Juan Vancouver

Negative comments about our looks?
 
Really?
 
I am by no means the most beautiful man in the world, I am in the high thirties, have tons of flaws and if that were not enough, I am not white. To this day, I can't remember a single client making a negative comment about me to my face.
 
People treat you the way you treat them. Give them kindness, warmth and respect and that is what you will receive from them... also, as a few disgruntled forum members can attest to, I don't meet assholes.
 
"What do you mean you won't see me? Shut up and put me on your schedule, you'll get your money!" (Nope).
 
On the other hand, I am incredibly aware of the fact that I am not (and don't want to be) everyone's cup of tea. I am a cup of tea, I am not the ocean. I am a single cup of tea and can only be drank by one (or seven) people at a time. I don't need to appeal to everyone, I only need to appeal to those few who will drink me today.
 
Escorting should never be a source of pleasure, companionship and reassurance for escorts. This is our job, we are not here for the perks, we are here to do our job well, and at most, get professional satisfaction. The minute an escort tackles the profession looking for compliments he is fucked. He will constantly be wanting for something from his clients and will put himself in very uncomfortable situations that will never give him his desired ego boost.
 

 
I think you are making a very common mistake that has most of us in pickle. You are conflating self esteem and self esteem issues with the amount of attention and reassurance we get from others. Those are two entirely different and grossly unrelated things that go in opposite directions.
 
Self esteem and self esteem issues are about how I think about myself. Me. About myself. The way others perceive you have absolutely no effect on your self esteem. If other people's judgments happen to match your self assessment, then they will appear to be related, but there is no causation in this correlation.
 
Reassurance, attention, desire, criticism are all going from the outside to the inside. Often when people's self esteems are not entirely healthy, this external input might have the ability to damage it over time, however, when self esteem is being cultivated and is healthy, no amount of praise or criticism will change the way you think about yourself.
 
If an man starts escorting because external reassurance is important for him, he is in for a harsh awakening. This happens often and tends to be really damaging because they soon enough discover that not everyone wants them and they are not the universal appeal jewel they wished they were.
 
If a man starts escorting with a healthy self esteem and not really interested in receiving reassurance, he will discover this is a fulfilling and fun profession when he can help others cultivate that sense of confidence he himself enjoys. While he will not appeal to everyone, he will be happy knowing that he will appeal to enough people to keep him busy.
 
Also, if someone is that much of an asshole that he thinks he is entitled to be a dick, that immediately robs his opinion of every bit of validity.
 
Life is too damned short.

Negative comments about our looks?
 
Really?
 
I am by no means the most beautiful man in the world, I am in the high thirties, have tons of flaws and if that were not enough, I am not white. To this day, I can't remember a single client making a negative comment about me to my face.
 
People treat you the way you treat them. Give them kindness, warmth and respect and that is what you will receive from them... also, as a few disgruntled forum members can attest to, I don't meet assholes.
 
"What do you mean you won't see me? Shut up and put me on your schedule, you'll get your money!" (Nope).
 
On the other hand, I am incredibly aware of the fact that I am not (and don't want to be) everyone's cup of tea. I am a cup of tea, I am not the ocean. I am a single cup of tea and can only be drank by one (or seven) people at a time. I don't need to appeal to everyone, I only need to appeal to those few who will drink me today.
 
Escorting should never be a source of pleasure, companionship and reassurance for escorts. This is our job, we are not here for the perks, we are here to do our job well, and at most, get professional satisfaction. The minute an escort tackles the profession looking for compliments he is fucked. He will constantly be wanting for something from his clients and will put himself in very uncomfortable situations that will never give him his desired ego boost.
 

 
I think you are making a very common mistake that has most of us in pickle. You are conflating self esteem and self esteem issues with the amount of attention and reassurance we get from others. Those are two entirely different and grossly unrelated things that go in opposite directions.
 
Self esteem and self esteem issues are about how I think about myself. Me. About myself. The way others perceive you have absolutely no effect on your self esteem. If other people's judgments happen to match your self assessment, then they will appear to be related, but there is no causation in this correlation.
 
Reassurance, attention, desire, criticism are all going from the outside to the inside. Often when people's self esteems are not entirely healthy, this external input might have the ability to damage it over time, however, when self esteem is being cultivated and is healthy, no amount of praise or criticism will change the way you think about yourself.
 
If an man starts escorting because external reassurance is important for him, he is in for a harsh awakening. This happens often and tends to be really damaging because they soon enough discover that not everyone wants them and they are not the universal appeal jewel they wished they were.
 
If a man starts escorting with a healthy self esteem and not really interested in receiving reassurance, he will discover this is a fulfilling and fun profession when he can help others cultivate that sense of confidence he himself enjoys. While he will not appeal to everyone, he will be happy knowing that he will appeal to enough people to keep him busy.
 
Also, if someone is that much of an asshole that he thinks he is entitled to be a dick, that immediately robs his opinion of every bit of validity.
 
Life is too damned short.

Negative comments about our looks?
 
Really?
 
I am by no means the most beautiful man in the world, I am in the high thirties, have tons of flaws and if that were not enough, I am not white. To this day, I can't remember a single client making a negative comment about me to my face.
 
People treat you the way you treat them. Give them kindness, warmth and respect and that is what you will receive from them... also, as a few disgruntled forum members can attest to, I don't meet assholes.
 
"What do you mean you won't see me? Shut up and put me on your schedule, you'll get your money!" (Nope).
 
On the other hand, I am incredibly aware of the fact that I am not (and don't want to be) everyone's cup of tea. I am a cup of tea, I am not the ocean. I am a single cup of tea and can only be drank by one (or seven) people at a time. I don't need to appeal to everyone, I only need to appeal to those few who will drink me today.
 
Escorting should never be a source of pleasure, companionship and reassurance for escorts. This is our job, we are not here for the perks, we are here to do our job well, and at most, get professional satisfaction. The minute an escort tackles the profession looking for compliments he is fucked. He will constantly be wanting for something from his clients and will put himself in very uncomfortable situations that will never give him his desired ego boost.
 

 
I think you are making a very common mistake that has most of us in pickle. You are conflating self esteem and self esteem issues with the amount of attention and reassurance we get from others. Those are two entirely different and grossly unrelated things that go in opposite directions.
 
Self esteem and self esteem issues are about how I think about myself. Me. About myself. The way others perceive you have absolutely no effect on your self esteem. If other people's judgments happen to match your self assessment, then they will appear to be related, but there is no causation in this correlation.
 
Reassurance, attention, desire, criticism are all going from the outside to the inside. Often when people's self esteems are not entirely healthy, this external input might have the ability to damage it over time, however, when self esteem is being cultivated and is healthy, no amount of praise or criticism will change the way you think about yourself.
 
If an man starts escorting because external reassurance is important for him, he is in for a harsh awakening. This happens often and tends to be really damaging because they soon enough discover that not everyone wants them and they are not the universal appeal jewel they wished they were.
 
If a man starts escorting with a healthy self esteem and not really interested in receiving reassurance, he will discover this is a fulfilling and fun profession when he can help others cultivate that sense of confidence he himself enjoys. While he will not appeal to everyone, he will be happy knowing that he will appeal to enough people to keep him busy.
 
Also, if someone is that much of an asshole that he thinks he is entitled to be a dick, that immediately robs his opinion of every bit of validity.
 
Life is too damned short.

Greg,
 
I don't want to make assumptions as how often this happens to you, but would you feel the same if you received 30, 40 different daily requests from "clients" wanting to find their own personal technique to weed out a flake?
 
Would you have that much time in your life?
 
Would you still think it doesn't take too long?
 
I personally think it is a slippery slope. Once you give into a personal whim of someone who in the end is not likely to hire you, you will be hard pressed to say no to every single future request. I much rather build a reputation, carefully maintain my brand and happily deal with those men who are aware of it and are excited to spend time with me.

Not al all, you sound like an intelligent, well-informed, well-meaning man who has thought about this subject more than two minutes and who is not reacting to rape guided by the things your asshole uncle drunkenly barked at dinner.
 
What a bizarre world this is in which an intelligent, healthy opinion might be attacked as a bleeding heart liberal reaction.

min·i·mize
ˈminəˌmīz/
verb
gerund or present participle: minimizing

reduce (something, especially something unwanted or unpleasant) to the smallest possible amount or degree.
"the aim is to minimize costs"
synonyms: keep down, keep at/to a minimum, reduce, decrease, cut down, lessen, curtail, diminish, prune;
informalslash
"the aim is to minimize costs"
represent or estimate at less than the true value or importance.
"they may minimize, or even overlook, the importance of such beliefs"
synonyms: belittle, make light of, play down, underestimate, underrate, downplay, undervalue, underappreciate, understate; More



No, It doesn't sound like you are minimizing it. You ARE. You are literally saying that it is not as bad as she thinks it is.
 

 
Yep.
 

 
Yes, and until we stop trying to tell the victims how to feel and tell them they didn't get it as bad as they think they did, rape will have the masses moral support.
 
By telling a victim he/she should buck up and tone it down, what we are doing is (consciously or subconsciously) supporting the perpetrator.

min·i·mize
ˈminəˌmīz/
verb
gerund or present participle: minimizing

reduce (something, especially something unwanted or unpleasant) to the smallest possible amount or degree.
"the aim is to minimize costs"
synonyms: keep down, keep at/to a minimum, reduce, decrease, cut down, lessen, curtail, diminish, prune;
informalslash
"the aim is to minimize costs"
represent or estimate at less than the true value or importance.
"they may minimize, or even overlook, the importance of such beliefs"
synonyms: belittle, make light of, play down, underestimate, underrate, downplay, undervalue, underappreciate, understate; More



No, It doesn't sound like you are minimizing it. You ARE. You are literally saying that it is not as bad as she thinks it is.
 

 
Yep.
 

 
Yes, and until we stop trying to tell the victims how to feel and tell them they didn't get it as bad as they think they did, rape will have the masses moral support.
 
By telling a victim he/she should buck up and tone it down, what we are doing is (consciously or subconsciously) supporting the perpetrator.

People are so incredibly sexist... it's so gross!
 
“This was not a clear-cut case, and I hope the jury got it right,” commented one man on a local TV station’s coverage of the verdict. “Of course Turner made some terrible mistakes, but I will always wonder if consent happened or not."
 
No douchebag, she was passed out so bad that it took her three hours to come back. She could not have given consent in that state.
 
It is the most clear cut case you will ever see.
 
“So his BAC was 2 times the legal limit, while hers was 3 times,” said another. “There are no winners here, but she is considered a victim while he goes [from] Stanford student and Olympic hopeful to registered sex offender for the rest of his life once he gets out of prison. Fair enough.”
 
Yeah, douchebag, one person was passed out, the other wasn't. He IS a sex offender, I don't give a shit about his sportly feats. I hope he went directly from Stanford Olympic hopeful to jail pass around bitch bottom.
 
And people say that the rape culture is only real in the inflammatory, hysteric minds of the feminist lobby.
 
How sad.

Milk Chocolate Butt
 
http://67.media.tumblr.com/4b90c115012e39b5f5d5574a3e8aff4f/tumblr_nq98nyzRbi1uy1x81o1_500.jpg

Yes, I get how you feel, but there is actually something you can do to steer this crazy boat in the right direction.
 
Click on the link that FTM_TWINK shared and let the judicial system how you feel.
 
It's people being privately outraged at home what keeps this system going.
 
Rage baby! RAGE!

That is my ass... but I beg you... do not treat me more respectfully... DISRESPECT ME! =)

That is my ass... but I beg you... do not treat me more respectfully... DISRESPECT ME! =)

That is my ass... but I beg you... do not treat me more respectfully... DISRESPECT ME! =)

OK, my mind will treat you more respectfully but my tongue will treat your hole disrespectfully.

Fuck, now I am complete. I can die happy.

Re-reading my post I decided that next time this subject comes up I won't hold back... I'll let you guys know exactly how I feel.

If you all would like to ensure Judge Persky, the rape sympathizer who presided this case, never gets to perpetuate rape culture again, this petition has instructions on how to file a complaint about his judicial bias:
https://www.change.org/p/california-state-house-recall-judge-aaron-persky?recruiter=783204

Yes, the full text of her statement is powerful. Brock Allen Turner is a rapist, period. His dad is a tool too because instead of being grateful for the very light sentence, he's complaining about how it's too much for his poor son who can't eat his favorite ribeyes right now. Dan A. Turner is an entitled ungrateful moron in my book.

People are so incredibly sexist... it's so gross!
 
“This was not a clear-cut case, and I hope the jury got it right,” commented one man on a local TV station’s coverage of the verdict. “Of course Turner made some terrible mistakes, but I will always wonder if consent happened or not."
 
No douchebag, she was passed out so bad that it took her three hours to come back. She could not have given consent in that state.
 
It is the most clear cut case you will ever see.
 
“So his BAC was 2 times the legal limit, while hers was 3 times,” said another. “There are no winners here, but she is considered a victim while he goes [from] Stanford student and Olympic hopeful to registered sex offender for the rest of his life once he gets out of prison. Fair enough.”
 
Yeah, douchebag, one person was passed out, the other wasn't. He IS a sex offender, I don't give a shit about his sportly feats. I hope he went directly from Stanford Olympic hopeful to jail pass around bitch bottom.
 
And people say that the rape culture is only real in the inflammatory, hysteric minds of the feminist lobby.
 
How sad.

Re-reading my post I decided that next time this subject comes up I won't hold back... I'll let you guys know exactly how I feel.

Not al all, you sound like an intelligent, well-informed, well-meaning man who has thought about this subject more than two minutes and who is not reacting to rape guided by the things your asshole uncle drunkenly barked at dinner.
 
What a bizarre world this is in which an intelligent, healthy opinion might be attacked as a bleeding heart liberal reaction.

Not al all, you sound like an intelligent, well-informed, well-meaning man who has thought about this subject more than two minutes and who is not reacting to rape guided by the things your asshole uncle drunkenly barked at dinner.
 
What a bizarre world this is in which an intelligent, healthy opinion might be attacked as a bleeding heart liberal reaction.

min·i·mize
ˈminəˌmīz/
verb
gerund or present participle: minimizing

reduce (something, especially something unwanted or unpleasant) to the smallest possible amount or degree.
"the aim is to minimize costs"
synonyms: keep down, keep at/to a minimum, reduce, decrease, cut down, lessen, curtail, diminish, prune;
informalslash
"the aim is to minimize costs"
represent or estimate at less than the true value or importance.
"they may minimize, or even overlook, the importance of such beliefs"
synonyms: belittle, make light of, play down, underestimate, underrate, downplay, undervalue, underappreciate, understate; More



No, It doesn't sound like you are minimizing it. You ARE. You are literally saying that it is not as bad as she thinks it is.
 

 
Yep.
 

 
Yes, and until we stop trying to tell the victims how to feel and tell them they didn't get it as bad as they think they did, rape will have the masses moral support.
 
By telling a victim he/she should buck up and tone it down, what we are doing is (consciously or subconsciously) supporting the perpetrator.

Re-reading my post I decided that next time this subject comes up I won't hold back... I'll let you guys know exactly how I feel.

People are so incredibly sexist... it's so gross!
 
“This was not a clear-cut case, and I hope the jury got it right,” commented one man on a local TV station’s coverage of the verdict. “Of course Turner made some terrible mistakes, but I will always wonder if consent happened or not."
 
No douchebag, she was passed out so bad that it took her three hours to come back. She could not have given consent in that state.
 
It is the most clear cut case you will ever see.
 
“So his BAC was 2 times the legal limit, while hers was 3 times,” said another. “There are no winners here, but she is considered a victim while he goes [from] Stanford student and Olympic hopeful to registered sex offender for the rest of his life once he gets out of prison. Fair enough.”
 
Yeah, douchebag, one person was passed out, the other wasn't. He IS a sex offender, I don't give a shit about his sportly feats. I hope he went directly from Stanford Olympic hopeful to jail pass around bitch bottom.
 
And people say that the rape culture is only real in the inflammatory, hysteric minds of the feminist lobby.
 
How sad.