Kevin Slater

Two (three?) words: FileMaker Pro. Kevin Slater

Neither does Kevin Slater. Kevin Slater

You really need to ask the escort in question. All else is just postulating. Kevin Slater

Tupperware games. Kevin Slater

I've always been impressed with one hooker buddy of mine who always texts the client very quickly after the session saying something like "it was great meeting you" or the like. Come to realize that is more for his record keeping (the text thread will reflect that the guy actually showed up and the appointment went well) than for marketing. Kevin Slater

What’s the difference between a well-dressed man riding a tricycle and a poorly-dressed man riding a bicycle? Attire. Kevin Slater

How would you feel if he had another client over when you finished bathing? You're consuming his time whether you're in the shower or on the table. Kevin Slater

Wait, you had the latitude to come up with any great idea at all to make your point, and the best you could do is a flying belt? Kevin Slater

So you're telling me I gotta eat two to hit my targets? Kevin Slater

Seems that an STI in the top would be IDd pre-dip (and presumably pre-drip), one in the bottom would be diagnosed post-dip. Kevin Slater

I've been hired by a few escorts. My few experiences on the other side of the equation are too tawdry to invoke the term escort. Kevin Slater

Yeah, that never struck me as quite fair. Fees are usually directly correlated to square footage, but I'm not sure smaller units receive fewer packages, use the elevator less, etc. I'm a beneficiary of this as all my units tends to be small vis-a-vis their buildings, but if I were to design the system, there'd be a flat base charge for all units and then a second component based on square footage. Maybe my argument works better in a condo (which all mine are), because it's an easy rebuttal that a co-op is simply charging $x per share. Kevin Slater

The underlying mortgage on the building (if the co-op has one, which most do), not on your individual unit. Kevin Slater

I think it's an error in the listing. The same apartment shows on streeteasy without mentioning the property taxes, which would be appropriate as those are part of your HOA fee in a NYC co-op. So to answer your question, I suspect the $4k covers property taxes, staff, underlying mortgage, utilities, upkeep, etc. That doesn't strike me as high on a $3M apartment. Kevin Slater

Definitely not hamster porn. Ewww. Kevin Slater

Lifetime revenue by day of the week: http://laterslater.com/Days.png Kevin Slater

Yeah, as their sexual fantasies play out over texts and emails, their fantasy budget seems to grow correspondingly. Kevin Slater

The likelihood of a booking coming to fruition is inversely proportional to the amount of texts, calls and emails beforehand. Kevin Slater

One is further east than the other. Kevin Slater

I think the way to ask that question is "How much would it be for you to come to my hotel (the Marriott at 314 Main Street) for two hours tomorrow starting at 2pm?". Then he has all the info to provide a more accurate quote. Kevin Slater

It's also a capital M. Yeah, really dumb. Kevin Slater

24A "Off with her head" and 47A "Capital offense" sort of explain this dumb "depicted literally" joke. Kevin Slater

I would hope not. But you could always subscribe to HBO Now for $15 a month. Kevin Slater

Barbie's conjoined boyfriends. Kevin Slater

Thursday are usually fun, as they often involve themes or gimmicks. Saturdays are the hardest, Sundays are probably a Thursday level of difficulty only larger. Here's a useful guide of general tips for solving NYT crosswords. I tend to do them daily, so feel free to reach out if you wish. Kevin Slater