Can someone tell me what's going on ?

[OceanTraveller]

I need to ask some help in finding out what is going on if anything here. I will tell what is happening and would like those who are much more savvy than I to enlighten me please . First I am from a smaller town in the South . I am in my 50's and have never gone out or had many frends that are gay . I have been involved in civic affairs so I use escorts when I need to have some companionship etc . I also have been on some Gay Group cruises which I like hence the name OceanTraveller. Cruising is my most favorite past time .

I was at my local health club at 6:00 a.m. about 3 weeks ago and I was on the treadmill . I was facing north and a guy in his 30's comes up and gets on the one in front which is facing east . I am looking at his side as he is exercising. I thought that he was very attractive and I guess I got carried away looking at him and his ass etc. I had all kinds of thoughts going through my head . I finished my workout and did my ab training and went back to my locker to change and go to the Jacuzzi . I had been there maybe a minute and as I was putting up my clothes I raised up to meet his eyes and he grinned from ear to ear . I just kept on putting my clothes up as if I was too busy. I was a little frightened . I realized at that point that there was a mirror on the wall opposite him that he must have seen me looking at him and I was extremely embarrased. I thought he might be angry . I have been trying to avoid him for 3 weeks and still end up finishing at about the same time , but I did not speak or look at him.

Well today I finished a little early and there he was back there and said " Did you have good workout ? " I replied that I did and he started talking and found out that I am going with my family to Vegas fore Christmas > He asked if I was taking my wife and I said no that I am still single but going with the parents and brother and nephew. He told me he envied me and also that his wife wanted to go to the Bahamas but he would like to go to Vegas he said that it was an adult playground etc. We walked out with another member together and at least I was relieved that he wasn't mad and I don't have to dread going there again .

Sorry this is so long but what is up with this ? I must have really checked him out since I did not know that he could see me and he must know that I was somewhat lustful. He's married and he must be straight . Do you think he got a kick out of being admired or something . Anyone have a clue as to what is up here ?:-)

 

Oh I heard him say that he has a little girl .

And one more thing ... he undresses of course to shower and wraps a towel but coming back he tries to slip on his boxers under the towel some so as not to be fully unclothed . I don't really look at him I don't think .

[+ purplekow]

Try asking him. Married does not equal straight but even if this man is straight, he seems friendly and talkative. Even if you don't want to come out to this man, you could tell him the truth or at least part of the truth. Sometimes when you are working out if you a see a man whose body is fit you sometimes worry that you are staring too hard. In fact, the first day you saw him you were embarrassed in thinking that perhaps you had stared too hard at him. You could then say you are glad that was not the case because in addition to have a fit body he seems like a nice guy. The tone of his answer should tell you what you want to know.

 

Being less circumspect, next time you are working out together ask him if he is going to the jacuzzi. Then try putting your foot in his lap when you are together in the pool.

[OceanTraveller]

We've never been in the Jacuzzi together . This is at 5:30a.m. and we are both on our way to work . I am not in it long myself. I thought it strange that he would ask if I were taking my wife on my Christmas trip( who would leave the wife at home at Christmas ? )

Thanks PurpleKow !:-)

[+ purplekow]

>We've never been in the Jacuzzi together . This is at

>5:30a.m. and we are both on our way to work . I am not in it

>long myself. I thought it strange that he would ask if I were

>taking my wife on my Christmas trip( who would leave the wife

>at home at Christmas ? )

>Thanks PurpleKow !:-)

 

 

One way to find out if you are married is to ask if your wife is going with you. Hey this guy could be on the down low or he could be new to town and looking to meet some new people. The more upfront you are the easier it will be to decide. But failing complete honesty, some subtle probing can't hurt, and might be some fun.

[+ deej]

I think you have butterflies in your stomach caused by a hot guy. Who among us hasn't had THAT happen?

 

Chat him up over time. Get to know him. Nothing does away with butterflies like familiarity. He's clearly open to an occasional chat, but he may be just exactly that. He may be a friendly guy saying hello to someone he sees in the gym all the time.

 

You go early in the morning. Ask him where he works that gets him to the gym so early. He mentioned a daughter. It's the perfect time of year to ask him about seeing Christmas through his daughter's eyes. Talk about the weather. Whatever.

 

Only with familiarity will you vanquish the butterflies and see for yourself what's going on.

 

You may only end up with a great friend (which isn't a bad ending).

[OceanTraveller]

Thanks for the replies . Small town life is different . I may go for years without socializing with someone who is in the lifestyle and being in business I have to be careful. I always have a great time on the cruises and with my easy going nature I have even been asked to escort a trip when they need extra help but I declined as that's too much work !! I will reportback on this !:-)

Thanks !!!! Hugs !!

Ocean

[+ Charlie]

The only person who can tell you what is going on is the guy himself. He's obviously sociable and open to some level of conversation about his personal life. He seems to enjoy showing off his body and having it noticed, but is uncomfortable about showing his cock; he may feel it is too small (is the body-building a compensation for that?), or he may not want to be perceived as too open to homosexual interest, or maybe he even is hiding a hard-on. I think the advice about slowly building up an acquaintance through less loaded conversational subjects is the best way to eventually find out where he is coming from.

[edjames]

Most of the replies to your post have been right on the money. This sounds like a friendly guy at the gym who may just want some conversation, and is perhaps looking for someone to spot him on the weights. Since he hasn't been overt in his flirtations (i.e.. he hasn't been waggin his slong in front of you, or jumping into the steam room for a quickie), I would backoff on the gay assumption and just continue the friendly conversation. Remember, if you're wrong about this, he may decide to file a complaint and you'd be up the threadmill without a gym, so don't jump to conclusions. Relax, if something is to happen, let it happen on his timetable. When he asks you out for a cocktail, then, maybe...

 

E-

[Guest alanm]

Exactly. Talk to him more.

 

I live in a very straight neighborhood and work out at a gym where it's assumed that people are heterosexual. A good looking grad student started to talk to me about travel two months ago. The following week, it seemed every time I walked into the shower room the grad student was just coming out of the steam room naked. I didn't plan it, neither did he. In fact, he would just pick up the latest conversation where we had left off. I am used to an entirely different gay atmospheres in gyms.

 

The guy was just looking for a friend to talk with while he worked out.

I wish my new 'friend' was gay, but meeting a new interesting person is

pleasant also.

 

If that's all this is for the OP, it's far from the end of the world. But you have to follow up every possible chance for conversation to find out.

[Louis]

I too live in a small town. Just chat with him and get to know him. Maybe he's gay, maybe he isn't....and really what does it matter....you have gained a friend.

Louis

[OceanTraveller]

Yes it is sometimes hard to make friends there too !! Thank You all for such sage advice and I feel a lot better now !!! Thank You !!:-)

[Guest Merlin]

Do not assume that he knows what is going on in your mind. You have guessed that he realized that you were admiring him, but it is not necessarily so. If you would like something to come of this, I would suggest you ask him if he would like to have coffee, or a coke, or lunch. But being closeted in a small town you first need to decide if you want anything to develop.

[Rick Munroe]

>He mentioned a daughter. It's the

>perfect time of year to ask him about seeing Christmas through

>his daughter's eyes.

 

I admit I do skim sometimes, but I just cannot find the part where OT said the guy was legally blind.