Himposium

Marylander1940, I’d like to offer some insight. If you believe that paying a male escort gives you the right to treat him with disregard, that mindset reflects deeper psychological patterns. The entitlement you’ve expressed often stems from internal struggles with control, self-worth, and the capacity for intimacy. Using money as a justification to strip someone of respect is a defense mechanism—a way to avoid vulnerability. It creates a false sense of power, but beneath that surface is unresolved shame, fear of closeness, and likely a conflict around your own sexual identity. What you’re doing is projecting your discomfort onto the very person you’re paying to connect with. Payment doesn’t erase the human element. In fact, it heightens the need for mutual respect and emotional intelligence. A truly balanced mind understands that. You may want to explore this further—because this behavior is a sign that help is needed.

From my perspective, it’s not uncommon for people to experience discomfort when encountering beliefs or affiliations that differ from their own—especially in today’s polarized climate. However, what stands out in this interaction is a phenomenon called cognitive rigidity—a reduced ability to tolerate ambiguity or opposing views without perceiving them as a threat. The individual may also be experiencing a form of black-and-white thinking, a cognitive distortion where people or actions are viewed as entirely good or entirely bad, depending on a single characteristic like political alignment. This makes it difficult to appreciate nuance—such as a provider’s professionalism or kindness, independent of their beliefs. Additionally, their accusation that you were ‘attacking’ them after calmly quoting a guideline and offering a neutral perspective could reflect projection—displacing their own discomfort or inner conflict onto you. When someone’s worldview is challenged, even gently, it can feel threatening if they haven’t developed internal tools for navigating differing opinions. This situation also touches on identity fusion, where a person’s political identity becomes so central to their sense of self that it bleeds into unrelated decisions, like hiring a massage therapist or leaving a positive review. That level of entanglement can inhibit personal growth and reduce openness to beneficial, non-political experiences. Your response modeled emotional maturity and boundary-setting: you stayed within the community guidelines, responded without judgment, and affirmed values like professionalism and open-mindedness. That the person responded with a sense of being 'attacked' is more telling about their emotional landscape than your words. In short, this isn't just about politics—it's about anxiety, perceived threat, and an inability to tolerate difference. And that, more than any affiliation, is what needs compassionate understanding and, sometimes, therapeutic exploration.

Hey everyone, I wanted to take a moment to share something I came across while exploring platforms that feature male masseurs. One well-known site, RentMen, asked for my government-issued ID just to view profiles. That didn’t sit well with me. I understand that ID verification is sometimes required for posting services—that makes sense for accountability and safety. But to simply browse content? That felt excessive, and frankly, unnecessary. For anyone considering using platforms like this, here are a few things to keep in mind: Your ID contains sensitive information (name, date of birth, license/ID numbers). Once uploaded, you’re trusting the platform to store and protect that data securely. Not all sites have strong privacy protections. Data breaches are real. Even well-known companies have been hacked. If a site’s policy isn’t transparent about how long they keep your info or what they do with it, that's a red flag. There are alternative platforms that allow you to browse or connect without giving up your identity. In an era where privacy matters, we shouldn’t feel pressured to hand over personal documents just to explore. For these reasons, I’ve chosen to opt out of using any site that demands my ID for viewing access. I believe in exploring with curiosity—but also caution. Just wanted to put this on your radar in case it helps someone else make an informed decision. Stay safe out there.

Thank you, Sniper, for keeping this a gentleman’s conversation. When I said "here," I was referring to the U.S.—I can see how that may have come across differently. That’s on me for not being clearer.

Ah, a data collector, I see—down to the point five percent! Impressive. Trust the man with spreadsheets on rent boys. My apologies for disturbing your pre-coffee, pre-bowel-movement routine. May your morning scroll be smooth, your judgments sharp, and your fiber intake sufficient. Have a glorious day!

Responding to LookingAround — The rules we’re expected to follow here in the U.S. are absurd. Masseurs should be licensed and allowed to offer escort services if they choose. Instead, the attractive men providing our massages are forced to operate in the shadows to offer anything beyond a rub. We celebrate gay pride every year, yet where is that same energy when it comes to standing up for masseurs who also choose to be escorts? It’s because too many people here are cowards—quick to shame sex workers while secretly drooling over who to book next.

I’ve been meaning to book him myself—such a beautiful man.

You’ve got my like—relax, man! You’re absolutely right. Honestly, I find it fascinating when people show unkindness in reviews or, in this case, on a message board. I’m actually developing a lecture based on what I’ve seen here. If you’re interested in hearing it, feel free to reach out. I plan to have it up on my YouTube channel within the week.

I regularly see three masseurs who aren’t licensed, and I’ve had nothing but great experiences. Why? Because I curate the session by speaking up about what I want and where I need the work. Just lying there in silence and then leaving a lukewarm review? That’s on the client, not the masseur. If your masseur is working your calves or thighs—let them. And when they hit the perfect rhythm, like playing the fiddle just right, say something. Tell them, “Keep doing that, I love it.” Don’t let them move on until you’re ready. That’s just common sense—and no license can substitute for clear communication. I see a lot of hate directed at masseurs here, but honestly, most of it comes from clients who don’t speak up. From the masseur’s side, they’re considering things like whether you’re on blood thinners, if you bruise easily, or if going deep into your glutes might trigger a sciatic flare-up. Bottom line: if you want a great massage, be present and vocal throughout the session. That’s how you get exactly what you came for.

I’ve actually hired a few guys named JD over the years, but yes—I’ve had the pleasure of meeting this JD. First met him in Chicago, before he relocated to Naperville. Honestly had no idea he did adult work until recently, so thanks for the heads-up. I’ll definitely be checking out some of that earlier content. I’ve known JD since he started offering massage back in 2009. These days, I’m subscribed to both his romantic massage stories and his OnlyFans. His work—whether it’s massage, storytelling, or adult content—is always thoughtful, well-crafted, and genuine. And each time we connect, the conversations are just as meaningful as the experience itself. I’m not sharing his website here. Too many of you are clearly bitter that he’s denied you access, and it shows. As a clinical psychologist, I can’t help but notice the abandonment issues bleeding through your comments. Waving around cash doesn’t entitle you to connection. He and I have had long talks about this kind of behavior. If you’re genuinely curious and respectful, feel free to reach out to me directly for his site info. But for the rest of you? You don’t deserve access to someone I consider a friend.

I hired him once while passing through a city he was visiting, and I thought he did a wonderful job. I’m not someone who seeks all the extras, but to criticize someone’s ability to connect on a carnal level—without even showing yourself—raises questions about your own appearance and hygiene. Connection between two people is personal and unique; it can’t be bought or expected.

Yes, I met with Jesse and he did a great job. He was respectful, grounded, and intuitive with his touch. He's a sweet man!