Km411

I fall for providers one hour at a time 😉 

I respectfully disagree. As a client, I don’t perceive it as a provider’s responsibility to regulate my emotions, only to set his boundaries (for him, not me). I’m responsible for me. Of course, there are extreme situations but I don’t believe that’s what @ICTJOCKwas describing.

@Km411 When I saw your 1st post, saying that you would never be able to write about it (coming out), I felt so sad. Then I kept reading postings and scrolling through and there was @Km411 sharing his story! That made me so happy! Like the sun shining from behind a cloud. 
I’m grateful to EVERYONE who has added to this conversation. 
At 29 years of age (I am 61 now) I decided “F**k it!” and made the decision to stop changing my pronouns. I didn’t feel it necessary to make an announcement, I simply started using “he” and “him” and saying “my boyfriend”. And no one batted an eye. Probably because, behind my back, everyone was saying, “For God’s sake! Doesn’t Mike know he’s GAY?” 🤣  My parents dealt with - and accepted -  “the issue” long before I did. To this day I have never said “I’m gay” to my parents. Why overstate the obvious? 🤣 Everyone’s path is different and although I was tortured and tormented in junior high and high school (and in Church youth groups no less) I really didn’t have it so bad. Of course, the alcohol helped but THAT is a subject for another thread. 
As an aside, a moment of revelation occurred when, at 50, I took my 23 year-old boyfriend to Palm Springs for the 1st time. We went to VillageFest where it was over-populated by same-sex couples holding hands. The BF grabbed my hand and, due to my age and experience, I reflexively pulled my hand away. He got very upset. “You CAN’T refuse to hold my hand. We’re safe here.” Amazing how times change. At 50 I still felt the need to be discreet and careful, but a 23 year-old had no such compunction. He wanted to hold hands with his boyfriend. (We are no longer together but I will ALWAYS remember that moment.) He had his own issues being gay in a family of Jehovah’s Witnesses, but it’s not my place to tell his story. 

Maybe I can write about this. I knew I was Bi from a young age, but there was no word for it then (or at least not one known to me); you were gay or straight. And gay was unacceptable.
My first experience with a boy was age 10 (might have been younger). He was several years older. (Given the age difference and that I was prepubescent, some might say I was abused. I wasn’t.) We played together for over a decade. At the same time, I was attracted to girls and dated throughout high school and college.
Without a word for this dual attraction, I was very confused about my identity. And same-sex attraction was unacceptable in my family and broader community. So I very literally lived two separate lives. This duality was the trauma.
Eventually, my relationship with this boy ended, I completed college, and I made the decision to live a “normal” life. I married, raised a family, and never looked back. 
Then, without any foreshadowing, my son “came out” as Bi. He was very proud of his identity and fully embraced it, and I was very proud that he could do so without inhibition. But it was also a moment of truth for me.
By this time my wife and I were living apart much of the time—still married and committed to each other, but each pursuing our own interests. So, about two years ago I decided to re-explore my physical attraction to men. This hobby was the perfect solution; I could do so on my own terms.
I’ve not “come out” (except in a limited way to my son and a close friend); it would hurt to many people. Long ago I made a choice, and I’ve decided to live by it. Yes, a duality persists, but now it’s intentional and I’m at peace.
I’m not one to entertain regret, but I do wish the word for my identity had been known to me when it mattered most. I imagine I might have lived one identity more openly, maybe similar to @pubic_assistance. But, we meander through life, share our experiences, and gain a broader understanding of ourselves and the human experience. I’m pleased to be a small part of that, and all is well.

As the parent of a Bi son I can say that is what I care most about.

This might be off topic, but I figure Sniffies confessions might be appropriate here. I recently met up with a guy on Sniffies. He was very complimentary of me and we had a hot session. Afterward, he asked if I’d see him again (even suggested becoming a regular). But the thing is he didn’t finish. Was it me or him?
Well, on my drive home from his place, he messages me on the app with his photo. I couldn’t tell if he knew he was messaging me, so I ask if he’s looking, to which he responds “yes.” Now he knows my profile pics well enough and he just saw me in person, but has no idea I’m the guy with whom he just spent an hour.
So, it was me lol.
Delete.

I don’t know if my mom smoked while she was pregnant, but she smoked in the car with the window barely cracked for most of my childhood. She wondered why I always got car sick. I loved her, but damn.

How many licks does it take? 😂 
Seriously, from this discussion it appears there could be many variables: (1) self-identification, (2) physical attraction, (3) frequency, (4) deportment, (5) sexual activity, (6) emotional attraction, (6) perception. And there are others not alluded to here, e.g., anatomical features. I default to self-identification because do we really need more stratifications in our society?

Me, too; sorry to hear he left the forum.

Aren’t sexual identity “labels” so last century?

Me too!
@BenjaminNicholas is an honest contributor! 

Me, too; sorry to hear he left the forum.

Me, too; sorry to hear he left the forum.

Let’s be clear, it’s not acetaminophen that causes autism, it’s Tylenol. Why only Tylenol? Because he has a grudge against the CEO of the manufacturer (and because he can’t pronounce acetaminophen) 😆 

And the best part—no concessions other than “discussions”. Why? Because they were WRONG (and grossly misjudged the situation). The vast majority of Americans, including BTC and BSR, value free speech. This means valuing speech we disagree with. Indeed, those in power today owe it to free speech; they could never have overcome the abuses of the PC/cancel culture dynamics without it. Say what you need to, win over others in the marketplace of ideas, but don’t get lazy and suppress. The ends never justify the means. Never.

How many licks does it take? 😂 
Seriously, from this discussion it appears there could be many variables: (1) self-identification, (2) physical attraction, (3) frequency, (4) deportment, (5) sexual activity, (6) emotional attraction, (6) perception. And there are others not alluded to here, e.g., anatomical features. I default to self-identification because do we really need more stratifications in our society?

How many licks does it take? 😂 
Seriously, from this discussion it appears there could be many variables: (1) self-identification, (2) physical attraction, (3) frequency, (4) deportment, (5) sexual activity, (6) emotional attraction, (6) perception. And there are others not alluded to here, e.g., anatomical features. I default to self-identification because do we really need more stratifications in our society?

The only question about orientation I’ve ever been asked was whether I was a top or a bottom 😀

I don’t know if my mom smoked while she was pregnant, but she smoked in the car with the window barely cracked for most of my childhood. She wondered why I always got car sick. I loved her, but damn.

Let’s be clear, it’s not acetaminophen that causes autism, it’s Tylenol. Why only Tylenol? Because he has a grudge against the CEO of the manufacturer (and because he can’t pronounce acetaminophen) 😆 

Never seen a provider with such a wide variety of comments. He's the devil incarnate. Or he is the Escort star of the century. A very odd thing, indeed. 
Note: It strikes me as just very......sad.....that @Walt sums up his experience on this site concluding "all providers are scam artists."  I won't argue; if that's your experience then so be it. But I'm at a loss for words...........Damn!

And the best part—no concessions other than “discussions”. Why? Because they were WRONG (and grossly misjudged the situation). The vast majority of Americans, including BTC and BSR, value free speech. This means valuing speech we disagree with. Indeed, those in power today owe it to free speech; they could never have overcome the abuses of the PC/cancel culture dynamics without it. Say what you need to, win over others in the marketplace of ideas, but don’t get lazy and suppress. The ends never justify the means. Never.

And the best part—no concessions other than “discussions”. Why? Because they were WRONG (and grossly misjudged the situation). The vast majority of Americans, including BTC and BSR, value free speech. This means valuing speech we disagree with. Indeed, those in power today owe it to free speech; they could never have overcome the abuses of the PC/cancel culture dynamics without it. Say what you need to, win over others in the marketplace of ideas, but don’t get lazy and suppress. The ends never justify the means. Never.

Tylenol’s official label in 2017 did not tell pregnant women “do not use” Tylenol, it said pregnant or breastfeeding women should ask a health professional before use.
The social media post you refer to was not a change to the product label and, per the company, was in fact taken out of context. Their labeling has been consistent. And it remains the safest among alternatives.
You’re free to take medical guidance from social media; I’ll stick with FDA-vetted and approved warning labels pre-dating the current administration.

Tylenol’s official label in 2017 did not tell pregnant women “do not use” Tylenol, it said pregnant or breastfeeding women should ask a health professional before use.
The social media post you refer to was not a change to the product label and, per the company, was in fact taken out of context. Their labeling has been consistent. And it remains the safest among alternatives.
You’re free to take medical guidance from social media; I’ll stick with FDA-vetted and approved warning labels pre-dating the current administration.