Clients & Emotions

[guptasa1]

Hey all,

 

This is mainly a curious question (not prompted by anything in particular), and I'm sure it's also one that varies from escort to escort pretty widely, but I was wondering how escorts view clients who are a little bit on the emotional side of things?

 

Now I'm NOT talking severe and dangerous issues or anything (stalkers, anger, rudeness, etc.), but I'm more talking about clients who like to open up to the escort and really talk to them and become vulnerable, especially for longer appointments. I'm also talking about clients who might express a great deal of genuine gratefulness or even shed a few happy tears, etc., in an intense session.

 

As an escort, how do you view/handle it? Do you enjoy it and take it as a compliment that someone trusts you to open up to you and be somewhat vulnerable, or does it make you uncomfortable? Or somewhere in between?

 

Thanks.

[guptasa1]

Hey all,

 

This is mainly a curious question (not prompted by anything in particular), and I'm sure it's also one that varies from escort to escort pretty widely, but I was wondering how escorts view clients who are a little bit on the emotional side of things?

 

Now I'm NOT talking severe and dangerous issues or anything (stalkers, anger, rudeness, etc.), but I'm more talking about clients who like to open up to the escort and really talk to them and become vulnerable, especially for longer appointments. I'm also talking about clients who might express a great deal of genuine gratefulness or even shed a few happy tears, etc., in an intense session.

 

As an escort, how do you view/handle it? Do you enjoy it and take it as a compliment that someone trusts you to open up to you and be somewhat vulnerable, or does it make you uncomfortable? Or somewhere in between?

 

Thanks.

[seaboy4hire]

I think that it is great when clients feel comfortable enough to open up to me. I don't look at this as a weakness by any means. Seeing that someone feels comfortable enough to open up allows me and shows me that it is ok to share my own thoughts and such. It allows that much more of a memorable time for myself and hopefully for the other person.

 

Hugs,

Greg

Greg Seattle Wa seaboy4hire@yahoo.com

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/gregseattle.html http://briefcase.yahoo.com/seaboy4hire

[seaboy4hire]

I think that it is great when clients feel comfortable enough to open up to me. I don't look at this as a weakness by any means. Seeing that someone feels comfortable enough to open up allows me and shows me that it is ok to share my own thoughts and such. It allows that much more of a memorable time for myself and hopefully for the other person.

 

Hugs,

Greg

Greg Seattle Wa seaboy4hire@yahoo.com

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/gregseattle.html http://briefcase.yahoo.com/seaboy4hire

[+ Charlie]

I'm sure the answers you get to this question will depend entirely on the personality of the individual escort. Most of the escorts who participate here tend to be socially interactive, and many seem to see sex work as one of the healing professions. Since sexual intimacy often prompts people to become emotionally responsive (not only the client but also the escort), it is likely that escorts often find themselves in situations where the clients expose their minds as well as their bodies. Although that situation comes with the territory, I don't think it is really fair for a client to expect an escort to provide counseling services as well as sex, but I think it is admirably humane if the escort is willing to do so when it is appropriate.

[guptasa1]

Interesting responses - thanks all. =o) (More of course certainly welcome.)

 

I think it probably depends on the escort too. I've noticed, at least in my limited experiences, most of the escorts I've met I can separate into two categories. (And I don't mean to get into stereotypes here - I'm just thinking aloud here based on what I've noticed.) There are escorts who are really engaging and actually seem to care about the people they're with...and getting to know them (or at least seem to, but it's always seemed genuine to me), and there are those who see the client as a source of income and not much more (those who perform but that's as far as it goes...they really don't care about who you are or why you want to spend time with them).

 

I'm not saying there's anything wrong with either one of these extremes (some people prefer getting off with a person and nothing more), but I definitely prefer the former. The latter just makes me uncomfortable and is way too clinical. It just feels...forced.

 

I can be a pretty emotional person (I can also guard it when I know I need to), and I really prefer the former because I feel I can be more open and make myself more vulnerable and trust that person, especially if I see someone more than once. I basically base it on my gut feeling about the person I'm with - if I don't think they're really interested, I guard myself more. Again, no specific event prompted this - I just thought I'd see how some escorts on here see it when a client does open up. I'm glad to know that some escorts actually like it and aren't uncomfortable, because that is the vibe I've gotten with certain escorts, so I think it's likely accurate.

 

Anyhow, thanks again for the responses, folks, and any others would be appreciated too. =o)

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

For me, it's like this:

 

Since i don't see a large number of guys to begin with, one thing that i appreciate more than anything is gaining trust. It's the basis for any friendship & ultimately the thing that determines how that relationship with someone will function & grow.

 

While the sole basis of escorting might be down & dirty fun in the bedroom, spending an extended amount of time with someone gives you the chance to really get a good exchange going... and not just in-between the sheets. I'm flattered when one of my guys trusts me enough to share something personal or ask me advice on a problem that's bothering them. It's an awesome feeling getting to know someone, but an even better feeling when you know you've gotten to that 100% comfort-factor with a person and can just talk... good or bad, but always honestly.

 

Sex is still tops with me, but really appreciating the guy i'm with is also right up there. It shouldn't ever be an 'act.' Honestly, some guys just need an ear to listen and it doesn't take that much to simply look someone in the eye and try to understand. Escorts who lack interest or any real personality don't rate too high in my book.

 

This might be just a business to some guys, but at the base of it, it's still human-to-human interaction. A little compassion and respect isn't that hard to muster. At the base of it all, it's not that much unlike the Golden Rule. Added, HB was quite correct in once posting that karma is a very real thing...

 

 

Warmest Always,

 

 

 

Benjamin Nicholas

[guptasa1]

Thanks again for the reply. I agree wholeheartedly. I wouldn't choose to see an escort who didn't seem like he wanted to know me as a person or treat me right (and of course vice-versa), and I really prefer escorts I can open up to at least a little bit (and who feel free to open up to me too). I just wasn't sure if that was asking to much (even though it's never seemed that way) or making it uncomfortable for that person, and I'm glad to know it's at least often appreciated on both sides. I do very, very much like to trust the person I'm with (and also gain his trust as a client - it certainly goes both ways).

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Rich Creamy Goodness

 

>I'm sure the answers you get to this question will depend

>entirely on the personality of the individual escort.

 

Some of my friends (and it also varies by age) do not enjoy the more extended hire situations; I believe they all (at least the ones I know) want to perform well and definitely do so, but some of them neither want to open up themselves emotionally or be open to others in this manner.

 

 

>many seem to see sex work as one of the

>healing professions. Since sexual intimacy often prompts

>people to become emotionally responsive

 

Were I dating, I would expect a certain "meeting of the minds" - that both of us felt comfortable as well as confident in a progressive intimacy that was both physical and emotional with a growing trust to cultivate and strengthen further intimacy.

 

I also believe that while hot sweaty man to man sex can be very good between two near strangers, it only stands to reason that it should become progressively better with the underpinnings of emotional trust, support and expression that comes from knowledge of one another.

 

>Although that situation comes with

>the territory, I don't think it is really fair for a client to

>expect an escort to provide counseling services as well as

>sex, but I think it is admirably humane if the escort is

>willing to do so when it is appropriate.

 

It is an example that has been used before, but bartenders are neither social workers nor therapist, yet some find themselves in this role. Obviously, some bartenders never find themselves in this situation as their bars are too popular, they are too busy doing what most view as the primary duty in their job description, or their supervisor or employer may simply forbid what he or it may consider non-work related behavior. Where the individual personality of the bartender comes into play also is among those who might do a very good job of not only remembering a drink order, but also providing sufficient attention and ambiance in even the most crowded of establishments, as well as those who, whether the establishment is empty or full, make you, the patron, feel as if you are the only person in the room with them. These are all skills beyond merely mixing a drink.

[ncc1701d]

I agree with all that has been said, and thanks to Benjamin's great attitude during our encounter (Thanks Ben ), I was encouraged enough to go and hire others, and have found a great one indeed who definitely cares beyond the bedroom. However, I would just add that you have to be careful once emotions are involved about the boundaries of the relationship so as not to have unrealistic expectations for a "business arrangement", unless both parties agree to go beyond "business". :-)

[guptasa1]

More great responses and an interesting discussion. I agree that escorting needs to be kept in perspective with boundaries, and I'm mainly talking about time spent together - not afterwards, etc. (though following up is always a very nice touch too).

 

As to the bartender analogy, I think that's a very good one actually. Some people like to just get in and get a drink and don't care who's serving or how. Others have other needs when they get a drink and want someone to talk to, etc.. And fortunately, there are bartenders who cater to both type of customers (and some can do both).

 

I'll always prefer an escort who'll try to get to know me, listen to me, and make me feel safe, welcome, trusted, and even loved (not in a romantic sense as much as in a human sense) for a time.