Asking escort for HIV Oraquick test

[Erid]

I know this question may sound a little strange. I really want to hire and have some good time but hiv really concerns me even with protection.

 

Has anyone actually asked their potential hire for hiv oraquick test at the start of the appointment? What was the escort reaction to this request?

 

Of course, this has to be mutually agreed upon and discussed before the appointment time. I also don't mind taking the test myself in front of the escort for mutual protection. I also have no problem paying for the test kit as well as paying the escort for the first hour for his time no matter what the result comes back as poz or neg.

 

I understand that safe sex practice is important even if the Oraquick test comes back as negative. But I am just curious what everyone else think. Please no bashing even if you disagree. Thanks in advance.

[tsgarp]

I can only imagine this is going to spark endless conversation on this message board...

[BaronArtz]

I think it is a bit abrupt. A request like that is not likely to set the right 'vibe' for the rest of the appointment. How would you feel if he asked YOU for an Oraquick test? It's better to assume he is HIV+ and take all necessary precautions.

[joselowe]

I think it's a smart idea, your life is more important than saving escort time

[Bryanforservice]

Communication is key.... letting your escort know ahead of time that you will be asking him to submit to that test is a courtesy that should be respected and if both parties agree, then all should be fine. I would not expect to have that sort of test sprung on an escort only after he walks through your door.

 

As Killian noted above, there are limits to what even an Oraquick test can detect so thinking about your sexual health in terms of shades of gray and "safer sex" rather than absolutes and "safe sex" is an important reminder. Assuming everyone is HIV+, have the knowledge to understand the risks you may be taking, and taking the precautions to ensure the outcome you desire is right thing to do regardless of hiring.

[Guest boiworship08]

I think the whole idea is absurd. If you want total safety, jack off.

[mmk123]

http://www.fda.gov/BiologicsBloodVaccines/BloodBloodProducts/ApprovedProducts/PremarketApprovalsPMAs/ucm311895.htm

 

http://www.aidsmap.com/Large-US-study-shows-which-HIV-tests-are-most-accurate/page/2812847/

 

some interesting reading here

I say if you want to test your escort take the test as well with him

Also, let's look at this realistically. If any gay man (or straight man) out there who is sexually active thinks that they have not had sex with someone who is HIV Positive then they are a fool. We all have in the past and we will in the future. It is inevitable. All you need to do is take precautions and practice safe sex. And if you are still unsure then I would say that Avatar11 gave some good advice.

[Guest ChrisW]

Where to start on this one...

 

SO the majority of men that are hiv positive are on antiretroviral therapy which means they are undetectable. If they are undetectable that means they have such a minuscule amount of HIV in their blood that it can't be detected. For you that means they won't transmit HIV in there semen.

 

http://www.aidsmap.com/No-one-with-an-undetectable-viral-load-gay-or-heterosexual-transmits-HIV-in-first-two-years-of-PARTNER-study/page/2832748/

 

All of the people that seroconverted in that study had there strain of HIV genotyped and it didn't match up with there partners, so they didn't contract it from there partner but rather got it from outside their relationship.

 

As for the oral test the window for accuracy is only 3 months out and quite frankly if your hiring an escort they have probably slept with someone in the last 3 months.

 

Your fears about HIV are understandable there is a tremendous cultural trauma that we have endured, especially gay men. That being said the science is out there now that shows that HIV is not that big a deal anymore if your on meds. If you feel that playing with an escort thats poz is not something your comfortable with thats certainly your prerogative but your missing out on some really hot guys and some great sex.

 

I am in a serodiscortant relationship (one neg and one poz) and I wouldn't trade my partner for anyone in the world. He is a wonderful human being, great partner, and the hottest fuck I have ever had. He is on meds and I don't worry about HIV with him. If your not willing to have sex with a poz guy your limiting your sexual options as well as your romantic ones. There are a lot of great guys out there don't shoot yourself in the foot over an irrational fear.

[+ Gar1eth]

Just to make sure it's spelled out what everyone has said about the three month window for Oraquick testing-yes someone who tests negative on Oraquick can be HIV positive and infectious. The test checks for antibodies which can take awhile to develop.

 

Gman

[Tonyko]

Am I CRAZY but don't we just assume and treat EVERYONE (including ourselves) as if they HAVE it??? From a new or hired sex partner to a bleeding stranger on the street?? And act accordingly to always stay safe?? That's what I and my buds (those who are still here) have always done and I believe thats WHY we're still here :-) I guess I just don't understand what a Poz OR Neg determination would or should alter behavior-wise.

[OrdinaryJoe]

What would you do if he showed a positive result?

 

There have been some excellent comments made here, particularly about what a negative result actually means - that they were negative up to as much 3 months ago but not necessarily more recently. I don't think an HIV test should provide you any solid sense of security. Safer sex practises and enjoying the hell out of them is much more secure.

 

I can't help but think that HIV testing is a very, very personal thing. It's not something I would ever want to do with someone else.

[rvwnsd]

The others who replied to this post have made some excellent points regarding HIV. I'd like to add that a guy whose Oraquick test comes back negative could have another STI and transmit it to you. We tend to think first of HIV, but we need to keep in mind there are other STIs to think about.

 

To answer your question, I have not and would not ask an escort to take an Oraquick test. Instead, I've educated myself about HIV, know my risk tolerance, and have adopted practices to minimize my risk of contracting HIV.

[Tonyko]

Thank you Tonyko, couldn't have said it better. (or maybe we're both crazy)

 

I really don't mean to dictate to anyone how they should lead their lives, but I sometimes fear that with this shift now that we have a lifetime managibility with this virus that were getting too relaxed. And things can change, strains can morph, what we "think" we know now may be obsolete in the future. I JUST don't want ANY boys to go through what I did. I lost almost all of my dearest friends in those plague years, and I don't mean Bar Buds I mean my core group the guys I was sitting around the same table with with each other's mothers feeding us at 15 and 25 and 35 including who was esentially my brother and that whole part of my history is gone because there's no one to turn to and say hey remember when we... and it sux and I miss them like crazy TO this day and I hate being around and get jealous of guys who are out with buds they've known that long because I don't have that. I always figured we'd grow old together but they're frozen at 35 or 37 etc and I STILL wake up sometimes and in those few seconds of half-sleep forget they're gone. But they at least had an excuse, no one KNEW back then. I watched the obit list at Actor's Equity go from a typed piece of paper on the board to a hand-written scroll hitting the floor. I visited my buds in St Lukes St Vincents with all these unconnected dots blood cancer brain cancer lymphoma (I had to look it up) pneumonia meningitis TB (I laughed with him at that because it sounded like some old thing from a Tennessee Williams play) and when The Village Voice article appeared about the NEW GAY CANCER (the KS) that was yet again something else. Eventually the dots got connected and one by one they left. So I guess I fear that we can yet again be living in a time of unconnected dots that the next gen will awaken to AND I JUST DON'T WANT ANY BEAUTIFUL YOUNG MEN TO GO THROUGH WHAT I DID. (end of sermon :-)

[SteveEscort]

I know this question may sound a little strange. I really want to hire and have some good time but hiv really concerns me even with protection.

 

Has anyone actually asked their potential hire for hiv oraquick test at the start of the appointment? What was the escort reaction to this request?

 

Of course, this has to be mutually agreed upon and discussed before the appointment time. I also don't mind taking the test myself in front of the escort for mutual protection. I also have no problem paying for the test kit as well as paying the escort for the first hour for his time no matter what the result comes back as poz or neg.

 

I understand that safe sex practice is important even if the Oraquick test comes back as negative. But I am just curious what everyone else think. Please no bashing even if you disagree. Thanks in advance.

 

You're less likely to catch any type of sexually transmitted disease from a sex worker than you are from a member of the public, despite our heightened sexual encounters.

 

I assume you're wanting to bareback, because why else would you require the test.

 

I get tested every month, I've never had anyone request a test in their presence and to be honest if anyone asked for that I would refuse the appointment. My sexual health is not to be questioned because I never think to question yours. You should assume that I am positive and I should assume you're positive before any sexual encounter happens, therefore we both play safe to ensure neither gets infected.

 

Hiv is a very hard disease to catch. You're more likely to get ghonnorea or syphillis or even pubic lice. They're much easier to catch. Are you willing to test for those too because you're in for a long night.

 

If you're that keen on the test then I would recommend you have your encounter with someone who is not reliant on sex to make a living and someone who is willing to wait in chastity for three months and then test with you for a mutually beneficial time. Other than that, you're just being quite silly. The test isn't going to tell you if he caught it 4 days ago and neither is your test.

[jimboivyo]

if you're that concerned with hiv you probably shouldn't be hiring escorts or having sex in the first place

 

I reckon you already got your answer from the many replies here

[bigvalboy]

I really don't mean to dictate to anyone how they should lead their lives, but I sometimes fear that with this shift now that we have a lifetime managibility with this virus that were getting too relaxed. And things can change, strains can morph, what we "think" we know now may be obsolete in the future. I JUST don't want ANY boys to go through what I did. I lost almost all of my dearest friends in those plague years, and I don't mean Bar Buds I mean my core group the guys I was sitting around the same table with with each other's mothers feeding us at 15 and 25 and 35 including who was esentially my brother and that whole part of my history is gone because there's no one to turn to and say hey remember when we... and it sux and I miss them like crazy TO this day and I hate being around and get jealous of guys who are out with buds they've known that long because I don't have that. I always figured we'd grow old together but they're frozen at 35 or 37 etc and I STILL wake up sometimes and in those few seconds of half-sleep forget they're gone. But they at least had an excuse, no one KNEW back then. I watched the obit list at Actor's Equity go from a typed piece of paper on the board to a hand-written scroll hitting the floor. I visited my buds in St Lukes St Vincents with all these unconnected dots blood cancer brain cancer lymphoma (I had to look it up) pneumonia meningitis TB (I laughed with him at that because it sounded like some old thing from a Tennessee Williams play) and when The Village Voice article appeared about the NEW GAY CANCER (the KS) that was yet again something else. Eventually the dots got connected and one by one they left. So I guess I fear that we can yet again be living in a time of unconnected dots that the next gen will awaken to AND I JUST DON'T WANT ANY BEAUTIFUL YOUNG MEN TO GO THROUGH WHAT I DID. (end of sermon :-)

 

Excellent post....Hearfelt Tonyko. It brought back some long lost memories. For those of us who went through those dark days, I still think of my friends as if they are somehow still here.

[+ dutchmuch]

Tes or no test, you need to practice safe / safer sex!

[Steven_Draker]

I know this question may sound a little strange. I really want to hire and have some good time but hiv really concerns me even with protection.

 

Has anyone actually asked their potential hire for hiv oraquick test at the start of the appointment? What was the escort reaction to this request?

 

Of course, this has to be mutually agreed upon and discussed before the appointment time. I also don't mind taking the test myself in front of the escort for mutual protection. I also have no problem paying for the test kit as well as paying the escort for the first hour for his time no matter what the result comes back as poz or neg.

 

I understand that safe sex practice is important even if the Oraquick test comes back as negative. But I am just curious what everyone else think. Please no bashing even if you disagree. Thanks in advance.

 

 

There's nothing wrong with asking in the initial conversation. If he refuses, find one that will accept.

 

If you want extra security avoid escorts who bareback, engage in "partying", have an ad on BarebackRealTime or advertise "Anything Goes" on Adam4Adam.

 

You can certainly have a good time and stay safe!

 

[Lewis H]

I dont see a problem asking. Keep in mind that if that's what you want to do, you should be prepared to pay $50 for the kit plus 20 minutes of time for the test to be done, plus the hour or however long you booked him for.

 

Also, keep in mind those tests don't reflect what someone did yesterday. Only what someone did with time enough for HIV Antibodies to be produced, and thats very subjective. The guidelines are a window of three months.

 

I personally think it's so socially invasive a request even if the person IS an escort, but certainly your prerogative (and the escort's) to decide if it's worth it for either of you. I would just assume everyone is infectious and act accordingly.

 

That said, if the escort recently got infected but not long ago enough (the purported 3 months) to develop the antibodies that would show up in the test, it's been said that that's allegedly a time when someone is MOST infectious. Can anyone else confirm this factoid?

[Steven_Draker]

SO the majority of men that are hiv positive are on antiretroviral therapy which means they are undetectable.

 

There's a large percentage of HIV positive men and women who are NOT on HAART, not counting those who don't know they're infected.

[+ sniper]

Where to start on this one...

 

SO the majority of men that are hiv positive are on antiretroviral therapy which means they are undetectable. If they are undetectable that means they have such a minuscule amount of HIV in their blood that it can't be detected. For you that means they won't transmit HIV in there semen.

 

http://www.aidsmap.com/No-one-with-an-undetectable-viral-load-gay-or-heterosexual-transmits-HIV-in-first-two-years-of-PARTNER-study/page/2832748/

 

All of the people that seroconverted in that study had there strain of HIV genotyped and it didn't match up with there partners, so they didn't contract it from there partner but rather got it from outside their relationship.

 

As for the oral test the window for accuracy is only 3 months out and quite frankly if your hiring an escort they have probably slept with someone in the last 3 months.

 

Your fears about HIV are understandable there is a tremendous cultural trauma that we have endured, especially gay men. That being said the science is out there now that shows that HIV is not that big a deal anymore if your on meds. If you feel that playing with an escort thats poz is not something your comfortable with thats certainly your prerogative but your missing out on some really hot guys and some great sex.

 

I am in a serodiscortant relationship (one neg and one poz) and I wouldn't trade my partner for anyone in the world. He is a wonderful human being, great partner, and the hottest fuck I have ever had. He is on meds and I don't worry about HIV with him. If your not willing to have sex with a poz guy your limiting your sexual options as well as your romantic ones. There are a lot of great guys out there don't shoot yourself in the foot over an irrational fear.

 

A) on therapy does NOT necessarily mean undetectable, though it's true that most people who get therapy are.

b)it's not true that most people with HIV are on therapy. Only about half of people with HIV are getting any sort of treatment for it and only about one in four people wit HIV overall is undetectable.

[Rudynate]

It seems unnecessary if you're using condoms and you don't let your partner come inside of you. There are no guarantees, of course, but using condoms is a pretty reliable way to avoid HIV. I almost never ask a potential partner what his status is because it is almost irrelevant. I assume that he is positive and that condoms are the order of the day. It's worked for over 30 years.

[Guest ChrisW]

There's a large percentage of HIV positive men and women who are NOT on HAART, not counting those who don't know they're infected. [/color]

 

Thank you for that morsel of insight Mr Draker. I made an oversight by not stating that people that know there status but leave it to you to catch people ;-)

[Nvr2Thick]

I know this question may sound a little strange. I really want to hire and have some good time but hiv really concerns me even with protection.

 

Has anyone actually asked their potential hire for hiv oraquick test at the start of the appointment? What was the escort reaction to this request?

 

Of course, this has to be mutually agreed upon and discussed before the appointment time. I also don't mind taking the test myself in front of the escort for mutual protection. I also have no problem paying for the test kit as well as paying the escort for the first hour for his time no matter what the result comes back as poz or neg.

 

I understand that safe sex practice is important even if the Oraquick test comes back as negative. But I am just curious what everyone else think. Please no bashing even if you disagree. Thanks in advance.

 

To clarify, would the agreement be that you would not have sex with the escort if his test results were positive, or would it alter decisions about which sexual acts to take on or what protective measures you'd take?

[Steven_Draker]

A) on therapy does NOT necessarily mean undetectable, though it's true that most people who get therapy are.

b)it's not true that most people with HIV are on therapy. Only about half of people with HIV are getting any sort of treatment for it and only about one in four people wit HIV overall is undetectable.

 

Thank you for clarifying, sniper!

 

If anyone care to search I have posted an article in the Forum with the percentage of people on therapy vs total number of HIV positive tested.

 

Also, it takes several months for someone on therapy to become "undetectable", it isn't an overnight change.

 

Finally, even if someone is undetectable, the ELISA test will show up as "positive".