BtmBearDad

Pity he doesn’t have an RM ad. He certainly is attractive, and I’m sure would pull.

I would agree - there’s normally “something” that gives it away. Could be a mannerism, a mole, their voice, etc.. But that really only applies if you know both of them. I’ve cousins, and nieces that are identical twins. To most people just seeing them it’s always “OMG! How do you tell them apart?” But to me, and those who know them, it’s not terribly tricky. In this case tho, given I thought my FWB, and I were in the house alone, and given the fact I never met or even knew he had a twin, I think I can be forgiven for failing to notice - especially given the activities engaged in during said switcheroo! 😜

What more is there to tell? 😏 Just a college rugby jock accompanying his basketball jock FWB to his place down the Shore, only to be surprised that basketball buddy’s identical twin was joining us in our sexcapades. 🤷🏼‍♂️ Picture three young, horny college jocks naked from Friday to Sunday in all sorts of very mutual combinations 😉 I was scandalised, sated, and sore by the time it came to head back to college.

🙋🏼‍♂️ Freshman year, met one of the guys in the room next door in the dorm on move in day. Tall glass of Irish-American water - was getting some sort of money from basketball. Turned out we lived very near each other at home - he was just a few blocks south - but went to different schools, so didn’t know each other, but knew some people in common. Of course we both strategically dropped certain names of guys we “knew” to check the other’s reaction. Very sweet, fun, hot guy, but a stereotypical “dumb jock” type. Anyway, play ensued. Nothing serious - very much a FWB thing - it was just handy for us both being next door. So he comes back from Thanksgiving, says he wants us to head to his house down the Shore on the weekend. Sign me up! While we had been playing with each other, (and others), on the regular, it was still in the dorm where walls are wafer thin, and you’re in a twin bed 😂 It was supposed to be just us, and my horny college boy mind was reeling at all the horny things I wanted to do. Unbeknownst to me, my buddy had other plans. Mind you, I knew he had a brother - but I had no idea it was a twin brother, let alone an identical twin brother! Yes, they pulled the whole “switcheroo” on me before the big reveal! I do remember thinking “that’s different, feels different” - little did I know! 🙈 That was one very hot, and very fun dirty weekend down the Shore! 😈 BBD

It’s funny because it’s true! 🤣 I’ve a few friends that I meet at the TH once in a while - we’re all in the same age cohort, (42-52, so basically Methuselah in any other gay bar), and at the TH, it’s like we’re 20-somethings again. Always good for a laugh, and a ego boost! 😜 And the bartenders have a delightfully heavy pour! 👍🏻

And just like that, the ad is gone!

@Unicorn that pic of the gent flashing a smile, wrapping a towel around himself poolside? Oh my! Whatever city he’s in, is one I need to get to! 😋 Pre-pandemic, offices downtown here in NYC, leaving work I’d see these two bloody gorgeous guys going for their run shirtless. I always saw them heading south by City Hall Park - beautifully muscled bodies, glistening with sweat, on full display, and I’d swear they went commando (there was a lot of bounce in those shorts!). One was blond, fairly smooth, the other brunette, somewhat hairy. Seeing them daily became part of my routine. I remember I was meeting a mate for drinks, so I told him to meet me at my office, and we’d walk to the pub. Of course City Hall Park was on the way! As we approached, I just told me mate “you’re going to appreciate this” and like clockwork my hotties ran on by. I have no idea about their backstory but over pints at the pub, we spun a few funny, imaginative ones! 😜

Beyond the items like eggs, meats, poultry that have shot up in price, what irks me are the prices on other items that as long as I can remember were always cheap, usually no-name or store brand, and for me anyone, things I’d pick up to have in the cabinet or the fridge as back up or when I’m in the mood. Examples: • Pasta - a 1 lb bag (all genres) used to be $.99, now they go for just shy of $2 • Beans - canned black or kidney beans were $.99 to $1.50, now they start at $2 • Cream Cheese - single bar used to be $1, now $1.99 • Iceberg lettuce - $2.99 a head!! • Potatoes - $5.49 for a 5lb bag • Onions - $2.29 for a 2lb bag • Frozen Veg - $3 for a small bag Don’t even get me started on fresh fruit! I get it’s not as huge an increase as some other items, still I can grumble as I check out, and wonder how my one bag contains $70 worth of groceries.

I’ve never been a “Slim Jim”. I’ve been 6’2” since I was about 14 yo, I’ve a big build, and throughout childhood, teens, uni days, and good few years after, I was in decent shape - muscular/beefy kind of fellow. But, as happens, the pounds packed on with more office, less gym time. I was always upfront in my RM client profile about my size. I’ve never been declined because of it. The most anyone ever said about it was in person a provider mentioned how I didn’t look the weight I listed at all, I carried it well. A well cut suit, shirt can hide a multitude of sins! 😜 There are certain providers who, for whatever reason, will decline an engagement with an overweight client. It is what it is. You can usually suss out if that’s the case in their profile text, their “into” section, even their interview answers. Also, look at the client profiles of any reviews. Of course, checking here will offer a ton of intel too - either in the forums or via PM/DM. These providers I believe are the ones to ignore, no matter how tempting. To my mind, they’re treating their RM ad more like a Grindr/Scruff/etc. ad. Especially the ones with the tag “Discount for VGL/Fit” or “Discount for college”. The providers who have no such language in their ads, don’t use those tags, are I believe the real professionals. As such, they’re the ones in high demand, and the ones you want to engage when possible. I would agree that it’s only polite or fair to let a provider know about any physical limitations involved - whether that’s because of weight or any other reason. I hesitate to use the word “deformities”, but advising the provider of any, shall we say, not regular physical conditions is also a good idea. Case in point - some years ago, when I still was playing rugby, I was nursing a leg injury. Meeting the provider at the bar for a drink prior to adjourning upstairs, I made mention about potential limitations due to the leg, and he went white as a sheet, and his eyes got wide as saucers. Anyway off we went, fun time was had by all, and after I did ask about his reaction in the bar. He kind of laughed a bit bashfully, and confessed to a similar interaction with a client in another bar earlier in the week where the client knocked back two doubles in quick succession, and joked with the provider not to worry, he had a wooden leg. Upstairs in the room, it turned out the client was being quite literal about having a “wooden leg” - he had a knee down prosthetic. Provider was totally shocked. So when I made my comment, his mind went to that client, and his leg comment. To be clear, provider said his only issue was he would have thought the client have mentioned it, as it was a bit of a shock, and his reaction was more of “I can’t believe it’s happening again” - the no notice bit. I agree with the provider - that definitely deserves an “oh I should mention I have a prosthetic”.

@mike carey I suppose I assumed it was European in origin as the family member I recall using it, a great aunt, spent a good part of the teens, twenties, and early thirties of the last century in Europe. When she referred to a scallywag, it was definitely an insult directed at a man of no means/background who was using his charm and other attributes to advance himself at the (usually) financial expense of women. Gosh! As I’m typing, I can hear her voice referring to one fellow who had married “above himself”, as they used to say, to a friend of hers, taken her for pretty penny, and moved on - “He was no gentlemen! He was a scallywag, and a bounder! Poor Millicent!” 🤣

Thanks but as above, it’s expired.

He hasn’t been on RM since 1/5, and his ad is now expired. 🤷🏼‍♂️

Nice find 👍🏻 He’s definitely not without his charms! 😉 I will say, the pics, (particularly the ink), look awfully familiar. Perhaps a name change? Following to see if any of our resident sleuths are able to ferret out any info 🕵🏼‍♂️

His ad is currently expired - name change or moved on? 🤷🏼‍♂️

Interesting - I never knew it’s origin! The context matches how I recalled it being applied. I just assumed it was European in origin 🤷🏼‍♂️

Haven’t heard that word in ages! 😂 It brings me back to my grandparents’ generation. In my memory, it was a cutting remark, and women were always highfaluting or putting on airs; a man was either a scallywag or a bounder.

Well, you see something new everyday I suppose 😜 I will say, to me, that is a bizarre ad for RM. No sex? Yeah, I agree he, and what he’s looking for, is better suited for SA. I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised at the crossover between RM and SA. As you say, why wouldn’t a provider want or be open to a long term arrangement? In my experience, what I know of this side of our hobby, the providers that have found that long term arrangement found from amongst their clients. There are providers who acquire a roster of regulars, and retire their ad; others who get into a one-on-one long term with a provider and retire; I also know at least 2 couples (I suspect a third lol) who met as provider and client, and both gave up this hobby and married. But then again, SA wasn’t around when these examples transpired, but now that it is, it makes perfect sense for there to be crossover between both of them. What was interesting to me most was the narratives on the SA ad vs the RM ad. You definitely got more of an insight into the real provider on SA. Sometimes it was 100% in line with the basics on their RM ad, but other times not so much.

Full disclosure, in the majority of my everyday life, I haggle. Whether it’s over a quoted price, to get something thrown in to sweeten the deal, to adjust terms, etc., it’s all part of the dance so to speak. Part of it is familial indoctrination, (“never pay full price!”), and part is my business life bleeding into my personal life. BUT, in this hobby, I don’t haggle. I know what I’m willing to pay, and if a provider’s fee falls in that range, we’re good. I don’t expect a comp from a provider just like I wouldn’t expect one from any other service provider. However, I agree with @BenjaminNicholas when he stated you have to spend money to make money. I’ve had providers pay for dinner, drinks, tickets to events, even received gifts. Granted these were from providers that I had long term relationships with, ones with whom I did things outside the boudoir with. I wouldn’t view any of it as a comp though. The closest I ever had to a comp was again with a regular provider. We had our session, and we’re just laying there chatting away as one does, I said something jokingly about how I should have arranged for a longer session, he offered he was free and could spend the night, I said I was tempted but not about to get up, get dressed, and go to an ATM, his reply was “don’t worry, I got this”. So we ordered room service, watched some TV, played, and went to sleep. Next time I included that fee but he wouldn’t take it. Thereafter, once in a blue moon, he’d ask to stay again on him. So I guess these handful of times would be a sort of comp. As to whether providers waive it all together for the hot clients - I cannot say. I would guess it does happen, but I’d also guess it is far more the exception than the rule. BBD

I’ve not seen an ad on RM yet that is explicitly looking only for a longer term sugar relationship, and not interested in the more standard provider/client engagements. I’ve seen a few where something along the lines of “open to longer term arrangements” is stated. I don’t think it’s anything new or shocking to see though. To my mind, the providers are letting their clients/potential clients know if they want it on the regular, it can be discussed. About 4 or 5 years ago, after reading some comments on here, and being encouraged by another member, I decided to try out SA. While it wasn’t for me, I was surprised at the amount of crossover between RM and SA. It was fascinating reading an ad on SA vs one on RM - the “real” vs the “fantasy” if you will. I don’t agree that in a longer term sugar, it’s the client who is the one providing the service. You both are. At the end of the day, whether it’s a standard engagement or a longer term sugar relationship, both provider and client are giving, and getting something in return. This works for some, others have no interest. Different strokes for different folks. BBD

Yes, your scenario does contribute, and can be helpful. 👍🏻 In fairness, I didn’t even think of those who bump a topic. My comments were aimed just at those who have no experience and/or no intention of hiring, but still make disparaging comments about the provider. These comments do not contribute, and are not helpful.