Paraphrasing Woody Allen

[Guest]

In case anyone's wondering how my mini-week in the Big Apple went, we went out for dinner on Wednesday. I picked an Italian restaurant near my hotel because he said he was vegan, and that restaurant had a number of vegan choices. Despite this, he picked a pasta with meat. He said his doctor told him he should eat more meat. We had a cup of hot chocolate (for me) and tea (for him) afterwards, and kissed openly in the cafe, and then quite passionately between the cafe and my hotel. Well, Friday I was to have dinner with my sister-in-law (and, as you may know, a tryst with that FTM escort right before--my sister-in-law may have wondered why I looked so glowing), but we were to get together Thursday and Saturday evening. He texted me on Thursday, though, telling me he was quite sick to his stomach, which he felt was because of the meat he ate. He said he couldn't meet me during the day on Saturday and Sunday (when I was flying home on a 5:30 PM flight), because he had to work both days to save up for a flight home to Puerto Rico for the holidays. I offered to pay him whatever income he would have missed on either of those days if he'd spend the day with me, but he refused, saying he would "feel like a prostitute" if he took me up on that offer. He again texted me on Saturday saying he was too sick to go to work or meet me--although he did add that he was picking his sister up from the airport. (Curiously, he did have NJ plates, which he explained by saying that he kept it registered at an old address to save money).

He did text me during my flight to ask if I had arrived safely, and I responded to him after I landed. He said he really liked me and hoped we could get together when he comes to California. He asked me if I was still interested in getting together and I said yes. All sort of strange, but I definitely felt as if there was some good chemistry. He constantly sends kissy-poo emojis and hearts when he texts. Of course, I wonder about the cancellations, though, and get the feeling of mixed messages. And, I have to admit that I wonder why such a handsome man would be so stricken by me. He certainly didn't seem to be after my money. Am I such a heart-throb?

I feel a song coming on...

[+ Truereview]

Thanks for the update, @Unicorn. I will admit that I noticed and cheered for you regarding the FTM experience, but my mind did wonder about this thread and its outcome. I luv closure!

 

I'm glad to hear you took a chance and our worst fears - ok, MY worst fear that he was a serial killer, turned out to be wrong.

 

The right answer on how you will deal with this will come to you. Personally, i try to take people at face value - not in a naive way- but just try to believe that what they say is a fact until proven otherwise. So I wouldn't read too much into his excuses and just move on as if it wasn't a big deal. I would also try to get out the exhausting game of "why me." Only he knows that, and if it is meant for you to know, it will come in time.

 

Hope you continue seeking arrangements that make you happy.

[Tonyko]

I, too, am glad it worked out for you and many of the fears were unfounded. Yes, you should just enjoy yourself. If he has an agenda you sound smart enough to know it if it appears. LOL I'm sure I don't have to familiarize ANYONE here with Eve Harrington and why ppl pass up opp's along the way that may come off as mercenary. "I want a run of the play contract"

[Rudynate]

I offered to pay him whatever income he would have missed on either of those days if he'd spend the day with me, but he refused, saying he would "feel like a prostitute" if he took me up on that offer.

 

Important clue as to why your relationships keep going off the rails.

[Guest]

Important clue as to why your relationships keep going off the rails.

Well, I would consider the first one, lasting over 13 years, a success in some measure (though the last few years weren't great). The next two were highly dysfunctional men. As I noted in my original post, I'm quite aware that my preference for men who are quite a bit younger than I am creates a major problem, and why sometimes I think that I "wouldn't join a club who would have me as a member," so to speak. But this man, while he definitely has some issues, at least is quite different in that he seems to have little interest in direct financial assistance. Although he has an unrelated degree, he's thinking of going back to a university for a nursing degree of some sort. Another strange thing about him is that, when I told him that I thought my latest beau may have had Asperger's, he mentioned that he was diagnosed with that as a child. I felt that very strange because he's definitely quite affectionate, which one wouldn't expect for someone with that diagnosis, and he's definitely not clumsy either (he's shown me photos of him going through obstacle courses), another trait characteristic of Asperger's.

[+ nycman]

Curiously, he did have NJ plates

 

Bing bing bing....callers please stop calling....we HAVE a WINNER!

 

I called it right....He's a NJ B&T fag.....nothing wrong with that....but he is. Trust me!

 

ok, MY worst fear that he was a serial killer, turned out to be wrong.

 

Turned out to be wrong....so far.

 

The "Vegan"...who suddenly starts downing a plate of pasta with meat....and then his sudden disappearance......

It doesn't add up and let's just say I'm not willing to rule out "serial killer" yet.

 

Stable and Consistent....he's not.

 

Serial Killer?....the jury is still out.

[+ Truereview]

Turned out to be wrong....so far.

 

The "Vegan"...who suddenly starts downing a plate of pasta with meat....and then his sudden disappearance......

It doesn't add up and let's just say I'm not willing to rule out "serial killer" yet.

 

Stable and Consistent....he's not.

 

Serial Killer?....the jury is still out.

LOL! Attention bottoms...

Someone needs to get laid...

I like you feisty like this.

[+ WilliamM]

@Unicorn Perhaps it would be better if you could not afford a house boy. I mean it sincerely. The houseboys will remain about the same age as you get older and older. Is that really how want to live the rest of your life. It is understood that you are not attracted to men your age. You are not the only one who feels that way.

 

Whatever happens, I wish you the best.

[+ nycman]

Someone needs to get laid...

 

Gentlemen..... Truereview is a man...who understands MEN.

[Guest]

Serial Killer?....the jury is still out.

 

Yeah, you were right about the NJ plates. I thought of you as I saw them. Well, I won't see him again unless he comes to California. Maybe they'll find me thrown off of some cliff... I feel a song coming on (sorry, but the cliff reference comes near the end).

[+ Gar1eth]

I'm curious. Is it any more risky than us meeting escorts we don't really know anything about even if they have reviews on here? King Cobra anyone?

 

Gman

 

Ok it's off the subject but I'm wondering whether I had/have early dementia. I vaguely recognize this post and the one or two others I have in this thread, but I was shocked to see the date of them was November 2016. When I saw the date, I thought, "Surely that post is from much longer ago-i.e. years ago." I was in Dallas for Thanksgiving when I posted those. I think it might have been very late/early in the morning as I was lying in bed just before sleep. I'm going to hope that's the reason I didn't consolidate the memories better-I didn't think about them a lot to form them up in my memory before sleeping.

 

Gman

[+ Gar1eth]

Yeah, you were right about the NJ plates. I thought of you as I saw them. Well, I won't see him again unless he comes to California. Maybe they'll find me thrown off of some cliff

 

I'm confused. Why were you looking for guys in NYC if you live in Cali?

 

Gman

[JayCeeKy]

And, I have to admit that I wonder why such a handsome man would be so stricken by me. He certainly didn't seem to be after my money.

 

I think I watched this episode on Dateline, or what it Forensic Files?

[+ Gar1eth]

Maybe they'll find me thrown off of some cliff... I feel a song coming on (sorry, but the cliff reference comes near the end).

 

Your use of this phrase put me in mind of a scene from the play Greater Tuna. For those not familiar with it, here is the link to the Wikipedia article on it

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greater_Tuna

 

When I first saw the play in the mid-1980's when I was about 23, I thought it was hilarious. I'm not sure if I still hold that opinion now. But on the other hand, I wasn't the only one to find it funny. HBO liked it enough to film it. I saw the play several times with the original actors ( who were also the authors) plus had the VHS tape of one of their performances. So while I may not remember what I had for breakfast this morning, or a post I made only a few short weeks ago in November of 2016, there are parts of this play that don't need much reminding to bring up from my memories.

 

In any case, this is a community production of it which does not seem as funny to me as it was with the original actors. To set it up-it's a funeral scene of a local judge that has recently died. One of the townspeople has come to mourn.

 

 

This is the entire play (with the original actors ) that was broadcast on HBO. It still isn't as funny as I remember it although funnier than the community theater production above . Maybe it's due to the fact that I'm 31 -32 years older than when I first saw it. Plus there may be differences between a live play and this HBO production. The funeral scene, if anyone is interested in looking at it, occurs at 23:52.

 

 

 

Gman

[kewtex]

Ok it's off the subject but I'm wondering whether I had/have early dementia. … I was in Dallas for Thanksgiving when I posted those.

 

It's not you, Dallas has that effect on people.

[Guest]

Turned out to be wrong....so far.

 

The "Vegan"...who suddenly starts downing a plate of pasta with meat....and then his sudden disappearance......

It doesn't add up and let's just say I'm not willing to rule out "serial killer" yet.

 

Stable and Consistent....he's not.

 

Serial Killer?....the jury is still out.

I'm confused. Why were you looking for guys in NYC if you live in Cali?

 

Well, I'm actually less concerned that this dude is a serial killer than my last two. At least this man's a functional member of society, which the other two were not. He sent me a note on houseboy.com, which I normally would have ignored since he lives across the country, but I decided to answer since I happened to be going that way (the trip was originally planned as a gift to my latest man, but when we broke up my ticket was not refundable, so I thought might as well). His story is that he grew up in Puerto Rico, and is getting tired of the winters in NYC, so is interested in relocating to more moderate climates. He wants to go back to college to get a nursing degree, something for which I could be helpful. I cannot believe that if it was his intention to kill me, that he would go to all this trouble, with very romantic kisses and frequent texts. I sent him a text this AM asking how things were in the Isla del Encanto, and he texted me back a picture of himself on the beach. Yes, I am concerned about some possible flakiness, but he's never asked me for a dime. He even protested when I paid for his meal. Maybe nothing will come of this, or maybe he's just another weirdo. But I might as well play this out. It's not like I'm shelling out $$, so it doesn't look like I'm being scammed so far.

[+ sniper]

I've known a couple of guys who were involved with much older men, and the younger guys were a bit, well, flighty I guess is the word. I think they found attraction in the stability. But I don't think either ended all that well. The one I know more about, the younger guy hit his mid-late-30s about the time the older one was retiring, and he sort of freaked out about his nearing 40 and not really having had the career he wanted, he just up and moved cross country and found a design job.

I think though maybe you should just be looking for the relationship first, not the situation. Look first for a younger guy who likes older men, make your affluence a nice bonus rather than the main attraction....

[Guest]

Well, on the subject of "Why me," there's a medical records employee at work who makes lunch for me most days. I've often wondered why I'm the only doctor she does that for. And I got more presents today at work from patients than most of my colleagues. That's clearly not because of my "affluence." I think people appreciate how genuine, honest, reliable, and dependable I am....

[+ sniper]

Well, on the subject of "Why me," there's a medical records employee at work who makes lunch for me most days. I've often wondered why I'm the only doctor she does that for. And I got more presents today at work from patients than most of my colleagues. That's clearly not because of my "affluence." I think people appreciate how genuine, honest, reliable, and dependable I am....

 

So then why sell yourself short by leading with the money? It's not all or even most of what you bring to the table.

[+ nycman]

I think people appreciate how genuine, honest, reliable, and dependable I am....

 

Either that...or you got a nice ass.

 

Grin

[Irtwo]

Unicorn, thanks for the update on this. Do you recommend houseboy.com as a site? Is that where you met the other guys as well?

[Guest]

So then why sell yourself short by leading with the money? It's not all or even most of what you bring to the table.

Unicorn, thanks for the update on this. Do you recommend houseboy.com as a site? Is that where you met the other guys as well?

 

 

I'm not sure I'm "leading with the money" other than the mere fact that I advertise on houseboy. My profile mentions my other qualities. As for recommending it as a site, most of the men advertising as houseboys are in their 20s, which isn't my preference. I'm guessing it would work better if you're looking for the younger set. But so far my experience has been that if a man is still going to be advertising as a houseboy in his 30s, then there may be something amiss, hence the title of this string. I don't know too many other websites where younger men are looking for older men, other than silverdaddies.com, and I've never connected with anyone from there (not for lack of trying). If there are other websites that other members know about which would be worth looking into, I'm all ears.

[Rudynate]

I know of one "Silver Daddies" success story. I have a friend who met a young guy thirty years younger than he. That was approx. 10 years ago and they're still together.

[+ honcho]

know of one "Silver Daddies" success story.

And, of course, there's the archetypical Christopher Isherwood and Don Bachardy . . .

[+ honcho]

I don't know too many other websites where younger men are looking for older men, other than silverdaddies.com, and I've never connected with anyone from there (not for lack of trying). If there are other websites that other members know about which would be worth looking into, I'm all ears.

 

www.daddydater.com

 

For what it's worth, I've met my current boyfriend on silverdaddies.com 8 years ago, and he is a younger man, but only by 6 months.