Lingering questions newbie hiring

[final_impact]

Hi guys,

 

I'm new to the forum thinking about hiring for the first time. I've been reading some of the threads with advice for first timers, which have been super helpful, but I still have a couple lingering questions. I would really appreciate any help (and apologies in advance if my questions are super basic).

• There's a lot of advice on protecting one's privacy, so do clients generally use their real name when contacting escorts? Is it okay to use a different name?
  
• Is it better to have the first session at the client's own place, the escort's, or something like a hotel room?
  
• Do clients tip in addition to the rate? Is that a thing?
  
• Anything else I must know?
  

Thanks in advance!

[+ JEC]

My advice:

- establish a false name, NEVER give your real name

- establish an email account based on that name used solely for this hobby

- establish a google voice account to get a false phone number for txting used solely for this hobby

- some only use encrypted chat (whatsapp is one), that's your call

- meet in a neutral location, NEVER your home. Escorts place is OK if they are well reviewed.

- tips are nice but not required. if you got the service, pay the rate. Tip if the experience was exceptional.

- Never send pictures that can be "google image searched" to locate your facebook or instagram account (in other words, if you do send s pic it should be one you have not posted elsewhere)

 

Pay attention to reviews and your "inner voice" when you interact with the provider.

 

Good luck!

 

Jack

[+ WilliamM]

My advice:

- establish a false name, NEVER give your real name

- establish an email account based on that name used solely for this hobby

- establish a google voice account to get a false phone number for txting used solely for this hobby

- some only use encrypted chat (whatsapp is one), that's your call

- meet in a neutral location, NEVER your home. Escorts place is OK if they are well reviewed.

- tips are nice but not required. if you got the service, pay the rate. Tip if the experience was exceptional.

- Never send pictures that can be "google image searched" to locate your facebook or instagram account (in other words, if you do send s pic it should be one you have not posted elsewhere)

 

Pay attention to reviews and your "inner voice" when you interact with the provider.

 

Good luck!

 

Jack

 

Fine for one hire, but very awkward for many subsequent hires with the same provider.

[+ ArVaGuy]

Hi guys,

 

I'm new to the forum thinking about hiring for the first time. I've been reading some of the threads with advice for first timers, which have been super helpful, but I still have a couple lingering questions. I would really appreciate any help (and apologies in advance if my questions are super basic).

• There's a lot of advice on protecting one's privacy, so do clients generally use their real name when contacting escorts? Is it okay to use a different name?
  
• Is it better to have the first session at the client's own place, the escort's, or something like a hotel room?
  
• Do clients tip in addition to the rate? Is that a thing?
  
• Anything else I must know?
  

Thanks in advance!

 

 

Welcome to the Forum @final_impact .

 

I use my real first name and some trusted escorts know my last name as well. A few escorts who I’ve seen regularly over the years have dropped the pretense and shared real names and such with me. This is a trust level built up over years.

 

If you want to establish a different identity for hiring then do so for your comfort level. Not making light of the privacy issue but some clients do take to the extreme with burner phones, google voice, and all the masking apps. From my point of view, if one is that paranoid about identity issues then perhaps this hobby is not a good idea.

 

I do not recommend seeing guys at your own home. Better to see a guy at his hotel or one that you have arranged yourself. Situations can arise and the last thing you need is for your home to no longer be a safe haven.

 

I don’t tip unless the guy works for an agency. I will cover transportation costs either hotel parking, taxi, or Uber for guys coming to my hotel. I always tell the guy I’ll cover these costs while making arrangements. Usually this is not more than additional $50 expense.

 

Relax and enjoy yourself.

Edited September 4, 2019 by ArVaGuy

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

The use of an alternate name is perfectly OK. While I use "Sam" as both my forum persona and my email address, I often forget about "Sam" when I introduce myself in person and use my real name. It took me a while, but I've learned to answer to "Sam" when in person.

[DallasClient]

I've only been doing this for a few years so maybe I've been lucky. I prefer to host at my home. I'm more comfortable here and out of probably 200, I've only sent away 3 or 4 and even then with $100 for their trouble.

 

I use my real name as well.

 

I won't say that it's the safest choice but it's what I choose to do.

 

My neighbors "know" that I "tutor" a lot of college students by the hour.

Edited September 4, 2019 by DallasClient

[rvwnsd]

Welcome, @final_impact. Here are my thoughts:

 

Hi guys,

 

I'm new to the forum thinking about hiring for the first time. I've been reading some of the threads with advice for first timers, which have been super helpful, but I still have a couple lingering questions. I would really appreciate any help (and apologies in advance if my questions are super basic).

• There's a lot of advice on protecting one's privacy, so do clients generally use their real name when contacting escorts?
  

I use my real first name. I also use my cell phone number, although I am transitioning to a Google Voice number, mainly because after switching from an Apple MacBook Pro to an HP laptop I can't get texts on my laptop.

Is it okay to use a different name?

You need to do whatever makes you comfortable. In the past I used a fake name, but I'd usually slip up and use my actual first name at some point. It is just easier to use my actual name.

Is it better to have the first session at the client's own place, the escort's, or something like a hotel room?

My very first hire was at my place. This was pre-Internet and I had absolutely no problems. Since then, I've hosted guys at my home, visited them in their homes, hosted at my own hotel room, and visited them at their hotel room. Again, you have to do what feels comfortable to you.

Do clients tip in addition to the rate? Is that a thing?

Some clients do, others don't. I typically do not tip, although I have bought small gifts for guys, such as some body products a guy liked and a gift card to a guy's favorite store. Both times were after a stellar session. Both were extremely grateful. One escort I hired fairly frequently once told me that at $250/hour he does not think tipping is appropriate because the rate is already high.

Anything else I must know?

A couple of things are important, IMO:

• Be clear with an escort about what you want. I usually say something like "Hey, [insert name of escort here] your ad caught my eye and I wanted to see if we are compatible. I'm into [describe what I like]. How does this sound to you? rvwnsd"
  
• Be clear with yourself about your own personal limits. If there is something you don't want to engage in, don't let yourself get pressured into doing so. This includes PNP, bareback sex, dirty talk, BDSM, breath control, and rough play.
  
• Be comfortable with walking away. If an escort says or does something that raises a red flag with you, walk away. It is OK.
  
• Do not pre-pay. 'nuff said.
  
• Use the Forum as a resource. If there's an escort who interests you, search for them or ask about them here on the Forum.
  
• Use your own judgement. If you get a "funny feeling," politely decline to continue contact.
  

Edited September 5, 2019 by rvwnsd

[DallasClient]

• Be clear with yourself about your own personal limits. If there is something you don't want to engage in, don't let yourself get pressured into doing so. This includes PNP, bareback sex, dirty talk, BDSM, breath control, and rough play.
  

 

And if you DO want to engage in those sorts of things, be sure to spell those out to your escort in advance. No one likes surprises in this business.

 

Ditto to everything else he and others mentioned. Great advice on these forums.

[Epigonos]

I have been hiring escorts now for seventeen years. I have always believed, and I still believe, that if my life or career would be destroyed if the fact that I hire escorts became generally known then I should NOT be hiring them. There is NO absolutely full proof way that a client can guarantee that he can't or won't be outed. I always prefer to meet ecorts at my place where I can cook a meal and the escort and I can spend approximately three hours together. I use my personal cell phone and my personal desk top to communicate with all the guys I hire. Additionally all the escorts I hire know my full real name. Over the last seventeen years I have hire dozens, if not hundreds, of escorts and I have NOT once had a problem with the escort knowing any of my above personal information. Lucky you say - NOT AT ALL. I have always carefully researched the guy I hire on this site and I only hire well reviewed and known escorts.

[+ keroscenefire]

While always good to be on the side of privacy, using this forum and Daddy Reviews is a good resource to know which escorts are going to be legit professionals before contacting them. That actually is my number one rule, especially as I was starting this hobby. I know that Mike Gaite, James Stevens, and Benjamin Nicholas, etc. are great guys who keep their clients privacy a top priority. In general, these guys travel quite a lot and host in their own hotel rooms, which is a great way to see any escort especially when you are starting out. There are likely 3-4 (or often more in larger cities) in most cities with several stellar Daddy Reviews that provide a good place to start looking.

 

Though of course once you get into it a bit and you see a hot guy that doesn't have as many reviews, go ahead and contact him. Just maybe be a bit more cautious with your privacy and use things like Google Voice, What's App, etc. If you decide you want to start to host, just be a bit careful and put away your computer and phone (or put up a strong password), hide you bills in your name, etc.

 

Now I have several "regulars" who I know their real names and they know mine. We can keep it pretty casual and in some ways have become friends beyond the client-escort relationship. Though of course remember that even when get to that point with an escort, you must keep it professional. Never do anything to invade their privacy and don't ask or expect any discounts or extra perks, though sometimes they may be offered. It's also actually with my regulars that I often do tip, especially those that allow longer times at lower cost or give me special scheduling considerations.

 

Just have fun with it. It's a great hobby and as long as you're smart, it's fairly low risk as well.

[Merboy]

Agree with what everybody has said... come to the forum, talk to people- they are friendly and remember there's no shame in seeking companionship services but you do want to be safe.

[DMICS]

Hi guys,

 

I'm new to the forum thinking about hiring for the first time. I've been reading some of the threads with advice for first timers, which have been super helpful, but I still have a couple lingering questions. I would really appreciate any help (and apologies in advance if my questions are super basic).

• There's a lot of advice on protecting one's privacy, so do clients generally use their real name when contacting escorts? Is it okay to use a different name?
  
• Is it better to have the first session at the client's own place, the escort's, or something like a hotel room?
  
• Do clients tip in addition to the rate? Is that a thing?
  
• Anything else I must know?
  

Thanks in advance!

 

- I have an alias/nickname that I go by so I use that. A few times the companion I booked felt so comfortable with me they just told me to start calling them by their real name.

- I'd say hotel is probably the best, for my 1st hire 3 years ago I hosted at my place. In general all of my bookings i host, I just don't feel comfortable in someone else's place.

- If it was a mind blowing experience I'll tip

 

Everyone else is this thread pretty much broke everything down in detail with great tips. Use this forum as a tool to help and NEVER pay 1st/before the session begins.

[LookingAround]

My advice:

- establish a false name, NEVER give your real name

- establish an email account based on that name used solely for this hobby

- establish a google voice account to get a false phone number for txting used solely for this hobby

- some only use encrypted chat (whatsapp is one), that's your call

- meet in a neutral location, NEVER your home. Escorts place is OK if they are well reviewed.

- tips are nice but not required. if you got the service, pay the rate. Tip if the experience was exceptional.

- Never send pictures that can be "google image searched" to locate your facebook or instagram account (in other words, if you do send s pic it should be one you have not posted elsewhere)

 

Pay attention to reviews and your "inner voice" when you interact with the provider.

 

Good luck!

 

Jack

In decades of hiring I’ve not followed a single one of these suggestions and I’ve had wonderful times with never a problem.

[+ JEC]

In decades of hiring I’ve not followed a single one of these suggestions and I’ve had wonderful times with never a problem.

Each of need to do what makes us feel comfortable, based on our risk tolorance and what we feel is at stake. @final_impact these are all suggestions, do what you feel most comfortable with!

[RyanDean]

As you can see, there are a lot of varied opinions about everything here, so -- to echo what's already been said -- proceed in the way that feels most right for you. (For example, I use a nickname and a burner app and I like to tip. Works for me!)

 

That said, I would offer three main "rules" that I can't imagine proceeding without.

• Be respectful. Of yourself and of your gent. Goes a long way. Such a long way.
  
• Be clear. In your communications and in your head/heart. Things can get confused quickly in this hobby. So be clear in your communications with your gent and be clear with yourself about what a hiring relationship is.
  
• Trust your gut. I've been very fortunate to not have anything bad happen and I attribute a lot of that to trusting what others have called one's "inner voice". And I can confirm that my least positive experiences have come when I've been stubborn and not trusted the many cues telling me that meeting up with a particular gent might not be what I hoped it to be.
  

Finally, using this forum thoughtfully can provide an incredible support -- both in terms of community and in terms of information. I am not sure when/whether I would have taken the initial hiring plunge without the guidance of folks here (marked my 4th anniversary just this summer) but I do know I would not have felt as "clear" about how the hobby fits in my life without the perspective I continue to gain from the folks here.

Edited September 4, 2019 by RyanDean

[final_impact]

Wow thanks so much everybody for taking the time to help me! I was not expecting to get this many responses but everybody has been so helpful and welcoming. I will think about everything that you all have said and take them into consideration if/when I decide to hire (I'm often not good with choices so it might take a while lol). Thanks again everyone!