How to avoid paying for no-chemistry

[rossthebosssf]

If the escort is clean, well presented and clearly living up to his end of the bargain, then I feel I should honor the rate for the time that I booked. I typically do 2 hours and as long as I finish in some way shape or form, then I feel it's money well spent. I just won't repeat and I'm likely to leave early. Now, if I meet a guy who is strung out, home is a mess, unshowered, etc. then I feel he didn't live up to his end of the bargain and I feel I owe nothing.

[wklucas]

Now if the said escort is of the variety that they don't really enjoy what they are doing, just trying to hustle for money, then by all means leave.

 

Reminds me of this - Years ago a straight guy - total STUD....I simply enjoyed his bod & servicing him (& he went along with kissing too).....he worked through an agency & I had booked him several times.....at one point, he made the offer to me - bypass the agency, call him direct for a slightly lower charge....I agreed......1st time under this new "arrangement"....I show up, we get started.....after not too long, he gets out of bed & goes into his living room (we always met at his place)....after a few minutes, he doesn't come back to bed....I find him sitting on the living room couch with a towel wrapped around his waist.....in the middle of a session (!!!!) he starts telling me that he does not want to be doing this kind of work any longer......anyway, I tell him that I'd really like to at least still get off & I talk him back to bed.....when we're finished, he tells me that he had been planning to send me home free of charge but now since I had taken the session further, I would then still have to pay.....which was of course fine by me......(I never saw him again after that.....I have no idea if he really quit the agency for getting work at that same time either).....but again, total dreamy masculine STUD....late 20's or early 30's at the time, 6'4" / ~230 / hairy bod / great look.

[Guest DeepSouthDad53]

how much chemistry does one need to suck cock lol or to put a cock up someone's ass.

 

In some cases, many scotch and waters and a few snorts?

[MrMattBig]

I have no idea what this is.

http://68.media.tumblr.com/511a9619e2ba98af75a5a8ae0d4795ae/tumblr_o2abew6bCD1tsjzgfo1_540.gif

 

Pocket posted lol sorry

[+ poolboy48220]

You all can't spend 1 hour with someone you don't gel the best with:eek: How do y'all survive at work then

I drink. MOSTLY after work.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Maybe you will be more open to further explanation than Roberto was. I'm really having trouble wrapping my head around this whole concept of a "vibe." Chemistry I understand, but that takes going through the session to know if you have chemistry. What can happen in the first few minutes to turn you off to the person? Bad smells, too effeminate, too distant? I can't decide if people are talking about vibes to be politically correct and not call out some other characteristic. Or am I just lacking in some kind of cosmic awareness?

 

It happened to me three times, that I remember. It is hard to be specific and identify one single thing. When I feel attraction it is to the whole packet, to the way many little different things combined together impact me. The same when I do not feel attraction. I could tell that two of the guys had feminine mannerisms, but that has not been a problem many other times. I just know that after sitting and talking for five minutes I did not feel any attraction. I did not kick them out immediately (I prefer to host), I told them what was going on, we kept talking and trying a little bit of kissing and touching, but it did not work. I paid the full fee, two of the guys left immediately (no bad attitudes, everything was friendly and even fun), the third one lingered a little bit chatting and smoking.

[Man Crush Morris]

I am mindful of chemistry since my tastes are very narrow. When I select a guy I sometimes ask to meet him for coffee or something and pay for his time. I promise to not bring up anything related to escorting at the meeting This gives me an opportunity to see if the pics are accurate and see if I'm attracted to him.

 

Some guys say sure. One didn't even charge me for the quick meeting,which was nice but I didn't really get excited around him. Others won't do it and that alienates me. One guy I really found attractive first said yes then texted me the next day declining. I thought that was weird. Never hired him.

 

For me a no pressure meeting seems like a good idea. If I really like the guy it can be a long agreement, and it shows I'm serious and treating this with maturity.

 

If I asked for a freebie then I could see turning me down. But I offer to pay around 5,% of his rate for 20-25 mins of his time at his convenience. I don't think it's too much to ask.

[rvwnsd]

Had a recent meeting like that with a well reviewed one here. I showed up at his place on time. He was late, just came from outside, clearly looking disorganized. Told me to wait in lobby and he will call. 15 min later he said to come up. I did, and I almost ran at that point (in hind sight I should have). Complete disarray, and steroids and needles everywhere. He was finishing his protein drink and proceeded to pick up vials and needles to inject, thank god out of my sight. At that point I was afraid to run as he is more than twice my size and likely could have inflicted lots of damage, esp in a roid rage. So I proceeded cautiously and of course he couldn't perform in any adequate way. So relaying back to this thread, the chemistry was definitely off right at the beginning, I was totally caught off guard as he has like 30 glowing reviews, and there was an element of safety. So to avoid harming myself I went thru the motions and paid. IF I had proposed the "no chemistry 1/2 off idea" I'm sure we would have never met, and I'm now considering that as a last bit of screening mechanism for myself

 

What you are describing is not a problem of chemistry. The guy was late and had needles and steroids lying around. And who knows what else. That's more than a bit different than "I showed up at his place, he was exactly as described and promised, but it wasn't workin' for me so I left and didn't want to pay him."

[rvwnsd]

Had a recent meeting like that with a well reviewed one here. I showed up at his place on time. He was late, just came from outside, clearly looking disorganized. Told me to wait in lobby and he will call. 15 min later he said to come up. I did, and I almost ran at that point (in hind sight I should have). Complete disarray, and steroids and needles everywhere. He was finishing his protein drink and proceeded to pick up vials and needles to inject, thank god out of my sight. At that point I was afraid to run as he is more than twice my size and likely could have inflicted lots of damage, esp in a roid rage. So I proceeded cautiously and of course he couldn't perform in any adequate way. So relaying back to this thread, the chemistry was definitely off right at the beginning, I was totally caught off guard as he has like 30 glowing reviews, and there was an element of safety. So to avoid harming myself I went thru the motions and paid. IF I had proposed the "no chemistry 1/2 off idea" I'm sure we would have never met, and I'm now considering that as a last bit of screening mechanism for myself

 

What you are describing is not a problem of chemistry. The guy was late and had needles and steroids lying around. And who knows what else. That's more than a bit different than "I showed up at his place, he was exactly as described and promised, but it wasn't workin' for me so I left and didn't want to pay him."

[instudiocity]

Seems there is a whole lotta planning to fail and scheming to short the escort out of his fee going on around here.

 

If you cannot afford the hobby, don't play the sport.

[instudiocity]

Seems there is a whole lotta planning to fail and scheming to short the escort out of his fee going on around here.

 

If you cannot afford the hobby, don't play the sport.

[ncc1701d]

What you are describing is not a problem of chemistry. The guy was late and had needles and steroids lying around. And who knows what else. That's more than a bit different than "I showed up at his place, he was exactly as described and promised, but it wasn't workin' for me so I left and didn't want to pay him."

 

True..was trying to illustrate an example where leaving after meeting and not paying was maybe appropriate to do

[ncc1701d]

What you are describing is not a problem of chemistry. The guy was late and had needles and steroids lying around. And who knows what else. That's more than a bit different than "I showed up at his place, he was exactly as described and promised, but it wasn't workin' for me so I left and didn't want to pay him."

 

True..was trying to illustrate an example where leaving after meeting and not paying was maybe appropriate to do

[rvwnsd]

True..was trying to illustrate an example where leaving after meeting and not paying was maybe appropriate to do

That part I got. You mentioned it was bad chemistry, though. Not really the same thing.

[rvwnsd]

True..was trying to illustrate an example where leaving after meeting and not paying was maybe appropriate to do

That part I got. You mentioned it was bad chemistry, though. Not really the same thing.

[LaffingBear]

I am mindful of chemistry since my tastes are very narrow. When I select a guy I sometimes ask to meet him for coffee or something and pay for his time. I promise to not bring up anything related to escorting at the meeting This gives me an opportunity to see if the pics are accurate and see if I'm attracted to him.

I am surprised.

 

Ive offered to meet first, indicated Id pay for time. Every guy declines. Never even got to the point of discussing rate for pre-meet.

 

Ive interpreted it as "their time is their time." Setting a lower rate for coffee undermines the concept of paying for time. And a busy escort may not have the time for such meetings.

[LaffingBear]

I am mindful of chemistry since my tastes are very narrow. When I select a guy I sometimes ask to meet him for coffee or something and pay for his time. I promise to not bring up anything related to escorting at the meeting This gives me an opportunity to see if the pics are accurate and see if I'm attracted to him.

I am surprised.

 

Ive offered to meet first, indicated Id pay for time. Every guy declines. Never even got to the point of discussing rate for pre-meet.

 

Ive interpreted it as "their time is their time." Setting a lower rate for coffee undermines the concept of paying for time. And a busy escort may not have the time for such meetings.

[former lurker]

I am mindful of chemistry since my tastes are very narrow. When I select a guy I sometimes ask to meet him for coffee or something and pay for his time. I promise to not bring up anything related to escorting at the meeting This gives me an opportunity to see if the pics are accurate and see if I'm attracted to him.

 

Some guys say sure. One didn't even charge me for the quick meeting,which was nice but I didn't really get excited around him. Others won't do it and that alienates me. One guy I really found attractive first said yes then texted me the next day declining. I thought that was weird. Never hired him.

 

For me a no pressure meeting seems like a good idea. If I really like the guy it can be a long agreement, and it shows I'm serious and treating this with maturity.

 

If I asked for a freebie then I could see turning me down. But I offer to pay around 5,% of his rate for 20-25 mins of his time at his convenience. I don't think it's too much to ask.

I am surprised.

 

Ive offered to meet first, indicated Id pay for time. Every guy declines. Never even got to the point of discussing rate for pre-meet.

 

Ive interpreted it as "their time is their time." Setting a lower rate for coffee undermines the concept of paying for time. And a busy escort may not have the time for such meetings.

 

I'm surprised this works out well for you. Offering "5%" of an hourly fee for a meet in a public space seems cheap to me -- the escort has to be on display, at his best, as in an audition, to travel (taking up more of his time), and he has to forego other opportunities that may arise, even at the last minute. This site is overly client-friendly because of the balance of contributors, but I, as a client, find the idea that the escort should meet in person for a paltry fee to be unreasonable.

[MikeyGMin]

I'm surprised this works out well for you. Offering "5%" of an hourly fee for a meet in a public space seems cheap to me -- the escort has to be on display, at his best, as in an audition, to travel (taking up more of his time), and he has to forego other opportunities that may arise, even at the last minute. This site is overly client-friendly because of the balance of contributors, but I, as a client, find the idea that the escort should meet in person for a paltry fee to be unreasonable.

I assumed it was a typo and he really meant 50%, but even still, I'm surprised he gets many guys to agree to it. Who doesn't hate a job interview?

[Man Crush Morris]

I'm surprised this works out well for you. Offering "5%" of an hourly fee for a meet in a public space seems cheap to me -- the escort has to be on display, at his best, as in an audition, to travel (taking up more of his time), and he has to forego other opportunities that may arise, even at the last minute. This site is overly client-friendly because of the balance of contributors, but I, as a client, find the idea that the escort should meet in person for a paltry fee to be unreasonable.

Guys, I'm very sorry. Typo. 50% of his fee for a quick meet at his convenience, not 5%. I wouldn't expect anyone to take me seriously for 5%.

[Nvr2Thick]

Some chemical reactions take time. I can recall a Backpage escort I met about 15 years ago in Miami who gave off a first impression that had me wishing I hadn't set up the session. He had a gorgeous body exactly as advertised, but he came across less as a butch Latin total top and more of an Agador Spartacus vibe that I hadn't noticed when we spoke on the phone. His bitchiness, however, dissipated as we got past the awkward introductory chatter. I don't think that he was a genuinely friendly person, and it took him a bit of time to slip into character. He was also probably keying off of my nervousness, and the negative body language I was sending out due to my first impressions. I spent the first ten minutes wishing I had the balls to walk out, and the the next two hours very glad that I stayed. I'd give him a two-star review for smalltalk and five-plus stars as an escort and top man.

 

I can think of quite a few guys who turned me off initially just based on their attire and their home decor. If they seem too stereotypically gay I can start reading into every word and mannerism. Often those things don't matter once we've moved past the "getting to know you" phase.

 

If the chemistry seems wrong and it's really just chemistry I always give it a chance, and I do what I can to try to adapt and improve the situation from my end. I also try to figure out whether I'm contributing to the bad chemistry -- I make sure that I'm more outwardly positive even if I have my doubts.

[marylander1940]

Re: roberto's Tuesday thread.

 

On the pre-meeting phone call, I always say-ask:

"If during the first couple of minutes I get a subjective bad vibe, I apologize and leave without paying or bad feelings. Is that ok with you?"

 

Various responses: yes; no; pay me 10/20 percent; I can do that only during non-peak time; go to hell.

 

I never imagined asking something like that in my life. I've met guys who didn't look like their pics and I walked away, I've met others who I simply suggested them to use some mouthwash, etc.

 

Some chemical reactions take time. I can recall a Backpage escort I met about 15 years ago in Miami who gave off a first impression that had me wishing I hadn't set up the session. He had a gorgeous body exactly as advertised, but he came across less as a butch Latin total top and more of an Agador Spartacus vibe that I hadn't noticed when we spoke on the phone. His bitchiness, however, dissipated as we got past the awkward introductory chatter. I.

 

Exactly, it's not like trying a wine with just a sip.

 

He turned from Spartacus to Agador Spartacus. Was it the shoes...? LOL