Another 20-something chiming in:
First and foremost, as gender is a spectrum, so must sexuality be.
Sexuality is fluid.
Sexual attraction can stem from one's appearance, body parts, behavior, identity, or even such arbitrary things as one's occupation (firefighters, anybody?)
What turns you on is based on your life experiences and interactions, so as you have more experiences -- your potential for arousal changes.
What we as a society view as "sexual" is socially constructed - it can very much change across cultures and time periods.
It's sexual because we decided it is - think of all the sexual activities that one can do that don't involve penetration or even orgasm
(especially when one dives into the Fetish/BDSM/Kink world.)
As @LivingnLA referenced, the attraction to straightness stems from our society's stranglehold on / relationship with masculinity.
In reference to men who have sex with men, they are seen as the golden calf because they are theoretically unobtainable and represent the desired male role from mainstream society's standpoint --- what men who identify as gay are often ostracized for not being.
The fetishization of straightness has at its core internalized homophobia.
My favorite intimate interactions have been with those who explore beyond strict labeling when it comes to intimacy.
My Labels
- Queer
- Homoflexible/Pansexual with a preference