BtmBearDad

There was a time, once we knew travel really wasn’t an option last year, that I began thinking “Well, this will all be sorted, and we’ll be back to normal by next summer”. Alas, looks like that was a pipe dream. But, I did get a notice from BA regarding sale prices last week. Once I confirmed any purchase could be cancelled, and used by 4/2022, I booked a ticket for late August into September. R/T NYC-LON First Class on BA for $3200 is a steal! I haven’t seen any of my family or friends in the UK now since summer of 2019. I had been planning to be back for Easter 2020, but we know how that worked out. I’m usually quite content with my own company, but these last 12+ months have been trying. Last time I saw any member of my family in the US or overseas was January 2020. I will say we’re all in much more frequent contact these days with calls, texts, FaceTime, Zoom, even writing letters - but it’s not the same. I do have a group of friends I am close with here, and while we do a daily “check-in”, I do miss being with them. I have been socialising with a smaller group of friends for the last 6 or so months now. But again, with the restrictions, and things still shut down, it’s not the same. I really get angry when I think of what COVID has robbed us all of - that which is most precious, time. Anywho, if things go tits-up with the London sojourn, I’m still scheduled to be in Moscow for work in late November. I’ve only been a handful of times, and never really hired off RM - one gent who was based in Moscow I had met previously in Dubai, and another was a regular from London - but looking at RM, no one is striking my fancy. Ugh! I think I’m just in the middle of a COVID malaise these days, which will hopefully pass once I get the second jab next week. I anticipate my summer 2021 excursions to find me going no further afield than the beaches of the Northeast. How I’d love to make up for last summer with a few trips overseas, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to be feasible. I cannot wait for these restrictions to end, to return to some normalcy, and to host a mask burning party to which all are invited!

I actually have the same phone as in #85 - perhaps once I begin “entertaining” gentlemen callers again, I should have one pose like this handsome fellow.

I agree - it really is a fantastic experience! Unfortunately the museum itself is in some very serious financial difficulties resulting from Covid. I believe they’ve laid off something like 80% of staff, with remaining staff taking significant pay cuts. I’d be very sad if this museum became a victim of Covid and shut down altogether.

I think he’s stunning - tall, well built, body hair, handsome, possessing a delicious looking posterior, and, while not much of an issue for me (not a sizeist, but do love a large, loose sack), a very blessed young man downstairs. Unfortunately, he’ll be in and out of NYC before I’ve had my second jab, otherwise I’d be looking to get a different type of jab or two from him! Ah well - hoping he’ll be back soon enough. If anyone meets with him, gains any experience, I’d be eager to hear. FWIW I don’t think “professional pics” in and of themselves are red flags. In fairness, what may appear to be a “professional pic”, may just be the result of skill. Younger friends, family members are so adept at taking pics, you’d swear they were professional snaps.

Yes, after chatting with my mate, what I thought was an option on RM appears to have once been a type of search option on Rentboy. I’m chalking it up to me having a brain fart today.

I am the first to admit I am *far* from tech savvy, so I turn to you far more savvy types for guidance. As one cannot save a pic from RM, i am going to guess a screen shot won’t work. I do remember some kind soul on here posted how one can save the image address to use for the reverse image search. Of course, no joy finding that post. May I ask if one of you kind gents can help out with either instructions or the link to that post? Thanks!! BBD

Not a provider, but back in the salad days of youth, before cell phones, or much chatter online beyond maybe AOL chat rooms, there was a police officer well known in Central Park. He was one of the mounted patrol. I would guess he was mid to late 30’s to my 25 years. He wasn’t one to bust gents engaged in the bushes or anything, rather he’d stop those he liked, strike up a conversation, and using some old school code, made it clear he was interested. My 25 year rugby jock self apparently caught his eye, and I was able to enjoy his charms both in the Park, as well as my place or his. In my memory, he remains a devastatingly handsome Italian-American - I hope that isn’t just memory painting a more flattering picture than reality. Beyond PO Hottie, I’ve enjoyed the company of other NYPD officers, a few FDNY, a member of the London Fire Brigade, some Broadway and West End actors, a couple of seminarians, multiple soldiers (US, UK, German, Israeli), politicians, aristos, and a minor European royal. If I can pull these fellows, I’ve no doubt our much appreciated providers are pulling many, many more.

I may very well be mistaken - a friend who also enjoys this hobby responded to my text with the same question. He is sure RM never had such a search function, but he does remember the old Rentboy having a similar search function. That memory, plus not having really searched on RM in over a year may have contributed to my confusion.

I mentioned in another thread that my travel for work in a hopefully PostCovid world beginning in late Fall 2021 is both fairly aggressive, and bringing me to two cities overseas I’m not very familiar with. While I haven’t engaged in our shared hobby lo these many (MANY!) months, with my second shot next week, I’m thinking it may be time to clear out the cobwebs. I’ve been browsing RM for some local gents, as well as getting an idea of the lay of the land where I’m scheduled to be traveling to. My question is - wasn’t there a way to search RM based on the types of gents the provider likes? I know they can check off some types under their “I Am Into” section, but I don’t usually use what’s listed there as disqualifying if say, in my case, “bear” or “daddy” is not checked. I could have sworn there was an option to search specifically for the types of clients (ie; bears, older/mature, jock/muscle, younger/twink, etc.) the provider liked/preferred. Am I thinking of another site? Or am I just wrong? Thanks! BBD

I used to enjoy taking visitors around, showing them the sites whether in NYC or when I’m overseas. Now, I’m more likely to buy them an A-Z Guide and send them on their way. But, if they want to do museums or more off the beaten path types of things, I still enjoy going on those. If I’m on my own, I really enjoy just going out walking, exploring - and if I get lost, I find a pub and call a taxi. I also like doing something cultural and unique to the place I’m in - sumo practice in Tokyo, theatre in London, music in NYC, etc.. One fun evening in Hong Kong was seeing the Chieftains perform with a Classical Chinese musical ensemble. NYC Overrated - Empire State Building, Times Square, Macy’s Herald Square Underrated - Explorers Club, Green Wood Cemetery or Old Calvary Cemetery, The Strand Philadelphia Overrated - The Liberty Bell Underrated - Japanese House & Garden London Overrated - Harrod’s, London Eye, Changing of the Guard Underrated - Highgate Cemetery, Wallace Collection, Tea Dances at the Waldorf, meal at White’s or Brook’s Dublin Overrated - Guinness Brewery, Grafton Street Underrated - Irish Jewish Museum, Oratory of the Sacred Heart, Little Museum of Dublin, Gravedigger’s Pub, Confession Box pub, a meal at Stephen’s Green Hibernian Club Hong Kong Underrated - The Jade Market, a meal at The Hong Kong Club Sydney Underrated - Art Gallery of NSW, The Lord Nelson, Bondi or Manly Beach (yes, probably overrated but the sights one sees can never be over appreciated)

Growing up, there were always pieces of furniture, decorative objects, china, jewelry, etc. that were referred to by the person it came from -ie; “Uncle Victor’s desk”, “Aunt Mamie’s china”, “Granny Isabelle’s pearls”. We knew they came down thru previous generations as heirlooms, and were not to go outside the family. There were also some pieces that didn’t get quite the reverence they deserved. I’m thinking specifically of a large silver bowl that was always on the table in my paternal grandparents foyer, then my mother’s. It was always referred to as “Paul” as in “I left the keys in Paul” or “I put your mail in/by Paul”. As we had a 2x great uncle Paul, I always thought it came thru him. It was only after my mother passed, I discovered it was actually an original piece of Revere silver. Probably not the best place to be dropping keys, yet that’s what I’m still using it for. When my mother passed a few years ago, it was somewhat daunting going thru, sorting everything. My siblings took the items they wanted, yet there was so much left. I have a good friend who worked at Sotheby’s who came to my mother’s to go thru things with me. I was surprised that some of the jewelry my sister didn’t take were much older than I had thought (mid 1700’s thru early 1800’s), and that the stones were real. A big surprise was a knife that has been used as a letter opener for decades is actually a piece of Georgian silver - it still sits on my desk to use opening letters. There was also a good amount of militaria that comes thru my father’s side. Swords, helmets, medals, hats, a couple of uniforms, trench art, etc. with some pieces going back hundreds of years. Between the china, silver, jewelry, furniture, militaria, etc., my friend dated the oldest piece to about 1500 (which fit family lore), with other bits covering the next 500 years. I have some in my place, with the bulk in storage. I can’t bring myself to sell it all, but I’m sure after I’m gathered to my forebears that is what my family will do.

I highly recommend it! I’d also recommend sorting out a Medical Proxy, and a POA. If you’re single and/or not close (emotionally or geographically) to your family, I cannot emphasise how important it is to have someone you know and trust, who knows what you want, to have the authority to make medical decisions for you if you cannot. Same when it comes to paying bills, and such when you cannot. Of course, all this should go hand in glove with drafting a Will. Yes, it is pretty cool knowing someone for 45 years who is gay too. There have been a few funny moments thru the years where we’ve shared stories only to find out the other had either been there already, or the other had no idea a mutual friend enjoyed m2m time on occasion. With this hobby, we also share recommendations of certain providers we’ve enjoyed. We’ve joked about winding up moving in together in our declining years, and scandalising the neighbours with our younger, hunky visitors! ?

I just recently settled my arrangements for when my time comes, which I hope is not for many decades ??I’ve had a number of deaths this past year, tho none from Covid, and I kept hearing “I hope this is what he/she wanted” from the bereaved. As a single man, I realised I better sort out what I want to save the headache when I’m gone. The arrangements are with the same family owned funeral home here in NYC that’s been handling the wakes, and funerals for my family for over 110 years. Picked out my casket, memorial cards, type of wake, songs and readings for the funeral, where I’m to be buried, etc.. I’ll be waked there, funeral mass at our family church, and burial in my father’s family plot - there’s four or five generations there, and I’ll be the last one to be gathered to my forebears. My oldest friend (we met in kindergarten!) is also my lawyer, and now executor (as well as an enthusiast of the hobby we all share here), and he has all the details, as well as who will be pallbearers, do the readings, eulogy, what I’ll wear, what to bury with me, and most importantly, he’s to make sure there is a big luncheon after all the rites are concluded with a full open bar. It may not be a pleasant task - planning one’s funeral - but as we get older, and especially if you’re single, it is something that has to be done.

@TruthBTold - wearing glasses or not, the rest of him will always do quite nicely! *swoon*

http://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/193004/slide_193004_399564_free.jpg Found him!

I wear glasses for distance, but alas look nothing like this men...le sigh Not a one in the lot I'd toss out of bed for eating crackers -- tho I may have to hide their glasses to get them in my bed in the first place #'s 1 and 19 are particular favs. Does anyone in NYC member a few years ago they did a calendar for NY Public Libraries of "The Men in the Stacks" or something like that? It was, as you expect, a sexy calendar a la FDNY or Dieux de Stade. There was this one dude, librarian, glasses, hot bod, hair in the right places and amounts and I knew him from rugby. If I can find the pic, I'll post. He hid his candy dish behind a book and lets just say there was a very valid reason it was a large book!

I echo the sentiments that this guy is smoking hot! Who is going to take the plunge and report back? lol Thanks for the link @azdr0710 - pity he only stuck around on SC for a solo, bet he's hot in action.

I'd agree with that -- except when it comes to the younger guy killing the older guy like in this situation. I think that SeanCody model who got caught up in the Donald Burns mess got railroaded -- why wasn't Burns charged with transporting these guys across state lines and paying them for sex? Oh that's right, he has money and influence. Based on my own observations of "May-December" relationships I've come across, there have been a few where the older fellow with the money was clearly a control freak and viewed the younger guy as the trophy, the possession vs. as a partner. Sad.

I think your conflating "sexuality/orientation" and "sexual acts" here @MrMiniver - two entirely different subjects. For the first - sexuality/orientation - as has already been pointed out, one can be open and casual about it in the work place - both gay and straight. I don't think TR or anyone else is waving rainbow flags and throwing glitter about the office, but the examples given show how one can casually be open about one's sexuality. Would you disagree with how they were answered? Also, if you cannot imagine people talking about the other subject - sex - in the workplace, come down to financial district in NYC. The graphic descriptions of sexual encounters I have overheard or been told directly (ugh!) would make Larry Flynt blush. Inappropriate - sure, but it happens -- in the office, at the bar with colleagues -- I don't necessarily want to hear it but I also don't want to be pegged as the prude. I avoid when I can and when I can't - I grin and bear it and somebody usually steers the conversation away from the subject at hand. It is what it is and I don't know an office where it doesn't happen.

Generation X here and yes, I do get hit on by younger guys - tho I admit, I'm always thinking "am I reading this right?" worried I've gotten the wrong end of the stick. Believe it or not, I can be pretty clueless about picking up on intent with the mens. I also have found that when I'm all suited n' booted, the hits tend to happen more. What can I say, when you're a man of a certain stature, a well cut suit and shirt can hide a multitude of sins! It is an ego boost for sure but as was said in that little video - I can't really build much with someone I have nothing in common with and/or who can't pay for dinner. There are of course exceptions here, but as a rule I'm not one of the eldergays at the bar cruising the young ones, not that there's anything wrong with that, just not for this bear. I like Mr Miniver's and Truereview's comments - and agree completely.