Talvin DeMachio's Client Hygiene Requirements

[Guy Fawkes]

Personally, I don't feel that his requests are "Over the top". I too have a fetish for "Squeaky Clean" partners. It makes a tremendous difference to my enjoyment. And if I'm enjoying it more, I suspect they are too.

 

Case in point: I am allergic to most perfumes. If you wear a strong scent and we're in a enclosed space (say a car) I can be violently ill in a matter of minutes. It is far less embarrassing to a partner if you point it out in advance, your expectations.

 

Now mind you, I also find showering with someone to be a huge turn-on all by itself. :9 But the point is that I feel MUCH less inhibited when all the parts have been recently been scrubbed.

[Guest jwraustin]

I agree with Daddy...Talvin's requests really aren't "over the top."

 

Most people as a matter of habit will show up for their "date", with a clean body and clean booty (if they are going to bottom). Unfortunately, there are a few people who just show up, no matter what state they were in when the time rolls around.

 

I was with someone recently who could have used a good cleaning down under. When the time came for some serious fucking, much to my chagrin I found out that we had company. I politely retrieved a fleet enema, handed it to him, and waited while he got clean. (Sorta spoils the moment)

 

Another time, I arrived at a client's home, and is was apparent he hadn't showered or shaved in some time. He was a mess, along with his home. That time I politely declined the call, and left.

 

So, I understand Talvin's cleanliness requests. Some people just need to be reminded about their ABC's of hygiene. Not only does it make for a better experience, but as a matter of health, its very important too.

 

Jon Dean

http://www.manfuck.net

[+ Lucky]

Well, Zak's response today indicates that he too should be sending out hygiene instructions!

[phage]

I guess it depends on the nature of the request and how it is presented. I came very close to hiring one of the “superstars” a couple of years ago. (I ended up having to cancel and still regret it!) When the appointment was confirmed, he sent me a sort of FAQ note. There was a section on cleanliness but it was very standard stuff. Basically, it boiled down to, “If you want me to touch it or kiss it, then it should be freshly washed.” He also gave assurances that he would have showered within the last hour and would be squeaky clean anywhere I cared to explore. It was all very business-like, but hardly offensive.

[nate_sf]

>I guess it depends on the nature of the request and how it is

>presented.

 

Exactly. I'm familiar with the particular hygiene requests in question... a few months ago, Talvin was scheduled to come to San Francisco, so I sent him an e-mail asking the usual stuff about availability, rates, etc. A few days later he sent back a form letter that had a very offensive tone as it discussed a battery of hygiene issues, alongside very specific rate information. That's all fine and should be discussed, but the way it was presented gave the impression that he didn't have much respect for the client or his feelings. It kind of left me thinking 'jeez, what kind of person do you think I am?'

 

In person, I'm sure he's very charming and sexy, but the e-mail was offensive enough to me, at least, to make me change my mind. My thought is that if someone's going to pay top dollar to see an escort, the least they can expect is to be treated decently.

 

Perhaps in developing a form letter which discusses matters of hygiene, having a friend proof read it to make sure it is not inadvertently offensive is a good idea, especially if it's going to be widely distributed?

[+ Axiom2001]

Oh, Daddy! Yesssssssssssssssss! Everything that you cited in your review can definitely be echoed by me. Although I am not allergic to perfumes-- I'd prefer that my partner not be wearing any and that he has recently bathed.

 

I just returned home from a very hot date with an escort which I had last night in San Francisco. Since I like to kiss, he emailed me stating that he too kissed only if the oral hygiene was such. I returned his email stating that I agreed with him.

 

I can do a lot with a man's pits if they are devoid of deoderant and smell fresh and clean; I can devour a mouth that has a natural clean taste; I can eat ass if it seems sparkling clean; I can give my partner a tongue bath if he's hot and naturally clean!

 

I don't like funk; it does not turn me on... So in Talvin's defence, I'll say:"You go man!"

[Rick Munroe]

>I don't like funk

 

Really? Not even Bootsy Collins or Graham Central Station or early Commodores or Prince or the Brothers Johnson? That shit gets me goin.'

[Rick Munroe]

I won't comment on how Talvin runs his business because it's none of mine & I've never worked with him. However, personally, I'm always afraid to bring up the issue of hygiene, whether beforehand or in person (if a problem exists). I've never been insulted when a client emails & asks me to make sure I'm clean...not just because I always am, but because I'm not easily offended. But I could just imagine someone with thinner skin taking it the wrong way if I were to say something seemingly as innocuous as, "Please be showered." Like I've said, we shouldn't have to say such things anyway. However, I do hate perfumes/colognes and have had to suffer in silence once or twice because of it.

 

Here's an idea. What if we posted an open letter or guide for clients...sort of a to-do list of how to prepare for a meeting with an escort, from the escorts point of view? I wouldn't mind composing it if other escorts want to give me some feedback & perhaps Hooboy or Daddy could post it somewhere permanently.

[Guest jwraustin]

Great idea, Rick......

[VaHawk]

Is this really a major problem that would require a "do bee" "don't bee" formal list? I can't imagine that a client would not practice basic hygiene (i.e. teeth brushed and flossed, mouthwash, shower, douched, etc.). I do however agree that colognes should not be used, as I also find them intolerable and hate it when the escort has used a lot of it, as you can taste it for hours afterward. Also, this list should apply to escorts also, as I have had the displeasure of being with one who did not shower from a previous engagement (nothing like smelling another man's cum when you go down) and one who admitted to not brushing first (unfortunately an overnighter who exuded the lovely aroma of stale garlic all night). LOL! On a lighter note, what happened to you new avatar? If that was you, you sure are a handsome man!

[+ deej]

>Is this really a major problem that would require a "do bee"

>"don't bee" formal list? I can't imagine that a client would

>not practice basic hygiene

 

It's obviously a problem or it wouldn't be such a frequent discussion topic. :o

 

A large number of clients are seeing escorts (or even men) for the first time and have no idea what to do before-hand or what to expect. The checklist Rick proposed could be a truly valuable resource for them.

 

Unfortunately, there's another breed of client that's just plain stoopid and NO checklist will help them because they won't think it applies. However, this site has materially improved escort hiring experiences for many clients. If we can turn the tables and improve the experience for escorts as well, I say GO FOR IT!

[Rick Munroe]

>On a lighter note, what happened to you new avatar? If that

>was you, you sure are a handsome man!

 

(warning: here comes that ego again)Well, if that was a handsome man, it sure was me. You know, I saw that my avatar was missing for a while earlier tonight. Was it really temporarily replaced by my face pic? Gosh, I hope Mom wasn't escort hunting again tonight.

[Guest Mikki]

Someone told me about a person who went through a compulsvie sexual recovery program, somewhere in the US to work on his addiction to escorts/prostitutes. The doctor/therapist had the patient write down the steps he takes just prior to the act with the escort/prostitute.

When he told the doctor, he showers, he was stopped by the doctor who added........."shower??, why would you shower to have sex with someone you are going to pay?" I was horrified by this comment, but the reasoning is, the addicted person lived in fantasy about the prostitutes/escorts, believing the laison to be a romantic encounter they could not live without.......when indeed it is just a business deal, service. And until an addict knows at a gut level that it is all about money and fantasy, he will be totally addicted to the fantasy, which is not real, as the prostitute /escort is doing a job, much like a carpenter who comes to your house to do maintenance. When the illusion is shattered, then one can be returned to some choice and use sex workers at their discretion and not as a necessity, like needing a hit of cocaine or heroin.

[Rick Munroe]

Am I the only one who is baffled by this post? What does it have to do with washing one's pits and ass and crotch? (I wish we had a confused smiley. Daddy, can you work on that please?)

[Flower]

>When he told the doctor, he showers, he was stopped by the

>doctor who added........."shower??, why would you shower to

>have sex with someone you are going to pay?"

*****

>When the illusion is shattered, then one can be

>returned to some choice and use sex workers at their

>discretion and not as a necessity, like needing a hit of

>cocaine or heroin.

 

I hope your friend wasn't paying a lot for this kinda advise. Did your friend shower and use deodorant before he went to the shrink's office? And if he had not and smelled offensive, would the shrink have applied the same reasoning and put up with it just cause he was being paid?

 

Being clean for a sexual encounter is mutually expected and benificial--if your partner (escort or non-escort) can get into the scene easier then your enjoyment is bound to be greater. It seems like only common sense and I'm all for setting out some clean hygiene guidelines ahead of time.

 

And since when does observing some basic rules of common courtesy mean you are having a "dream life.?" If I have a worker to my home to repair an appliance or the roof or whatever, I don't hesitate to offer a cup of coffee, soft drink or even lunch if the time is such, despite the fact that I am paying for their service. Common courtesy in everyday life extends to the bedroom even more so. So, IMHO, the theripist is the one out of touch with reality--sounds like he is str8 to me }(

[Guest BigSquirt]

Personal hygiene is a two-way street between any two partners, be they client/escort or otherwise. While I have no doubt that there are plenty of clients out there who are total gross-outs when it comes to hygiene (or, more accurately, the lack thereof), in all fairness, I've met more than a few escorts who were also sorely lacking in the hygiene department. And I'm talking about guys with multiple positive reviews here and ostensibly stellar reputations.

 

I am scrupulously (is anally the right word here?) squeaky clean prior to any meeting with an escort--freshly scrubbed in every nook and cranny, teeth brushed/mouth gargled etc. No deodorants or perfumes applied, and even though I'm a smoker, I refrain from lighting up until I'm certain that an escort is comfortable with it after meeting.

 

That said, I've encountered escorts (including those who charge at the high end of the spectrum) with horrid bad breath, crotches in desparate need of soap and water, and backsides that, to put it delicately, were sorely in need of attention (and not the kind I'm inclined to provide). I had to ask a highly-rated San Francisco-based escort reviewed many times positively here to take a trip to the shower with me after I was aghast at the goods offered, and this after we had discussed explicitly beforehand that I would be performing the topping duties. Everything went smoothly after that, but only because we hit it off before the clothes came off.

[Guest Pulsator]

OK, I'm the client who posted the review on Talvin.

One of the reasons I had hesitated setting up an appointment was the tone of the hygiene requirements, which, as one of the prior posters indicated, is rather off-putting. But then after reading through the reviews, it was clear to me that I shouldn't judge the guy by the tone of his writing. Some guys are better at communicating in person, some are better in writing. And when I finally met Talvin, I discovered he's a really nice guy.

And, as he explained to me, he wrote that stuff because of his past experiences with clients who had not taken precautions.

When you get right down to it, everything he asks people to do is quite reasonable.

I once met another escort whose website was very explicit about his prerequisites for kissing - the client should have brushed and flossed just prior to the appointment. Makes sense.

[Will]

I think this is a great idea. Deej is right that many, many guys here have never hired an escort. Not only do they come here looking for tips on hiring, they also come here trying to find out what to expect and how to go about the whole business. I know that the practical steps of engaging as escort for the first time were so confusing/frightening to me that I called an agency and let them do the work.

 

But even then, I really didn't know how I should, well, prepare myself before the escort came to my hotel. If the escorts who frequent this site could come up with some general guidelines for clients FROM THE ESCORTS' VIEWPOINTS, I think it would be a great help for a lot of people. It might even have a niche of its own somewhere on the board. Those who don't want to look at it or use it don't have to. But it would be terrific for people who feel a little shy or bewildered.

 

For instance, I've often noticed that when gay men feel nervous or self-conscious they will not only over-dress, they will also over-perfume. What's more, almost always they use run-of-the-mill cologne, which is harsh and smells worse and worse as it warms up. If I were an escort, I would hate that. But I can also imagine that somebody who's so nervous he's about to throw up from anxiety would overdo everything.

 

A list such as the one Rick proposes would save the escort the embarrassment of having to say something or suffer in silence, as Rick has done. It would also save the client the embarrassment of fearing that he had broken some rule that "everybody" knows.

 

For instance, do escorts expect the client to provide the lube and condoms, or should the client expect the escort to show up with his doctor's bag of goodies?

[+ Lucky]

RE: Dental Hygiene Requirements

 

Brushed and flossed right before the appointment, huh? Well, the way I leaned it in Safer Sex 101 (repeat course) was that you don't do those things 90 minutes before having oral sex and if you have had dental work it should be 24 hours before you take on the big one.

The reason of course is that these things irritate the gums and can cause bleeding, however slight. Now, how many of you guys want a strangers blood in your mouth or lapping around your dick?

 

And, why is it that one out of three escorts eats garlic before they see me?x(

[Talvin DeMachio]

I normally do not reply to messages in the message center anymore. But this one does call for me to speak out.

 

When I first started escorting a few years back. In the begining I had problems with a few clients that were not very clean. I am not talking about a little body odor. I am talking about smelling really bad like they had not showered at all that day (most of my appointments are in the evening).

 

I also a few times had my bottom clients NOT be so clean. One time I was fucking a client...and I started to smell something very unpleasant...when I looked down I had SHIT all over my lower abs. Needless to say I went limp in a heartbeat. He did say he was sorry and went to the bathroom to clean up. He came back exspecting me to continue where I left off. Sorry...but the moment was completely ruined. This is when I made the decision to have a standard E mail to all who write me about my services. Over the phone when people call I state the same thing.

 

Here is what I state in all my E mails. To some it may seem rude. It is just all business in E mail. I have had a few of my clients help me write it out so it does not sound too offensive. Notice I put a bunch of smile faces in the text. This is to show the person I am not trying to come across as an asshole.

 

As far as escorting goes....I enjoy doing everything except the following:

bottoming, bare-backing, S&M, scat and pissing. I do love safe and fun sex

 

Kissing: I do kiss. Like you, I prefer kissing someone with nice-smelling

breath. Whether we smoke (I don't), drink coffee or had a spicy meal

earlier that day, let's make the kissing better by having fresh breath when

we meet up.

 

Being Clean: Like you, I request that a person is smelling good and clean. I am going to be fresh smelling and I would expect the same from my partner. If you going to be bottoming for me PLEASE, take all necessary precautions so there are not accidents. There is nothing more embarrassing for the bottom to have an accident right in the middle of a session. And for me it can be a major turn off. Trust me I will be clean head to toe for you

 

(OMITED HERE IS WHAT I CHARGE)

 

Please let me know what you like to have done to you sexually. Be up front and honest. This way I know what to expect and will try my best to please you the best I know how

 

Final Note: I am a top, but two tops can have lots of fun too.

 

Talvin

 

 

 

http://www.talvindemachio.com

[guyinsf]

Why do I feel like that?

Why must I chase the cat?

Nuthin' but the dog in me.

 

WOOF!

[guyinsf]

This just goes to show that there are some really stupid therapists out there, particularly ones who may not even have a license to practice. (While this guy may have had a license, it isn't uncommon for problem-specific "programs" to run by laypeople.)

 

Okay -- who's going to make the first joke about "laypeople." ;-)

[Guest Dan]

I haven't been really follwing this thread that closely (too hard to when ur still on a 56K modem), but I didn't find anything that outrageous about Talvin's requests for cleanliness. People (usually clients) ask if I ever have a probelm with a client that I may not be turned on. A CLEAN out of shape client will always be more appealing to me than Brad Pitt's dirty twin!

 

Dan Dare

http://gaydar.co.uk/dandarela

[Rick Munroe]

>I am a top, but two tops can have lots of fun too.

 

Especially when they're tag teaming a deep-throat bottom. }(

[+ Axiom2001]

Dan, I am with you and the other respondents who did not find Mr. TD's requests out of line. I've read the sites of some other escorts who have made similar requests; I respect this and expect the same to be applied for all escorts and all clients.

 

One escort (in LA whom I have yet to meet) even requests that his clients wear very clean white socks--something which I too find to be somewhat sexy. Socks= the only wearing apparel one has on during a hot sexual act!