Discrimination

[rapaz7]

Has anyone here experienced behavior from others that was outright discrimination because of sexual orientation? I have been going to a new barbershop for the last several months that is run by three very attractive straight guys. This past Saturday I thought that they were going to make me leave without giving me a haircut. The one particular barber that I go to everytime does not seem like he has much of a problem with someone being gay but I think that the other two are pressuring him to get rid of me. BTW I am very straight looking and am never detected as gay anywhere. The reason I am having this problem is because a friend of mine told me about this barbershop and went there with me the first time but not inside the store. He later told me that he would not go back in there because he had problems with these guys. They told him he had to wait and then never served him. I do not know what my friend did to cause this but he may have been staring at them or did something that was not discrete. Now I am stuck. I do not know what to do. I am very happy with the particular guy who cuts my hair and I really do not want to stop going there. Until this past Saturday I was considering the one who cut my hair as something like a friend because he always talked to me the whole time was friendly. This past Saturday he told me he did not know if he would be able to cut my hair that day and there was noone else waiting for him. I didn't say anything I just looked at him and then he called me over to the chair and cut my hair. Any suggestions on how to handle this one? And please, to the guys on here who know me personally do not mention which part of the country I am in because I do not want to identify anyone.

[BARR1965]

Maybe could u ask him if he does home service. And pay him a little extra for his commute to your place. IMO, another advantage for him will be that he gets to keep the payment 100% instead of sharing it with the owner of the barbershop. Is he the owner or just an employee?

[+ Lucky]

Is there a shortage of barbers in your area? If not, why not go where your business is more appreciated?

[+ deej]

Let your wallet express your opinion.

 

Spend your money elsewhere.

[rapaz7]

I appreciate the input from you guys. In my first post I said that I really did not want to stop going there. I like the guy that I am going to and I am not getting any vibe of homophobia from him. It is the other two that are there that are real jerks. I think that they are all in business together, one is not an employee of the other. Deej, you have a point when you say that I should go where my money is appreciated but on the other hand I feel like people should not be able to get away with treating other people like that. It is the same as the debate with the Boy Scouts and the Military. I remember people writing into the newspaper asking why a gay person would fight to remain in the Boyscouts. He wanted to know why someone would want to go where he is not wanted. Anyway these are things that need to be debated. I have not decided yet what I will do in my situation but perhaps the next time I go there ( if I do) will reveal something to me.

[trilingual]

Is there a local anti-gay discrimination law in your town/county/state? If so, these guys are breaking the law. You might want to talk it over with a local gay rights advocacy organization. If there is a law, some "testing" of the shop could be done to determine if other gays are being denied service. If it really is happening, a complaint against them may make these fellows wake up and smell the coffee: discrimination doesn't pay in 2004.

 

Rosa Parks and MLKJr. got fed up with this kind of crap back in the 50s. When are we going to stand up and say "no"?

[+ deej]

Let me preface this by saying I'm the wrong person to ask for haircut advice. 20 years ago, I got tired of paying good money for bad haircuts so I just *stopped* having haircuts. ;-)

 

As tri says, there may actually be legal ways to fight this if you're willing, and if you're willing it would probably be hugely satisfying. But it may also be way more time consuming and expensive than you want. You might get just as much satisfaction putting up posters around the neighborhood saying to avoid the place.

 

There's more than a haircut on the line here, I know. Only you really know how far to take it.

[mansniffing]

Let it go and get on with your life. There are plenty of barbers as there are fish in the ocean. No point in subjecting yourself to this environment. My barber is gay and I'm delighted with him not only because he's excellent but we can talk about what we have in common; men. Let's face it, birds of a feather flock together and it sure is more pleasant.

[Guest]

Boy, cutting hair sure strikes me as a wierd profession for a homophobe to go into. Assuming you're right that these guys are homophobes and that you're not just being paranoid, you should just find someone else and move on. Unless you're living in a small village in Utah (or Iran), I can't imagine that your barber's talents are so unique that it's worth being subjected to humiliation. Nor is it worth engaging a legal battle over, unless you've got much too much time on your hands.

[+ Charlie]

Unless he gives a fabulous haircut that you can't get anywhere else, I don't know why you continue to patronize the place. If they want to penalize themselves by alienating a customer (and other potential customers who might be brought there as you were), that's their loss.

 

By the way, it doesn't sound as though they are overtly discriminating against gays--there are no signs saying "We Don't Cut Fag Hair!" or direct comments to you about not wanting to serve you because you are gay--so publicly charging them with sexual discrimination would be very difficult, and could even cause unpleasant backlash for you if you can't prove it. I think the best you can do is word of mouth among your friends.

[bigjake8]

I would go in the middle of the night and write "FAGS NOT WELCOME HERE" across the front of the store with red spraypaint. That should clear things up for them.

 

 

 

 

 

>Has anyone here experienced behavior from others that was

>outright discrimination because of sexual orientation? I have

>been going to a new barbershop for the last several months

>that is run by three very attractive straight guys. This past

>Saturday I thought that they were going to make me leave

>without giving me a haircut. The one particular barber that I

>go to everytime does not seem like he has much of a problem

>with someone being gay but I think that the other two are

>pressuring him to get rid of me. BTW I am very straight

>looking and am never detected as gay anywhere. The reason I

>am having this problem is because a friend of mine told me

>about this barbershop and went there with me the first time

>but not inside the store. He later told me that he would not

>go back in there because he had problems with these guys.

>They told him he had to wait and then never served him. I do

>not know what my friend did to cause this but he may have been

>staring at them or did something that was not discrete. Now I

>am stuck. I do not know what to do. I am very happy with the

>particular guy who cuts my hair and I really do not want to

>stop going there. Until this past Saturday I was considering

>the one who cut my hair as something like a friend because he

>always talked to me the whole time was friendly. This past

>Saturday he told me he did not know if he would be able to cut

>my hair that day and there was noone else waiting for him. I

>didn't say anything I just looked at him and then he called me

>over to the chair and cut my hair. Any suggestions on how to

>handle this one? And please, to the guys on here who know me

>personally do not mention which part of the country I am in

>because I do not want to identify anyone.