Zapped

This is all the more reason why a burner phone is a good investment for clients. I bought mine with cash and reload it with prepaid cards I buy with cash. This burner doesn’t have anything that connects it to me.

In my young nerdy/twinky days, I was at a performing arts school and got a crush on a dancer with the most perfect body ever. To my surprise, he was attracted to me. My first boyfriend! And he was the least sexually adventurous of anyone I ever slept with, I think. After a couple of weeks we lost interest in each other. (Not surprising for college kids I now realize.)
 
In the intervening years, I occasionally hooked up with someone with an “ideal” muscular body. Almost always a dud in bed. (When I got older and into muscle worship, that didn’t matter so much.)
 
In my 30s and 40s when I was in decent shape and semi-popular at bathhouses, I got the most amazing blow jobs from older, often quite heavy guys.
 
I was never an escort, but as a guy who had sex a lot, I can say I had a blast with guys with all sorts of bodies, including old and fat ones.
 
Meanwhile, whatever karma I built up in those earlier decades seems to be paying off in my 50s and now 60s.

If only I wasn’t 60 and overweight! I don’t think there’s much of a market, even among daddy lovers, for my body type!

Great reading... It helped me understand where the industry is going and how some of the guys we see are making a living. Thanks @Zapped.

Very interesting, thank you for posting this @Zapped

NYTimes article on OnlyFans:
 
They Fixed Pornography
https://nyti.ms/2UOmRiL?smid=nytcore-ios-share

NYTimes article on OnlyFans:
 
They Fixed Pornography
https://nyti.ms/2UOmRiL?smid=nytcore-ios-share

NYTimes article on OnlyFans:
 
They Fixed Pornography
https://nyti.ms/2UOmRiL?smid=nytcore-ios-share

A different twist on this...I once hired a guy in Orlando that I was very much looking forward to being with. Lots of anticipation and, in retrospect, also a few red flags. When he arrived at my hotel, he sat on the edge of one bed and I sat across from him on the other bed while he went on about his family, life in Tennessee, Christmas gifts he bought for his parents, his boyfriend who really wants him to bottom and on and on. I made subtle advances by touching his knee, taking his hand, etc. to move toward some intimacy. This went on for about twenty minutes before things got started.
 
We ended at an hour with more talking at the end. I take an active part in managing time and always move to the side of the escort if we go over...in other words round up if there is any doubt of time. But this seemed unfair and I had a difficult time moving things along. I thought about saying something like ‘you have an interesting story but I’d like to move on ‘ but wasn’t sure that was the right approach. This one left me a bit dumbfounded. Of course, the opposite is always interesting too when my pants are taken down before the door closes!

How about setting up a playlist with 60 minutes of mood music or silence followed by this?
 

 
 
Even better, there's an app for that.
 
https://www.fastcompany.com/3042731/finally-an-app-that-lets-you-play-off-rambling-coworkers-like-oscar-acceptance-speeches
 


Finally, An App That Lets You “Play Off” Rambling Coworkers Like Oscar Acceptance Speeches





BY JOE BERKOWITZ1 MINUTE READ


There is no graceful way to tell someone to stop talking in most situations. Award shows, however, do not have that problem. When that wrap-it-up overture starts swelling while you’re still on stage, it means it’s time to thank your mom and your spouse and call it a night. And it works, too. Even the most heroically defiant speech-maker at this year’s Oscars, Best Foreign Language Film director Pawel Pawlikowski, only lasted 45 seconds after the music started (though it seemed more like a half-hour). If only there was a way to harness this powerful efficiency tool into your social and professional life! Whoops, there already is.
 


Agency Rethink has just rolled out a new app that recreates the award show play-off music, placing it right inside your phone. “You’re Cut Off”tells anybody who has gone on too long that it’s time to do a dismount. Whether it’s a conversation that seems inescapable, a boring presentation that is getting Groundhog Day-level repetitive, or maybe even a quarterly state of the union address from the CEO if you’re truly bold, this app says everything you need to say for you. A word of warning, though, this app will be a well-received and tolerated office gag precisely one time per person it’s used upon, so make it count!
 
http://rethinkcanada.com/timesup/index.html

By the way, I finally read the review that started this whole thread. It sounds like the reviewer thought he was being polite listening to the guy talk, and the escort assumed the client just wanted the company and was planning to and.or should pay for it.
 
Differing unspoken expectations of each other. Which is why it is always best to make expectations clear.
 
I once hired an escort for an hour and we agreed to keep the option open for a second hour. Our time together was enjoyable, but it was clear he wasn't that into me sexually. We both came before the first hour was up. As we got to the one-hour mark, he was lying in my arms rather sleepily and it was clear we weren't going to have a round 2. So I mentioned to him the hour was about up. He said, "oh I thought you wanted the second hour," and I said no, and he said OK, and was happy and eager to get back to his boyfriend.
 
Now it's entirely possible that had I been lonelier and more financially comfortable I'd have wanted to pay for an additional hour of cuddling/sleeping. But I wasn't particularly lonely and the money was a bit of a stretch. And I can see why he would have assumed I wanted him to stay, since I hadn't said anything to the contrary, and why I might have been happy to pay for "his time" and body contact.
 
I actually thought he was asleep. He was, I think, pretending to be asleep, and, having already come, probably not looking forward to the second hour but willing to do his best for the money. Had I been "nice" and let him sleep, which occurred to me, then he probably would have wanted to be paid. As I'm writing, it's coming back to me that he pretty much jumped out of bed once it was clear I didn't want to pay for another hour.
 
Getting expectations explicit is very helpful! I started having less tension with my husband when I realized I was upset with him for not meeting expectations I hadn't made explicit. Turns out he's not a mind reader. And he's from Asia, and there are some very different cultural expectations. A topic for another time. . . .

That’s good—you got me!
 
Well, look, I love my students and I like talking with them. And one has to set boundaries. Just as therapists and other professionals do. So I guess I put that while in too snarky a mood.
 
If someone’s in a real crisis, I’m there for them as long as they need to talk and I direct them to the professional counseling services on campus, which they are often afraid to visit. I’m a good listener, and a caring person, and if a student is talking about a subject of mutual interest I’ll talk for as much time as I have.
 
And sometimes there’s a limit to how much adolescent romantic and other drama I have space for after doing this as long as I’ve been doing this. Which is one reason I’m retiring and shifting careers.
 
If you don’t work regularly with people in late adolescence, just ask yourself how much of your own free time you would really want to spend hearing about the private lives of 18-21 year olds. If you do work professionally with this age group, how much of your off-the-clock time do you spend just socializing with kids that age? I’m pretty sure very few teachers (no matter how effective and dedicated) or therapists or physicians who work with adolescents spend much extended time socializing with adolescents.
 
I’m sorry if BN or anyone else was offended by my “you pay the escort to leave” quote. It’s here in these forums that someone else pointed that out long ago. While I restated it overly dismissively, there is an aspect to any professional relationship where it is about the work being paid for. Even in the friendliest context, very often what we pay for is some human connection and, if our social needs are met otherwise, to act out a particular sexual fantasy. I’ve dated guys in their late teens and early 20s, and it was exhausting at times. I’ve had absolutely great times with escorts for an hour or two and, I’ll be honest, I really was happy to have the encounter and then to have it over. I’ve also had hookups that were great, but they were just that, hookups, not the starts to beautiful friendships.
 
So, you hire an escort for an hour or two and hit it off and it’s nice. That doesn’t mean he’s now your boyfriend to spend time with you “off the clock.” He’s got a life.
 
Similarly, if you’re an escort and really like the client, that doesn’t mean he’s going to become your friend, or want to hear about your issues with your mother or your boyfriend or girlfriend or whomever. Especially on the clock!
 
I’m acutely aware I am an asshole sometimes, and if this is one of those times, I’m sure someone will point it out (again).
 
Meanwhile, I just had a great exchange with a student here in the dining hall and now I’ll do grade some papers.

I appreciate this reply. It gives me some insight, appreciation and understanding. Thank you for that.

I have been damaged, no question. Because of my financial circumstances, I've never been in a position to hire for more than an hour here or there, and it's been to fulfill specific fantasies. Even in some of those, I've felt the guys were healers and I feel deep gratitude to them.
 
What I've never been able to do is to hire someone regularly, or for an overnight, or for multiple days. It's clear to me that this would be an entirely different sort of experience. The kind of experience you provide, BN, is literally out of my league--but I have no doubt it is extraordinary. And I really doubt anyone pays you "to go away"!
 
Now I have a terrific husband, also damaged and healing, and we are healing together.
 
Meanwhile, I'd say that I have worked with terrific therapists and personal-development coaches and personal trainers and massage therapists and, earlier in life, music teachers, and for the most part our professional relationships have been great and warm and beneficial but rarely were we interested in the details of each other's personal lives or have a social relationship outside our professional relationship. Admiration and warmth and genuine connection, all there. Ina professional context.
 
I did become friends with one trainer, who had grown up with two moms, and suffered some homophobia, and who I think saw me in part as a father figure and asked for some business/career advice on occasion.

When I was a kid, a couple of my friends and I liked to get naked and experiment— snap our erect dicks, look at each other, etc. nothing actually sexual but it was arousing. We’d look at a Playboy or Penthouse we found in one of our dad’s drawers. It was more excitement of the forbidden than anything else.
 
Then one time I noticed the other guys were interested only in the photos of the women and not in each other’s bodies, while I wasn’t interested in the females. That was a clue.
 
In 6th grade or so, the musical ensemble I was in played in a big festival concert in the gym of the high school. There were some high school guys in athletic clothes in the hallway, and the smell of the chlorine from the pool. I’d been in the locker room to change for swimming lessons there earlier. It all made my mind swim a bit and I felt very turned on.
 
In 7th grade, when junior high started, I didn’t have gym class for some reason. The locker room entrance was right across from the music room, and when someone did show me the locker room, I got immediately hard. And it was around that time I started wondering.
 
In eighth grade, the first time I saw guys in the locker room showers I got so hard I probably came close to ejaculating in my pants. I didn’t think “I’m gay,” but it sure was exciting.

I have been damaged, no question. Because of my financial circumstances, I've never been in a position to hire for more than an hour here or there, and it's been to fulfill specific fantasies. Even in some of those, I've felt the guys were healers and I feel deep gratitude to them.
 
What I've never been able to do is to hire someone regularly, or for an overnight, or for multiple days. It's clear to me that this would be an entirely different sort of experience. The kind of experience you provide, BN, is literally out of my league--but I have no doubt it is extraordinary. And I really doubt anyone pays you "to go away"!
 
Now I have a terrific husband, also damaged and healing, and we are healing together.
 
Meanwhile, I'd say that I have worked with terrific therapists and personal-development coaches and personal trainers and massage therapists and, earlier in life, music teachers, and for the most part our professional relationships have been great and warm and beneficial but rarely were we interested in the details of each other's personal lives or have a social relationship outside our professional relationship. Admiration and warmth and genuine connection, all there. Ina professional context.
 
I did become friends with one trainer, who had grown up with two moms, and suffered some homophobia, and who I think saw me in part as a father figure and asked for some business/career advice on occasion.

Whether it is an appointment with a new provider or someone I’ve booked more than once, I like to be always aware of the time. I actually sat one afternoon and just waited. Be somewhat conscious when 15 minutes had past then half an hour. Like others had posted, I don’t wear a watch so it is up to me to be mindful of it. I do enjoy a good conversation but I’m hiring for the fun of it and not yapping. If he’s talking me to death then I’ll just take control of the situation and initiate the physical interaction. Give him the signal that talk is over. It’s time for some fun. If he cannot get into it then he’s just there to milk it and get paid for yapping. It’s time to end the session altogether. If you’re waiting for the provider to initiate it, and for the most part they will, then someone like Theo/Leo will take advantage of it for more $$.

That’s good—you got me!
 
Well, look, I love my students and I like talking with them. And one has to set boundaries. Just as therapists and other professionals do. So I guess I put that while in too snarky a mood.
 
If someone’s in a real crisis, I’m there for them as long as they need to talk and I direct them to the professional counseling services on campus, which they are often afraid to visit. I’m a good listener, and a caring person, and if a student is talking about a subject of mutual interest I’ll talk for as much time as I have.
 
And sometimes there’s a limit to how much adolescent romantic and other drama I have space for after doing this as long as I’ve been doing this. Which is one reason I’m retiring and shifting careers.
 
If you don’t work regularly with people in late adolescence, just ask yourself how much of your own free time you would really want to spend hearing about the private lives of 18-21 year olds. If you do work professionally with this age group, how much of your off-the-clock time do you spend just socializing with kids that age? I’m pretty sure very few teachers (no matter how effective and dedicated) or therapists or physicians who work with adolescents spend much extended time socializing with adolescents.
 
I’m sorry if BN or anyone else was offended by my “you pay the escort to leave” quote. It’s here in these forums that someone else pointed that out long ago. While I restated it overly dismissively, there is an aspect to any professional relationship where it is about the work being paid for. Even in the friendliest context, very often what we pay for is some human connection and, if our social needs are met otherwise, to act out a particular sexual fantasy. I’ve dated guys in their late teens and early 20s, and it was exhausting at times. I’ve had absolutely great times with escorts for an hour or two and, I’ll be honest, I really was happy to have the encounter and then to have it over. I’ve also had hookups that were great, but they were just that, hookups, not the starts to beautiful friendships.
 
So, you hire an escort for an hour or two and hit it off and it’s nice. That doesn’t mean he’s now your boyfriend to spend time with you “off the clock.” He’s got a life.
 
Similarly, if you’re an escort and really like the client, that doesn’t mean he’s going to become your friend, or want to hear about your issues with your mother or your boyfriend or girlfriend or whomever. Especially on the clock!
 
I’m acutely aware I am an asshole sometimes, and if this is one of those times, I’m sure someone will point it out (again).
 
Meanwhile, I just had a great exchange with a student here in the dining hall and now I’ll do grade some papers.

Your second paragraph reminds me of my six grade teacher, just back from a mandatory one-day teachers conversation.
 
She said to the entire class, "I am often surprised at how many teachers dislike children."

I was about 7 and sent off to a summer camp. First or second night, big group showers (supervised) for all campers so 6-7 year olds thru those just hitting puberty. First shower....just about everyone hard a hard on. What a newly discovered mix of different bodies, colors, cocks. Next few nights (I was there two weeks) our newfound erections were gone but I was able to do plenty of looking and realized I was anxious to see one or two of my camp friends in the shower naked.?
 
Also a shocking thing for me....my first BBC ?

I was probably 11 or so, and my 17 year-old brother was a pretty decent athlete. But he wanted to bulk up some before his senior year playing football. He bought some weights and a few Strength & Health magazines. The pictures of the body builders in their posing straps got my attention big time. One day he came into my room unannounced and caught me reading (lusting) and was really glad I was taking an interest in building up my muscles. Yeah, kind of - at least one particular muscle. Those mags were a treasure trove for many a lonely teenage night.

Easy. Seeing Judy Garland perform for about two and a half hours

When I was six and licked the TV screen during the Mr. Olympia contest.
 
My poor parents......

When I was a kid, a couple of my friends and I liked to get naked and experiment— snap our erect dicks, look at each other, etc. nothing actually sexual but it was arousing. We’d look at a Playboy or Penthouse we found in one of our dad’s drawers. It was more excitement of the forbidden than anything else.
 
Then one time I noticed the other guys were interested only in the photos of the women and not in each other’s bodies, while I wasn’t interested in the females. That was a clue.
 
In 6th grade or so, the musical ensemble I was in played in a big festival concert in the gym of the high school. There were some high school guys in athletic clothes in the hallway, and the smell of the chlorine from the pool. I’d been in the locker room to change for swimming lessons there earlier. It all made my mind swim a bit and I felt very turned on.
 
In 7th grade, when junior high started, I didn’t have gym class for some reason. The locker room entrance was right across from the music room, and when someone did show me the locker room, I got immediately hard. And it was around that time I started wondering.
 
In eighth grade, the first time I saw guys in the locker room showers I got so hard I probably came close to ejaculating in my pants. I didn’t think “I’m gay,” but it sure was exciting.

In my young nerdy/twinky days, I was at a performing arts school and got a crush on a dancer with the most perfect body ever. To my surprise, he was attracted to me. My first boyfriend! And he was the least sexually adventurous of anyone I ever slept with, I think. After a couple of weeks we lost interest in each other. (Not surprising for college kids I now realize.)
 
In the intervening years, I occasionally hooked up with someone with an “ideal” muscular body. Almost always a dud in bed. (When I got older and into muscle worship, that didn’t matter so much.)
 
In my 30s and 40s when I was in decent shape and semi-popular at bathhouses, I got the most amazing blow jobs from older, often quite heavy guys.
 
I was never an escort, but as a guy who had sex a lot, I can say I had a blast with guys with all sorts of bodies, including old and fat ones.
 
Meanwhile, whatever karma I built up in those earlier decades seems to be paying off in my 50s and now 60s.