Dildo Directions

[Will]

If this question has ever appeared on this board, I don't remember it and apologize in advance if there's a thread of which I ought to be aware. Thus, I turn for advice from clients and escorts alike, as bottoming knows no bounds.

 

A friend of mine (I'm not kidding) lives in a remote part of the Deep South, where it is not only dangerous to be out, it is even dangerous to receive mail with a suspicious return address. So because I'm going to see him in a couple of weeks, he's asked me to make a purchase that I can then hand off to him. He wants a dildo.

 

I went online by clicking on the "Poppers & Toys" link at the top here, but was confused by the sheer variety of style, to say nothing of size, of the dildos for sale. There are inflatable dildos; there are straight dildos and curved dildoes; there are smooth dildos and dildos with bumps; there are dildos shaped like cigar tubes, dildos shaped like a regular dick, and dildos in the image of famous dicks. There are rubber dildos and pyrex dildos and latex dildos. Some dildos are narrow at the tip and widen towards the end, while other dildos, like bombs, are bulbous at the top and narrow at the bottom.

 

I don't know (a) what kind of dildo to buy or (b) what size. If it helps, my friend is no stranger to bottoming, although he is usually the top.

 

What's a first-time shopper to do? Ask for advice from those who are more advanced in the anal arts than I. Comments, suggestions, even shopping lists -- all would be welcome and gratefully received.

[Rick Munroe]

Will, kind of an obvious (and maybe dumb) answer, but why don't you ask your friend exactly what kind he wants, after explaining to him about all the different types there are? I mean, isn't it a personal thing?

 

Now, if you want to get me one for Chanukah, check and see if they have any tongue-shaped ones.

[Guest Mikel]

Perfect response...the logical one.

 

Also, I'm willing to let my tongue be used as the "cast" or "mold"...it won't disappoint!

[+ Lucky]

I agree that Rick's response is perfect. Your frined should look online, find wht he wants, and then tell you so that you can discreetly purchase it. Perhaps you can even demonstrate its use to him!

 

You may find that several dildos will be needed in increasing sizes. Many people find that once they get used to the idea, bigger dildos seem much more attractive than the starter ones. Not that I would know...

[Will]

As a matter of fact, I just spoke with him and he says that he wants a "standard" one and a "bigger" one, so he's already on Lucky's wave-length. The difficulty is that English is not this guy's first language and he speaks it with some difficulty. And when we're trying to communicate over the telephone, it isn't always easy to understand each other. Now that he's ordered regular and large, I can sort of figure out the size. But I still don't know straight or curved, rubber or latex, etc. This is something I have to figure out. He says he knows I will buy "the best," and leaves it at that.

[+ Lucky]

For what it is worth, he may want to start with a butt plug. See following instructions:

 

How To Have Anal Sex (masturbation)

From Anne Semans,

Your Guide to Sexuality.

 

The anus is full of sensitive nerve endings that feel great when stimulated by a finger, toy, tongue, or penis. Before you explore anal sex with a partner, it's wise to practice anal masturbation first. Once inserted, a butt plug will feel good against a man’s prostate, and it can also indirectly stimulate a woman’s G spot since the wall between the vagina and the anus is so thin.

Difficulty: Average

 

Time Required: 1 hour

 

Here's How:

1. Choose your toy. Butt Plugs (also known as anal plugs or anal toys) are a good way to start anal play. These are usually short toys that bulge in the middle, but have a narrow neck at the base. Once the widest part is inside of you, your sphincter muscle contracts around the narrow neck, lodging the toy in place. The toy must have a flared base, which prevents it from slipping up inside you.

 

2. Bring on the lubricant. Ample use of lubrication is key to a good anal sex experience, since the anus does not self-lubricant. So have a pump-style dispenser on hand, and choose a thicker water-based lubricant like Slippery Stuff Gel.

 

3. Get ready. Make sure your fingernails are trimmed and clean. If you’re concerned about hygeine, have a bowel movement first. Bathing is also a good idea.

 

4. Turn yourself on. Listen to sexy music, read or watch erotica, play with yourself in the mirror—do what you usually do to get yourself excited.

 

5. Find a comfortable position. Try different positions till you get one that gives you good access to your butt. Lying on your side, stomach, or squatting are all good. You can also do this in the shower, so you’ll be warm and clean.

 

6. Get the lay of the land. If you’ve never seen your anus, get out the mirror and have a look. Apply some lubricant to your fingertips and explore the skin all around the anus. Then gently tap on the anus, watching how it reacts as you do, noting any special sensitivity as well. Breathe deeply, focusing your mind on relaxing your butt muscles (unclench them if you’ve tightened up). You'll find that this muscle control will help you relax so anal penetration will not be painful.

 

7. Insert a finger. As you exhale, gently insert a lubed-up fingertip in past the anal sphincter, which has a tendency to contract when it meets resistance. If you have difficulty, massage the anus, and try pushing out (as if you were going to the bathroom), as you push your finger in. Once inside, hold still while you get used to the sensation. When you’re ready, move your finger around as much as you feel comfortable—many people enjoy a gentle circling motion—do this as long as it’s pleasurable.

 

8. Slip in the anal plug. Withdraw your finger, add lubricant to your butt plug, and then try to insert the toy. If your toy is long or a bit soft, it might help to hold the toy near the top and guide it in. If you have trouble, stop for a bit, massage your anus, relax your muscles and try again. Once inside, hold still with just a bit of the toy inside you, rather than pushing it in to the hilt, as your rectum will need a minute to get used to the object coming up (rather than going out).

 

9. Lodge the butt plug in place. Once inside, slowly push the toy further in if it feels good. Keep adding lubricant, because slipperier is better. Your butt plug should get smaller at the base, and when it’s inserted as far as it will go, it’ll stay lodged in your rectum.

 

10. Get busy. At this point, you can leave the toy in place and go on to stimulate other pleasure points, or you can explore subtle variations in movement—try turning the plug slowly, gently pushing or tapping on it, or turning on/up the vibration if you’ve got a vibrating plug. If you’ve chosen a butt plug with a gentle curve, make sure that when it’s inside your anus the curve points toward your stomach. This will put pleasurable pressure on the prostate and may indirectly stimulate the G Spot.

 

11. Have fun. Because the plug is designed to be “worn,” you are free to get up and go about whatever business you like. I suggest spending some time exploring different possibilities—walking around the house, taking a stroll outside, riding a motorcycle, having cybersex—anything that’ll keep you tuned into the sensations in your butt. Chances are, the longer you go at it, the more turned on you’ll get.

 

12. Bottom’s up! You can just enjoy your anal plug and then remove it when it loses its thrill, or you can take your play to the next level, and try to orgasm with the plug in place. Get in a position that is both comfortable and gives you access to your clit or penis. Use your favorite masturbation technique. You may want to remove the plug quickly after you come, but remember to do so gently.

 

Tips:

If you find you like movement in and out of your anus, try a slim dildo rather than a plug. To get a better grip, use a dildo with a long handle on one end or one of the bent double dildos.

If you get a plug or dildo with a suction cup on the base, you can attach it to a wall, back yourself up against it, and penetrate yourself without having to use your hands.

Anal beads are another great toy for exploring anal play, as the sphincter muscles contract around each bead as they are inserted, which many find pleasurable.

If you don’t want to worry about toy cleanliness, invest in a silicone plug or dildo. These are non-porous so you can wash them off easily with soap and water. Porous toys (those made out of rubber and cyberskin) can also be used with condoms.

What You Need:

butt plug or small dildo

lubricant

towel for clean up

vibrator (optional)

[Chuck50]

I started with 6" and then went to 8" nice size to start and nicer to move up to. I think a standard cock is nice and then once you get into it move on to the exotic. I have not moved on yet. But we have to begin somewhere. HUGS Chuck :9 :9 :9 :9

[+ glutes]

Maybe your friend should consult with Bill O'Reilly. He seems to do more than Dirty Talking Points.

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Unleaded And Regular

 

Do what I did once for a client. Find a local business in your area (or whereever you wil be doing your purchasing, including on line), who will accept a return for a sex toy which is UNOPENED and still in its original, unopened packaging. Many businesses try to pull the, once purchased it cannot be returned even if unopened, but this is store policy, not usual state law, IF the item is in a container that cannot be easily opened (i.e., a non shrink-wrapped cardboard box, for example).

 

Buy four and let him pick two. Chuck is probably on the right track with the 6" and 8" comment, for standard and larger, but you never know.

 

http://www.gaydar.co.uk/francodisantis

[Will]

Many thanks to all of you for these helpful suggestions. I think now I'm on the right track.

 

Special thanks to Lucky for those specific instructions. I'm going to download them and send them on to my friend with his Starter Kit of a (1) butt plug, (2) a 6" dildo, and (3) an 8" dildo. If he doesn't send himself into the stratosphere with all of that, I don't know my boy!

[+ Lucky]

You're welcome, Will. I can just imagine that everyone in Hooville got the ol' mirror out and took a good gander at their anus! I hope they like what they saw enough to continue with the next step.

That includes you too, taylor!