"Ask me" rates . . .

[corndog]

For me, the bottom line is this: If I'm sufficiently interested in a guy with an "ask me" rate, I'll ask. If I'm moderately interested or it's a tie between a guy with a posted rate and a guy with an "ask me" rate, the guy with the posted rate gets my call.

+1

I think that's exactly it.

[Steven_Draker]

Going back to the original question: My rates are always posted online, both on my personal website and in all my ads and I still get asked about rates ... all the time. Some guys approach me about rates, then they ask about student/senior (you name it) ... discount.

 

If a client is looking for a Ford Fusion, why make him waste his time shopping in a Ferrari dealership.

 

Funny analogy, but let's not forget that escorts are not cars, they're human beings and the difference in an hour of their time it's not as important as the difference in price between a Ford and a Ferrari. The problem lies in the fact that many out there want to buy a Ferrari for the price of a Ford Fusion.

 

Don't treat an escort like a "thing" if you don't want to receive the same treatment in return.

[+ FreshFluff]

Escorts aren't products, but they offer a service whose price reflects their appearance, grooming, sexual abilities, social skills, and personality. It might be more appropriate to compare them to hairdressers, attorneys, or consultants.

 

Attorneys and consultants usually have fixed rates that are shared when you contact them, while hairdressers typically publicize their rates.

[BaronArtz]

[quote=FreshFluff;947798

 

Attorneys and consultants usually have fixed rates that are shared when you contact them

 

'Ask Me' escorts will share their rates when you contact them. And sorry FF, I like you, but it is not true that attorneys and consultants have fixed rates. They have different rates for different services Are you filing for a divorce or do you want a rental contract reviewed? Different rates.

 

Ditto for high end barbers and hair salons. In fact, it is not uncommon for the very high end ones, when you call them, to quote rates 'starting at $xxx.xx'.

 

Here is just one casual example: the John Barrett salon at Bergdorf Goodman. Note that the prices are mostly listed 'from $xxx.xx' or 'by consultation'. In fact, 'by consultation' sounds more elegant than 'ask me', does it not? But you still have to pick up the phone and ASK!

 

http://www.johnbarrett.com/services.html

[desertguy1954]

I agree with Steven. An escort is not a car. He is an individual just like me. I expect that when I engage an individual for however much time, I expect to be treated a certain way. Which also means that I am gong to treat him the same as I want. I want our time together to be fun for both of us.

[+ FreshFluff]

'Ask Me' escorts will share their rates when you contact them. And sorry FF, I like you, but it is not true that attorneys and consultants have fixed rates. They have different rates for different services Are you filing for a divorce or do you want a rental contract reviewed? Different rates.

 

Ditto for high end barbers and hair salons. In fact, it is not uncommon for the very high end ones, when you call them, to quote rates 'starting at $xxx.xx'.

 

Clarification: I meant that the hourly rate is fixed but top lawyers still require clients to inquire to get the rate. You won't find the hourly rate for Cravath partners on their site. I agree, then; it's an "ask me" situation.

 

IME, high end hair salons like John Barrett usually charge the "starting at" rate. My style is a really difficult one, and I still get charged the "starting from" price on a blowout". The idea, I think, is to make clients grateful for being charged the low number.

[+ DickyF]

I still don't understand why an escort has "ask me" for an hourly rate. I'm guessing there are a few reasons:

1. The rate is higher than normal and the escort doesn't want to scare off clients without talking to them.

2. It is to negotiate! I'm sure some clients and escorts prefer that.

3. The escort wants to get a feel of the client before giving a customized price. Or maybe offer extras or something that can't be conveyed in the ad.

 

I do not like to negotiate. I'm very bad at it. Some are great at it and my hat off to them.

Therefore I tend to stay away from Ask Me.

 

I should add that a number of escorts on this forum complain about clients wanting to negotiate the rates. "Ask me" will invite that IMHO. There are also complaints about time-wasters with lots of questions. "Ask me" literally invites questions.

[Tonyko]

SO glad I saw this BEFORE I started an exact thread because this is something that has bothered me as well when it comes to hiring: I TOTALLY get that a scort is providing a "service" like anyone else in any service industry. Not sure about the car analogy but I know when my cleaning girl went from just cleaning to doing all my laundry as well, it added more work for her and the price went UP. I TOTS get that. I GET that a scort needs to keep open the option of varying a rate based on what he will have to do.

BUT I, like many, am one of those who is VERY embarrassed if I have to handel (yiddish for negotiate a price :-) I HATE HATE doing that. A scorts price is his price he has a right to it. I understand that most rates wind up being within the norm parameters, but I oft FEAR that it won't be. IF an email option is avail AND he's willing to discuss it via that, great, I can bow out if it's too high. But for those who respond they will only discuss live via a call or text, I will often pass up.

I'M NOT SAYING THE SCORT IS WRONG TO DO THIS HE HAS A RIGHT TO CONDUCT HIS BIZ ANY WAY HE CHOOSES. HE HAS A RIGHT TO PROTECT HIM SELF FROM ENTRAPMENT ETC, HE HAS A RIGHT TO CHARGE BASED ON HOW MUCH WORK A CLIENT WILL BE.

I'm just saying how I, me personally, react to it. (this forun is for open thought and discussion right?)

INCALL: $$$ OUTCALL - ASK ME - fine, I see a base number that helps me gauge.

INCALL: $$$ AND UP = OUTCALL $$$ AND UP - also fine, I can gauge.

ASK ME - ASK ME - I pass them by.

(AGAIN, THIS IS JUST "ME" AND HOW I REACT)

Guess I would like to know why listing a "base and up" kick off price is such a bad thang from the Scort's pov??

[MiamiLooker]

Deal with what's in front of you rather than what you wish it would be. You're going to continue to see "ask me" in some ads. Opinions discussed in this thread aren't going to change that. So, either ask or don't ask.

[+ WhamIAm]

OP here --

 

Thanks as always to all for an interesting and educational discussion (but for the occasional personal attack on others).

 

Good points pro and con, but decided to take the plunge. Called a guy for an upcoming trip whose ad I'd looked at previously (a lot) but had passed by due to the "Ask Me" question. Gorgeous and his ad text gave me a good vibe. Got a good feeling from our phone call and he quoted a rate that was pretty much on point with the rest of the market in that city. So, I booked.

 

As it turns out, booking with him violates one of my other basic rules -- not to hire unreviewed guys. However, he's another of my occasional exceptions -- I've seen his ad (in various cities) for months and, again, got a good feeling. So, we shall see whether in fact rules are made to be broken.

 

Cheers.

[down_to_business]

So, here's the thing with negotiating. Many people want to offer less money and expect the same amount of quality and service. My response is usually, "I'm always up for making a deal. I'll happily accept $XXX but you have to not expect XYZ. If not, there are many other escorts who are advertising the services you want with the price you are willing to pay." One must remember, negotiating is a two way street.

 

And that brings us back full circle to the issue. The escort is NOT advertising the price so we have no idea who is offering the services we want at the price we are willing to pay and to find out brings us to this uncomfortable conversation that either gives the client or the escort or both some degree of unpleasantness (i.e. you 'the escort' thinking we are trying to get the same quality of service for a lower price). I understand that it may allow you convert more calls into sales (like telemarketing), but there are negatives to using this method-- they might just not be as obvious to you.

 

For the escorts out there that provide your rates and practice truth in advertising etc... I thank you. And to clear one other thing up, I don't think you are cars (like the analogy used) .. some of you just cost more than a Ferrari

[MiamiLooker]

For the escorts out there that provide your rates and practice truth in advertising etc... I thank you.

 

You mean, like the ones that say they're charging for time only LOL?

[BaronArtz]

And to clear one other thing up, I don't think you are cars (like the analogy used) .. some of you just cost more than a Ferrari

 

Well I find that very interesting. It shows that (1) you may not know what a Ferrari truly costs or (2) you have been grotesquely over-paying, in spite of sticking to escorts with 'listed' prices only.

[RadioRob]

BA... maybe they know where to get a better deal on a Ferrari than you and I do?

 

Lets not be hasty and judge here... maybe we'll learn something and pick up a new car for less than what we expect!

[+ deej]

Must you always be so condescending? I can think of many things that are not obvious to you

 

Girls! Don't make me wake Daddy up. You won't like what happens.

 

Behave.

[RadioRob]

Deej, I've been a bad boy... can I pick who gets to take me to the back room for punishment?

 

Back on topic... I personally fall in line with the comment expressed earlier about not being 100% turned off by it. If the person is very much someone I have interest in, I'll go the route and ask. (I don't negotiate pricing though. Once I'm given a number, I accept. Otherwise I politely decline and thank them for their time.) Now if there are two or more gentlemen that I am considering... the one who has rates already posted that I consider reasonable start off with "bonus points" so to speak and they're the first that I reach out to.

 

I'm not going to tell someone how to run their life or their business just like I don't want someone else doing the same to me. If having "Ask me" works for THEIR particular business model, the more power to them. Obviously if it's not working, they'll decide to make changes/try something different.

[Guest boiworship08]

Never had a problem negotiating and never got less than what I hoped for afterwards. I prefer "session" rates which preclude clock-watching. 90% of the time the experiences have been excellent and led to re-meets.

[kevininsa]

For starters:

 

2) It's a colossal waste of time for a prospective client.

 

3) It's an invitation to negotiate and many clients have expressed a preference not to negotiate.

 

5) Nothing like some of the response I have gotten to the "ask me" which include general stuff like "you can't afford it if you have to ask"

 

6) It is a way to shame you and make you pay more than someone else is paying.

 

That's what the big deal is. It's a colossal waste of precious time, adversarial, inefficient, deceitful, confrontational, uncomfortable and dangerous.

 

I couldn't agree more. I don't like to negotiate. I don't like to contact and find out it's usually outside my limit. (and I'm willing to pay market) It makes me uncomfortable and that's not a good way to start. Personally I think they lose potential income, but if that's the way they want to run their business, fine. I'm not calling.

[+ Gar1eth]

I have never liked the 'Ask Me'. Back when I was hiring, if I were interested in a guy, I wanted to know whether he was within my budget. If he wasn't, I didn't want to waste either of our times. Another thing- while not foolproof- it seems that over the years, I've seen a greater percentage of ads that are fake/sketchy/scammers with the 'Ask Me'. I'm not saying I would never have hired an 'Ask Me' guy. But I would have been generally disinclined to unless possibly they had stellar reviews like Killian James.

 

Gman

[tom1980]

I used to avoid "Ask Me" escorts, but then I decided to do an experiment. Every time I found an escort I was interested in hiring with with an ask me price tag, I asked, "Is your hourly rate $____?" and filled in the blank with the market rate for the area (or whatever I was willing to pay if I was in a place where there wasn't a determinable market rate). 95% of the time, the answer was yes or "how'd you know?" Often that was followed by a question about my psychic abilities, which led to playful banter/flirting, which led to a great appointment.

[MiamiLooker]

To those of you that say you don’t negotiate, if you contacted an escort with an advertised rate of $200 wanting to see him sometime that day, and he says if you can see him within the next hour he’ll only charge you $150, you would respond with “No, I only pay the advertised rate?”

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

To those of you that say you don’t negotiate, if you contacted an escort with an advertised rate of $200 wanting to see him sometime that day, and he says if you can see him within the next hour he’ll only charge you $150, you would respond with “No, I only pay the advertised rate?”[/font]

 

I'm confused at how multiple-hour appointments are handled—or if the clients who "don't like to negotiate/regard asking as a waste of time" simply pay #hours x hourly rate.

[adriano46]

Some here have absolutely no issue or qualm with an escort whose ad has "ask me" for rates. Others use the rates as a way of culling the choice of selections (and I agree completely with TGuy and his assessment of what the rates help to cull: the underpriced vs the highly over-priced "lie back and get serviced" Brodie Sinclair types).

 

I use the "rates" as a gauge. I generally prefer staying "under" $300 (which in NY and some other major centers will definitely thin out the number of people I am willing to see). I have paid $300 with someone I know and trust and whose personality is one that I consider "worth" the $300/hr fee. That said, I find my best encounters almost always are with those in the $200-$275 range (and as I come to know some, they will give me a rate based on the total amount of hours we are together as well as the types of activities - dinner, movie, show, concert, etc... - involved).

 

I learned from a guy I deeply respect that a phone call often goes a LONG way in settling many questions (just the sound of the voice, the maturity sensed in the ability to converse) helps concretize the decision (and for many escorts it helps them see if the client is actually sane and sober, especially at those "late night - I need you RIGHT NOW" calls). I once was absolutely convinced I wanted to see a guy, then he called me and within 2 minutes of hanging up after a 10-minute conversation I knew there was no way I would pay him even $5 to meet - the voice was very off-putting and obnoxious. I texted and cancelled immediately (the encounter was for the next day in the evening).

 

"Ask me" rates generally are a way of passing over an escort and looking more at those who clearly post the rate.

I will move to "ask" about a rate if the guy's photos, ads or reviews move me beyond my initial hesitation.

 

Finally, if I get the slightest hint that this will be an a la carte menu encounter (pay for various activities as we progress) I move on immediately. I tell an escort from the get-go what I expect for the hour or two, activities I assume are within the boundaries acceptable to both or which are on my side non-negotiables or deal-changers. The slippery slope here is that in an e-mail if you get explicit, some escorts mark you off as a police officer or something and drop you; this is why I offer to speak with the guy on the phone to "discuss our encounter' (but even this is not an assurance that I am not in law enforcement; it is tricky I admit).

[MiamiLooker]

I'm curious -- could someone explain to me the thinking behind "ask me" rate postings for hourly in/out call fees? Possibly makes sense for overnight/weekend charges, but I'm wondering if there's anything I should know/be wary of if contacting a guy advertising such rates on an hourly basis. Risk averse to potential legal issues? Ala carte charges? Trying to charge the most the individual client will bear? Willing to negotiate? My first reaction is that it's someone to avoid. I welcome being corrected/educated if I'm wrong.

 

The only way you’re going to find out is simple: ask the escort.

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

For those of us (me included) who find it a bit annoying when someone advertises their rate as "Ask Me", I don't think the issue is that we don't EVER want to discuss rates - e.g. in the context of the escort who might offer a last minute discount (a phenomenon I've yet to encounter) or when inquiring about the rate for a multi-hour appointment - but rather, it just adds an extra level of complexity into the decision making process - especially if one is trying to decide who to hire in a city with many options like NY, LA, or London. If I'm in NY on business and am trying to put together a short-list of potential hires, "Ask Me" rates don't help matters any. Typically, I don't like to contact someone until I'm pretty sure I want to hire them. So last thing I want is to have four "Ask Me"s on my short list, which will result in me having to contact each of them to ask what their rate is. When they tell me and ask if I want to book an appointment, what am I supposed to "No, actually, I'm just compiling my short list and needed that data point, thanks, goodbye"??

 

My other issue with "Ask Me" rates is that I do use rates for screening purposes... not in the sense that I'm looking for a bargain and will put the $200/hr guys in front of the $250/hr guys, etc., but again, if I'm in NYC, I know the going rate is $200-$300/hr (with well known porn stars in the $300-400/hr range), so a $100 rate would be a red flag, as would a $500 rate. And if you're charging Brodie Sinclair rates, then just tell me up front and don't make me waste my time contacting you. I'm not going to find your $700/hr rate any less shocking over the phone than I would in print.

 

From the escort perspective I find it odd when clients DON’T ask questions, and like Steven almost everyone who contacts me asks me about my rates and other services even though this information is already posted. I don’t find this to be annoying at all—rather I find it to show that the client wants to be informed before making a hiring decision and is confirming what he’s read to be accurate.

 

I am not nearly so naive as to believe a client looks at my ad, and only my ad when coming to DC and making the decision to hire. When someone contacts me, this type of inquiry does just fine: “Hi, I’m _____ and will be in DC on ____. I am a __, __, __, and am looking for (insert type of experience here). Please let me know what your availability would be for (date/time) and if you can (host/come to my hotel), as well as your rate for (length of time).” This says nothing whatsoever about shortlists, data points, etc. and gets you the information you need, correct?

 

Now, If I were hiring (and I've had to check out other escorts for clients before)... my concerns would be as follows:

 

Do you have bad/any reviews at all? (bad = no unless there’s a good rebuttal)

Are you even available during the time I’m here? (no = no)

How well do you communicate and what do you reveal during our discussion? (poorly/1-word, etc = no)

What is your body type/what do you look like? (bad pics or not my taste = no)

What services do you offer/not offer? (certain things off the table = no)

 

And then finally... What is your rate?

 

It’s not that I wouldn’t be concerned about rate—but even if someone puts ASK ME, I know it’s not that hard to find out. I take into consideration that most guys are probably going to be within $50 of each other in a given market. And by checking reviews, you’re going to get an idea of what this person charges based on prior appointments. To me it’s FAR more frustrating to get all the data about an escort and then find out as the last factor that they won’t even be in town when I am, or that they conduct themselves like a child when talking to me. These are all steps EVERY CLIENT should be taking with EVERY POTENTIAL HIRE.