Becket

Best one ever. Answer: SIS BOOM BA Question: What is the sound of an exploding sheep? Watched old Johnny Carson reruns tonight. He did Carnak the Magnificent skit, where he is given the answer and "divines" the question. Answer. Oil of Olay Question. What do you use to deep fry a bull fighter? 🤣

Watched old Johnny Carson reruns tonight. He did Carnak the Magnificent skit, where he is given the answer and "divines" the question. Answer. Oil of Olay Question. What do you use to deep fry a bull fighter? 🤣

Lordy they are all so pretty.

I was getting ready to go to college one summer when my dad sticks his head into my room and says, "Hey, you don't need to know anything, do you? OK. Great." He was so embarrassed about having to bring up the topic, but seemingly duty bound to "check off that box." At the time I just rolled my eyes. But looking back it was incredibly funny in its awkwardness.

I think so. Looks a little different than what I remember. But the reviews match up. Great looking dude in any case.

Whoops! Political postings. Ball gags for the lot.

A very perfect response to all those members (myself included) who try to sneak it political commentary from time to time. I am here warned, because that the LAST item I ever want stuffed into my mouth.

What did the jar of pickles say to his therapist? I have a hard time opening up.

I'm just hoping the entire state power grid doesn't go belly up like it did a few years ago when we had an icy week. (Though it will give ole "Cancun Ted" Cruz another excuse to fly off to the tropics again.) Whoops, sorry, borderline political talk. Guess I'm skating on thin ice here.

Congratulations, @relax man. You're my first personal attack on this fine site! And we do frown upon insults and rudeness around here. But hey, you'll get remembered for something. Nasty, huh? Haven't been called that since I was nine years old and the maid saw that I tried to touch our German Shepherd's nut sack. But, to be fair, ole Rex sure did have a great pair of low hangers. Lazy? Guilty as charged. I love nothing more than to lay on the table and let the massage boy do all the work. What do I offer in the experience? O yea, money. Excuse oneself and go to the bathroom to fart? Well, can't say I've ever done that, whether naked or fully dressed; at a football game or in church. What, no left cheek sneaks allowed in your clan? I can't see myself taking on this habit. Geez, I'd be running back and forth to the bathroom all day long! You take my tale (or tail) too seriously methinks. This thread asked for "experiences or funny stories." I thought the whole thing was hilarious. My needing to fart on the table. Telling the guy I need to fart (instead of just letting it rip). And then him having a hissy fit at the thought of one of his clients ever needing to pass gas. It was an amusing moment, nothing more. Where you took it; insults, telling off, having the nerve....., acting like you've been wronged perhaps might have been a bit of an overreaction. (Kinda like my massage guy acted.) But that was my point. So let's all smile, lighten up, and help one another get through the day. No sense in being mean and insulting, unless of course that's all you know how to be.

Was in a frat. Could have done without the hazing, but the parties and dances were great fun. It's fun as a sophomore, but by my senior year I was wondering what the point was.

Great thread @Lucky181. Great give and take with all these posters. I wish more providers would introduce themselves as did you. You sound very friendly and welcoming. Hope you have great success.

Thanks. I actually have that exact pan. I'll give it a shot. Your bread is gorgeous; I'm so jealous.

I've been trying to make sourdough bread. Ordered some good starter from the King Arthur baking company. But my results have been kinda MEH! Any bread bakers among the brethren? I need some tips.

Best massage in FLL, IMHO, is Johnnny. He's from Brazil and speaks perfect English. Plus he is very handsome, very willing, and a whole lot of fun.

Recently I laid down on the table of a good looking muscle guy for a nice massage. About fifteen minutes in my stomach rumbled and I suddenly needed to fart. So I said, "Hey I need to fart, OK?" The response was something like, "OMG GO TO THE BATHROOM. HURRY!" It wasn't like I was gonna take a dump on his mother's oriental. I just needed to pass gas, then get back to the massage. His frantic response killed the mood so I just laid there and said I'm ok now. A few minutes later I said that was enough, thank you; got dressed, paid, and walked out the door. Weird experience all around.

Off topic I know. But I remember having a probably unhealthy obsession of my own in college with the blond stud muffin guy in my frat. Nothing to the level of these two movies, but I would take any opportunity to be around the guy. We became friendly, if not friends. Once, to my great surprise, we ended up walking together alone through a wooded area of my college town. He jumped up an embankment, then became a little worried about how he was gonna get down. I looked up at those dreamy blue eyes and replied, "Don't worry, I'll catch you." He then jumped down and, for a brief moment, was in my arms. My left hand had caught him at his navel, and I remember lingering there as long as I dared on that glorious treasure trail. The moment was over and that was that. But the memory of that brief touch stayed with me for years.

Many say Saltburn reminds them of The Talented Mr. Ripley. I loved them both.

I'd be scared to death. Damn car drives with no driver? It's the work of the devil.

I really liked Saltburn. So many twists and turns. And Jacob Elordi is gorgeous.

MOM!!! Don't come in right now. I'm doing my homework.

Hey guys, why am I now getting these letters and numbers in the link? I click on it and nothing happens. This is new. Anyone know? (I couldn't figure out how to make this quote end up in a PM to the administrators to ask them.) If you know how to do that as well, lemme know. Thanks.

Suits me just fine. I appreciate the provider making the effort for me of being more sure of his ability to perform. Besides, chemistry between two guys is always a big issue. Perhaps he's really not into me and needs a little extra help to make my experience better. Great, no problem. Doesn't hurt my feelings and really shouldn't hurt yours.

Anything with a Glen in front of it. Glenfiddich. Glenlivet. Glenmorangie.

andy_cooks. Australian guy. He hollers out, "Babe, what do you want for lunch?" She replies, then he whips it up. You get a fast forward 20 second presentation. It's really cute.