Strafe13

Same here. I forgot to update this thread. I met Ivo about a week or two after we first chatted about meeting. He's a total gentleman and made for lovely company.

I’m glad you had a good time with Stephen. He does look like a dreamboat! Perhaps one day I’ll find out for myself. I love a happy ending like this. It’s what this forum is supposed to be all about.

Please don't ruin this teachable moment by getting defensive and hurling insults. There isn't a single thing you've pointed to that shows or even suggests that I've accused anyone in this thread of being an outright intentional racist. This is oh so typical in discourse on racism in this country nowadays. When people of color try to engage seriously on the subject of racism, we're met with claims that racism is rare or doesn't really exist, and/or we get gaslit by the dismissal and minimizing of the things that our lived individual and collective experiences tell us might be red flags. Or, the cherry on top, is when we get accused of being the real racists for calling out potential (or actual) racism. All of us on this thread and in this forum can, and should, do better. Multiple members of color in this thread have pointed out how this "right to select with whom I do business," as exemplified here by an escort's request for client photos, triggers our proverbial "spider sense" as to racially discriminatory or other invidious motives. There is a strong historical basis for that intuitive feeling, as this has been, and continues to be, the rhetorical response from those who have opposed (and continue to oppose) prohibiting discrimination in public accommodations and employment. Places that used to refuse service to black people also used to proudly include Jews and the Irish on those same signs, by invoking the same right. Like it or not, this is our history and it informs the present. The main difference in the modern day is that folks hide the bigotry when they invoke that right. By analogy, the queer community deals with this now with certain vendors saying they don't want to serve us, all the while telling anyone who'll listen that it's not because they're anti-queer. More often than not, if we're hearing pleas that something "doesn't make you racist (or queerphobic, or antisemitic, or ableist, etc.)," then we're at the point where it's time to critically reflect on whether said thing is really so innocuous or if our unconscious biases may be influencing it. I'm sorry that you interpreted that as accusing others, whomever they may be. It was meant to challenge all of us to do the hard work and not just rest on our comfortable beliefs that we would never do anything racist, or that things we've long thought of as just fine might actually be problematic. I include myself in the "us," so there was no avoidance of looking in the proverbial mirror.

You still ignored the other parts of that very paragraph from which you quoted, where I explained how I was not generalizing. The part about you was one of multiple examples. Read in isolation I could see how you made that mistake. But I still wouldn’t question your intelligence for it.

I’ve gotten a few $400/hour quotes from some providers, only one of whom was a well-reviewed guy who could, IMHO, legitimately ask for that. But I’m getting $350/hour more often than not, starting last fall. So that seems to be the new norm, with some providers slightly below (at $300 or $325/hr) and some slightly above (at $400/hr).

Reading is fundamental, sir. In the same portion of my sentence that you quoted, I specifically said that I wasn’t saying that you were doing this. Interestingly, you left that part out when you quoted me. You also ignored the qualification I placed at the end of that sentence too. Why would I have included those qualifiers if I intended to paint with a wide brush, as you say? I also explained why, based on my own experience with Kai, I did not believe that his requests for pics from prospective clients presented as a cover for racial discrimination. If I wanted to paint with a wide brush, why would I have offered that type of individualized assessment of Kai’s approach? It’s also a lot more than that this “can be true.” There’s long, sordid history of folks invoking the right to be selective so as to justify or excuse discriminatory practices. Does that mean that this is true all of the time? Of course not, and I never said that . But it’s not some rare, isolated phenomenon, as your word choice appears to imply. Nor is it “absurd” for people of color in this country, and black people especially, to not give the benefit of the doubt to those who expose a, how do I put this diplomatically, less than inclusive and welcoming business model. Given the historical and cultural backdrop, one could argue that it’s at least a bit naive to be surprised or shocked that some people would legitimately question the true motives for such a rationale. If not naïve, then it’s least somewhat indicative of a cultural blind spot. And can we please retire this phraseology about something not making one a racist? There’s nothing on this earth that magically *makes* someone a racist. While proudly racist people will do racist things, not everything they do will necessarily be racist. But to a certain extent, we’re all the products of this society and culture, and that means we carry all kinds of implicit biases and subconscious beliefs that manifest in all kinds of ways. Hence, most of us can, and often do, act in racist ways without even being consciously aware of it or intending to do so. Sometimes that manifests in our ideas about being “selective” about who we’ll do business or associate with, who we find attractive or qualified for certain roles and positions, the types of traits that are acceptable when displayed by certain people as compared to others, what we define as professional, etc. It’s a deep complicated issue that requires a lot of critical introspection and soul-searching.

I’m not saying @pubic_assistance does this, but the rationale he expresses (that business owners should be able to refuse service to whomever they want for pretty much any reason) has been, in my experience and as borne by America’s history, a cover for discrimination in public accommodations. While there’s obviously no empirical evidence, it’s my firm belief that many escorts hue to this same mentality and use the request for stats and/or pics as a means of filtering out members of those demographics against whom they wish to discriminate. Like others have said here, I’ve also had providers go silent once my race or color has been revealed. Heck, it happens in regular hookups all the time. The LGBTQ community is just as bigoted as any other demographic group. Conversely, it’s no more bigoted than any other group. Racism, sexism, queerphobia, white supremacy, Christian supremacy, and various similar ills are endemic in our society, so I’m never surprised when and where they manifest. All the above being said, I don’t know whether this provider Kai requests pics from prospective clients so he can practice racial or other discrimination. But I doubt it, and here’s why. Kai and i never met, but we messaged back and forth within the past 2 months or so, when i tried to set up a meeting (it didn’t come to fruition). Kai asked for pics and stats from me, but since my race is indicated in my rentmen profile name, which I’d shared in my initial message to him, I suspect that his request, which came later, had less to do with race/color/ethnicity than with some other trait for which he’s screening. Ultimately, we didn’t meet because the vibe felt off even though he seemed to be less rigid with the photo request. But if screening me based on race was the objective, he could’ve just ignored me when I disclosed my profile name in my intro message. So I guess that something else is going on there. Some providers request pics, rather than stats, and in discussions they revealed that it’s a safety measure. Be that as it may, it doesn’t surprise me that they could be clueless as to how that might be perceived by others as potentially indicative of racial or other discriminatory animus.

I had a good initial exchange with BryanGrove, and decided to hire him. He was unavailable when I tried to see him in NYC right before the long MLK weekend. I went out of town that weekend (I’d told him about the trip), but I reached out to him the following week after I got back, but he never responded. Curious business strategy, to say the least, especially since he’d only been on rentmen for about 7 or 8 days when I first contacted him.

I concur. FunNicolasny didn’t respond to my text inquiry either, so I gave up.

I also saw those new pictures and they rekindled my interest in Stephen a little bit. But the most recent post in this thread about an experience with Stephen was made by @ChasingGirth just this past Thursday, a mere 5 days ago, which I found to be rather detailed and helpful. Unless you suspect that Chasing was describing an old encounter, I don’t think you can ask for better responses from the forum. I’ve never seen Stephen in-person, but I’ve reached out to him more than once in the past in attempts to schedule an appointment. Each time he didn’t even bother to respond to my texts. Based on what I’ve read in this thread, it doesn’t seem like a great loss, despite his gorgeous eyes, solid build, broad shoulders, and plump, kissable lips. *sigh* 💔

To follow up @Asterisk’s post, it looks like Bruno has removed his phone number from his rentmen ad, even though it still says to text him.🤦‍♂️. He’d been in his native Brazil for an extended period over the holidays, during which time his ad listed him as unavailable. Maybe Bruno inadvertently clicked the field to remove his number when he changed his ad back to the available status?

I forgot to ask whether you hired TallDudeNYC in NYC, as per his stage name, or elsewhere, as his ad presently shows him visiting other locales. I find this guy to be really handsome but all of his pictures are G-rated. Given his lack of reviews and refusal to show the goods, I was too hesitant to reach out. Based on your experience with TallDude, is the lack of revealing photos a cause for concern?

Glad you had a good experience. I was going to hire http://rent.men/Brady_g, who’s even more green. I’m intrigued, and he was polite and articulate in his response to my inquiry, but he also quoted a $400 hourly rate, which is well above the $300 pre-pandemic norm in NYC, as well as the $350 rate that seems to be emerging as we ease into the 4th year. I’ve paid that much only once and that was for a really well known escort with stellar reviews on RM and from many members of this forum, and I had a great time. So I’m not absolutely opposed to paying what feels, to me, like a premium rate, for someone who’s established and proven. But for such a new provider, with no reviews, I found that to be too much. (Did I mention that he’s only been on rentmen for 3 days?) I politely told Brady that his rate was beyond what I’m accustomed to, and I wished him well. I’m not usually one for negotiating, particularly in this field, but I guess this is how the free market works, right? The rate gets set by what consumers (in the aggregate) are willing to pay, and it remains to be seen if the standard NYC rate will rise now to $400/hour and whether just any provider can command it or only established ones.

I saw this charlatan a few years ago when I visited Las Vegas, @Chidude. Total hustler who arrived at my hotel scammed me out of money, then blocked me on rentmen so I couldn’t leave a review to warn other clients. And the reason he has so many sterling reviews, @azdr0710 is because he pressures clients to leave him reviews before they’ve even seen him. I alerted the rentmen administration to this guy, including his scheme to rig the review system in this manner, but they refused to do anything about it. But karma is a train that’s never late, as I later found out from this very board that he was the Vegas escort arrested in a scheme to extort another client who called law enforcement nonetheless. I never learned the outcome of the case but that’s besides the point.

Wow! What a find! I don’t know anything about this guy, but I’d sure like to experience some time with him on my next trip to Southern California.

This provider has reached out to me on rentmen. I don’t recall looking at his ad before although I certainly might have done so. I don’t typically mind unsolicited messages from providers who’ve seen that I checked out their ad. But he’s also sent me multiple photos, which is kind of new. He’s got 6 reviews on rentmen, but I take those with a grain of salt. Curious if anyone has a similar experience, or is this a new way of marketing?

I can understand why a provider refuses to provide additional pics. Since no one here seems to have a personal experience with Vithorio, you might want to consider reaching out to some of his reviewers on rentmen. I get frequent queries like that from clients who are interested in escorts I’ve reviewed, and I usually respond. Maybe you’ll get lucky and one or more of those 11 reviewers will give you some more info about him. Alternatively, since you said his rate is reasonable, you might want to consider taking a leap of faith and hire Vithorio for a simple 1-hour session. If he’s good, then you’ve lucked out, but if it’s lackluster, then you haven’t lost anything more than what you’ve already described as a reasonable fee. By the way, what is Vithorio’s rate? If it’s below these higher inflation-induced rates we’ve been discussing all over the board for most of this year, then I’d say go for it! Fortune favors the bold, right?

Sorry, haven’t met him. But we did speak last week about meeting. We had tentative plans to meet on Wednesday night, but he changed them (with PLENTY of notice, so no problem) because Argentina had advanced in the World Cup and was playing that night. As some of you may know, Argentina continued to advance and eventually won the World Cup on Sunday, so I never reached back out to reschedule, thinking he’d be preoccupied with cheering on his nation with his fellow countrymen in the city. But Ivo was very nice during our communications, so I’m willing to try again, maybe after the holidays.

I had a great time with Tanus last night. His photos are accurate, and I found him to be handsome and very sweet. I wish I’d booked a longer session, but I stuck to my usual rule of only 1-hour appointments for first-time hires. He’s in town from Connecticut, but he plans on visiting NYC more frequently, since he lives only about an hour away. I just may hire him again before he leaves in a few days.

I’m seeing Tanus tonight. I’ll report back, and hopefully it’ll be a positive experience.

I feel terrible for Mr. Hazen’s partner, family, and other loved ones. I’d always wanted to meet him and I was rooting hard for his recovery. I know that people like to keep certain things private, but in a situation like this, where an otherwise healthy, young man in prime physical condition suddenly takes ill while on vacation and loses his life, it begs the question as to whether other members of the community should be on the lookout for any potential dangers. That’s the only way I can see any potential silver lining to this tragedy.

I’m not sure how else to interpret @mistrmikey’s comments, unless you suspect that he’s relaying someone else’s experience, but there’s nothing in his post to even suggest that. It’s definitely encouraging that a forum member has apparently seen this provider and can provide positive feedback.

My quick Google Maps search for a New Paradise Men’s Spa in Manhattan provided an address of 346 West 53rd Street, between 8th and 9th Avenues, near the Hell’s Kitchen neighborhood. Is the 435 5th Avenue address for a second location, or has the business moved?

I’m not saying whether this guy is fake or real, and I know nothing about this Argentinian environmentalist @Reisr30 mentioned. (Although if that’s what environmentalists look like in Argentina, I need to book a flight to Buenos Aires and plant some trees right now!). But the fact that he lists only English and French as his spoken languages doesn’t strike me as weird or suspicious, since his ad is posted in Montreal. Seems reasonable to let the prospective clients know that he speaks the 2 official languages of the region, don’t you think? Assuming he’s an Argentine (which I suspect based on including “Buenos” in his stage name), the omission of Spanish might just be that he thinks it’s not likely to be of interest or relevant to the Québécois he expects will be his likely clientele. Or, if he thinks people already know who he is, then he might have thought that including Spanish would be redundant or obvious. Just playing Devil’s advocate. But yeah, I hope he’s real too. If the environmentalist was visiting the U.S. last week, it’s not improbable that he might have just gone to Montreal too, since Canada makes entering from the U.S. a relatively painless experience (as least in comparison to what the U.S. CBP makes people go through). Could be worth a weekend drive up to our northern neighbor 😉

I agree that this guy is really handsome. He’d been based in Michigan before, so when I saw him in NYC, I asked him to open his private photos. The automatic reply from rent men provided a rate of $350/hour. I’m seeing a lot of providers ask for that now, although the typical rate for NYC has been $300/hr for the past several years, albeit that was pre-pandemic induced inflation. This isn’t meant to restart rare discussions. But for a relatively new provider, who doesn’t have legit porn star name recognition or a history as one of the best escorts so as to command premium rates, seeing that gave me pause. Now that I’ve seen from you that he rushes sessions, I think I made the right decision.