How to avoid providers under the influence?

[Nicedice]

Long story short, I recently hired a provider who has multiple positive reviews on this site, but showed up to my session high as a kite. I’m guessing it was fentanyl or another opioid — bro couldn’t manage simple small talk and seemed generally sluggish and confused. For reasons that would be complicated to explain, I decided the safest way to extract myself from the situation without drama was to pay him 1 for one hour and send him on his way. (I realize that may seem cowardly, but it really was the best option at the time, and not a huge financial loss for me).

I’m honestly not mad at him; it felt more sad than anything else. But I’m curious to hear from others how you avoid providers like this in the first place and how you deal with it when they do show up to a session under the influence of drugs.

Edited yesterday at 04:07 AM by Nicedice
more details

[TBD]

1 hour ago, Nicedice said:

(I realize that may seem cowardly, but it really was the best option at the time, and not a huge financial loss for me).

Not cowardly, and exactly the correct and safe and SMARTEST way to extract yourself from this situation. 

 

1 hour ago, Nicedice said:

how you avoid providers like this in the first place and how you deal with it when they do show up to a session under the influence of drugs.

Two things - #1. Don't hire provide who list that they are involved with PNP. 

and #2 - while it is indeed a sad situation, it is not your problem to fix him, but it is best that you leave a review here to warn others of your experience. It is not unfair to help others not be in this situation as well. 

You yourself may have benefited from others leaving warnings of this kind of danger. Pay it forward. 

And what to do when they show up high? exactly what you did do. The only other thing you can do is make sure it doesn't happen to someone else.

Wait a few weeks if you don't want to leave a review that he can trace back to you. 

Edited yesterday at 05:53 AM by TBD

[savantsav]

Check their ads for any keywords. 
 

PNP, Party, random G or K capital letters, clouds, smoke, crystal emojis or party hat emojis. “Long sessions” can also mean drug usage 

[ReynST]

30 minutes ago, TBD said:

You yourself may have benefited from others leaving warnings of this kind of danger. Pay it forward. 

I agree. The purpose of a review isn't to complement someone for a good job; it's to give future clients insight on what to expect from a client perspective.

[TorontoDrew]

20 hours ago, TBD said:

Two things - #1. Don't hire provide who list that they are involved with PNP. 

Thank you for the reminder. I've been looking for my next hire and the little head was looking to make the decision. 

[Midwestguy89]

Sorry this happened to you! In addition to what they recommend above I explicitly say when I reach out to them to say that I don’t party and am not interested in meeting up with guys who do. It’s direct but it helps set the stage in advance. Thankfully they’ve all acknowledged they either don’t party, or won’t party when meetings and it’s worked out for me (until it doesn’t) 

[jackcali]

3 hours ago, Midwestguy89 said:

Sorry this happened to you! In addition to what they recommend above I explicitly say when I reach out to them to say that I don’t party and am not interested in meeting up with guys who do. It’s direct but it helps set the stage in advance. Thankfully they’ve all acknowledged they either don’t party, or won’t party when meetings and it’s worked out for me (until it doesn’t) 

Good advice.  I've gone further, saying with a new hire that I'm sober (not true) and can't hang with someone who uses or is under the influence when I meet them.  I'm not a fan of medicalizing things, but  I think it makes the request more forcefully.  I'm looking for the escort to be present and engaged during our sessions and any alcohol and drug use diminishes that.  I used to have a regular who would smoke a joint before we met "just to take the edge off."  I asked him to stop (mostly because of the smell) and the very good sessions we had got WAY better.  

That being said, for a longer session, I'm happy to have a, um, cocktail with the escort or wine if we are eating (a meal) together.  

Edited 8 hours ago by jackcali

[MscleLovr]

I’ve only had 2 similar experiences over the years.

The first was a guy with whom I’d had 4 evening dates before. This time, he asked if he could stay overnight with me at my home. I clarified his intentions before I agreed. I showered before bed while he was showering in another bathroom. In bed, it quickly became clear that he’d ingested some substance he’d brought with him. I told him to get dressed and threw him out.

The second was an Aussie guy who turned up at my Sydney hotel-room reeking of alcohol. When he asked for a drink, I lied and said I only had water. He was fairly drunk but he offered to suck me off and swallow my load. I came; he went. 

IMO @Nicedice you were sensible and got rid of him as quickly as you could.

[tenderloin]

Definitely scour the profile for the giveaways like PNP, Party, and T.  A guy who is now advertising as NicoStylesXXX in NYC was my worst experience in this regard.  Was glad to get him out of the house without an incident, and after I posted about the experience here he let me know that he was not happy with me 😬   After that experience I have taken to asking providers, before confirming the appointment, if they party. If one says yes, I politely tell them "thanks but no thanks." 

I have also noticed some guys who seem very dependent on poppers.  I don't use poppers myself, but it seems to me that some guys seem to have developed an over-reliance on them in order to perform, and this seems to lead to performance problems. 

[Nicedice]

Thanks, all. What’s odd is that this provider specifically says “No PNP” in his ad, and multiple reviews here describe how charming and engaging he was. This makes me think the substance use must be a recent development and/or something he was able to hide for a long time.

Going forward, I’m leaning in the direction of going back to my personal policy of requesting a 5-minute video meeting with any provider who is unfamiliar to me before I’ll book them. I skipped that step this time because he seemed to have a good reputation here, but clearly that didn’t work well. (I’ve also had a few would-be providers flatly refuse an initial video meeting even though I offer financial compensation for it, which is itself a huge red flag). 

Edited 3 hours ago by Nicedice
clarity

[Nue2thegame]

Poppers seem to be preferred by those who plan to bottom and cialis or viagra by some who plan to top. Although versatility is great, these two classes of drugs don’t mix well, especially for the faint of heart. I know this is a little off topic but it did come up here.