peter831

I say no, thanks, and move on to my next choice

@ANotAMouse, definitely report the incident to RM. I found them most helpful when a fellow tried to scam me. Of course take the advice you've been given here. Guarantee you it's going to be ok. He wanted to scare you, make you worry, make you uncomfortable. In that he has succeeded. But that needs to be done now. You are going to be OK. And live and learn. Chalk it up as a tough lesson. This is a great hobby, but none of us can afford to be careless. Remember this is a business transaction. Treat it as carefully as you would any other event or experience where you are trading your hard earned money for goods and services. 
And go get some exercise. You'll feel much better.

I hope you're ignoring him and everything is over by now. You should also post his name on here for us to know if this is a once in a lifetime case or he freaks out when he feels he's ghosted. 
He certainly has a lot of issues.

In my experience, bottoms and tops come in all shapes and sizes. If you're talking about providers, I suspect what you're seeing is market dynamics. The former twinks who marketed themselves as bottoms, can probably command more clients and money as tops. Me and my husband tend to hire verse and tops, simply because I'm a bottom and my husband has no desire for two bottoms. 

Is this a question or a complaint?

He's a really nice guy, but I wouldn't repeat. Interesting to talk to, but not so much in the bedroom.

I spent time with Ryan. Not intimate time of course, but we attended a few events and were seated together. Keep your thousand. 

this story as described by OP is highly improbable.  
The idea that someone brand new to this hobby (and this site) gets a death threat from a simple inquiry that didn’t result in a booked appointment ?  No - that just doesn’t happen.  And if by some long-shot, portions of the story are true - you just block the person from contact on various phone numbers and move on.  
It’s beyond belief to think an established provider is going to travel a long distance to somehow retaliate for a simple ghosting. Even more so when the provider has been positively reviewed here & would put his entire reputation/career at risk for a non-event. 
reviewed providers on this site frequently check it to see what people are saying about them.  If any of this actually happened & the provider is unhinged - I’d say the OP has made the situation worse.  The correct way to handle it would have been either say nothing & block him, or if posting the story here, name the provider & help others avoid a potential problem.
As is, it’s a far-fetched story that doesn’t make sense without any real purpose or help to the community. 
btw  - don’t text providers months in advance to set- up appointments. It’s a waste of everyone’s time & the provider should have known the OP wasn’t serious from the start. 

Ignore him.
Practice "safe whoring" in the future. (i.e. use a burner phone).
Loose the fear. Nothing is going to happen. 

there is a way to get a WhatsApp number that is different from your real phone number.  Depending on how you use WhatsApp, you may want a different number.
In the US, when someone has your real phone number (if it’s the same as WhatsApp) - they can basically find out everything about you through a reverse number search which yields your name. Once they have your name and phone number, everything else follows including home address & friends/associates.  Depends on search site they use, but there are several.
Vast majority of providers would never engage in privacy invasion - but it only takes one to cause major headaches.
Btw - the easiest online scam on any social site is they try to move the conversation offline & get your real phone number.  The frequent goal is harassment, blackmail & extortion More common than people think.  Especially on Grindr. 

Don’t worry about it. He’s not able to hack you just by having your number. Clearly he’s unstable if simply being unresponsive to a message causes such a reaction. You’ve done the right thing by blocking him. Just be vigilant about any texts from unsolicited or unknown numbers and don’t open attachments from them (as you would do normally anyway). I think you were correct to report it to RM. 

the scam isn’t for cash, at first.  usually they are looking for information & personal details - frequently they want to move conversations offline to WhatsApp or similar.  Once they have a real phone number, you’re totally fucked.  
This happens all the time - more common on hookup apps where there is more information exchanged.
Someone presenting a harmed victim seeking sympathy is the oldest trick in the book. Conman 101 
you guys are way too gullible & naive - albeit well intentioned. 

YOU GUYS ARE GETTING TROLLED, AGAIN 
this is exactly the same type post as two previous threads - all from members who just joined within days of making their first posts. And the first post is their lengthy dialogue presenting unusual/emergency circumstances & then asking for comments, advice.
 
this one even pre-emptively says “I’m not a troll…..”  yes, he is 
 
the other two are @Empire_Man “Friendship With A Gay-For-Pay Pornstar”
@ANotAMouse “Please Help Me, I’m Scared to Death”
 

FWIW - I think you guys are getting trolled. 
This story is similar to the other thread “Please Help, I’m Scared to Death”
both stories posted by new members on this site.  both with a long & detailed story about very unusual provider situations that don’t make sense.  and for both, it was their first provider experience.   both posted their stories within a few days of joining the site.
both seeking advice, but not really seeking advice 
coincidence ??  
may be wise to check to see how long these people have been members or what else they’ve posted before engaging them with their unique & far-fetched provider problems. the members intentions are good to help, but someone is obviously trying to take advantage of the goodwill.

I think now we know why the Gay-For-Pay guy got so upset! 

Please don’t double post…topic merged

as (some of us) told you before, it's time to move on!
the guy was ungrateful like most truly gay per pay guys seem to be, possibly PNP had something to do or maybe he can see the end of his career coming and wants more. 
Just move on! Consider yourself lucky he's not blackmailing you!

2nd time you post the same story!
 
 

Oh my.
Yet a other victim of a successful "hustler".
It was "pay-what-you-want" not don't pay me. This wasn't a relationship it was a long played hustle.
Sorry you were hurt. I happens to people all the time. A topic of conversation here more than once.

I experienced someone like him years ago. These guys are expert and - I mean EXPERT manipulators. They tell you exactly what you want hear and transform themselves to whomever you imagine them to be - chameleon like. They love to play the role of a victim as well.  They drain you emotionally and financially and disappear when they’ve taken what they wanted. Best thing to have happened to you is that he blocked you everywhere. You need to move on and see this as a learning experience and eye opener. 

50+ gifts worth thousands and thousands of dollars?
Your friend has maybe formulated these types of connections with many different men over the years making him very good at what he does. 

You don’t pay for or buy friends. Those recipients aren’t friends. 

I'm trying to make sense of what you wrote since I've never had a friendship like that.  By that I mean where I would buy thousands of dollars of gifts for someone whom I once hired as an escort but with whom I formed what seemed like a genuine friendship.  I don't buy gifts for friends regularly apart from maybe birthdays and Christmas (if that).  I take friends out to eat, but they reciprocate.  It's clearly not one sided where one is the gift giver and the other is the recipient, which is what I assume was going on in your friendship given what you wrote.  If it's one sided, it isn't much of a friendship unless you obviously make a lot more money and simply feel like being generous with someone because you know they are struggling financially.
I really don't know what was going on between you and your apparently former friend. If he considered his in person time with you to be on-the-clock, then the onus was on him to tell you his rate and let you decide whether you wanted to visit him.  Accepting whatever you offered and then stating years later that you weren't paying him as much as he felt was fair is just bad business on his part.
At any rate, I don't think you can do anything now other than move on.  Given that he's blocked you, he obviously is no longer interested in being a friend.  Either he simply did feel like you were a client with whom he got along and you got the wrong impression, and now he's annoyed you have been underpaying him and thus blocked you.  Or maybe he did consider you a friend and something happened to change those feelings (either something you said or did or simply some other outside thing in his life that made him reconsider your friendship).

I've never met with anyone, and I'm several years older than you.  What immediately jumped out at me was the phrase "provably on PrEP" and "willing to slip (me) a dose".  I cannot stress enough that a person cannot rely 100% on another's declaration of health status or their reported use of PrEP - provable or otherwise.  Compliance with medication cannot be proven, so even if you are shown a prescription or a bottle of pills, you have NO way of knowing whether or not your partner is using the medication correctly or at all.  Your health is 100% your responsibility, and entrusting it to another is extremely risky.    But only you can decide how much risk you are willing to assume.  As for having a dose or two of PrEP slipped to you, that is also very unwise.  How would you know if you were even given PrEP?  Plus, these are medications that can have significant side effects, and should only be prescribed by a physician who can assess your compatibility with the meds.  It isn't like asking someone for an aspirin.  I cannot tell anyone what they should or should not do, but if you are not at the point where you can receive advice from your own doctor about this, I question whether or not you should be considering a meet-up, given that you've referred to the safety aspect as the most important consideration.   Not trying to be a wet blanket, but I wouldn't want you to jump into a situation you may regret afterwards without fully assessing the risks.