MaybeMaybeNot

Thank you, everyone, for responding, and thank you, @purplekow. I was hoping you'd find this and offer some insights. I will check into that. Autoimmune disorders do run in my family, so perhaps there's something there. I will see what else I can find. That is helpful, and I really appreciate it!

I've been struggling with this, and I thought I'd reach out to you all for perspective and insight. I didn't start having sex of any kind until I was 32. I didn't come out to myself until I was 40. Although I have had my share of sex, I've never had a really regular schedule of sex. I have an older partner whom I adore but takes meds that have killed his sex drive. We were never really compatible anyway (both are sides, he doesn't like to suck). I am not on prep (not really into anal very much, worried about the side effects of the drug). I am pretty conservative sexually. I like kissing, touching, and getting sucked. In the past couple years, it's been harder to vet out possible partners. Last year, I met up with a guy after a dry spell, and he wanted me to 69. He was nice, good-looking, and I obliged. I never got his cum in my mouth, but I caught oral gonorrhea. I got really sick, not realizing I caught it, and had pain in my knees until I went in for routine testing. After I was all clear for that, I thought I learned my lesson. I went to a bar in the area where they have a "play" space. I ended up making out with two guys. I had a few other vanilla partners, and I got oral gonorrhea again just from kissing. (As the health provider said, "You have to kiss pretty deep," to which my response would be, "That's when it's fun.") I am pretty sure I got it from a guy who later talked about blowing a guy on a cruise ship a couple weeks before. I am now very nervous about sex of any kind (I also got an STD about 7 years ago from a guy I should have followed my instinct in . . . his house was disgusting). My partner is understanding, but it's very embarrassing to go to a straight urgent care doctor and explain what happened, and it's embarrassing to tell my partner (who has anxiety around health issues). How do you guys, who hire and have much more active sex lives, mitigate the health risks of your hobby and sex in general when consistent sex partners is almost impossible. I am meeting up with a guy who I met in the bar above tomorrow night for some naked cuddling, and after seeing a few guys suck on his cock in the bar, I'm not comfortable going too far when I really want to. Any insight would be appreciated.

So, gayporno.fm isn't working at the moment. It has always worked before; hopefully it will again.

I like gayporno.fm

I don't hire, but some of these "tactics" that have been attacked seen more like traditional marketing (forming a relationship in order to sell a product or service . . . or in this case, earn trust to buy aservice) than predatory behavior. As long as the person is of legal age and can decline without reprimand (such as offering a subordinate or losing a tip), I don't think it is as awful as some think.

I started when I was 5 or 6. I got a sore at some point and my mom took me to the doctor. That is tremendously embarrasing now, since she clearly learned what I was doing. I stopped a few years later (I felt to guilty) but resumed in 7th grade, and it started to make more sense then.

His vulgar tweets from her personal account suggest either a major lack of self-control or mental health issues.

I like lpsg.com as well. As with here, I enjoy reading people's candid thoughts and experiences about sex and desire.

I saw Benn in LA. He was very nice, very attractive. He was new, probably gave me too long of a lap dance. But I enjoyed touching him. Very nice man

Thank God my dad never had the talk with me. It would have been way, way too awkward. Instead, my parents were happy when they were going to talk about sex at youth group at church. All we heard about, though, was to wait until marriage. I guess I already knew most of the rest. And the sermon must have helped. I was a virgin until I was 32, though I am still not married.

Maybe I was there and couldn't see. Sounds like you had a great time, though, with a nice team of guys.

That's awesome. Where was it? Were you out in the open?

I missed it! Who was involved???

I had to leave around 10:30. Did I miss any shenanigans?

It's hard to say. Bring more than you think since there is usually no cash machine on site. I usually budget what I want to spend and bring a bit more. I am thinking of going tonight. Is anyone else going?

I have had a very unexciting sexual life. I have had sex at two businesses. One was with the owner of a frame store. I popped in, looked around while he helped his last customer. She left, he locked the door, and we headed to his back work room. He has my cum stain on his work chair. Another time, about a month ago, I got hit on by this guy online. We chat, I go to his address. It is a liquor store. I just found out I once declined a hookup with a hot guy who now does OnlyFans. He was so out of my league, but he wanted to fuck bare. I do not do that. He recently started an OnlyFans.

I think you have to trust your instincts. Also, things could get very bad very quickly in this scenario, and you could be caught in the middle. If you decide, however, to pursue. There is no harm in waiting a couple weeks to make sure they don't have second thoughts. This is, after all, something that could affect them in the long run.

How about sex with an audience? Or sex while others watch over zoom? Or hire two escorts who work out the evening's activities ahead of time, so you are clueless and not in control? Or, play a strategy game with stripping rules, and the winner calls the sexual shots afterwards?

I am so interested in going but worried above Covid rising. Sigh.

He couldn't have found a nicer guy to start with.

I have been to one, just to watch. Think fuck benches with people lined up, guys taking advantage of both holes. A bed with a few couples playing on it. Lots of hot naked guys finding lots of other naked guys to pleasure each other all over the place.

I once went to The Zone is Los Angeles, and they had what you described. It closed, a casualty of the pandemic.

I also think it has a lot to do with the pressure to look good and be compared to the muscular guys we now see everywhere. I was in high school in the early 90s and was probably part of the generation that moved away from gang showers or showering in public. I do think, however, we need to keep in mind what I notice on the LPSG board, which is that for every post bemoaning ridiculous modesty in locker rooms, there's a post about hot guys and dick-watching in the locker room. And how many hidden camera videos have you seen online? I understand why people's comfort level bring naked in the locker room has dropped over the decades. As I've gotten older, I have grown more comfortable with it. I have a horrible body, but I just change quickly and hope no one notices. I usually put on my shirt, then drop my towel and put on my underwear. I don't go to the gym but sometimes find myself at water parks or pools. I remember the day I stopped worrying about it. I was at a water park, and they had a fairly unpleasant changing area. There was a long line waiting to get to the private changing rooms (which were the gross cement kind). I didn't want to wait and utilized the open space also reserved for changing. My friend was so uncomfortable, he didn't change at all and wore wet shorts in the car. Now, the few times I've been to sex parties (out of loneliness when I moved to a new city, never to actually participate), I would walk around with just a short-sleeve buttoned-down shirt that was unbuttoned. It was as a courtesy to people who didn't want to see my body but not so covered I felt out of place or disrespectful to the many naked guys.

Coolwave, you lead a very exciting life. I am in LA (though not for the holidays). If you ever want a cameraman for your adventures, let me know. 😉

I hope he is as nice of a guy as he seems on Instagram.