Mocha

Fair enough. I appreciate your willingness to network, and I think we need more providers like you. It would make for a happier place. But understand what I’m saying, my friend. I’m not saying I CHOOSE not to give/accept referrals. I never said that. I simply gave an example of the LATEST person to ask me for a referral. I also gave an example of why I wouldn’t, because just like you said: And that’s what I told the other person, and that’s what I usually tell everyone. I’m just elaborating on why, which I usually don’t in my response. I don’t know anyone who I would recommend to a client. It’s easy to talk about networking and sticking together, but my experiences have specifically shown me otherwise that not everyone operates with that mentality. I can name HUNDREDS of times where people have shown me you can’t cast your pearls among swine. There was an escort in Denver who I had seen at all places: THE BARBERSHOP. He was just leaving the barbershop, so I couldn’t strike up a convo with him. Later that day I texted him. He responded, and then I introduced myself and mentioned I was also at the barbershop at the time. No response. EVER. So why in the fuck would I be giving referrals to someone who can’t even acknowledge me, let alone return a message? Also, did you not see that episode of I believe on Hot Bench: This White lady masseur sold her “client list” to a Black lady Masseur, thinking she would make all this money. Her business never took off, and most of the referred clients never booked her. The court also ruled that she wasn’t able to recover the $10,000 she paid for the list. There’s really nothing to argue here. If someone wants to refer, by all means go ahead. But I don’t think it’s a requirement. I also ask each time someone contacts me where they found my ad, most times it’s not escort referrals. There’s also the clients who will show me other escorts ads, and say they were gonna hire them but they hired me. I don’t shit talk the other escort, I just be like...well I’m glad you hit me up. I don’t try to sway them from seeing the person. Or I’ll say, I know of them, but I’ve never met them personally. But I wouldn’t give referrals unless I had personally done a scene with the person previously. In those cases I would. But many American gay guys out here are fake, two-faced and phony and more interested in maintaining their image and self absorbed, to be trusted with my client list. Maybe if I lived in a different country, it’s be different.

Idk, I usually agree with ya, but on this one I differ. I feel there’s two sides to it that doesn’t involve being “possessive”. How do we know if the escort would be interested in taking on said client? What if the rates of the other escort differed from the original escort, and the client requested to price match and the escort got offended? What if a particular escort doesn’t see (insert race) of said client? Also, there’s tact and then there’s tacKY. For example: a client in a particular city who I’ve not seen in years hit me up after seeing my rentmen ad posted up. Only thing, I'm not due to the area until next month. He usually would be on Craigslist and would only see me every so often. Like months in between time. He was sweet, but his approaches would come off tacky. Always asking for a discount, then overstaying. So when he followed up with me asking if I knew any friends to refer him until I get there, I was like: First off I haven’t been to said city in months, and I also don’t associate with the escorts there. Plus I know he likes black escorts which there aren’t many there, and the times I did come across black escorts there, there wasn’t much in the way of camaraderie to where I would be putting my mother f*cking money in their pockets. Guaranteed they wouldn't do it for me either. So in that case, I was utmost taken aback and simply said...NO, I DONT. And I also would turn the question around: how many clients would consent to us asking them if they know any friends, when they decide to quit hiring, get into a relationship or move away? See how THAT conversation would go lol. (Which doesn’t include reviews which are a recommendation of its own, but it’s an indirect recommendation, not a personal one). That conversation would likely go nowhere because, some clients erroneously believe we as escorts don't carry the same "turn on/turn off switch" as they do. As if we're always "on". Kind of like one client who was begging me to bring over some of my "friends", non of whom were interested in being involved in the business. How about he bring some of HIS friends so I can get paid more money. Dudes have to understand just because we're escorts, that doesn't mean we ALL have limitless capabilities. We can't just snap our fingers like power rangers and have guys for backup, or have guys on the side of the ring ready to tag team like WWE.

Oh of course, hell no. And in Florida, you don't want to live someplace shitty because it'll likely be frequented with roaches or police activity. That's part of what I liked about out west and north: you could stay at a low budget hotel for the night, but never worry about bugs. The thing about "temporarily" living places, is it can depend. It's not as easy as it sounds. Temporary places can add up. I did temporarily live in Phoenix from November to January this year. But by the time January came around, I was more than ready to leave. But that was the perk: when I was ready to leave, I left and didn't have to stick around and deal with the bullshit of having to endure having only 1 client every few days. I can just leave and go to the next location where I'm more in demand. Versus being stuck in a town where people want to show their ass and get on my last, when they start being idiotic and make setting up appointments a thing of great annoyance.

I just hate the idea of having to move someplace else and start all over again. Whenever I do get a place, atleast I’ll have everything ready. But I’m still “undeclared” on where to next settle and at this point I don’t think it’s anywhere. Half of me is tied to one state, the other half is trying to set up in another. But whenever I consider trying to settle back in Florida, I get this feeling over me that it’s just not where I want to be. I’m trying so hard to “want” to settle in Florida, but how can I when I have to deal with 10 people faking like they want appointments, before I even get 1. What’s going to happen if I get a place here (which I likely won’t). I’ll have to go back to regular work and most likely I wont have enough time to stay in the business and deal with the same fucking shit after a long day of work.

Hey there, thanks. Yeah that is true. I’ve spent the weekend looking through listings, and most everything is $900+ in Orlando area. The places that are lower are basically dumps about an hour outside of town. And it goes back to what I was saying: why would I want to get into debt renting anywhere in Florida, when half the time, the requests I get for appointments are bullshit, bullshit, bullshit and trying to get them to follow thru is like herding cats. I’m almost contemplating to just give away most of my things in storage I’ve acquired to consignment and just living out of hotels and air bnb spots and just go city to city and only come home to relatives every couple of months. I’m just having a hard time finding apartments, and it seems I only make the amount of clients I’m happy with, when I’m traveling state to state.

As a traveling escort who sometimes happen upon many “if I lived here, we’d be together” guys, I know the feeling. Those usually last a weekend or week. It’s hard because you know the days are limited. As for the original post, the speed of time in gay and straight relationships are polar opposites. A 2 week relationship is all too common in the gay scene. You could *think* you’re dating a guy, he may introduce you to his friends a couple of times, and then after 1 or 2 dates, stop answering texts and invites for dates. Most men I meet outside of escorting usually never lead to a 2nd or 3rd date/encounter, etc. Most these guys are addicted to the new, the unattached, the samples, the conquest, the validation. I used to get twisted about it, and sometimes still do to an extent. But the other day I saw one of those “ghost” mother foes out at the club the other night. I stood a few feet away and even though I impulsively wanted to walk up and say hi, in my mind I was just like: F that mother foe. I just pretended like I didn’t even recognize him.

I know I should not even take such things personally. At the same time, a lot of people brush it off without realizing, things can be better, if they do better. I am happy to report that, despite the previous nights fuckery, the next morning I had completely made up for it. 30 minutes before checkout time. And it's mutual we will be trying to meet again. I should have known. It's just they sounded so cordial and didn't pick up anything weird over the messages and leading up to meeting. I didn't pick up indication that they were doing that stuff. But then as soon as I got close up on them, I could hear the dreaded clinching of teeth. But I should have known because there was no real direction. It was just, come over there's 3 of us wanting to do a group, but no mention of who's doing what. I walk in and there's porn on. I think, based on the fact that they weren't already doing anything when I walked in (or maybe they'd already done it 3 or 4 times beforehand, who knows)...idk if they even wanted to do anything sexual. Those kinda sessions usually involve a lot of laying around jerking spaghetti dicks, tweaking, watch more movies until they fall asleep at 8 in the morning. A4A is certainly a class of its own, however being it's not as easily accessible as Grindr is...I find it somewhat limits the level of F-ery going on. But a4ais known to me, for lots of talk but no walk. Think I met my first SERIOUS client on there last week since I got back to Florida the day after Father's Day. At the same time, the results of a4a can vary significantly depending on location. I went to Indy last month and only stayed 1 night but managed to meet 2 clients up for a session. That's a place where I normally don't have luck in. But I think this removal of craigslist has helped steer people to better functioning sites. In Florida, you think someone is booking, then they don't come through. Unless it's someone who has a good rapport with. It also looks that Grindr itself may be dealing with fighting for its app privileges: https://money.cnn.com/2017/04/14/technology/grindr-lawsuit/index.html

I'm sure it's no surprise to some. How many times have you gone over to meet a fling late at night expecting a hookup, only to arrive to a tweak Fest? how many times have we as escorts either had clients discuss their meetings on Grindr, or hear the dreaded app sound go off in the middle or end of session? Well clearly, "some" of our clients are using these apps...and I believe, sometimes can make these guy possess a Grindr mentality. My definition of Grindr mentality is: FLAKY Fast Lust Always Keeps Yearning https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2018/4/4/17177058/grindr-gay-men-mental-health-psychiatrist

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Whether or not one is religious/spiritual doesn’t matter. It’s the message behind the phrase that matters. Of course, this does not assume the escort the OP mentioned isn’t their actual selves either. Innocent until PROVEN otherwise.

Owning for now is out of the equation. I have friends and have come across people who’ve owned homes, and either they bought it together with someone (and then broke up) or they were fortunate to have a relative who passed down a home to them, thus acquiring it thru the family. Or they had the right helping hand getting into it. It’d be great if buying a home was like buying a car. Cars depreciate. Homes not so much. Neighbors are a concern, but you know...most straight white people (I only say because they happened to have been my neighbors for about 5 years) have no idea about our “lifestyle”. If I was a woman, that would make it more obvious. But as a guy, they are oblivious. I lived in a weird setup where each condominium corridor had only 1 flight of stairs and 2 neighboring doors. So if the neighbors were leaving and the client was coming up, they would be forced to run into each other. I out-stayed 2 young white couples, 2 years each. However, part of me did feel like they might have had some reservations about unknown guys popping up to my place at random. I couldn’t tell if they moved because of not having central air, or because of the occasional traffic. At the same time, that’s why all places I’ve lived...I deal with neighbors sparingly and cordially. I hung out with some briefly and would small talk here and there, but no deep conversations and discussions that didn’t pertain to them. That’s the other reason for my increase pickiness when choosing a place. Trying to blend privacy, affordability, and convenience all in one and not pay $1,000 a month for it.

I've been house hunting wanting to get back to setting up home base incall location. Unfortunately, just keep coming up with no leads. The obstacles standing in the way are 3 fold. Part of the issue lies with the costs to get into (and maintain) a place, then finding one that's comfortable and has all the amenities I want. I've grown away from the efficiencies/mother in law suites, and being inconvenienced due to lacking the amenities I need. I’m in a shared 3/2 home with a yard and garage, but being it’s not my own...I still don’t feel at home. The main part of the equation is making sure that the level of business stays to where it needs to be. In my area, seems most appointments are outcalls to hotels and resorts. I've hosted on several occasions sometimes for 2 or 3 days in a row, but would only get a client or 2 who were already scheduled. I'm actually saving money by not having a place to host, because I rarely get serious incall requests in this area, to make it worth investing money on an incall location. Unless on the off chance, getting a place will gradually build up a local base. With the way these guys carry on, I can't see that happening though. Not to mention, it's also seeming that many "by owner" units are being rented out on air bnb nowadays. Stuff that could be livable, are now replaced with air bnb. I'm sure supplementing with porn/massage helps, and I've posted up on different massage sites, but haven't seen big differences to where I’d want to make a move and settle here yet. Just meeting guys regularly, it’s very rare to find a guy who lives on his own, who isn’t working 2 or 3 jobs. I already know 2 friends paying $1,000 a month for 1 bedroom run of the mill apartments. Places built in the 80s and 90s, old appliances, going for $1,000 a month. That’s not being condescending, but just an example of how much it costs to rent a place within 10 miles from the downtown of some cities. Even if they do have the funds to afford the place, I see their diet and nutrition and it’s usually living out of microwaveables and fast food. The ones who are doing a bit better, usually have 2 or 3 other roommates or ex boyfriend living with them, etc. If anyone is living solo and can maintain it mainly from client appointments, please share! I’ve always had my own place up until last year, and since then...it’s been a uphill battle to get back into another.

I think it's a case of letting the escort bring it up first. E.g., "I'm not available next weekend, but my partner in crime by the name of....is. Here's his rentmen ID." Based on past experiences, I find its better to leave the picking to the client to someone of his choosing, preferably who I don't know. There's been times I've even included "friends" at the request of a client, and only 1 time did it go well...and even then, it made things tense for a couple days between the friend and I, since I was handling all the financials of it. Recently, I almost talked 2 friends (non-escorts) into doing a session at a client's request, but even if the session goes well...sometimes there's 1 person who has to take on the lingering "aftertaste" of setting up such encounters. Which usually ends up being me.

...Despite the fact that most of the abusers of meth happen to be guys who look like YOU. You should apply to be forum umpire, since you’re always running side by side. One thing for sure, I don’t have to listen to someone who can’t even abide by the rules of this forum e.g. no arguments/no war. Okay, so are y’all 2 detaining me, or am I free to go without this thread continuing? Or do I need to request it closed?

Bitch, asshole? No...I just didn’t kiss up to your fucking ass. You came at me wrong, I said something...then I apologized. Like a real man would do. Yet, You are continuously keeping up the drama. There was already 2 threads closed, you do something silly like post the email correspondence between you and twitter. You are MESSY! I could be even messier and contact twitter about how you’re using their correspondence to shit talk me. See what they think about that.

What city is this in?

I had leave some friends the other day, during pride fest. However, it kinda happened during an intermission period where the older day crowd transitioned to the younger, drunker evening crowd, around 5-6 pm. In that case I was able to break away, even though otherwise it would have been improper since I had parked a ways away and had my friend drive me back. Plus the client only lived like 0.5 miles away from the action. I will say it’s harder to break away from friends when I have to host, versus client hosting. But generally...I don’t like to break away from friends if I’m out doing specific plans. I’ve had friends get upset or part ways because of it. It’s not that they don’t understand, but it can annoying. I only do it if it’s A) been a slow week and B) whatever me and friends are doing, isn’t something formal: like a wedding. We also agree beforehand, that if something comes up...I may need to take it.

Well aren’t you just a poor sport. Ole trifling, vindictive ass mother fucker at that. You really think that’s making you look like the better person? It makes you look petty, jealous, and dramatic. Not a good look. Non of my clients have complained about my list, but then you want to be some kind of twitter patrol and go tattle telling. I’ll know better than to trust saying anything around you. And guess what? My twitter account is still up. I’ll just switch it up so YOU don’t have to know about it. Man to man: you’re 29. Younger than me. You live in Austin. Shouldn’t you get out, get some sun, go to the beach, plant a tree, do something worthwhile with your time rather than keeping up animosity and finding ways to get at me? I’ve never even met you, I’ve never had anything against you. I used to even like you. But you’re looking like another racist Texan with some kind of vendetta towards me, over something that’s non of your business.

Yeah, LA is a bag of mixed nuts. My first trip, I had 2 clients the first night. I thought I was going to be the male version of Heidi Fleiss in no time. Sadly, I didn’t see anyone else for the rest of the trip. And one of the guys from this forum flaked on me, but I won’t mention him by name. San Francisco has become more competitive over the years also. But it’s a different crowd there, which to me makes it easier than LA. The high density (something like 18,000+ people per square mile), it being a modern and historic gay destination, and the fact that it’s centered around Silicone Valley and ports. I’ve not been to SF since it’s founded craigslist has shutdown. But I’ll say one thing, EVERY city is going to operate differently now. I’m noticing even cities that I didn’t like going to, are actually busier than before. It’s still unfortunate what happened, but when you compare one line newspaper ads to Rentmen.com...guys can’t help but to cross over.

That’s pretty much how ya have to do it. If you’re unsure, I personally like to have a “final” destination (which may just be the destination for that week), and then stop in places along the way. Just be careful not to spend the money you need in your destination, along the way. For example, I drove from East Coast City to a Midwest City as my final destination, back around Memorial Day weekend. I wanted to stop in a couple cities along the way. I was doing good, but then I messed up by staying in one of the cities I didn’t plan to stop in too long (two days) because I was so comfortable in the hotel I was in, and needed to rest. It threw things off, and I ended up having to skip the other city I wanted to spend the night in, and then when I passed thru Chicago, I stayed way out in suburbia because it was late and wanted to save $$. Plus the hurricane from Florida had made its way all the way up to Indiana, and I had to wait several hours for it to pass. Also, thinking is a state of mind. I had a guy say to me, “when I think a trip is going to be great and I’m feeling good about it, I always make sooooooo much money.” Braggarts. But I’ve also not felt good about trips and had them go well, and I’ve also been optimistic about trips, and have them go to shit. Its all about what’s going on, when and where.

Actually I changed my mind. Since no other escorts have really given any responses, I’ll just go ahead and say what I believe, based on real world experience. Basically, there’s really no “best places” for escorts, atleast not when speaking generally. One has to find the place that they like, what works for them in terms of ease of getting around, climate they prefer, and what that city has to offer. Someone may say, “Chicago is the best place.” Another may say LA is the best place. Then another may say Charlotte, NC. All 3 areas are very different in terms of weather, things to do, and how to get around. Even if you travel for several days, obviously it’s not possible to hit every market. So therefore, you will have to decide which place looks reasonable for you to go based on research. Many people starting out, assume going to the cities with the most escorts will be the best places for escorts. That may not always be the case though. However, sometimes it’s hard to tell. I rarely ever hit anything in Chicago, but I’ve had success in Minneapolis. I usually leave disappointed in Los Angeles, but have done better in San Francisco. Then there’s time where a city will be profitable, but a production to work out of. For example: San Francisco and Washington DC both carry the dilemma: do I want to pay a premium to stay in the city limits (plus costs of parking), or do I want to stay on the outside of town, and save money but at the possibility of not being able to reach clients quickly, or traversing across bridges multiple times throughout the stay. Some areas are seasonal and can may vary at which times are good to go.

Fair enough. I misinterpreted. I was trying to avoid creating a new thread, but guess it kind of sidetracked things. As someone who has traveled most of the contiguous U.S., I’d love to give some better/additional input...but according to “someone”, my opinions on the forum don’t matter. So, I’ll keep all the secrets to myself for now on.

The fact that you insist playing hierarchal high school games (queen, really?) just goes to show you’d rather keep up animosity, than to make peace. Which proves my point. Especially after I was man enough to come forward and tried to truce.

Of course. I’ve nothing against you. We’ve had our spats, but ultimately I don’t. But I could say that line to several people. Including the one who posted above you...

Well...again not to imply you were referring to driving. But I just gave the example as an overall, general thing. For anyone on any highway anywhere. You don’t even need to use drugs, but that won’t stop some a**h*** cop from wasting an hour of your time interrogating/looking for something that doesn’t exist. I was almost late for an appointment which was over an hours drive away, over that bullshit. I’ve already found a LGBT friendly attorney who’s going to examine it and perhaps consider looking into something. So if I retire early, y’all will know why. For all we know, the OP could be doing bus or train. Though I haven’t rode in either in awhile, for all I know they could be doing random searches as well.