Playmate Body Shaming

[actor61]

A former Playboy Playmate could possibly face jail time for posting a picture of an older naked woman in a gym locker room on Snapchat with a caption to the effect, "I can't unsee this!". Per the news, she has been banned from all L.A. Fitness gyms and charges against her are being considered.

 

This is all so sad. When are we, both gay and straight people, going to stop entitling the very young and super attractive? Ryan Lochte perpetrates a criminal hoax in Rio but is now a contestant on Dancing with the Stars. It's a dubious honor, of course, but he's getting a pass for a shameful act. This bleached blond, silicone breasted bimbo at the gym takes a secret shot of an older lady changing in the locker room and then sends it out as though it were shameful to be old and at the gym, and she's going to get a huge chunk of free publicity even though it's pretty much negative. She thinks being old is shameful. I kind of think hanging your twat out for all to see in the pages of a men's magazine, as she has done, is kind of shameful too, but that's just me.

 

I'm a 64 year old professional dancer, still working. In fact, I open in a major revival of a musical tomorrow night. I take 4 to 5 classes a week. I'm 5'10", 155 pounds and in excellent shape. But I'm still 64 years old. My hair is very gray, I have lines around my mouth, a couple of bags under the eyes, and age spots on my arms and legs. For about the last 10 years, I've stopped taking showers or changing clothes in public locker or dressing rooms because I've seen the looks from the younger dancers, and heard the remarks, most of them along the lines of "People should know when to retire." Or "They should have classes just for the old guys." What I want to say to them is "Are you in a show at the moment? I am." or "Have you danced on Broadway? I've done 6 musicals in new York." or "Got your union card? I've had mine since 1959." But that's pompous, arrogant and mean and I don't want to go there, as tempting as it is!

 

What I would like to say to them and to the bitch who shuddered at the sight of an older woman at the gym is this: You'll be that age someday and no facelift, boob job, botox injection or hair dye will stop the process of time. And it feels like it happens in an instant. One day you're 34, and the next day you're 64. It happens, God willing, to everybody and you should be very grateful that you get the chance to age. And when you do, I hope you can drag your droopy ass and pendulous tits to the gym the way that lady you victimized did.

 

I have an 82 year old friend who hasn't been to a pool or a beach in 20 years because he's ashamed of his aging body. That's what cunts like the Playmate this morning do to people by being so callous about a normal process - they make people feel that they no longer have any right to exist after 40. That somehow a body that is no longer young but that has done its duty - given life, given love, worked, played, been sexual - is now past its sell by date and doesn't have the right to be seen in public. I am irate about this incident. This young woman's face is all over t.v. and the internet at the moment and I want to smack her into Tuesday, as my ancient father used to say. We HAVE to stop this ageism. We were all young once and we'll all be old someday and there is NO SHAME in any of it. I hope that old lady goes to the gym every day, just as I go to dance class, and I hope she continues to change in the locker room. I might even give up my misplaced shame now and start doing the same. I have a fantasy of standing naked in the changing room and saying to the young guys who think I should be invisible, 'Here's your future, fellas. Enjoy."

[bimbosavant]

I don't remember being so treacherous in my youth - in fact I remember looking up to my elders. The world is devolving. What a pity. I've been called old or "not THAT old" on occasion and I'm 37. I don't take it personally, though entitlement disgusts me more than anything else.

[Rudynate]

There are all kinds of ways in which older people subtly apologize for being old: feeling ashamed of their appearance without clothes, spending thousands of dollars getting cosmetic procedures, dying their hair, feeling out of place around younger people, etc., etc. In other words, they agree with the world at large that being old is something negative that needs to be covered up, concealed, excused.

 

Some people, though, are able to age without feeling like it is something they have to apologize for. I saw a great documentary the other day on Netflix, titled "Iris," about a 90+-year-old fashion icon named Iris Apfel. Everyone should watch it. Iris is 91 or 92 and still having the time of her life.

 

I enjoy hanging out with adults of any age - young college students to the old old. I'm sure there are people who harbor negative thoughts about me because I am well into my seventh decade, but as they say, "What you think of me is none of my business."

 

Believe me, if anyone knew how great this stage of life is, they would be lining up for it.

[actor61]

There are all kinds of ways in which older people subtly apologize for being old: feeling ashamed of their appearance without clothes, spending thousands of dollars getting cosmetic procedures, dying their hair, feeling out of place around younger people, etc., etc. In other words, they agree with the world at large that being old is something negative that needs to be covered up, concealed, excused.

 

Some people, though, are able to age without feeling like it is something they have to apologize for. I saw a great documentary the other day on Netflix, titled "Iris," about a 90+-year-old fashion icon named Iris Apfel. Everyone should watch it. Iris is 91 or 92 and still having the time of her life.

 

I enjoy hanging out with adults of any age - young college students to the old old. I'm sure there are people who harbor negative thoughts about me because I am well into my seventh decade, but as they say, "What you think of me is none of my business."

 

Believe me, if anyone knew how great this stage of life is, they would be lining up for it.

Here! Here! I'm mad at myself for allowing the negative comments about my age affect me so. You're absolutely right that we shouldn't apologize for being old and I'm going to embroider that on a pillow! Thank you for the wise words.

[MikeBiDude]

A former Playboy Playmate could possibly face jail time for posting a picture of an older naked woman in a gym locker room on Snapchat with a caption to the effect, "I can't unsee this!". Per the news, she has been banned from all L.A. Fitness gyms and charges against her are being considered.

 

This is all so sad. When are we, both gay and straight people, going to stop entitling the very young and super attractive? Ryan Lochte perpetrates a criminal hoax in Rio but is now a contestant on Dancing with the Stars. It's a dubious honor, of course, but he's getting a pass for a shameful act. This bleached blond, silicone breasted bimbo at the gym takes a secret shot of an older lady changing in the locker room and then sends it out as though it were shameful to be old and at the gym, and she's going to get a huge chunk of free publicity even though it's pretty much negative. She thinks being old is shameful. I kind of think hanging your twat out for all to see in the pages of a men's magazine, as she has done, is kind of shameful too, but that's just me.

 

I'm a 64 year old professional dancer, still working. In fact, I open in a major revival of a musical tomorrow night. I take 4 to 5 classes a week. I'm 5'10", 155 pounds and in excellent shape. But I'm still 64 years old. My hair is very gray, I have lines around my mouth, a couple of bags under the eyes, and age spots on my arms and legs. For about the last 10 years, I've stopped taking showers or changing clothes in public locker or dressing rooms because I've seen the looks from the younger dancers, and heard the remarks, most of them along the lines of "People should know when to retire." Or "They should have classes just for the old guys." What I want to say to them is "Are you in a show at the moment? I am." or "Have you danced on Broadway? I've done 6 musicals in new York." or "Got your union card? I've had mine since 1959." But that's pompous, arrogant and mean and I don't want to go there, as tempting as it is!

 

What I would like to say to them and to the bitch who shuddered at the sight of an older woman at the gym is this: You'll be that age someday and no facelift, boob job, botox injection or hair dye will stop the process of time. And it feels like it happens in an instant. One day you're 34, and the next day you're 64. It happens, God willing, to everybody and you should be very grateful that you get the chance to age. And when you do, I hope you can drag your droopy ass and pendulous tits to the gym the way that lady you victimized did.

 

I have an 82 year old friend who hasn't been to a pool or a beach in 20 years because he's ashamed of his aging body. That's what cunts like the Playmate this morning do to people by being so callous about a normal process - they make people feel that they no longer have any right to exist after 40. That somehow a body that is no longer young but that has done its duty - given life, given love, worked, played, been sexual - is now past its sell by date and doesn't have the right to be seen in public. I am irate about this incident. This young woman's face is all over t.v. and the internet at the moment and I want to smack her into Tuesday, as my ancient father used to say. We HAVE to stop this ageism. We were all young once and we'll all be old someday and there is NO SHAME in any of it. I hope that old lady goes to the gym every day, just as I go to dance class, and I hope she continues to change in the locker room. I might even give up my misplaced shame now and start doing the same. I have a fantasy of standing naked in the changing room and saying to the young guys who think I should be invisible, 'Here's your future, fellas. Enjoy."

And I'm often surprised by fellow client type posters saying "I'm too old for so-and-so unless I pay". Yes it's more difficult as we age to attract what we like. But in my sixth decade here and yes while I have the sags and marks of aging (and major weight loss), my confidence overshadows a lot of that....I'm having fun. And not ALL of my young gentleman friends are hired.

[+ glennnn]

The cruel Playboy bimbo will get hers, and sooner than she thinks. She is competing in a world where Andy Warhol's 15 minutes is a career. There is always someone younger, prettier, sexier, NEWER ready for their "career". Her payback includes watching herself fall apart day by day and coming to hate herself as much as she hates the older woman in the changing room for the sin of living. And she will have perfectly lighted, airbrushed images of her young self to contemplate and compare to the aging body she must live with.

 

I was a handsome enough youngster, I guess, with a tight gymnast's body. Never the handsomest, but attractive. I still have a little of that left, but I don't mourn what I have lost. I never " dined out" on my looks, or shunned those less attractive. I don't envy the beautiful; Vanity is a losing game. If all you care about is your youth and beauty, the second half of your life is going to be tough.

 

One more thing. This is related to why the best escorts, such as Rod Hagen among so many, are so wonderful, respected, and sought after. They see beyond the erosion of the years to the person inside. They make us forget age and just live. May life be good to them.

[actor61]

http://www.cbsnews.com/videos/playboy-playmate-may-face-jail-time-for-body-shaming-snapchat-post/

[Rudynate]

And I'm often surprised by fellow client type posters saying "I'm too old for so-and-so unless I pay".

 

They haven't given the other guy the opportunity to reject them, they already did it themselves.

[+ Funguy]

A former Playboy Playmate could possibly face jail time for posting a picture of an older naked woman in a gym locker room on Snapchat with a caption to the effect, "I can't unsee this!". Per the news, she has been banned from all L.A. Fitness gyms and charges against her are being considered.

 

This is all so sad. When are we, both gay and straight people, going to stop entitling the very young and super attractive? Ryan Lochte perpetrates a criminal hoax in Rio but is now a contestant on Dancing with the Stars. It's a dubious honor, of course, but he's getting a pass for a shameful act. This bleached blond, silicone breasted bimbo at the gym takes a secret shot of an older lady changing in the locker room and then sends it out as though it were shameful to be old and at the gym, and she's going to get a huge chunk of free publicity even though it's pretty much negative. She thinks being old is shameful. I kind of think hanging your twat out for all to see in the pages of a men's magazine, as she has done, is kind of shameful too, but that's just me.

 

I'm a 64 year old professional dancer, still working. In fact, I open in a major revival of a musical tomorrow night. I take 4 to 5 classes a week. I'm 5'10", 155 pounds and in excellent shape. But I'm still 64 years old. My hair is very gray, I have lines around my mouth, a couple of bags under the eyes, and age spots on my arms and legs. For about the last 10 years, I've stopped taking showers or changing clothes in public locker or dressing rooms because I've seen the looks from the younger dancers, and heard the remarks, most of them along the lines of "People should know when to retire." Or "They should have classes just for the old guys." What I want to say to them is "Are you in a show at the moment? I am." or "Have you danced on Broadway? I've done 6 musicals in new York." or "Got your union card? I've had mine since 1959." But that's pompous, arrogant and mean and I don't want to go there, as tempting as it is!

 

What I would like to say to them and to the bitch who shuddered at the sight of an older woman at the gym is this: You'll be that age someday and no facelift, boob job, botox injection or hair dye will stop the process of time. And it feels like it happens in an instant. One day you're 34, and the next day you're 64. It happens, God willing, to everybody and you should be very grateful that you get the chance to age. And when you do, I hope you can drag your droopy ass and pendulous tits to the gym the way that lady you victimized did.

 

I have an 82 year old friend who hasn't been to a pool or a beach in 20 years because he's ashamed of his aging body. That's what cunts like the Playmate this morning do to people by being so callous about a normal process - they make people feel that they no longer have any right to exist after 40. That somehow a body that is no longer young but that has done its duty - given life, given love, worked, played, been sexual - is now past its sell by date and doesn't have the right to be seen in public. I am irate about this incident. This young woman's face is all over t.v. and the internet at the moment and I want to smack her into Tuesday, as my ancient father used to say. We HAVE to stop this ageism. We were all young once and we'll all be old someday and there is NO SHAME in any of it. I hope that old lady goes to the gym every day, just as I go to dance class, and I hope she continues to change in the locker room. I might even give up my misplaced shame now and start doing the same. I have a fantasy of standing naked in the changing room and saying to the young guys who think I should be invisible, 'Here's your future, fellas. Enjoy."

 

BRAVO! Actor61

 

I'm 68, I've been around a long time, and I'm not ashamed of my body - It's better than a lot of 50 year olds that I know. I'll be at a pool, beach, etc. BUT NOT WITH A SPEEDO. Regular trunks for me and I'll flaunt it!

[gallahadesquire]

It's fun watching the variety of ages in the locker room at the gym. It seems the most self-conscious are the mid-to-late-teens who aren't as buff as their buds [still, nothing to cry over!]. Fortunately, I have sensed few assholes. Maybe because it's a relatively upscale gym in an upper class town.

 

The older fellows don't seem particularly embarrassed either. My trainer told me, "Don't be surprised the first time you see someone put his leg on the [hair dryer] bench, and dry his perineum off." It was a bit odd.

 

Now that I think of it, there are two changing areas. The Young Bucks tend towards one, and the Old Dudes towards the other. I use the Old Dude one if I'm swimming, because it's a shorter walk to the pool, but if I'm just leaving my jacket, I'll do it in the front one.

 

SO maybe body shaming isn't so prevalent as we think. It does seems to be a local, societal norm.

[+ quoththeraven]

So does this mean we won't be subjected to more bodyshaming and ageshaming threads in this forum?

 

Not very realistic, I know, but a girl can dream.

[Reluctant Daddy]

And I'm often surprised by fellow client type posters saying "I'm too old for so-and-so unless I pay". Yes it's more difficult as we age to attract what we like.

 

I'm trying to get over this mindset but find it difficult as hell. Working on confidence, and thanks to a couple of wonderful hires, have been building it. My fear is trying it beyond the "unless I pay" wall. I don't think it would take much to crumble all I've built.

[+ Truereview]

@actor61 , although I empathize with your being irate and with most of the feelings in your post, I cannot bring myself to like it. I just can't do so when your word choices are filled with such venom. It is shameful to see a gifted writer like yourself (who can storytell like no other) shame back a woman who has made an error in judgment. Im not cutting her a break, what she did is shameful, but your word choices just leave me baffled and steal away the power of your post. I know (think?) you are better than this.

 

That's what cunts like the Playmate this morning do to people by being so callous about a normal process -

This bleached blond, silicone breasted bimbo at the gym takes a secret shot of an older lady

What I would like to say to them and to the bitch who shuddered at the sight of an older woman

I kind of think hanging your twat out for all to see in the pages of a men's magazine

[Rudynate]

I'm trying to get over this mindset but find it difficult as hell. Working on confidence, and thanks to a couple of wonderful hires, have been building it. My fear is trying it beyond the "unless I pay" wall. I don't think it would take much to crumble all I've built.

 

 

Building self-confidence doesn't mean you become impervious to disappointment. You experience it and move on.

[+ quoththeraven]

@actor61 , although I empathize with your being irate and with most of the feelings in your post, I cannot bring myself to like it. I just can't do so when your word choices are filled with such venom. It is shameful to see a gifted writer like yourself (who can storytell like no other) shame back a woman who has made an error in judgment. Im not cutting her a break, what she did is shameful, but your word choices just leave me baffled and steal away the power of your post. I know (think?) you are better than this.

 

I "liked" the post because I am fed up with body and age shaming. But I agree with the point TR has made about some of the language used being unnecessarily harsh or, in the case of an appearance in Playboy, almost certainly incorrect.

 

As far as I know (including from personal observation), Playboy never featured explicit nudity of the type seen in porn. The most seen was some pubic hair. Therefore, it is more or less inconceivable that a Playboy Playmate's twat was exposed in a photoshoot. That kind of thing was more Hustler's thing.

 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pubic_Wars

 

In fact, Playboy now has a "no nudity" policy, presumably because it can't compete with all the "free" porn on the internet.

[+ SundayZip]

So does this mean we won't be subjected to more bodyshaming and ageshaming threads in this forum?

 

Not very realistic, I know, but a girl can dream.

 

Hey QT... I'm usually right there with you on 99% of what you post, but I'm not sure I get this. Is there really body shaming and age shaming in this forum? I see lots of discussion and admiration of escorts with young, hard bodies, but I never thought of this as body or age shaming. Is there something else I'm missing? Sometimes I can be pretty oblivious.

[+ Truereview]

Hey QT... I'm usually right there with you on 99% of what you post, but I'm not sure I get this. Is there really body shaming and age shaming in this forum? I see lots of discussion and admiration of escorts with young, hard bodies, but I never thought of this as body or age shaming. Is there something else I'm missing? Sometimes I can be pretty oblivious.

I think there have been some threads body-shaming escorts who are less than "average looking" and who are charging average or more than average rates - and some of us poking fun at their "distorted" view of reality. Also, we do tend to glorify and drool all over ourselves for perfect bodies and faces - I'm way guilty of this!- and that groupthink can often lead to an unrealistic view of beauty.

 

That's my guess at what QTR was referring to. Just guessing, and I'm sure QTR will correct me if I'm off.

[Epigonos]

As I’ve stated many time on many different threads on this site I’m 74 and there isn’t a damn thing I can or want to do about it. We seniors, I really don’t like that categorizing word; can ONLY be marginalized if WE allow ourselves to be. Why should I, or for that matter the woman in the photograph, care what some twenty something dumb ass bimbo or himbo thinks of us. Additionally, if the subjects face is recognizable in the photograph the bimbo has opened herself up to a major law suit.

 

My mirror, my eyes and my body have always determined what I did and what I do wear. When I was 26 years old I had 11¾ -inch arms and I NEVER wore short sleeve shirts; when I was 36 years old I had 18-inch arms and I NEVER wore long sleeve shirts; now I’m about to be 76 and I wear whatever I damn well please. One day when I was 26 I was going to the beach with a group of friends and I put on a speedo bathing suit; I looked into the mirror and immediately said to myself this isn’t me. I took off the speedo and put on a boxer type bathing suit and happily when to the beach. Now if I go into the pool at the Palm Springs Pool Party I wear nothing.

 

I used to tell my students that: 1.) When we were small children we did what and wore what the adult in our lives wanted. 2.) When we became adolescents we did what and wore what our peers wanted, and 3.) When we became adult we did what and wore what we wanted. Unfortunately some people never go beyond stage 1 and some never go beyond stage 2.

 

Frankly people at all stages of our lives in this society and that includes “seniors”, spend far too much time worrying about what others thing of us. I have finally reached a stage in my life where my attitude, excluding a small group of family and friends, is fuck’m

Edited September 10, 2016 by Epigonos

[+ quoththeraven]

Hey QT... I'm usually right there with you on 99% of what you post, but I'm not sure I get this. Is there really body shaming and age shaming in this forum? I see lots of discussion and admiration of escorts with young, hard bodies, but I never thought of this as body or age shaming. Is there something else I'm missing? Sometimes I can be pretty oblivious.

 

Not so much about specific escorts, although it has happened on occasion, but in terms of general criticism of people who are fat/overweight as lazy, unattractive, and a drain on our healthcare system, sometimes complete with photos. Then there's all the handwringing about how older gents can only find partners (or partners who meet their criteria for attractiveness, which is a rant for a different day) by hiring escorts and how terrible it must be for escorts to have so many older, overweight, unattractive clients.

[+ bashful]

If I heard it once from my mother, I heard it a million times. Respect your elders. That women had no respect for her elder, and given what she did, I doubt she has much respect for many other human beings. Don't understand why would Playboy personify such an insensitive woman as beautiful.

Edited September 9, 2016 by bashful

[+ SundayZip]

Not so much about specific escorts, although it has happened on occasion, but in terms of general criticism of people who are fat/overweight as lazy, unattractive, and a drain on our healthcare system, sometimes complete with photos. Then there's all the handwringing about how older gents can only find partners (or partners who meet their criteria for attractiveness, which is a rant for a different day) by hiring escorts and how terrible it must be for escorts to have so many older, overweight, unattractive clients.

 

Hmmm... I see what you mean. Especially about statements that it must be terrible for escorts to have older, overweight, unattractive clients.

[actor61]

@actor61 , although I empathize with your being irate and with most of the feelings in your post, I cannot bring myself to like it. I just can't do so when your word choices are filled with such venom. It is shameful to see a gifted writer like yourself (who can storytell like no other) shame back a woman who has made an error in judgment. Im not cutting her a break, what she did is shameful, but your word choices just leave me baffled and steal away the power of your post. I know (think?) you are better than this.

You're absolutely right. I got carried away and became way too vitriolic. My sentiments haven't changed but my choice of words is very poor. Thanks for pointing it out. I'm usually much classier than that! But she just had me hopping mad!!!

[Phil_musc]

Ah, actor, I read your initial post and thought how right you were. The language didn't not put me off (I scarcely noticed it, having become inured to rough speech) until I read what others have said. Going back and re-reading what you wrote, I understand the subsequent posters point. Nevertheless, it does not diminish the fundamental truth of what you have said. Thank you for your honest rant - you sound like someone I would like to know. I wish we could stick this post at the top of the Lounge - we all need a little reminder about this serious business of aging and how to have a perspective on it that is affirming.

[+ bashful]

I understand Actors's outrage. In addition to privacy laws, there are Elder Abuse laws on the books, such as:

 

Emotional Abuse—inflicting mental pain, anguish, or distress on an elder person through verbal or nonverbal acts, e.g. humiliating, intimidating, or threatening.

 

I hope there's a good District/State's Attorney where it happened, and the victim finds a good attorney for the civil matter.

Edited September 11, 2016 by bashful

[samhexum]

If I heard it once from my mother, I heard it a million times. Respect your elders.