I feel your pain. I loved poppers. It got to the point where
I was using them regularly even just to jerk off. Of course,
the effect wains and I needed more and more for less and
less.
In addition since I’m a top, I had to be very careful about
regulating my use of them. Add to that some reports of retinal
damage in men who use poppers, and I decided I had to quit....
before I went blind (maybe Mom was on to something there....)
I threw out every last bottle and made sure I was in an environment
where is wasn’t so easy to get them on the spur of the moment.
At first I craved them pretty bad. I did the usual addict behavior
like looking for the one hidden bottle, checking the trash to make
sure there wasn’t one there, going online and looking at bottles
for sale, intentionally seeking the bottoms I knew who used them....
After a month or so I was fine and felt kind a foolish about the
whole thing. Now, I don’t mind if my bottom wants/needs them,
but it’s really easy for me to abstain.
I wish you luck. Trust me, you’re better off without them.