Strip club ettiquette, help!!!

[Lab12]

I am hoping to go to a strip for the second time. I am an awfully shy bloke and a bit socially awkward, hence the first time I went, I did not know my left from my right and the dancers seemed too busy with other customers who knew how to get their attention, I left without any action. Can you guys help with suggestions as to how to get the attention of the dancers, what to do and what not to do in the back et cetera.

[samandtham]

If you can tell us the specific club you're trying to go to, I'm sure the regulars here would have more specific pieces of advice.

 

The best way to get a guy's attention is to come up to him and strike up a conversation. I understand that you're a shy guy, but you have an almost 0 percent chance of getting shot down, compared to, well, going to a bar and trying to talk to a "regular" guy. At worst, the dancer you're talking to has another customer that he has to attend to. In which case, just say "cool" and talk to him again when you see him available.

[Lab12]

On friday, I plan on going to Boxers and Briefs in St. Louis and the following weekend I will be in Miami, so twist and The Floppy Rooster

[mattr]

Depends on the club but for a shy person who may not want to approach a dancer, eye contact with a little smile will usually encourage the dancer to approach you. Remember, these guys are looking for men who will give them money so a newbie can be an attractive prospect. If there is a stage where they are dancing, slipping a couple of singles into a dancers shorts, a pat on the butt, and some eye contact will often lead to the dancer seeking you out after his set is over. Also, once approached, telling the dancer that you are a newbie will either lead to him trying to make you feel comfortable or him trying to take advantage of you so learn the protocol of the club you are visiting, and make sure that you settle money issues before you start a lapdance or any other personal engagement. When a dancer approaches you and you chat a bit and cop a feel, make sure you tip him a couple of bucks even if you are not ready to engage in a lapdance. Believe me, other dancers will notice and will come by and try to get you to seal the deal with them. There is a lot of threads giving advice on here so peruse the forums. Remember to be careful with your wallet, phone, etc. Early on I had my iphone stolen by a dancer and on a different night my wallet cleaned out by a dancer. In the latter case he helpfully "found my wallet on the floor" after our dance and returned it to me. I reported the incident to management and they apprehended the offending dancer and while I did not get the money back from the dancer, management reimbursed me for some of the money that was stolen and gave me some free passes for the club. I wasn't made whole but pretty close and I chalked the loss up to another learning experience.

[+ BOZO T CLOWN]

Can you guys help with suggestions as to how to get the attention of the dancers...

 

Yeah. Tape a $100 bill to your forehead. That should do it.

 

Bozo

[bigvalboy]

Yeah. Tape a $100 bill to your forehead. That should do it.

 

Bozo

 

LOL...Bozo is exactly right.

[ericwinters]

Yeah. Tape a $100 bill to your forehead. That should do it.

 

Bozo

tape $200 for a guarantee!

[geoffk]

mattr great advice here for someone new that has isnt sure. the sarcastic comments from otherrs arent funny and obviously not helpful.

 

As to money i keep it in my front pants pocket not in my wallet. take anything you don't need out of your wallet before you go. Maybe just take your license and one cr card.

 

Even if a dancer is talking to someone else you can still say hi and talk to me later. staring and checking the guy out obviously helps too.

 

All this being said sometimes the dancers are more interested in conversing with each other than talking to customers and earning money. Hard to believe but i have seen this. There's not much you can do about this.

[+ pdxleo]

Keep your wallet firmly in the back pocket - I usually load my ones into one front pocket, tens and twenties in the other. When you buy your drinks, be sure the change goes into the appropriate pocket! At Boxers, you're gonna pay a cover charge in the foyer, tip the doorman a buck or two. Drinks there are min $5 for a beer, mixed alcohol higher, again tip the bartender (John if you're lucky) one or two bucks, will pay off later in the evening. If you get there early enough, get a seat at the bar- the boys work their 20 mins almost exclusively on the bar top, unless the place is packed - then the stage off to the right side comes into play. A warm smile and a couple ones into the socks will get the dancer to at least say "thanks", I have always found that they are interested if you mention that you are from out-of-town. Get a reasonably coherent guy to explain the room prices, the kids who are already on their way to intoxication make a fine mess of it! Remember they need a break after their set is up, they may or may not be out to mingle right away. If you find one you like, ask about the lap dance stalls ( the VIP Room may be a bit advanced for a first visit ) and be sure you understand the price per song, and the cameras will be fully policed by management on a weekend night so pay attention to the rules list! The bartender collects the room fee and hands out the timer - see tipping the bartender early! Even I, not an amateur, have had to pay a bar fine for inappropriate behavior in the back- can add up fast! Do yourself a favor, remember the name Caleb- he will make your night one to remember, no matter if you are shy or rambunctious!

 

Rooster on a weekend involves paying for parking as well as a $20 cover, drinks are in the average range for Miami ( a sponsored alcohol distributors event can mean much lower prices, take advantage) It tends to fill later in the evening, so the start of the night can be slow. Dancers do a three-song set, usually get nude during the second song later in the evening, may keep the clothes on for longer earlier in the evening; I have had dancers tell me that they are not supposed to go nude until they have collected a certain amount of tips, so if you see someone intriguing early, a few bucks in tips may go a long way. Usually working the stage in pairs, if you like one but not the other it's not a big problem to tip just one (myself I spread the wealth, but that's just me). Rooster's guys are more built, Latin, and can be English-challenged, altho there have been a more varied mix my last few times. The room is smallish and oddly shaped, with the double stage crowding the space- you will have to manoeuver about to get from seat to stage to bar. If you like one, be sure to be clear about how many songs you want in the lap dance room - the room fees are posted, but the "misunderstandings" about the number of songs can be avoided by a couple minutes conversation. Remember it is "off-season" so some of the guys may be a little more aggressive, don't be afraid to say "maybe a little later" if he's coming on too strong.

 

Twist is on my agenda for next month's visit, so I have no advice- have heard it's more dance-clubby, but who knows?

 

Just remember, everyone has had a first time, it's just a processing of feeling out the limits and having a good attitude. Friendly people make friends faster, no one wants to hang around a dull Jack. Nuthin' to be ascared of, friend- in the end, they're just guys making a living, like we all do!

[+ pdxleo]

BTW sometimes a wing man can be a great guide, keep an eye on the Forums for guys with your interests. I've had hella fun in the past meeting other forum members and going out on excursions while traveling!

[+ Truereview]

Isn't boxers & briefs in Illinois? Or did they move it to STL? I got lost driving from STL to this place (got off at the wrong exit) and ended up in a very seedy area - I truly feared for my life. It seems like it is in the middle of nowhere - very dark roads. However, once I found my way and got there, the crowd was quite friendly.

 

For strip joints, my preference is to carry my ID and 1 credit card securely deep in one front pocket. I put my large bills in the front left pocket & my tipping $ in my right. I never carry a wallet in these places and never put anything in my back pocket. best thing is to smile broadly and just have a good time - dancers who see you being openly friendly and chill will actually chat you up for hours without worrying about tips.

 

Twist is more of a club. Here is a recent thread. Check out the search engine here and there are several threads about it.

I completely agree with @pdxleo that finding a buddy to go with would be great. Lots of great locals here that might come along with ya. ENJOY and report back!

[Lab12]

Keep your wallet firmly in the back pocket - I usually load my ones into one front pocket, tens and twenties in the other. When you buy your drinks, be sure the change goes into the appropriate pocket! At Boxers, you're gonna pay a cover charge in the foyer, tip the doorman a buck or two. Drinks there are min $5 for a beer, mixed alcohol higher, again tip the bartender (John if you're lucky) one or two bucks, will pay off later in the evening. If you get there early enough, get a seat at the bar- the boys work their 20 mins almost exclusively on the bar top, unless the place is packed - then the stage off to the right side comes into play. A warm smile and a couple ones into the socks will get the dancer to at least say "thanks", I have always found that they are interested if you mention that you are from out-of-town. Get a reasonably coherent guy to explain the room prices, the kids who are already on their way to intoxication make a fine mess of it! Remember they need a break after their set is up, they may or may not be out to mingle right away. If you find one you like, ask about the lap dance stalls ( the VIP Room may be a bit advanced for a first visit ) and be sure you understand the price per song, and the cameras will be fully policed by management on a weekend night so pay attention to the rules list! The bartender collects the room fee and hands out the timer - see tipping the bartender early! Even I, not an amateur, have had to pay a bar fine for inappropriate behavior in the back- can add up fast! Do yourself a favor, remember the name Caleb- he will make your night one to remember, no matter if you are shy or rambunctious!

 

Rooster on a weekend involves paying for parking as well as a $20 cover, drinks are in the average range for Miami ( a sponsored alcohol distributors event can mean much lower prices, take advantage) It tends to fill later in the evening, so the start of the night can be slow. Dancers do a three-song set, usually get nude during the second song later in the evening, may keep the clothes on for longer earlier in the evening; I have had dancers tell me that they are not supposed to go nude until they have collected a certain amount of tips, so if you see someone intriguing early, a few bucks in tips may go a long way. Usually working the stage in pairs, if you like one but not the other it's not a big problem to tip just one (myself I spread the wealth, but that's just me). Rooster's guys are more built, Latin, and can be English-challenged, altho there have been a more varied mix my last few times. The room is smallish and oddly shaped, with the double stage crowding the space- you will have to manoeuver about to get from seat to stage to bar. If you like one, be sure to be clear about how many songs you want in the lap dance room - the room fees are posted, but the "misunderstandings" about the number of songs can be avoided by a couple minutes conversation. Remember it is "off-season" so some of the guys may be a little more aggressive, don't be afraid to say "maybe a little later" if he's coming on too strong.

 

Twist is on my agenda for next month's visit, so I have no advice- have heard it's more dance-clubby, but who knows?

 

Just remember, everyone has had a first time, it's just a processing of feeling out the limits and having a good attitude. Friendly people make friends faster, no one wants to hang around a dull Jack. Nuthin' to be ascared of, friend- in the end, they're just guys making a living, like we all do!

So if you don't mind me asking, what is considered appropriate and Inappropriate behavior? forgive my ignorance.

[+ poolboy48220]

It really varies. I always go slow and try to pay attention to body language from the dancer. If you put your hand on their back and they don't flinch, move it down lower; and so on.

 

What a couple have mentioned, about tipping the guy when he's on stage and making eye contact while you do so, is almost always a good icebreaker. It just lets him know you're interested.

[+ nycman]

This thread reminds me of a visit the Gaiety in NYC when I was a baby....

 

David "Angel Wings" was dancing on the stage.....

 

I was enthralled and I slipped a $20 bill into his socks.

 

He preceded to straddle my seat and whisper in my ear..."I will find YOU later"....

 

He did

 

We did.

 

And I still remember it more than 20 years later....grin

[Guy Fawkes]

First you need a bill; Remember the bigger the bill, the bigger the thrill.

 

See what bills are showing up in their straps. Go one domination larger. Hold the bill in front of them and slowly wave it back and forth until you have their attention. Once they are smiling at you, very carefully place the bill in their strap.

 

Now reach up slowly with your hands and wash that dirty, nasty money dust off on their abs.

 

If that doesn't work for you; Come to Las Vegas on a Wednesday night and Daddy will give you up close and personal instruction at Charlie's Underwear night starting at about 10pm.

 

They know how to treat a customer and they'll tend to make an appearance at the table after their set. You on your own for private dances; I've don't have any experience.

 

I am hoping to go to a strip for the second time. I am an awfully shy bloke and a bit socially awkward, hence the first time I went, I did not know my left from my right and the dancers seemed too busy with other customers who knew how to get their attention, I left without any action. Can you guys help with suggestions as to how to get the attention of the dancers, what to do and what not to do in the back et cetera.

[Lab12]

First you need a bill; Remember the bigger the bill, the bigger the thrill.

 

See what bills are showing up in their straps. Go one domination larger. Hold the bill in front of them and slowly wave it back and forth until you have their attention. Once they are smiling at you, very carefully place the bill in their strap.

 

Now reach up slowly with your hands and wash that dirty, nasty money dust off on their abs.

 

If that doesn't work for you; Come to Las Vegas on a Wednesday night and Daddy will give you up close and personal instruction at Charlie's Underwear night starting at about 10pm.

 

They know how to treat a customer and they'll tend to make an appearance at the table after their set. You on your own for private dances; I've don't have any experience.

 

Thanks, I will take you up on that offer when I come to Las Vegas!!!

[fedssocr1]

I think observing others goes a long way to learning the ropes. Strip clubs can be great for people watching in general. I tend to also be relatively "shy". In my case I am ALWAYS approached by the dancers in whom I have the least interest. And the ones I want tend to be difficult to get the attention of.

 

It can be tough but if you see a customer who appears to attract the attention of all the dancers either try to strike up a conversation and ask them how things work at that particular club or just watch them closely. They might be able to introduce you to whoever it is you want to meet. I feel like those gregarious kinds of people are happy to explain things to you.

 

Eye contact and a smile will certainly help. Being there when things are a little slower and less crowded will also make it easier to get attention.

 

Set a budget and stick to it. These guys are generally very good at separating people from their money. Don't allow yourself to get railroaded into anything. If you're not interested in a dancer who approaches you just say so. I find the direct approach works best. A simple "no thanks" usually does the trick. Saying "maybe later" is just an invitation for them to come back later. In Thai gogo bars I am always amazed by the guys who allow themselves to be taken advantage of. Always count the songs with the dancer if you are doing lap dances and paying by the song. That way there won't be any surprises at the end.

[Irtwo]

In my case I am ALWAYS approached by the dancers in whom I have the least interest. And the ones I want tend to be difficult to get the attention of.

 

Yep, that's often the case.

[baltimore observer]

This thread reminds me of a visit the Gaiety in NYC when I was a baby....

 

David "Angel Wings" was dancing on the stage.....

 

I was enthralled and I slipped a $20 bill into his socks.

 

He preceded to straddle my seat and whisper in my ear..."I will find YOU later"....

 

He did

 

We did.

 

And I still remember it more than 20 years later....grin

 

I also remember Dave Angelo, in NYC and in Montreal - a great dancer, and he helped other dancers.

[+ Robster]

I also remember Dave Angelo, in NYC and in Montreal - a great dancer, and he helped other dancers.

Wait, Dave Angelo, who did a couple of scenes for COLT? I didn't realize that's who nycman was talking about. No wonder he was enthralled!

 

Rob

[+ nycman]

Wait, Dave Angelo, who did a couple of scenes for COLT? I didn't realize that's who nycman was talking about. No wonder he was enthralled!

 

Rob

 

Yep that's him. I didn't realize he used Angelo as his last name...lol

I did a Google gay porn search to confirm that's him.

I just knew him as "David Angel Wings".

Really sweet guy who was very nice to a very young nycman.

[Lab12]

feedback; So i went to boxers n briefs in East St. Louis on Friday night and I did not really enjoy myself that much. To begin with, there were no fit blokes, I guess my expectations were too high. I sat there grinning and smiling sheepishly to the drag show (literally a drag) going on. One of the dancers with a rather large and distended abdomen (in comparison to his skinny and miniature body) sat by me and started a conversation by saying "among all the dancers here I am the cutest" and me being the socially awkward sarcastic scientist, without hesitation, said " yeah, mate, you are the fairest in the land, but there is one even more fairer than you...all of the other dancers" he got up and left before i could apologise for being such an arsehole. There was this guy who looked a bit nice but was too into himself, he had the narcissus disease, when he was not on stage dancing, he will stand in front of one of the numerous mirrors in club checking himself out, flexing or dancing. I doubt taping a $100 bill to my forehead would have helped with him and that was very interesting to watch. I asked a customer who seemed to know his way around and told me most of the cute dancers were not there that night. I eventually left but before i did I gave $50 to the dancer that I was an arsehole to as a form of apology. so that is my rather uneventful night. I am going to wait to experience a better strip club in a bigger or tourist oriented city before i decide whether strip clubs are my thing or not but for now boxers n briefs is just not my thing.

[Irtwo]

" yeah, mate, you are the fairest in the land, but there is one even more fairer than you...all of the other dancers".

 

Ouch! Lol.

[Lab12]

Ouch! Lol.

Yeah i felt pretty bad lol

[+ nycman]

So i went to boxers n briefs in East St. Louis.

 

I see the problem......