Real Talk on massage rates - let me know your thoughts

[sfwysiwyg]

On 8/10/2025 at 3:09 PM, rustyrex said:

I mostly stopped hiring masseurs from the gay sites for anything but the extras.  I think some have the nerve to charge $200 for an hour for an unskilled, unlicensed, with no HE or anything else.  I had one guy pull that nonsense on me and he literally hurt me.  Gorgeous body with muscles but unskilled and decided to put his knuckles into my legs and ass a little too deeply and he didn't even take off his shirt.  Never again...  I've had better luck with the legal sites and they offer the HE and more for a lot less and they are trained with a license.  I still peruse the ads...mostly to scoff...but once in a while a diamond pops up that's worth the effort.  If my legal guys offer me full service I have no problem giving them a lot more.  

What are your preferred legal sites?   

In SF it is impossible to find a guy who is well trained and offers a decent HE for less than $300 on RM.  So I am interested in finding a couple long terms providers I can build a better working relationship with.

[Vulgarii]

On 8/10/2025 at 3:09 PM, rustyrex said:

I mostly stopped hiring masseurs from the gay sites for anything but the extras.  I think some have the nerve to charge $200 for an hour for an unskilled, unlicensed, with no HE or anything else.  I had one guy pull that nonsense on me and he literally hurt me.  Gorgeous body with muscles but unskilled and decided to put his knuckles into my legs and ass a little too deeply and he didn't even take off his shirt.  Never again...  I've had better luck with the legal sites and they offer the HE and more for a lot less and they are trained with a license.  I still peruse the ads...mostly to scoff...but once in a while a diamond pops up that's worth the effort.  If my legal guys offer me full service I have no problem giving them a lot more.  

 

Ah so this is what people are doing. Using the "legal" sites and still getting the "extras."

[Vulgarii]

On 7/21/2025 at 5:40 PM, Hey_Jay said:

When the hour massage rate was around 120-140 and 90 minutes is around 150 I get a lot of massages! Like 2-3 x a month
 

Now at 200 average for an hour massage (not to mention if you’re actually gonna get a good one) I’ve only been going once a month or sometimes less. 
 

I can still afford it if I want to but I’m really looking right now on the value for what you pay for. So my massage frequency definitely dropped more than 50%. I also, wonder if massage providers here are noticing the decline. Or is it just me? lol 

Do you ask beforehand about any extras like a HE, and do you describe yourself including age, maybe race? 

I do take all of that into consideration, especially if I cannot see your identity on the many apps and websites I use. 

[pubic_assistance]

On 8/1/2025 at 4:01 PM, TonyDown said:

Is 200 the new normal for a massage?

$200 is indeed the new normal for an erotic (happy ending) massage. 

[Nightowl]

On 8/11/2025 at 1:32 PM, Vegas_Millennial said:

Yes!  I'd rather have a good trained massage from an average looking guy than a horrible massage from a good looking guy at a premium price.

When you’re on your stomach and all you can see are the guy’s feet through the face cradle, all of the guy’s good looks mean nothing (unless you’re into feet)

[Nightowl]

On 8/1/2025 at 8:22 PM, JamesB said:

 

May I suggest doing what’s worked well for me? I also use an envelope to pay providers which I prepare in advance with just their exact fee. If I choose to tip, I simply add it afterward, it's always easier to put more in than to take some out.

I usually fold the bills for the flat fee together in one pocket with the anticipated tip bills folded together in another pocket.  A trip to the bathroom after I get dressed allows me to change the tip amount if necessary.  

[TantricMD]

Who is paying 250 to 300 for a first time meeting with an unknown masseur that has no experience, reviews, just a few hot photos, and minimal descriptions? And they aren't even willing to answer some basic qualifying questions before asking you to "take it or leave it" as is. Who is falling for this new baseline "you need me more than I need you" marketing? Don't we have leverage (we make the dollars so it should make sense) to push back until we receive more reputable treatment as a standard? 

I can see paying a premium once becoming a regular client to gain some credibility on a more reliable relationship for better availability. But this new norm of post-COVID 100% inflation/masseur tarriff is just ridiculous. 

Can we as clients bring that demand down to a more reasonable level? Send a message that if you cannot provide answers to basic introductory questions, be friendly, possess actual massage skills, and be reasonably priced then we will not book you. I know most of these guys are hot, and once they attach to your smaller heads brain it's like a nuclear missile locked on target. Is rolling the dice on such high stakes worth becoming the new normal? Some of these guys treat sessions like an annoying stranger chasing them around a bar asking to buy them a drink, and completely evade providing something that even resembles a relaxing and sensual experience. Most of us have very full, happy, and rewarding lives that include splurging on physical pleasures when we want to. We are not desperate. There is a reason we have different apps for massage and full service providers. We have been bad stewards of these separate spaces and muddied the waters by demanding more for less and creating a fully integrated market between both. If you are looking for full services from masseur apps you are cheating the rest of us by hyperinflating the cost of great massages. Stop looking for Tiffany diamonds in WalMart and be willing to pay for what you really want. I know and still frequent amazing providers in NYC, LA, Miami, Texas, Atlanta, Philly, DC, and Chicago who give more than a reasonable experience and have healthy numbers of clients, who have stayed in the 150-200 range for years. 

This new era of mostly traveling providers is cementing the definition of a quick cash grab w/o real talent, or care for repeat calls. I know that game has been around for ages however the scales seem to be tipping more in the direction of expectation instead of occasional occurrences. There are still amazing masseurs spanning from therapeutic to sensual at fairly reasonable prices. Let's take care of them. We have allowed the art of massage and eroticism to be turned into an expensive lap dance that continues to leave us only wanting, not raving. Keep that trick in its proper back room, and leave those of us satisfied by massage and sensual touch to our mid level tier of affordable pleasures. Are the rich truly removing everything from the middle class....even a good ole fashioned well navigated rub and tug? When did the nuance and playful negotiation of massage w/extras go in favor of transactional day trades in "pay4 just for showing up"? I blame the apps! 🤣

Edited Friday at 02:56 PM by TantricMD