DMonDude

I've had providers in the past who i was seeing on a regular basis while his RM profile was inactive. I had his number so i would just text him or he would text me about meeting up. I asked him about why his profile was expired/frozen and he said he was prioritizing other sites at the time. He has a rotation of sites he spends the subscription money on and isn't using them all actively at once. I've also known providers to sometimes take breaks from fielding new clients and just focus on their regulars. A frozen/inactive profile is only really an issue or a "don't engage" for potential new clients, in my experience. So if you already have met with the guy and have his number, it doesn't hurt anything to text and see if he's available. If he's available he'll be willing to set something up and if he's actually not available he'll either tell you that as well or he just won't reply.

No one is saying you HAVE to pay the deposit, again, what i'm saying is don't be an asshole just because some providers do charge one. Providers ask for them to get some kind of peace of mind that the client is serious about the meet, not because they think they're hot shit, the latter of which is the general consensus here in this thread and is the attitude i'm calling out. I literally never said anywhere we clients HAVE to pay the deposit. That's the disconnect. I'm very specifically talking about the "gasp, how DARE a provider have the GALL to ask for a deposit" as if providers have no legitimate reason to ask for one, attitude on display in the thread.

I don't think comparisons to other businesses are really that apt in this particular topic. It's an unregulated/not legal profession (for most of us, i know not everyone here is American) that is unlike literally any other profession. There are no legal protections for either the client or the provider and legal protections are what set the expectations you refer to for other industries. So it's up to us as individuals to decide how to treat each other and many here choose catty-ness and apathy. It's not surprising that customers want to be treated like valued customers and we overwhelmingly are, but I'm just saying the "until proven otherwise" bit has already happened to everyone including the providers and a lot of clients completely lack understanding or empathy for this. Some clients are coming at providers with the other expectation that htey already know you're "one of the good ones" and the provider doesn't have any way to actually know that about you. And many here's attitude is basically "tough shit, i don't care, you still owe me good service regardless". By your own logic, sure don't pay the deposit or whatever, but don't be surprised when the provider then doesn't give you the assumption of being a good client because they have been burned by other clients who have no relation to you just the same as many clients have deposit/upfront pay horror stories. That again is the grander thing i'm getting at here. Clients are the ones going much farther in treating providers with a certain negativity based on the actions of a few than providers are here. Even so, the clients are here acting like you are owed this and that and that's weird because when providers voice their own grievances from the other perspective they're met with the catty-ness within this thread of how "oh wow you think you're so cute you get to ask for a deposit" over something that some providers do as a safety or vetting precaution, which is understandable, if one has empathy for the provider. It's just ugly attitude for no real reason that disproportionately comes from clients.

You're welcome! It's generally recommended here that when we come here with a name to request info on to search the name first. It'll pull up threads mentioning that name and you can reply to that thread and it'll bring the thread back up to the top of the forum. Or sometimes the moderators will merge the threads together.

There's a grander issue of bad clients who have given providers bad experiences. Leading them to do things like ask the client for photos or to ask for a deposit as some kind of guarantee the client is legit. And for clients who are good clients this is seen as some affront to their goal of being provided service by the provider. Which leads to many of you having these pithy catty comments about providers because of a lack of empathy for providers. As evidenced by others here saying they should suck it up and deal with because it's part of the job (which isn't true and isn't inherently how it has to be). And conversely there are providers who have conned or scammed clients, by running with deposit money or given bad performance after receiving deposit or upfront pay, which leads to clients being highly skeptical of upfront asks by the good providers. The bad eggs on both sides have ruined it for the good eggs on both sides, and there's no solution to it other than everyone just operating as they please individually. As has also been said here and elsewhere. But i do think it's interesting how the assumed good clients here are still so quick to have all these catty comments while providers are still expected to speak of clients as politely as possible even in criticism or explaining their own instances of being wronged by clients.

There are a couple threads on him here

There's a thread on him here:

This is personally something i don't really care about as much as others here do. I've been asked for deposits before and it's never once been a problem, I'm aware I'm the outlier there compared to others here who have obviously been burned by providers asking for deposits. If the providers profile seems fairly legit and the deposit is low enough i've had no issue paying it. I've never had a provider i paid a deposit to not show up or give a lackluster performance after. There are plenty of other context clues to take into account that can let you know if paying the deposit is going to result in you getting scammed/no showed or not. Same stuff many here have suggested in other threads about how to gauge provider quality/legitness. That's just been my experience though.

Not saying you should do it. But on OF i have asked a guy if he was on RM before. I specifically just called it "RM" and assumed if he was using it he'd know the abbreviation. Then the guy responded and clarified and said "oh the esc0rt site?" (OF DMs block certain words like escort but it's easy to change a letter and get around it). He knew of it but he wasn't on it. It didn't cause any OF moderation issues for either of us. But that was like 2 years ago. I'd say X would probably be the next best place to try to contact him. That's probably the next most likely place he checks DMs most frequently to field collab inquiries from other content creators since many content creators do the bulk of their advertising on X since it's adult content friendly.

Azdr0710's got you covered with intro to hiring topics. Here's a recommendation. I'm not in New York but this New York guy has come to my city a bunch in the past and he's great. So he's my one go to recommendation/hire for NY guys. Just let him know what you're interested in doing and that you're new at this and he'll take good care of you. https://rent.men/BenjaminMilliano

I'm curious. What do you feel like you gain from being able to see if they've read your message or not and how do you act/respond after you see they've read it and how long after they've read the message do you then act that way? Anyone who's ever asked me to have my read receipts on whether for social reasons or business/transaction reasons has only ever wanted it on so they can freak out on me if i don't immediately drop everything I'm doing and respond to them within some arbitrary amount of time they've deemed reasonable, but i didn't agree to or confirm with them. Without any thought to what else i may have going on. It's always been a "i am owed your attention" and trying to police my time thing to them. I personally don't see many if any other logical reason anyone would want/need read receipts on other than that, largely because anything you need that urgent a response for you should just call them and if they don't answer that just confirms they are not available. But if one exists i'd be fascinated to hear it.

So @JockdudeP, you didn't want an answer to your question. You just wanted someone to agree with you about wanting Read Receipts on. Got it.

You pretty much got it, yeah. The "second wall" or "second hole" is actually the 90 degree right angle bend your rectum takes going to your sigmoid colon. What we perceive to be a tight second "hole" being entered is that 90 degree angle straightening out (due to the muscles around that area relaxing) as a long dick, arm, or other objects enter it. It's also why people refer to sex sometimes as "getting your guts re-arranged" lol. That is technically what is happening inside. Relaxing the "second hole" muscles requires a deeper relaxation because the muscles around that area are involuntary muscles, meaning you can't consciously control them like you can your anus/sphincter.

I find this annoying too, the ambiguity of that info field. I'm the opposite though, I'm cool with weed and/or a little bit of vaping but i can't handle guys who smoke cigs/cigars (no judgement, just probably not gonna kiss you lol). I actually don't even really like vaping either, but so many guys my age and younger do it I've had to learn to deal with it a little bit. I generally really hate vape/cigarette/cigar breath but i can handle vape breath if it's minimal. But also yeah the younger you go the more likely it is any kind of "yes" to smoking usually means vapes or weed instead of cigs/cigars. Millennials and Gen Z almost universally don't smoke cigs/cigars. The whole no smoking campaign and accompanying laws in the U.S. in the 90s and 2000's was pretty effective on us. But yeah "big tobacco" got Gen Z in particular on the vaping big time in it's place. Tinder actually specifically lists Cannabis use and cigarette smoking as two separate things you can say yes/no to and every other app or website along these lines all should copy that. They should even go the next step and have a vaping designation too. Though that's a bit easier to lump in with cigs/cigars because it's just a different vessel for nicotine.

"Seoul Dinero" on TikTok/Instagram.