Live and Learn

[tallguy]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

He asked that I provide my phone number so he could call and have a quick chat. We arranged that he would call the day before our scheduled meeting. When he didn't call I sent him a text message and left him a voicemail confirming our meeting the following day.

 

When I had not heard from him the day of our meeting I sent him a text asking him to call. I never heard from him. I sent him an email asking him what happened.

 

I received a response today(our meeting was for yesterday) which said "my apologies, I got busy with my pre-paid appointments and just now had time to check my email." Needless to say I was floored by his response. What pre-paid appointments? He never mentioned prepaying our meeting when he confirmed the date and time back to me. His response went on to say he was free to meet today between 12p-2pm if I would like. if not he would see me next time he came to town.

 

I somewhat politely responded and said the time he offered would not work for me and he wouldn't see me next time he came to town.

 

I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience. It is obvious this person thinks very highly of himself and has no intention of apologizing for flaking on our appointment that he confirmed in writing. I definitely would not consider ever meeting up with this escort as it is clear to me he can't manage his business properly and keep confirmed appointments.

 

Am I wrong for feeling this strong about this situation?

[Kevin Slater]

I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience.

 

No dice. Daddy doesn't accept no-show reviews.

 

Kevin Slater

[down_to_business]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

...I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience. It is obvious this person thinks very highly of himself and has no intention of apologizing for flaking on our appointment that he confirmed in writing. I definitely would not consider ever meeting up with this escort as it is clear to me he can't manage his business properly and keep confirmed appointments.

 

Am I wrong for feeling this strong about this situation?

 

As Kevin said, you won't be able to review a no show. Whether you agree or not with that, those are the rules. I have been where you are, including being out pre-paid airfare and other significant travel expenses. You will never get the opportunity to warn people about it or discuss it here. I would venture a guess that you aren't the first person that the escort has done this with, but again there is no way for you to know that information or warn others here.

 

Are you wrong to feel the way you feel. Absolutely not. You are entitled to feel the way you feel.

 

Does that mean others will feel the same way as you do. Absolutely not. A few might, most won't.

 

You also won't get a lot of sympathy here. Some will even blame you for the situation. Some will say you were better off being stood up than meeting this person. Others will say that you are a psycho and that any escort would be nuts to meet you ever. Many would tell you to get over yourself, grow-up, stop being a baby or that there are many other fish in the sea. Some will chastise you for bring it up at all without naming specific names, which you would get in trouble here for doing (but that is irrelevant to them). It can be a very welcoming community here. Of course if the situation was reversed, and you were the one who didn't show, these same people who think this is ok would be screaming for your head and demanding you compensate the escort. This whole thing doesn't work when there isn't mutual respect for both clients and escorts.

 

My take is that it sucks to have people show no respect for you or your time. I also think you would be nuts to ever consider pre-paying for an appointment because I assure you that your level of negative feelings would be 10 fold when not only he didn't show up but he also kept your deposit. Of course I am sure the escort would "make it up to you some day" whatever that means. Unfortunately, this won't be the last time some escort does this to you. Hopefully, those will be few and far between, however, and that you have several good experiences along the way.

[Traveler North]

Hey Tallguy, I had the same experience with Derek Atlas in Vegas. Except I never heard from him with an explanation.!

[instudiocity]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

He asked that I provide my phone number so he could call and have a quick chat. We arranged that he would call the day before our scheduled meeting. When he didn't call I sent him a text message and left him a voicemail confirming our meeting the following day.

Is it possible the escort had a sudden change in an appointment he was already in? A change from a few hours to overnight or even a 24 hour appointment? Sure he should have notified you, but if in the midst of an appointment, do you really want him to pull out his notes about you to let you know?

 

When I had not heard from him the day of our meeting I sent him a text asking him to call. I never heard from him. I sent him an email asking him what happened.

Not that you said anything wrong or said anything in a manner that would be interpreted differently by the escort when he read it, there is the possibility that your text and email were a bit off-putting to the escort recipient. In his mind, he may believe that because there was no phone call the day before the appointment, the appointment was not confirmed - by him.

 

I received a response today(our meeting was for yesterday) which said "my apologies, I got busy with my pre-paid appointments and just now had time to check my email." Needless to say I was floored by his response. What pre-paid appointments? He never mentioned prepaying our meeting when he confirmed the date and time back to me. His response went on to say he was free to meet today between 12p-2pm if I would like. if not he would see me next time he came to town.

You may have been floored by his response, but I would read that as a legitimate response to you. And what other appointments he had are frankly none of our business. Remember he's traveling... maybe he was traveling to see another client who paid his airfare and hotel for him to come to your city. Can you image the possibility that the client responsible for the visit to your city might have changed up the appointment so that the escort was no longer available to visit you and even unable to respond to your text and email? Is it possible, the escort believed in the urgency of the moment that he didn't have a 'confirmed' appointment since he never phoned you the day before?

 

I somewhat politely responded and said the time he offered would not work for me and he wouldn't see me next time he came to town.

What does 'somewhat politely' mean? Did you somewhat impolitely, too?

 

I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience. It is obvious this person thinks very highly of himself and has no intention of apologizing for flaking on our appointment that he confirmed in writing. I definitely would not consider ever meeting up with this escort as it is clear to me he can't manage his business properly and keep confirmed appointments.

Thank you for recognizing that you aren't thinking clearly about this right now. You cannot submit a review of an appointment that never happened to Daddy's Reviews. It is not obvious this person is as you describe him, arrogant, impolite or flakily. And you put in quotes that he said, "...my apologies...". You maybe can't see the situation from his perspective and he doesn't see if from your perspective.

 

Am I wrong for feeling this strong about this situation?

I don't think you're WRONG, just uninformed, emotional and inconsiderate of the escort's situation in the matter. Wanting to strike out against a person you've never met and do damage to his reputation because you feel slighted is probably why Daddy doesn't permit reviews of no-show appointments. I believe every review should be honest - giving both positive and negative information with the goal of communicating how the interlude went. Deciding first to be negative or positive may be a method of review but that decision also taints the outcome of the review - not all the information about the encounter comes out.

[maninsoma]

Is it possible the escort had a sudden change in an appointment he was already in? A change from a few hours to overnight or even a 24 hour appointment? Sure he should have notified you, but if in the midst of an appointment, do you really want him to pull out his notes about you to let you know?

 

Not that you said anything wrong or said anything in a manner that would be interpreted differently by the escort when he read it, there is the possibility that your text and email were a bit off-putting to the escort recipient. In his mind, he may believe that because there was no phone call the day before the appointment, the appointment was not confirmed - by him.

 

You may have been floored by his response, but I would read that as a legitimate response to you. And what other appointments he had are frankly none of our business. Remember he's traveling... maybe he was traveling to see another client who paid his airfare and hotel for him to come to your city. Can you image the possibility that the client responsible for the visit to your city might have changed up the appointment so that the escort was no longer available to visit you and even unable to respond to your text and email? Is it possible, the escort believed in the urgency of the moment that he didn't have a 'confirmed' appointment since he never phoned you the day before?

 

What does 'somewhat politely' mean? Did you somewhat impolitely, too?

 

Thank you for recognizing that you aren't thinking clearly about this right now. You cannot submit a review of an appointment that never happened to Daddy's Reviews. It is not obvious this person is as you describe him, arrogant, impolite or flakily. And you put in quotes that he said, "...my apologies...". You maybe can't see the situation from his perspective and he doesn't see if from your perspective.

 

I don't think you're WRONG, just uninformed, emotional and inconsiderate of the escort's situation in the matter. Wanting to strike out against a person you've never met and do damage to his reputation because you feel slighted is probably why Daddy doesn't permit reviews of no-show appointments. I believe every review should be honest - giving both positive and negative information with the goal of communicating how the interlude went. Deciding first to be negative or positive may be a method of review but that decision also taints the outcome of the review - not all the information about the encounter comes out.

 

Seems like you have lots of excuses for the poor behavior on the part of this escort. While a lot of what you wrote makes sense in terms of why the escort may have needed to cancel, the bottom line is that the escort could have at least contacted the client to indicate that he wasn't going to keep the appointment. I think that any escort who gets to the point of setting a specific date and time with a prospective client should either show up or at least call in advance to cancel, not just leave the client hanging, wondering what's going on and whether the escort intends to keep the appointment. Then again, maybe I'm biased because I've had this happen to me a couple of times as well. On two occasions, there wasn't even a discussion that there would be further communication prior to the appointment -- I had already given the guys my address. It's quite irritating -- particularly if one is a bottom -- to prepare for an appointment and then sit there waiting only to eventually realize that the escort isn't going to show up and is no longer answering his phone.

[+ Gar1eth]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

He asked that I provide my phone number so he could call and have a quick chat. We arranged that he would call the day before our scheduled meeting. When he didn't call I sent him a text message and left him a voicemail confirming our meeting the following day.

 

When I had not heard from him the day of our meeting I sent him a text asking him to call. I never heard from him. I sent him an email asking him what happened.

 

I received a response today(our meeting was for yesterday) which said "my apologies, I got busy with my pre-paid appointments and just now had time to check my email." Needless to say I was floored by his response. What pre-paid appointments? He never mentioned prepaying our meeting when he confirmed the date and time back to me. His response went on to say he was free to meet today between 12p-2pm if I would like. if not he would see me next time he came to town.

 

I somewhat politely responded and said the time he offered would not work for me and he wouldn't see me next time he came to town.

 

I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience. It is obvious this person thinks very highly of himself and has no intention of apologizing for flaking on our appointment that he confirmed in writing. I definitely would not consider ever meeting up with this escort as it is clear to me he can't manage his business properly and keep confirmed appointments.

 

Am I wrong for feeling this strong about this situation?

 

If the situation is as you have described, I'm thinking that the majority of us clients would feel the same way too. While you can't review him on Daddy's, if he advertises on M4RN, you can enter a written review of a no-show meeting. You can also enter a starred review, but at least in the past, an escort was allowed to delete a certain number of starred reviews per month.

 

Gman

[robberbaron4u]

Whatever happened to that cardinal rule of doing business "the customer is always right"? "Prepaid appointments"?? Please. . .hubris is an affliction, not a virtue.

[instudiocity]

Seems like you have lots of excuses for the poor behavior on the part of this escort. While a lot of what you wrote makes sense in terms of why the escort may have needed to cancel, the bottom line is that the escort could have at least contacted the client to indicate that he wasn't going to keep the appointment...

Sir, I made no excuse for this unknown escort's behavior, only speculations as to another perspective of the events as revealed by a quite emotional wronged party.

[down_to_business]

Seems like you have lots of excuses for the poor behavior on the part of this escort. While a lot of what you wrote makes sense in terms of why the escort may have needed to cancel, the bottom line is that the escort could have at least contacted the client to indicate that he wasn't going to keep the appointment. I think that any escort who gets to the point of setting a specific date and time with a prospective client should either show up or at least call in advance to cancel, not just leave the client hanging, wondering what's going on and whether the escort intends to keep the appointment. Then again, maybe I'm biased because I've had this happen to me a couple of times as well. On two occasions, there wasn't even a discussion that there would be further communication prior to the appointment -- I had already given the guys my address. It's quite irritating -- particularly if one is a bottom -- to prepare for an appointment and then sit there waiting only to eventually realize that the escort isn't going to show up and is no longer answering his phone.

 

+1

[Newly]

I'm sure there are reasons why escorts act like this, but I can't help but smile when I see all the postings about business drying up. It's simple, there are tons of escorts and not that many clients who are willing to spend thousands on them and treat them right and with a lot of respect, but that works both ways. If I contact a new escort by their preferred method (email, text, whatever) and I don't get a reply in 2 days I cross them off the list permanently. I'm paying them, not vice versa and there is a huge supply to pick from. As for those who are hugely popular now and think that allows them to act differently, they may want to consider how long their popularity will last.

[tyro]

Newtothis speaks truth.

T

[Strafe13]

Another +1. This escort acted unprofessionally. If, per the speculative excuses proffered, the escort didn't think there was an actual appointment unless he called to confirm it (irrespective of the fact that a date/time had been set), what kind of a business model is that where the client is left at the whim of the escort as to whether he would, or would not, call? So a call means they're confirmed, but radio silence, which could mean that any number of things had happened, should have only been interpreted as communicating that the previously scheduled appointment was not going to happen? Ridiculous. The escort should have called when he said he would, and, at a minimum, if he wanted to cancel (& he'd always be within his rights to do so for any number of reasons), he should have done so by calling, or sending an e-mail or text, the latter of which could literally take less than a minute to do. IMHO, none of these proffered excuses pass muster. Cancellations happen. In and of itself, it wasn't such a big deal. It's the lack of communication, thus leaving the client hanging, that is what's appalling about the way this escort conducted himself.

 

All that being said, if the escort admitted to his error and apologized, and if you think it was sincere then you should just let it go. Doesn't mean you have to hire him again if you feel he's unreliable, but holding on to this does you no good. I'm unsure of the specific rules, but I'd always thought that while this site prohibits no-show reviews, the forum was the only venue to discuss such scenarios. So, I see no problem with venting in the forum.

 

P.S., I totally agree with maninsoma's take on bottoms. For those of us who do extensive prep work, last minute cancellations can be "quite irritating," to say the least. Although in this situation, had the escort cancelled during the phone call on the day before, then it wouldn't have been so bad.

 

Seems like you have lots of excuses for the poor behavior on the part of this escort. While a lot of what you wrote makes sense in terms of why the escort may have needed to cancel, the bottom line is that the escort could have at least contacted the client to indicate that he wasn't going to keep the appointment. I think that any escort who gets to the point of setting a specific date and time with a prospective client should either show up or at least call in advance to cancel, not just leave the client hanging, wondering what's going on and whether the escort intends to keep the appointment. Then again, maybe I'm biased because I've had this happen to me a couple of times as well. On two occasions, there wasn't even a discussion that there would be further communication prior to the appointment -- I had already given the guys my address. It's quite irritating -- particularly if one is a bottom -- to prepare for an appointment and then sit there waiting only to eventually realize that the escort isn't going to show up and is no longer answering his phone.

[tom1980]

Is it possible the escort had a sudden change in an appointment he was already in? A change from a few hours to overnight or even a 24 hour appointment? Sure he should have notified you, but if in the midst of an appointment, do you really want him to pull out his notes about you to let you know?

 

Yes, I do. I've been nearing the end of an appointment with an escort, found myself enjoying his company, and asked to extend my time with him. When that happens, I expect the escort to decline my offer if he has another commitment. If he told me he needed to check his email or voicemail, send a text, or make a phone call to confirm his availability, I'd be glad to see that the guy is running his business in a professional manner. Although I wouldn't appreciate an escort emailing, texting, or calling another client during an already confirmed appointment, if I try to add more time, I cannot complain about the escort taking care of business he planned to handle after my appointment before he spends "extra" time with me.

[rvwnsd]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

He asked that I provide my phone number so he could call and have a quick chat. We arranged that he would call the day before our scheduled meeting. When he didn't call I sent him a text message and left him a voicemail confirming our meeting the following day.

 

When I had not heard from him the day of our meeting I sent him a text asking him to call. I never heard from him. I sent him an email asking him what happened.

 

I received a response today(our meeting was for yesterday) which said "my apologies, I got busy with my pre-paid appointments and just now had time to check my email." Needless to say I was floored by his response. What pre-paid appointments? He never mentioned prepaying our meeting when he confirmed the date and time back to me. His response went on to say he was free to meet today between 12p-2pm if I would like. if not he would see me next time he came to town.

 

I somewhat politely responded and said the time he offered would not work for me and he wouldn't see me next time he came to town.

 

I have half a mind to write a negative review about this experience. It is obvious this person thinks very highly of himself and has no intention of apologizing for flaking on our appointment that he confirmed in writing. I definitely would not consider ever meeting up with this escort as it is clear to me he can't manage his business properly and keep confirmed appointments.

 

Am I wrong for feeling this strong about this situation?

 

I don't think it is a question of right or wrong. You feel how you feel. Maybe it sounds like I am splitting hairs, but I think there is a difference between the feeling (upset, angry) and the reaction. In your position, I would feel upset and possibly angry that the guy did not keep our appointment. I suppose one could say there wasn't an appointment because he didn't confirm, but even in that case he left you hanging. That isn't OK. However, I do think you are reacting too strongly and are jumping to conclusions about his thinking highly of himself, inability to run a business, and lack of intention to apologize. He was wrapped up with a client or clients and forgot to call. He should have called, but he didn't. He did apologize to you. I doubt I would have told him I wouldn't hire him in the future (even if I decided I wouldn't) because it closes the door on getting a better apology, which you seem to want.

[Nvr2Thick]

I noticed a somewhat well reviewed out of town escort was going to be visiting my city. I had admired his reviews for sometime and jumped at the chance to snag some of his time while he was in town.

 

I sent him and email after a few quick exchanges our time was set, or so I thought.

 

He asked that I provide my phone number so he could call and have a quick chat. We arranged that he would call the day before our scheduled meeting. When he didn't call I sent him a text message and left him a voicemail confirming our meeting the following day.

 

When I had not heard from him the day of our meeting I sent him a text asking him to call. I never heard from him. I sent him an email asking him what happened.

 

 

It was reasonable of you to expect that you had arranged an appointment with this escort. Many escorts operate this way. Many escorts don't. I'm just guessing here, but I believe that this escort was really just pulling together a list of prospects. He finalized his calendar when he arrived. The day before your appointment he probably went through his list of prospects and called through the list of promising client candidates and firmed things up. If one of his now-scheduled clients flaked he went through the prospects and tried to fill the gap. That's probably what he was doing when he called you. The late Mike Betts worked things this way. The first few times he visited my city he'd call me at odd times sometimes earlier or later than my planned appointment and asked if I was ready. The more he got to know me the more reliable he was with our appointments.

 

Are you wrong for feeling strongly? No, that's how you feel. Some guys on this forum are always going to give a scholarly look at an opposite point of view because disagreeing is so much fun. You're disappointed because you were looking forward to a good fuck from a hot guy, and you're disappointed because you had expectations of professionalism.

 

The live and learn subject is correct though. If a plumber blows off your appointment without calling because he said he found a better gig, that's unprofessional. If a traveling escort does the same we have to chalk it up to the variety of expectations, behaviors and standards for escorts. There's no such thing as a sure thing with this type of meeting.

 

By all means drop his name on the forum if you want people to know who it is. We've seen a few such accounts go unmoderated over the past weeks. Feel free also just to privately set your expectations a bit lower for the next experience. Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised.

[Okliehomo]

Always good advice....

 

"Raise your skirt and lower your expectations".

[Newly]

So a simple question. Escorts do not depend on Daddys to provide them with everything they need, because they are aware that it needs to serve the interest of both clients and escorts. Because of this they use sites like National Blacklist and Black listed John which serve only their needs and allow them to quickly spread the word if a client doesn't pay, flakes out, or what not. You can't count on sites that advertise escorts, because all their money comes from the escort - so you know who they will favor thus allowing fake ads, flakes and what not. It is very clear that a lot of clients are tired of wasting their time trying to deal with escorts who don't reply, don't show, etc. For some clients who are retired this may not be a big issue and, in fact, may help kill time and be part of the thrill, but lots of clients have stressful jobs where they make enough money to hire escorts, but quite frankly don't have the time to waste sending multiple emails, calls, booking rooms and taking time off only to have the escort either flake out and never change. Times are also changing and with escorts now jumping between grinder, adam4adam, backpage, etc. there is really a lot of lost opportunity if it takes weeks for a review to appear, including some very desirable escorts who charge a lot less. There is a plentiful supply of escorts and unless one is fixated on a particular person it's not that there aren't any available, but that trying to find one who isn't unreliable is like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Having a site where clients could give quick, useful information on how long it took a client to respond and how good they were about showing up and if they were more or less as described would be worth it's weight in gold. These wouldn't be long drawn out literary masterpieces describing all the details of an encounter but simply a short checklist stating things such as escort as described (Y/N), Time to respond to inquiry (1 day - longer), Showed up on time (Y/N). This would be a client only site. It may not be "fair" but neither are the escort blacklisting sites and to busy executives such a site would be worth it's weight in gold. No more sending out ten emails to only get two responses, and then hoping that you haven't taken a day off of work for nothing. If there isn't a site like that it would seem like an excellent opportunity for someone to set one up and make money by charging for access. Heck, it wouldn't even have to be a site, it could just be an email address to send completed forms to and a weekly or monthly email sent to members with this information. Anyhow, does anyone know if a site like this exists? If not, there certainly seems to be a need for one.

[gallahadesquire]

As to misunderstandings

 

I know you understand

What you think I said

BUT

I'm not sure you realize

that what you heard

is not what I meant.

 

P.S. Apparently, Allen Greenspan used this, but as: I know you think you understand what you think I said ...

but I learned it as a leftover on a bulletin board in my office / lab at Raytheon Research in 1974.

Yes, histoire ancienne ..

[jimboivyo]

I'm sure there are reasons why escorts act like this, but I can't help but smile when I see all the postings about business drying up. It's simple, there are tons of escorts and not that many clients who are willing to spend thousands on them and treat them right and with a lot of respect, but that works both ways. If I contact a new escort by their preferred method (email, text, whatever) and I don't get a reply in 2 days I cross them off the list permanently. I'm paying them, not vice versa and there is a huge supply to pick from. As for those who are hugely popular now and think that allows them to act differently, they may want to consider how long their popularity will last.

 

If an escort treats his clients right and racks up reviews, his popularity is the last thing he'll need to worry about

 

the escorts here that complain about their biz only have themselves to blame I reckon. bad attitude = no clients.