Have you ever wanted children?

[bigvalboy]

@Walker1 ,

Yeah, I agree that you never know what you'll get as far as genes go.. Looks and athletic ability (depending on his own build) are easier to guarantee than intelligence, which is clearly important to him also. That's why he paid for the top-school eggs. Hope the kid doesn't end up with any special needs. As you say, that sometimes happens even if both parents are very smart.

 

BTW, I'm definitely not criticizing him. I was just shocked that a nearly 60 y.o. man who already has 2 kids would want to go through the process again.

 

 

 

Egg donors are typically sourced from college campuses and are usually paid about $10K for the risk, pain, and trouble.

 

A few parents want donors from the very top universities , especially if both parents went to such universities themselves. But most women at elite schools are less desperate for money, so it's nearly impossible to get an egg donor from those schools. This guy probably paid around $100K .

 

Like buying a new Mercedes, only cheaper.

[+ FreshFluff]

Like buying a new Mercedes, only cheaper.

 

More like a Ferrari mini-me.

[Walker1]

Like buying a new Mercedes, only cheaper.

 

Can't really blame them. if you were a woman and were looking for a sperm donor and had a choice of Pietro Boselli-hot guy with an engineering degree or Danny De Vito-which would you choose?

 

I do hear a lot of designer babies comments and went through those comments myself, but we all choose are our partners the same way-personality, looks or whatever floats our boats. May or may not be right-but hey

[+ sniper]

Looks are much more of a crapshoot than people realize, though. I've seen some very good-looking people with downright homely parents, and vice versa. And while he's not ugly, Luke Hemsworth looks out of place in a picture with Chris and Liam. Different body type even.

[+ FreshFluff]

Can't really blame them. if you were a woman and were looking for a sperm donor and had a choice of Pietro Boselli-hot guy with an engineering degree or Danny De Vito-which would you choose?

 

I do hear a lot of designer babies comments and went through those comments myself, but we all choose are our partners the same way-personality, looks or whatever floats our boats. May or may not be right-but hey

 

Oh, I'd get designer sperm too. I mean, look at my avatar. On a basic level, I'm just jealous that he can outsource all the hard stuff without any societal disapproval. I could use a surrogate, but I'd have to do the egg retrieval if I want to use my own genetic material.

 

I think you have to be able to deal with all possible scenarios for how the child will turn out; hopefully, this guy will be able to do so.

[+ sniper]

There's also the little discussed issue that IVF babies have a significantly higher rate

Oh, I'd get the best available sperm too. I mean, look at my avatar. On a basic level, I'm just jealous that he can outsource all the hard stuff without any societal disapproval. I could use a surrogate, but I'd have to do the egg retrieval if I want to use my own genetic material.

I think most people find the situation you're talking about straight-up weird and probably don't quite approve, for a variety of reasons. It's so rare it's just not on people's radar.

[+ FreshFluff]

I think most people find the situation you're talking about straight-up weird and probably don't quite approve, for a variety of reasons. It's so rare it's just not on people's radar.

 

A fair number of women use a sperm donor and have kids on their own. But that's usually because they can't find a partner AND haven't had children yet. This guy is an exception to both of those rules.

 

I have a feeling that people will get used to it. He'll continue to get laid all the time.

[Walker1]

Oh, I'd get designer sperm too. I mean, look at my avatar. On a basic level, I'm just jealous that he can outsource all the hard stuff without any societal disapproval. I could use a surrogate, but I'd have to do the egg retrieval if I want to use my own genetic material.

 

I think you have to be able to deal with all possible scenarios for how the child will turn out; hopefully, this guy will be able to do so.

 

True. I mean look at the kids of Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee-you would think they would have been like Greek Gods-but instead closer to us normal people. I have seen twins even-one is spectacular and the other is for lack of better word-homely.

 

Then of course apart from the usual disease etc you have the drug addicts and the kids who move back into the basement and play video games all day! Only in your finance guy's case he will be in his 80s and won't see that or will be in a retirement home by then.

 

Yeah for us men it is easy, we just have to do what we do when we are alone and get some help from the hand. But egg retrieval and all those fertility drugs-yup. Not being judgemental, just trying to understand, one thing I didn't understand single women getting egg donors and carrying the kid themselves. Why would you want to carry someone else's baby-in that case would it not be easier to adopt-since it is not yours genetically anyways? Or does carrying and giving birth to a baby create a special bond-as a man I will never know. In some cases since it is the husband's sperm, yes then it is the couple, but otherwise-but again to each his/her own, just trying to understand as I am not a woman.

[+ sniper]

Well carrying the child does bond it to the gestational mother via hormones, and there is apparently even a very low level of genetic material that gets passed between.

Also being pregnant will cause the mother to lactate and she will be able to breast feed. But I think there might be ways to achieve that with medication.

[BaronArtz]

Remember 'Barbaro'? A perfectly proportioned thoroughbred who convincingly won the Kentucky Derby a few years ago? After his tragic death on the race track, the owners frequently repeated the mating, i.e. same sire and dam, with the hopes of creating another superstar horse. It never happened. Genetics are powerful, but creating a champion is rare and involves random luck.

 

This is what I think of when I see people spend a lot money, finding the right dam for their seed, hoping to produce superior quality offspring. Sorry, it doesn't work that way.

[+ FreshFluff]

Remember 'Barbaro'? A perfectly proportioned thoroughbred who convincingly won the Kentucky Derby a few years ago? After his tragic death on the race track, the owners frequently repeated the mating, i.e. same sire and dam, with the hopes of creating another superstar horse. It never happened. Genetics are powerful, but creating a champion is rare and involves random luck.

 

Very good point. I hadn't heard about Barbaro, but that's an interesting story.

[+ FreshFluff]

All right, all you Queen Isabellas. Here I go, whatever the results may be.

http://www.sonofthesouth.net/revolutionary-war/explorers/voyage-christopher-columbus.jpg

Edited November 19, 2017 by FreshFluff

[Walker1]

Are you doing the frozen egs or embryos or surrogacy?

[+ FreshFluff]

Are you doing the frozen egs or embryos or surrogacy?

 

Frozen eggs

[bigvalboy]

Frozen eggs

 

God bless you FF...Wishing you all the luck in the world.

[BaronArtz]

Good luck, FF! I hope this will bring you joy and happiness.

[MikeBiDude]

Frozen eggs

All the best it’s will be an amazing worthwhile journey...

[Walker1]

Frozen eggs

Wonderful, go for it. At least with frozen eggs, you have a choice and passage of time won't diminish your chance of a genetic child-to me and that is just me, that was important.. Maybe one of the gents in the galleries might be available for "donation".

[+ FreshFluff]

Thanks for the will wishes, everyone! @Walker1 , I feel the same way. Unfortunately, the doctors warned me not to accept any "donations" for the next few weeks.

Edited November 20, 2017 by FreshFluff

[+ sniper]

Have you considered fertilizing a couple with donor sperm just in case? My understanding is frozen embryos hold up much better/have a higher success rate than frozen eggs, but that may be out of date info. Might be useful to have a backup in the event "Mr. Right" turns out to have fertility issues.

[+ FreshFluff]

Have you considered fertilizing a couple with donor sperm just in case? My understanding is frozen embryos hold up much better/have a higher success rate than frozen eggs, but that may be out of date info. Might be useful to have a backup in the event "Mr. Right" turns out to have fertility issues.

 

I agree about the frozen eggs vs. embryo, although my doctor thinks the difference is less than people believe.

 

Nevertheless, I gave this a lot of soul searching and thought. I'm not going to change my mind about having kids alone, so that part is settled. Doing both as a hedge, as you suggested, is unlikely to work in this case.

 

You are pretty knowledgeable about this stuff, sniper.

[+ sniper]

Two of my college friends used a surrogate and my brother and his wife went through several rounds of IVF to have their kids. And I used to do a little reading on the subject when I was younger thinking about whether/how I would have children.

[samhexum]

DEAR ABBY: I joined the Navy after I learned I was becoming a father. I didn't want to be a husband or father, but I did both. In 2010, my wife died. My feelings about being a husband and father never changed.

 

Our two children are now grown and want me to move near -- or in with -- them. They say, "Won't it be great to be with your grandkids?" No, it won't!

 

I worked and supported my family. When I was in port, I went to baseball, softball and basketball games, had tea with my daughter and did everything I believe I should have done. I have served my time. I don't want to "be close." Honestly, I'd prefer they left me alone. I don't love them, and I didn't love their mother. I did my duty to the best of my abilities both in uniform and in family.

 

When we aren't together, I'm happy. I read, I study and do what I like. I've earned that, haven't I? How do I get them out of my life so that at age 52 I have my own life? I don't want to hurt anyone, but I never wanted a family in the first place. -- NEVER WANTED A FAMILY

 

 

DEAR NEVER WANTED A FAMILY: The one thing you should not do is express your feelings to your children as bluntly as you have to me. Because you don't want to hurt them, a way to phrase it might be to say that having done your job as a parent to the best of your ability, you need time to yourself now -- time to read, study, travel, reflect, etc. Be sure to make clear that it has nothing to do with them -- that you are proud of them and the way they are handling their lives -- so they won't think they are somehow to blame.

Edited December 12, 2017 by samhexum

[gallahadesquire]

A friend of mine's mother told him that he should be grateful that he wasn't aborted, as it was socially inappropriate for her to be seen at her summer residence pregnant.

 

But the abortion had been planned, and this was when they were illegal.

Edited June 22, 2018 by gallahadesquire

[+ sniper]

A friend of mine's mother told him that he should be grateful that he wasn't aborted, as it was socially inappropriate for her to be seen at her summer residence pregnant.

 

But it had been planned.

The abortion or the pregnancy?