Revised title: Question for Escorts and Clients on HIV Status.

[Michael Paul]

This is the original post to maintain the previously posted replies: Which was not received very well by some of the members. The use of the word " DEAL" caused an issue.

(Original )

How do you guys deal with a guy that is HIV+.... as an Escort I am educated on HIV and I am Poz Friendly. What if it were a reversed role too.. Would like to here from other escorts and clients.

 

(New Question)

This new question goes out to Clients and Escorts, who are either Negative or Positive. With today's advances in HIV medications for those living with HIV, which keeps the virus undetectable. As well as preventative PrEp for those that are negative. For clients, does status play a role in the hiring of an Escort? For Escorts, do you care to know a clients status?

 

It's my hope that no Escorts or Clients were harmed in the asking of this question....

[escortrod]

I don't 'deal with' openly poz guys any differently than anybody else. For many reasons discussed at length on the forums it's safest to assume that any client may be HIV+ and act accordingly.

[+ Eric Hassan]

How do you guys deal with a guy that is HIV+.... as an Escort I am educated on HIV and I am Poz Friendly. What if it were a reversed role too.. Would like to here from other escorts and clients.

 

I take my PrEP and mind my own business.

 

Also, as @escortrod pointed out, we don't "deal with" people with HIV. "Deal with" sounds like something that is difficult and that we don't really want to face. I know that's not how you intended to communicate - we're careful with our language here, so we might say "work with." I think what you mean to ask is how do you communicate to those living with HIV that you won't treat them any differently, and to that end I think you can put a statement on your profile that says "HIV+ friendly" or something similar. In my mind, you might even want to expand that to something that fits you and doesn't isolate HIV as the one thing you're cool about.

[BoyBerlin]

For those of us who are negative, choose to stay negative and practice safe sex wouldn't the best thing to do be treating every sexual encounter as if the sexual partner was HIV+?

[whipped guy]

I don't 'deal with' openly poz guys any differently than anybody else. For many reasons discussed at length on the forums it's safest to assume that any client may be HIV+ and act accordingly.

As a retired Heath care professional, that's the way it's done. Incidentally in the many years only one patient actually admitted to being HIV+ and he worked in the medical field as a lab technician. We had a perfectly fine relationship for many many years. I can't believe that he was the only poz person with whom I came in contact over so many years... I just took the same precautions for everyone who walked in the door and went on my merry way...

[Michael Paul]

I take my PrEP and mind my own business.

 

Also, as @escortrod pointed out, we don't "deal with" people with HIV. "Deal with" sounds like something that is difficult and that we don't really want to face. I know that's not how you intended to communicate - we're careful with our language here, so we might say "work with." I think what you mean to ask is how do you communicate to those living with HIV that you won't treat them any differently, and to that end I think you can put a statement on your profile that says "HIV+ friendly" or something similar. In my mind, you might even want to expand that to something that fits you and doesn't isolate HIV as the one thing you're cool about.

You are correct ...a bad choice of word... Still learning to choose my words correctly.

[+ pitman]

I always disclose my HIV status to prospective hires, and have never been rejected as a result of it. I would not want to put an escort in a position of being asked to do something he's not comfortable with, and feel more confident going into the encounter if I have fully disclosed in advance.

 

Woops! I meant prospective hires, not prospective clients. Corrected.

[+ oldNbusted]

I once posed a question an online acquaintance who had previously admitted he had unprotected sex with hook ups without asking about their status, asking him if he would do that with someone who had told him they were poz. He acted like it was a dumb question and said "Of course not!"

 

In that scenario, it was totally a psychologic thing, known vs unknown. As we talked, he admitted that it was very likely true he had unprotected sex with poz guys. He said he would start to act as if anyone was poz. This was after combo therapy was available, but before PrEP.

[Mocha]

Like I always say, there's far worse things out there than HIV. Not to say one person is better or less of or should feel ashamed to have something worse off.

 

There's intestinal parasites

There's herpes

There's HPV

Gonorrhea

Syphilis

Chlamydia

Hepatitis

E Coli

Crypto

Flu

cold

Virus

Strep

Staph

Athlete's foot

Ringworm

Diseases from other countries that are fatal..

 

 

Basically humans have been plagued with sickness and disease since the beginning of time. Best way to "deal" is to prevent, Clean, check, medicate. And avoid exposure to unsanitary conditions and drug use.

[+ José Soplanucas]

I get irritated every time I see the title for this thread. @Michael Paul , can you please edit the thread title?

[Mocha]

I get irritated every time I see the title for this thread. @Michael Paul , can you please edit the thread title?

 

DEAL WITH IT. DEAL? Deal. :-)

[Michael Paul]

I always disclose my HIV status to prospective hires, and have never been rejected as a result of it. I would not want to put an escort in a position of being asked to do something he's not comfortable with, and feel more confident going into the encounter if I have fully disclosed in advance.

 

Woops! I meant prospective hires, not prospective clients. Corrected.

It's nice to here what

I get irritated every time I see the title for this thread. @Michael Paul , can you please edit the thread title?

@latbear4blk ..I cannot change the title of my thread.... you can only edit the actual post. I have already told everyone I chose the wrong wording..

[whipped guy]

 

I cannot change the title of my thread.... It's not like I did it on purpose.. sorry.

It's possible to change the title, but you need a degree from MIT to do it. As the king of typos I have done it, but I don't presently recall how.

 

Please, let's cut @Michael Paul some slack... I'm sure others here have thought, said, or done worse things!!!! We don't come here to argue over such things!!!!

[Michael Paul]

It's possible to change the title, but you need a degree from MIT to do it. As the king of typos I have done it, but I don't presently recall how.

 

Please, let's cut @Michael Paul some slack... I'm sure others here have thought, said, or done worse things!!!! We don't come here to argue over such things!!!!

Thank You ...I feel like I should delete my post.

[Larstrup]

It's possible to change the title, but you need a degree from MIT to do it. As the king of typos I have done it, but I don't presently recall how.

 

Please, let's cut @Michael Paul some slack... I'm sure others here have thought, said, or done worse things!!!! We don't come here to argue over such things!!!!

 

It's easy to change the title of a thread. Simply click on edit and in the upper right-hand corner of the thread you'll see thread tools. Click on that and one of the options is edit thread title. Of course you have to be the OP. Personally I don't see the need to do it here.

[+ purplekow]

I once posed a question an online acquaintance who had previously admitted he had unprotected sex with hook ups without asking about their status, asking him if he would do that with someone who had told him they were poz. He acted like it was a dumb question and said "Of course not!"

 

In that scenario, it was totally a psychologic thing, known vs unknown. As we talked, he admitted that it was very likely true he had unprotected sex with poz guys. He said he would start to act as if anyone was poz. This was after combo therapy was available, but before PrEP.

 

Schrodinger's virus.

[Mocha]

Thank You ...I feel like I should delete my post.

 

Oh there's been far worst posts that never get deleted. By next week it'll be long forgotten. This is barely even scratching the surface. You didn't do anything wrong, if anything it helped address something and how to address something in the right context.

 

And I'm sure @latbear4blk didnt mean to make you feel out of place.

[whipped guy]

It's easy to change the title of a thread. Simply click on edit and in the upper right-hand corner of the thread you'll see thread tools. Click on that and one of the options is edit thread title. Of course you have to be the OP. Personally I don't see the need to do it here.

Yes, "thread tools" when you click edit... it all comes back now. Thanks! Still, likewise I don't see a pressing need to do it... much ado about not much...

[+ purplekow]

Michael Paul if you are going to post to this forum the skin needs to be as thick and leathery as that woman they nicknamed Tanning Mom. As you are an escort, some discretion is needed so as to avoid damaging customer relations but ultimately, with a bit of care, things will work out here.

[+ HornyRetiree]

I have just always assumed that every man I connect with sexually is HIV+ - It is my responsibility to protect myself and I do not ask or judge others by their status.

[MikeyGMin]

I think you can put a statement on your profile that says "HIV+ friendly" or something similar. In my mind, you might even want to expand that to something that fits you and doesn't isolate HIV as the one thing you're cool about

Excellent advice. If you isolate this one thing, some (many?) clients are going to turn that around and make assumptions about your own status. I have seen a statement similar to this in some profiles that I think is pretty cool.

 

"I am comfortable with men of any age, race, size or status." It's very welcoming.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Oh there's been far worst posts that never get deleted. By next week it'll be long forgotten. This is barely even scratching the surface. You didn't do anything wrong, if anything it helped address something and how to address something in the right context.

 

And I'm sure @latbear4blk didnt mean to make you feel out of place.

 

@Mocha knows me too well. Sorry if I made you feel extra bad @Michael Paul , it was not my intention. I am easy to irritate.

[mike carey]

I had a fair number of posts to read through here, and was intending to post the 'how to' of changing the title, but obviously others read the thread and posted that information. Two comments.

 

The title has the potential to be contentious (as demonstrated above) but now that it's been said I think it's useful to leave it as it is because of the discussion it has prompted both ways. If the title were changed now it would negate the purpose of the subsequent discussion.

 

'Deal with' works in two ways. One is the way most readers have taken it, poz guys are there, how do you deal with them as in how do you treat them. The other meaning is how do you manage your own internal reaction to them, and how do you cope. To me, 'dealing with' by internal reflection on what is involved is a positive way to approach an issue (no pun intended).

[nycguy]

Michael Paul if you are going to post to this forum the skin needs to be as thick and leathery as that woman they nicknamed Tanning Mom

 

That is certainly true!

[Michael Paul]

OP here ...Well...after some thought...I see no reason to change my title. I came to this forum to learn how to become better at what I do. Not to be scolded like a child. If grown men cannot get past a "Title".. we are all in trouble. It's as if I had ask my question in a hurtful way. It was an issue that I could not find trough several searches. Which means that had not been discussed. That in it's is troublesome to me. Found some on STD's, but nothing that directly pertained to a persons HIV status.

I'm an honest upfront type of guy. I treat everyone on the same playing field. I have no problems with ones status, body size, color of their skin, or age. It would be hypocritical of me to do so. I'm not perfect and do not portray myself in that manner. Nor do I live my life that way. I am about a real as it gets. My clients appreciate the fact that I do not pussy foot around with my words. Being older does not make me wiser, because in my life there is always room for improvement. Perhaps if you read my profile you will see, I am a good guy.

 

Now can we please just discuss the issue of one's HIV Status.... leaving the negativity at the door.