OneFinger

So this fellow goes into the doctor's office.
 
"What seems to be the problem?" the doctor asks.
"Well, every time I fart, instead of the usual toot, my fart sounds like HONDA!"
"Hmmm," the doctor thought. "Can you remove your pants and let me take a look at your anus?"
"Uh ... sure ..." and the patient does what he was asked.
"AHA!" the doctor says, "It's just as I thought. You have a perianal abscess."
"Oh? Okay ... but you seemed to know that before you even examined me."
"Well, the reason is ...
 


"Abscess makes the fart go HONDA."
 

 

 

 

I tip my barber rather liberally every time I get my hair cut (about once per month), so I see no reason for a larger tip than normal at the holidays.

I tip my barber rather liberally every time I get my hair cut (about once per month), so I see no reason for a larger tip than normal at the holidays.

Hi all!
 
Where has the time gone?
 
I'm not sure how long I was away, but it was far too long! Not only was I away from the forum, but I took a break from escorting altogether! Some of you may know that I do work as a pianist and also as a personal trainer; now let's add real estate to the list! Mostly rentals to start, but we'll see how far I can take it. I'm not afraid of escorting interfering with my professional life, which is surprising to some. Fredrik Edlund did porn and is currently one of the most famous real estate professionals in the world, so what do I have to worry about?!
 
UGH I need to update my ad. I've bulked up a bit and I'm so excited to get back into the swing of things!
 
Hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving! I'm here to stay

Daddy,
 
This is a great post but I hate to see it hidden here. Have you considered putting at the top of the Lounge? I think it need wider distribution.

WOW!! I'd hire hire him when he's in Portland.

Sounds like the landlord is very attentive, responsible and caring. Nice that you have such a valuable resource. Tip him well for Christmas!

Daddy,
 
This is a great post but I hate to see it hidden here. Have you considered putting at the top of the Lounge? I think it need wider distribution.

About 18 months ago I noticed a drastic change in my signature. My writing has gotten so bad (due to involuntary trembles in my right hand) I can't even write notes in meetings. Me or no one else can read what I've written. I use a rubber stamp for return addresses on envelopes. I use the computer to print out labels for the addressee.
 
And it's not just writing. I have to be careful what food I order in public. Soup is the worst. Unless I can stab it with a fork, it has little chance of actually reaching my mouth. Some days it's not bad but other days it is terrible. I even have trouble using the mouse to click an icon. Looking into PC alternatives - perhaps voice recognition.

I see people on bicycles use them in the city.

Any social interaction is a good thing. Do you look out the windows? With climate change you might have beachfront property now. If so make your beach a nude only beach and order a pair of binoculars from Amazon. Maybe some Belami guys will frequent your beach.:)

Can't go wrong with Belami!!!

Already got 5 of my Bel Ami BFF's lined up for next week. Two I love and see a lot, Roald Ekberg and Thom Jacobs, are stressing a lot over soon hitting 27. Hard for me to sympathize but I have to pretend. BA starts them at 18 and sends 'em to the glue factory at 25.

Love those Belami boys.

https://str8upgayporn.com/cockyboys-austin-wilde-and-joey-mills-sweep-2nd-annual-str8upgayporn-awards-complete-winners-list/
 
I'm glad that there were some Belami winners.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikpd7ZT2-Ks

I saw/ heard the Jimmy Dean commercial last week, told my parents the man been dead for years. they still using his voice to hock sasauge

The last time I saw an ad for Jimmy Dean sausage he was not in the ad. It is creepy that they are still using them, though.
 
Come to think of it, the
and they were pretty weird. A guy was in a sun costume and people in planet costumes were slowly walking around him. Then he served them Jimmy Dean sandwiches and they were orbiting him faster.  
The ones with Dean are less creepy.

Ya, the Jimmy Dean ads kinda freak me out a tad, and the ever-changing Colonel Sanders casting make me nuts- I mean, really, Reba MacIntyre? Jason Alexander? Who thew hell comes up with this stuff? The other day, I saw an ad featuring a bunch of small kids throwing up and saying "poopy pinata"- WTF?

I used the Geek Squad about five years ago when my motherboard went dead. They fixed it with no questions asked - they are Geeks, after all. It took a couple of days and they called and said "Your laptop is ready." I think as long as you don't have kiddie porn popping up, they couldn't care less what you were watching. They were pretty reasonable, cost-wise.

I heard an F-to-M speak at our local LGBT center. Was fascinating. Learned a lot.

Very interesting article about 2 identical twins who are just completing their joint transition from female to male. At the the age to 15 they confided to each other they were not comfortable as female. They waited until after high school to start the transition. They are now 23 years old and both work as correction officers.
 
http://www.towleroad.com/2018/10/identical-twins/

Very interesting article about 2 identical twins who are just completing their joint transition from female to male. At the the age to 15 they confided to each other they were not comfortable as female. They waited until after high school to start the transition. They are now 23 years old and both work as correction officers.
 
http://www.towleroad.com/2018/10/identical-twins/

I have no idea what happened to Bozo. But, I do hope it involved a speeding bus.

Don't know if this is happening elsewhere but here in Portland I'm noticing a strange TV ad for Jimmy Dean Sausage. He sold the company to Sara Lee in 1984. They have continued to use his folksy ad since buying the company.
 
However there has been a real increase in the number and frequencies in the ads. Am I the only one that finds it strange they still running Jimmy Dean's commercials?? He's been dead over 8 (yes EIGHT) years.
 
I find it creepy to hear dead man still pitching sausage for a company he sold almost 35 years ago.