Sunday Sermon- Resignation

[+ Lucky]

“No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other, or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other.”

 

Since Hooboy's death, there has been a group of people who claim to be truer believers than those of us here. They left Hooville to form their own competing website. Now, Barry, a moderator here, has joined with them to become a moderator at their site. I think this is a slap in the face to those of us who have hung on and supported this website during the travails of the last year, and I call upon Barry to resign as moderator here.

[Boston Guy]

Lucky,

 

I'm almost always on your side. :-)

 

But not this time.

 

This site has been important to our community for quite a long time and I'm an avid supporter of it. But there has long been a tendency to take it somewhat too seriously. I plead guilty for having fallen into this particular mire on more than one occasion.

 

M4M is still just a website. It's one among many, and it always has been. In some ways, it wasn't even the first of its kind. (I'd credit ATKOL with that.) It's a good gathering place, a good place to share information or pass some time. But, when it's taken too seriously, troubles begin.

 

Barry has given enormous amounts of his time to M4M. We've all benefited from his willingness to act as a moderator. He's shown a good, steady hand in a tough position.

 

I think it's a mistake to try to turn this into some kind of war between MER and M4M. There's absolutely no reason both places can't coexist. Competition is healthy and people will go where they want to.

 

Similarly, the job of moderator is thankless one. If Barry is willing to volunteer his time at both places, I say more power to him. It's not like there are thousands of people lining up asking for the job.

 

The people who started MER are people I respect and like. But they have a big job in front of them. M4M has a huge jump on them and it may prove difficult for them to get it going. I've noticed that there have been very few posts over there over the last few days. If they don't get more of a critical mass going soon, people will simply stop checking in.

 

I hope they succeed. From the point of view of a consumer, two M4M-like sites is better than one, if for no other reason than we're not putting all our eggs in one basket. And if the presence of two credible sites causes the owners of each to be more creative and try to offer more services, then that's great. We all win.

 

So I suggest we all thank Barry very much for years of service on our behalf, applaud his stamina and energy, stand in awe of his willingness to act as a moderator on two sites (!) and give him credit for being a bright, honest, ethical guy who will do the right thing if he gets to a point where he himself thinks he has a conflict of interest.

 

BG

[+ Charlie]

BG, on this one I have to disagree with you. These websites are businesses, as Oz made very clear in his long post on MER. And they are in competition for an audience, as you acknowledge in your post. Can someone hold a sensitive position for both Hertz and Avis? I like Barry, I think he has done an excellent job as moderator here, but I think he is mistaken in thinking that he can do the same job on both websites simultaneously, however well-intentioned he may be.

[Boston Guy]

Charlie,

 

You may be right. But, if so, I think Barry will figure that out for himself. In the meantime, I think his enormous contribution to M4M over the years is reason enough for the rest of us to give him a lot of slack and room to figure it out for himself.

 

BG

[+ deej]

"Judge not that ye be not judged."

 

I already told Barry this in private:

 

I wish him all the luck in the world, and I think he's a glutton for punishment. ;-)

 

If a conflict arises down the line, I trust Barry to recognize and rectify it. He always has been the grown-up around here. Beyond that, what he chooses to do with his spare time is up to him.

[+ Lucky]

Well, I wish Barry well too. I just think he has to make a choice. Sure, he has made valuable contributions here and I hope he continues to. But I don't think he can be a moderator at both sites. If I were a moderator, I wouldn't know what to say in the moderator's forum for fear it would make its way over to the competition. Plus it sends the wrong message.

 

It's not a situation where I am going to win and Barry's going to lose, or vice versa. I am stating my opinion. Others can state theirs.

[+ deej]

>Plus it sends the wrong message.

 

Hmmm... "There's room in this town for both of us." I'm not sure how that's a wrong message no matter what form it takes.

 

>It's not a situation where I am going to win and Barry's going

>to lose, or vice versa. I am stating my opinion. Others can

>state theirs.

 

As I've done.

[jackhammer91406]

Sharing the play space

 

Lucky,

You know my feelings about you personally, so I trust you will take this the right way. I think you are way off base here.

I feel that while it may appear that the sites are in competition (and ultimately that will shake out in the final wash) for now, the new forum presents a place to interact with some personalities that are no longer here (whether by choice or not). There are guys who have been banned from here that sometimes have things of value to say (if not always in the most genteel way) and I am glad for a chance to agree with them when I can and take them to task when I can't agree. Similarly, there are guys at the new site who no longer are active here by choice. Checking in at the new site gives me a chance to catch up on their travels and activities. They have been missed here.

 

To the credit of the people at the new site, they have specifically stated it is not their intention to take anything away from this site. I take them at their word since the other OTHER site set out expressly to tear this one down. The participation at that site is fairly limited to the people who enjoy tearing a new one into everyone that doesn't agree with them. They are quick to point out everyone else's hypocrisy but their own, just as they say we are quick to recognize others hypocrisy but our own. At any rate the tone of the older OTHER site has always been negative in general and the webmaster has even decried that fact on the website asking posters to refocus their messages to attract a more positive membership base.

 

The tone at the New OTHER site is completely different and as such, offers an additional (not other) place to play. I don't think any of us needs to make a either/or decision about the new OTHER site, least of all Barry, who it has been pointed out, tends to be one of the most stable and reasoned voices in admin here.

 

Having more than one place to share information and interact with like minded men can only benefit the community at large. It's only when WE make it a competition that things get ugly.

[+ Lucky]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

Well, I appreciate that we differ over this and there are no hard feelings.

 

Privately a couple of friends have suggested to me that I care too much...that this is ultimately not my concern as long as I get to post what I want. No one is interfering with that! Thinking about it, I know that they are right. Barry's decision ultimately is of no real concern of mine. I have my view on it and have stated it.

 

The duplicity I have encountered with people here is distressing but I have to caution myself not to take it too seriously. The reason to be here is to be entertained and informed. I have to keep that in mind.

[Chuck50]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

Lucky I value what you say most of the time. I will say that I too think there is room for both. I met and had a nice relationship so to say with HB. I have grown to know Totally OZ through another mutual friend and reading what he say's I have faith in what he is doing. I too now belong to both sites. Not because I don't like this one but I want to also be part of the other one. I just like all of us being happy and trying to promote some kind of harmony among ourselves. HUGS Love ya Guys!!! Chuck50:P :P

[+ Lucky]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

Chuck, your loyalty is one of your most admirable qualities. When a friend of yours is getting heat, you are always right there on his behalf.

 

Obviously I am not winning this point. I like to be right, and think I am here. But I know I can't win them all! I'll stay with Hooville until they close the doors. Then, I'll get a life!

[jackhammer91406]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

Lucky,

Friends will disagree now and then, doesn't mean I don't have your back if someone comes gunning for you, I read things in other places where you are being badmouthed for speaking your opinion. I have more respect for you than you will ever know. Much braver speaking your opinion against the grain than making snipes at people like this pseudo person Rico. He's real brave. He acts so much like a Pope, does he have to wear the goofy hat and designer shoes?

 

Note to Rico, come down off your elevated platform and breathe some real air with the rest of us common folk, and you might get a clue as to what is real and what isn't. So you have a place of your own where you can shout your inane drivel to the masses and hope it passes for gospel? Guess what that doesn't give you a brain. Having your own blog simply allows you to pass gas without fear of contradiction. I notice the reply function is not active. hmmmm, scared of too much Reality M4M?}(

[Boston Guy]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

>Obviously I am not winning this point. I like to be right, and think I am here.

 

Well, your track record over time is pretty damned good. I think this is just a case where good people can see it differently and agree to disagree.

 

>But I know I can't win them all!

 

Nope, more's the pity. But at least you recognize this and are gracious about the disagreement.

 

>I'll stay with Hooville until they close the doors. Then, I'll get a life!

 

Well, I'll probably be one of the last ones thrown out of the bar, too. We'll share a last drink together and toast old friends now departed. :-)

 

BG

[digicamman]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

Decide against saying what I said

[twinklover]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

No sure whether I can even post anymore. And while I have had harsh words to say on other sites, I have always observed the rules of this site. I will reserve my comments concerning

Lucky to another site. I actually had kind words to say about him one night on the "mean girls" site because he can be pretty funny. As to Bostonguy, we go way back and I probably will be one of the last ones out of the bar with you having a final toast, no matter the circumstances. I don't care. This is about persons, not what we may think about everything someone may say or do.

 

I'll get to the point. From what I can discern, and I haven't been around here forever, Barry is a great guy and exactly the kind of "moderate" guy anyone would want as a "moderator". He can navigate the stormiest of seas with an even keel. Very few people can do that.

 

I have never bad-mouthed Daddy here or on other sites and I have personal reasons for doing so. Kindness should never be betrayed, as least in my "Godfather" view of morality. So I hope that principle is observed with respect to Barry. It doesn't matter what site he's on. The few people concerned with this, how many are they, a hundred or a few hundred, trust Barry (we don't really know him, he's just an internet persona, but we can tell things about him and we trust him) and we know he will do the right thing.

[+ newatthis]

I admire the grown-up way MER has come on the scene. Here's my fear. These sites are valuable to me in direct proportion to their depth -- the number of (interesting) posters, and the number of reviews. I doubt that many will bother to post and review on both sites; so if both survive, the value of each will be diminished. (Counterthought: they might both survive, but appeal to different markets.)

 

As for Barry? I trust him (or his internet persona!) to handle dual moderation with his usual grace and tact.

[JesusNYC]

DIFFICULT

 

It seems like being a moderator on a site is a very difficult job and Hooboys is no ordinary site. It seems technically challenging, maybe even stressful. I can't imagine who would have the time. I have not been a member of Hooboys long, but I admire anybody willing to moderator a site this large and complex.

 

JesusNYC

}(

[Boston Guy]

RE: Sharing the play space

 

> As to Bostonguy, we go way back and I probably

>will be one of the last ones out of the bar with you having a

>final toast, no matter the circumstances. I don't care. This

>is about persons, not what we may think about everything

>someone may say or do.

>

 

Twinklover:

 

Back at you. I agree 100%. I'll be happy to share that drink with you -- to old times, good times, old friends. And just where the hell is Tyler? :-)

 

Seek

[Guest zipperzone]

RE: DIFFICULT

 

>I can't imagine who would

>have the time. I have not been a member of Hooboys long, but I

>admire anybody willing to moderator a site this large and

>complex.

>

>JesusNYC

>}(

 

Your quite right - I just checked your stats - 245 posts in just under three weeks. What a busy little fucker you turned out to be!

[TJM]

Thanks for the info on the new site...I've checked it out and have tried to sign up for four days...anyone know who I can contact to try to get signed up? I've sent several emails with no responses...when I tried to register again I'm told I'm already registered...just doesn't seem to be anyone on the other side of the screen Thought maybe someone who posts here might be able to communicate the issue to the site owners/moderators. Thanks!

[+ deej]

IIRC, there was information on the top page of that site, including an email address, for addressing signup issues.

[Guest ncm2169]

Isn't this really all irrelevant?

 

The competition for traffic between the sites will be driven by the content - the Reviews, and in the case of MER, the escort listings.

 

Message Boards are nice, but they don't determine the site traffic, and hence, not the revenue. As far as I know, Barry has nothing to do with content or management - only moderating the message board. That's likely to have zero impact on this site's viability or success.

 

Frankly, I think it's nice to have two escort sites to check with my morning coffee. }(

[OneFinger]

After Lucky's original post on Sunday I went to the site (which I previously didn't know existed). Actually signed up (just to reserve my "usual" name).

 

Tried to go there about 30 minutes ago and Firefox is still waiting for the site to load. I think it's either OIA or TU.

 

-------------

"We need to have more respect for each other. Things have just gone really crazy, out of control. ... We're on a very weird kind of cycle." Stevie Wonder

[+ deej]

OIA?

 

It seems like an acronym I should know but I can't place it.

[OneFinger]

OIA = On Its Ass

TU = Tits Up

 

 

Speaking of acronyms, do you know:

 

DILIGAF

 

and

 

DILIGAS

 

 

-------------

"We need to have more respect for each other. Things have just gone really crazy, out of control. ... We're on a very weird kind of cycle." Stevie Wonder