard, but I also have spent upwards of 90% of my earnings on hotels some days...I really don’t feel the need to always tip, especially if I’m “on tour” and staying in hotels for 20 or 30 days at a time.

Count your blessings. I had 2 clients my age and younger clients earlier this week, and 1 mid week. But it’s still overall feel of dead. Nothing planned in advance, no hotel Outcalls, nothing really making me feel inspired that I can make the move into my own incall place just yet. The leasing lady called me today asking if I’m ready to sign, I said...I wanted to say; I need pray ?? on it. Client today canceled, but I figured he was full of anyway, trying to get around my deposit policy. And it reminds me again why I don’t let them slide because the convenient, “I woke up with a sore throat and need to cancel” jive. That said, yes this is a blip... but it’s a recurring blip. And it’s costing us dearly. Every time this happens, it takes 2 weeks minimum to return to normalcy. Travels and escort tours are going to be not at full potential. That’s 2 weeks of canceled, almost, and speculative bookings down the drain. And let’s not even think about how some Black escorts may be adversely affected. Even the occasional text, “black cocks ? matter to me”, doesn’t help the cause lol. As much as I don’t condone injustice of any kind, and I even had to correct a client the other day: Stop ? ✋?. don’t try to justify the shooting, because at the end of the day, we’ve already seen things being escalated far beyond what was necessary on more than 1 occasion, and little to nothing being done. So... if the government is going to be okay bailing out insurance companies for riot damage they may no longer be able to afford, or providing more stimulus checks for those who have their business’s destroyed, then goddamit, fucking do something to better it. However; I think we also need to pause a bit and ask ourselves is it really worth reacting to every event. I’m not talking about fake news. Like an old photographer once told me, “I stopped watching news because it’s become nothing more than a police blog”. And that’s the thing, media is always going to push the most sensational stories, because it gains attention. And it’s always going to be about who shot who, who was murdered where, what fatal accident happened there... it’s all police business that the average American brain, doesn’t need to digest. It’s just negativity and noise. But that negativity and noise is affecting our business, even as sex workers. Minor incidents or even everyday friendly encounters aren’t going to make it to headlines.

Exactly, that’s why I say let’s not assume like everything is just fine. Even though I said things were actually a little better, it still gets setback when once again, there’s World War 3 going on in cities across the country. And that’s not taking away or minimizing from the issues at hand, it’s just nothing happening at the moment that has been conducive to sex work. But perhaps maybe it IS being conducive indirectly, by sending the message that policing is outdated and perhaps that could open the doors to decriminalizing sex work in some ways. I did. But I also know the current fuck bastards aren’t doing a goddamn, mother f-? ing thing either to be on sex worker sides. But I also seen this which could give some hope:

Thanks. I'm trying to. But it's hard not to. For example, I was planning to go to both Minneapolis and Wisconsin this and next month, but both trips were put on hold for obvious reasons. So there goes my tour potential for most of the month. I know clients be wanting to get that escape, so sometimes us working in the thick of things can be a good thing. But I also know lots of people will only use us for an escape, and not actually meet. And this week I've been dealing with more of the same. Part of me just wants to quit until next year. This year, everytime I start to build momentum, some new bullshit comes around that sets me right back.

Sounds good, but I'm not understanding this: If I'm paying for a hotel in advance (thru a 3rd party or when they swipe my card), as in already paid... the refundable deposit for incidentals isn't really going to make or break the housekeeper. It's kind of like if a client paid my fee in advance. And then I asked, "now I just need to see your credit card and authorize an extra $100 incidentals for STDs. If I don't have any symptoms after 7 days, I'll refund the money back to you." They'd be looking at me like an alien. Obviously that's a facetious and extreme example, but it's the same concept. The housekeeping money is included in the money I pay for the room. It's almost at a point where I have to just keep $100 set aside on an untouchable card just for hotel incidentals.

Exclusive deals so to speak. Mainly thru the app. I also get 10% off all my express deals. Anytime I book thru PL, I tend to go for something nice... Because it's a big deal considering I don't always have those funds available on a card. And lot of places won't accept cash. And in certain cities, going to a bank for a deposit may not be an option if the bank I use isn't in town. Or I may not even have the extra available at all. Let's not pretend like nobody in our profession ever goes a week where they may only have less than $100-$200 in between lulls in business, especially when multiple bills are due in 1 week. I say discrimination because, on several instances they've admitted to doing so. Discrimination Mainly towards the priceline guest, but also I've even booked directly thru a hotel: one such place I've stayed 2 other times. Neither time was I asked for a deposit. One night, I checked in with a guy to have some fun time, and suddenly it's $100 deposit. Fortunately, he didn't mind putting it down. But then the next day, some other bitch going to say to us as we're checking out, "i didn't know there was 2 people in that room, it would have been extra". I said, "the person last night seen 2 were checking in" (and staying in 1 bed). Why the bitch had a need to have a problem, idk. But she almost got cursed out if it weren't for me trying to keep a cool head around my JFF contestant lol. I later did file a discrimination complaint, but I definitely won't be staying with them again. Fucking Homophobic bastards. And that's the stuff I refer to. The other thing is, the chain of hotels that I book thru, will list on their notes how much they will charge for incidentals. Most will only say for pets and smoking. But now, those same ones will charge incidentals anyway, even if it doesn't say anything about it. Only ones I've found that consistently don't are red roof inn and extended stay. Motel 6 doesn't either, but I hardly ever use those due to the flimsy beds and bare bones amenities. Though some in smaller towns tend to be doable

If I was staying on the Las Vegas strip, in a world class resort, I could understand. But I’ve had places like Super 8, Sleep Inn and even Marriott Springhill...request $100 deposits. Those same hotels would ordinarily take $0 or maybe $25 for incidentals. And like you said, there’s nothing to charge to the room anyway since food and beverage at many are either non existent or very limited. I’ve actually fared better staying at the upper level hotels than some of the smaller budget hotels. A Sheraton I stayed in one city, only held $1. And an Embassy suites in another town only held $20. Perhaps the pandemic has brought in a lot of trashy guests to the budget conscious establishments. Guess I’ll have to reconfigure where I stay. I am currently a diamond member with 2 hotel brands, but due to their iffy hotels that occasionally charge exorbitant deposits, I’ve been using my Priceline VIP status much more often. At the same time, the drawback with 3rd parties is, smaller hotels will demand a deposit, whereas booking thru the hotel directly may not.

Has anyone traveling been discovering this? I’m finding even budget hotels with no amenities are requiring it, especially when booking thru Priceline, but often times even when doing directly thru the hotel. It’s been 4 times this year that I’ve had to leave $100 for a deposit, and each time I’m waiting days. This week I checked into a hotel on Sunday, and just received the deposit back Wednesday morning. It’s really become a nuisance considering sometimes I may stay in more than 1 hotel in the course of a week. Or I may have a client in city who wants to meet, and I have to quickly pick a hotel nearby to where I am. It seems to have started back in the early stages of the pandemic. There’s been several hotels I’ve stayed at that didn’t charge deposits at all or only held like $20, now suddenly wanting $100. I’ve even been considering getting in touch with some legal aid seeing if anyone else may have been considering, because I feel it’s discrimination. At the same time, hotel laws could be all over the place. To me it really fucking defeats the purpose of getting a “budget” hotel, if you still have to cough up an additional amount that’s even higher than room rate. They always try to say because of previous guests did this, or did that... but I’m not previous guests. Charge them, not me. It’s also why I have to ask for deposit from clients to host. Because if I’m getting a room, and person does or doesn’t show up, I could easily be out $150 minimum, just from booking a hotel to host. Exactly why I’m ready to get into my incall spot and fuck hotels.

Some days I feel like things are busier, at other times I feel like I just want to quit and leave the biz. Everytime I look around there's something else going on, and I'm really not making that much money anyway. Trying to get into a new incall spot and seeing most of the places I want are $800+ a month, and then everytime cases go up or protests break out, it's another quiet few days or week. I'm just getting fucking fed up with this shit.

There actually was a ton of clients in Denver, and probably still is lol. It's just too many guys trying to compete for those tons. Not to mention the wealthier mountainous resort areas are brimming with money, albeit not a whole lot of "gay" money...but the bi and curious crowd in Denver and Colorado in general was really what kept me afloat when I was there. The main issue is when too many (especially questionable) "providers" come into a market that's not fit to handle it. I was fortunate to be able to hit Denver during it's heydays of backpage and men4rent/RB, but too many escorts there trying to make it...and Denver was really just a conservative best kept secret. Perhaps with more legalized marijuana, things could even out. Not to mention, there's many other mountain Western towns in the region that need a further gay revival: Cheyenne, Billings, Albuquerque. Unfortunately gay male escorting is almost unheard of to the first 2, whereas ABQ can only support so much as well. Some trips there it seems great, I can go back a month later and it could be completely dead. It'd be nice if similar to places like Arizona and Florida, Fort Collins and Co Springs could be get away towns with a decent population of clients. But sadly that's just not the case. I probably have come across no more than 10 clients in all the 10 years I've been in and out of Colorado, in both towns. Add that up lol.

@Rudynate On another note note, there's another local client who would regularly text me after a session, and go on and on about how he felt about something. It was like a therapy session. I'd explain, make him feel better...he'd hire me again, then swear he'd never see me again after, then hire me again...then be okay for a couple times, and then find something else to be offended about lol. Once he even accused me of elderly abuse because I asked him for a little extra funds because we went 2 hours overtime (generally in the form of varied conversation, not sex..which I didn't mind and actually liked to hear him talk about interesting things, except each time I visit him its an hour drive...that's 5 hours for a 1 hour session) I had to explain to him, $250 does not cover 3 hours of time together lol. Then he added something along the lines of hearing me counting cash in the other room. I'm like dude...yes, I counted your money in the other room along with my money just to verify what I had all together. Last time, I think he got offended about something again because he seems to have gone into "blow me off" mode. But now he's probably afraid to tell me because at one point I suggested he speak to a sex therapist instead of a sex worker, about discovering what he wants. So, I'm fine with first time and newbie client's. But I'm just not mentally equipped to handle that kind of baggage.

These weren't first timers though. They're guys who I've met several times. But, as a whole yeah....they like are new to how the whole escort dynamic works. And that I was glad to explain. As an update: I been able to sit both guys down (figuritively) in question. I just had to let them know to #1, not be so quick to take things to offense and #2, understand where I'm coming from when I say things. The Texas guy, we were able to get on good terms again, and he admitted he thought one thing while I was thinking another. I told him it's no guarantee that I'm even going to have enough to pay for my daily expenses and there and back. So he can't just hypothetically expect that I could just come way down and there and be okay on my own dime. I told him, he's the one who decided to take the job out there for 3 months, I shouldn't have to extend my finances to go see him...on my dime. We talked it out, but we seemed to agree to "take a break" for the time being. Which I think is best because, I'm starting to learn any kind of long distance relationship or friendship is best left to where you wait til you meet again. Because when communications get misunderstood and arguments arise, it always messes with the dynamic. So basically, we just not going to talk anymore until it's time for him to either come back, or be in position to have a week or few days off and at-least take care of the transportation part. But we're friends on Facebook so he gets to see me throughout the week anyway. But there's just not going to be any conversations 1 on 1 about what I'm doing and what he's doing.

I hope not. I think they'll be open to lend an ear and give in provided they don't get sidetracked by corona and police reform. Which all needs addressing, BUT. That's why (off topic and not trying to get too political, but I guess it would matter in pertaining to slow down in bookings) I've not been particularly enthusiastic about the BLM ✋? movement, even though I am a BLM. Only because I don't want to be watered down to a 3 letter acronym or 3 word sentence. I want something more specific: BGEMALM: Because gay escorts making a living, matters. It's convenient and easy to acknowledge the B, but then forget about the g and the e. There's plenty of people who agree BLM, but yet have an issue with the gay and escort part. Add in Black, suddenly it becomes an issue of least concern. "Wake up, and suddenly...you're least concerned" (that better not be Kamala Harris)

Don’t get me started on Denver. Or guys who say they, “did really well” someplace lol. It becomes a case of: someone online said another person he hired said... But otherwise, you’re right. Denver has been a tricky market for awhile. My next run will be bringing me back out there, but I’m advertising well in advance... and making sure I come with enough for a hotel or air bnb for at least 3 days. Denver long ago out saturated their market. I moved there back in 2010/2011, it was a feeding frenzy. Men4Rent, Craig’s and backpage. Guys have tried to turn it into some kinda partying sex workers paradise, and it couldn’t support the influx.

clarify that last sentence: so joe and Kamala aren’t going to do anything pro sex workers, is that what you’re insinuating? (Not agreeing or disagreeing, just making sure I’m not the only one skeptical lol) that said, re: traveling providers. Let’s not make assumptions. You say escorts who can “afford” to travel. Versus locals who charge less. But sometimes it’s not about an escort who can afford to travel, it may be their current market is so depressed and dead, they are forced to travel to make ends. Or on a lesser extent, make up for lost time.

Well “count it all joy“. Like I mentioned, not all markets are faring the same. May I ask, what’s your prices? I still say a whole: many cities are not experiencing the same uptick. I know in Kansas City, it’s been dead all week long. Only 1 client all week. Had a few “inquiries” and fake bookings who never confirmed. Always throws salt on the circumstance. I’m not too pressed considering I been living part time in another area where it’s a bit more busy. However, many of the small towns right now are brutal and likely being hit the most. It seems the only way to make any money in the biz right now is to be situated in a city. And I’m not talking about the surrounding suburbs of a city. I’m talking within 5 miles of an airport, business district or downtown. It has been hell and high water trying to make it in a town much further than that. Nobody is hiring gay male escorts in these small towns. Nothing but cheap ass gay men once you start getting into the suburbs and outer metros. They don’t be wanting to pay for diddly. They see you selling massage, they say they don’t pay for sex (adam4adam guys mainly). And rentmen and rentmass is practically non existent outside the gay metros. I think even if they have the money, they’re hesitant to spend it. Which also would apply to the older crowd and reasons behind its decline. that’s why I said on Twitter, first thing Kamala needs to do if and when she gets in the office, is help reverse fosta/sesta. Because that killed off a lot of money making potential in small towns and cities with Craigslist and backpage. The gay escort and massage sites are mainly only going to be found by the Gay/bi men who are seeking that service. Craigslist and the like helped bridge the gap to bring in guys who wouldn’t of considered it otherwise until they seen the ad. And now all of our public “classified” ads have been taken off the shelf.

That sounds good. In a perfect World. But only problem with that (and why I changed my like to a meh lol), it puts the cart before the horse. I don’t like when clients come with a list of things to change before even meeting me. Those same clients could also be the ones saying, sorry I have to cancel, and “we didn’t make an appointment” when asked for a cancellation fee. Well, you just criticized my looks AND demanded I make special concessions for you... to hell you didn’t make an appointment lol. It’s similar to when clients have asked me to shave my chest, or beard, or or don’t shave my chest or beard... before even meeting me. If polished nails are that much a bother, carry a bottle of nail polish remover (not poppers, the regular stuff lol) and pay an extra $100 in case the guy paid for a manicure already. That said, in defense of non polished nails, I recently tossed out 2 bottles of clear nail polish that I’d been carrying around for YEARS lol. I used to really like those in the corporate world, but now I find I end up peeling them off, scuffing them. I also didn’t find it made my nails any more or less healthier. Most of my nail issues are with my cuticles, as I’m often digging into luggage and such. What he said lol

can you run this by me again: you saying you only paid $250 to move in, and got first two months free? This almost sounds too good to be true. I always ask people: if you going to tell me something that sounds too good to be true, be sure to include all the caveats lol. Like some people, “I just got a new car with no money down! Okay, but what’s your monthly payments and insurance like? Lol.

Thanks. But it wouldn’t of mattered how I said it. His whole thing, based on what he mentioned...was that I would simply travel along the way and work, and then come see him for that day. It sounds good on paper IF I was already headed that direction, but like I said...I don’t tour Texas like that anymore (even though I did hit Dallas last month, on a spur of moment). That’s pretty much how I said it. He was offended that I said anything about him paying for it (and I even told him an amount) I explained to him: Any money I make along the way would be for my daily expenses and towards my income for the week. Hotels, food, money set aside for unexpected emergencies is factored into that. He even had the nerve to say, “so stop asking me.” I said, “I’m not asking I’m TELLING YOU, I’m not revolving a tour around seeing you for 1 day”. And he even said, “if you needed gas money, you could have just said that”. And I’m like no, no, no lol. I wasn’t trying to say that. I said exactly what I wanted to say: if I go down to see him, I need a whole week hotel paid for (his company doesn’t allow him to have guests over) and/or cushion money for the effort and expense coming down. I been filling my tank up twice a week these past few weeks, traveling. I can afford gas lol I learned that lesson the hard way earlier this year: Went to visit a client for our bi-annual Florida Keys trip. He paid me 1/4 in advance and the rest when I got down there. Even though it was well worth my while, and I took a few clients along the way (and of course, that has to be done carefully as to not tire oneself out)...a week after our session, I was already depleted of the funds I earned due to unexpected emergencies. Add the fact it was high season in Florida and hotels weren’t cheap, and business was garbage the whole week. That just created a ripple effect, to where a weekend trip, ended up with me being “stuck” there for over a month...then coronavirus hit. I told my client, I won’t be making anymore trips to Florida EVER unless I fly in directly and have a rental car. And go during off season where I can rent a car, because I was there and every place was sold out. Thank God for COVID-19, because the last week I was there in mid-March, I was finally able to get a break. I’m getting to a point, I feel the need to start demanding more from guys. When I hear guys are getting paid $2,000 a week, AND having all their hotels and expenses paid for, how much fucking more do I deserve? I don’t want gas money lol. Pay for me a room someplace for a week, and pay me gas money for coming, AND pay me $500 for the effort and wear and tear of coming lol. Sometimes you have to just teach them, how you want to be treated. But some gay guys have a problem with having their fellow gay guy, being even remotely more comfortable than they are. They think anytime they give something, they are being a sugar daddy. No. Understand what the I been thru 1st, and see it’s nothing about trying to get off on someone. It’s just not fair for someone who’s making more money with less expenses coming out of it, to make a person with less money and more expenses coming out of it, use it towards expenses needed to get 2 people together.

I was being facetious, it was more of a metaphor. As to some businesses being in high demand during a particular period. I'm pretty sure there's gonna be so much surplus sanitizer, the oceans and lakes will turn into the stuff...in 20 years ?

lol, I’ve actually been able to get him to cool it a bit...and the tone wasn’t as “dramatic” as previously. Idk what the fuck was going thru his head. but we’ve not had the in person chat yet. Will be doing so this week though. And I get it 100%. I know how it is to be offended about criticism. And as long as somebody isn’t doing it in front of others or doing so in an aggressive way (like people have done to me, and came off as proper assholes lol), I think it can only help in the long run. Next time we speak, I’m going to ask him: would you rather have someone who can be authentic and real around, or would you rather have someone who’s going to be artificial and fake, and then talk shit behind your back later? I would hate that. But as @Monarchy79 said in another thread of mine, some people don’t want that reality. They reach a point where they don’t realize or don’t care. And that’s not picking on or making fun of clients who aren’t beauty queens per say. But if they are atleast aware and in tune to their overall self image, that can create a better escort/client dynamic. Like I said, the misconception that we're being paid to deal with poor hygiene, or clients extreme health neglects...needs to be crushed. I don't care if a guy is not attractive, but if he at-least takes care of himself, that's all that is important. I've met non-beauty queen clients who were still fun to play with, because they didn't neglect self awareness. But I had a client few months ago who had an extreme case of butt warts....and wanted to get fucked before his surgery. I was fine until it seen his ass. And it wasn't clean. I lost my hard on completely. Fortunately I had a "helper" in my bag, and some condoms. And bleach. And boiling water. I was absolutely not fucking him, even despite the fact HPV is common in most everyone sexually active.

Wow that’s a steal. Haven’t had that luck in my area. They want rent+deposit equal to rent due before move in. That’s been the issue to, finding places with decent move in specials in the Midwest.

I’ve actually noticed bookings have gone up. In fact, every since the pandemic started, the number of completely “dead” weeks (that is, weeks where I have 0 bookings or inquiries) have actually been less. Like I said earlier on, when people were bashing me for still clients despite the stay at home restrictions: not every business is being affected the same. If someone works for or owns a hand sanitizer company, they’re probably a billionaire lol. Don’t get me wrong: it’s certainly not the roaring 20s. It’s still kinda slow as a whole, but it’s been that way for awhile. And some markets could be dead, others okay, and yet others booming. I still say: what pandemic? Yes...it’s a medical mystery and global health crisis right now, but it’s still not enough to stop gay men from having sex like Syphilis and HIV were. And it’s not directly sexually transmitted either. That’s not to water down the situation, but it is what it is. I talk with clients about it from time to time. One of my clients who is HIV positive and chats with his doctor a lot, seems to point to signs that perhaps the virus was around a lot longer, but he also mentioned something about HIV positive guys on ARVs haven’t been affected as severely. But I’m not stating facts, just industry insight. Everyone has to choose what they want to receive and believe.