Drained Empty

I've never seen such enthusiastic support for one provider!
 
He's so lucky to have such an ardent fan.
 
Doesn't seem to busy though as his profile has been toggled "available now" all weekend.
 
Maybe you can have brunch and do some shopping with him and see a movie since he's so free.

There's this video for a yet unlaunched black men site for those of you who like interracial action:
 
https://www.gayforit.eu/video/408578/Oil-Massage-rimming
 
And I can't believe no one has posted the infamous Preston oil massage:
 
https://www.gayforit.eu/video/342922/Preston-Massage

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

I know Wklucas' comment about Spencer was meant to be snarky, but it perfectly illustrates white privilege.
 
He can go "call on" pretty much any provider when he wants to. For myself and certain others, the very first thing I do is ask them "are you okay with clients of my ethnicity."
 
If the reply is no, we spare ourselves an uncomfortable in-person rejection. If the reply is yes, it can still create a dynamic where the patron still feels "less than" because he had to ask in the first place. But in my experience, better to check than get rejected.
 
Must be nice if you don't have to think or deal about such things.
 
Anyway, I digress. If anyone knows tops -- particularly African American ones -- who don't have any racial requirements and are legit (I ask this because a number have been identified on this board as using fake pics), the recommendations would be appreciated.

The problem is that's not what happens.
 
First off, let's remind everyone that these are spas, not sex clubs. I've seen children sometimes at some of the places with their fathers, with what is supposed to be a familial, cultural experience.
 
Places like Wilshire and Century have been completely overrun by guys looking to hook up. Listen, we're all horny. But to have no discretion at all, and even worse, make fun at those who may be there for the spa experience, is disrespectful and selfish. But that's what these alpha white gays do...they think they own everything.
 
I saw an older black gentleman struggle with some of the doors at Century, but no one helped him. Then, a Korean patron went into the steamroom and all the guys made very audible sighs or glares at him until he left.
 
As an Asian person, I have never felt more hostility towards guys of my race than at Korean Spas. That is a real problem.

lsik1476 if you are Asian or black don't bother with Spencer and spare yourself the race hate/humiliation from a racist.

lsik1476 if you are Asian or black don't bother with Spencer and spare yourself the race hate/humiliation from a racist.

Do you reveal your race to your masseurs or escorts when booking?
 
I'm Asian American and admittedly a little neurotic about how my race is perceived in the gay community after years of experiencing tons of negativity.
 
I'm in my 30s and in decent shape, which I don't disclose because I feel that's "acceptable." But I always disclose my background, usually in the form of "I'm Asian, is that okay?" For the record, no one has ever said no, but in hook-up situations (which I know these aren't), I always reveal it right off the bat. I also don't respond to say, a Craigslist ad or Grindr post unless they specifically say "seeking Asians" (I don't even reply to ads that say "open to race").
 
I've just read/experienced instances where guys thought an Asian guy was Caucasian and felt "tricked." I have an equally neurotic fear of rejection (especially based on race) which is why I always disclose.
 
I disclosed to the last masseur while booking, and he asked why I did it and thought it was "weird." But then again I just read a thread here about a local masseur who reportedly doesn't serve Asians. It would be my biggest nightmare if I booked him and he rejected me after opening the door.
 
Maybe I'm just being crazy, but does anyone else do this?

Kenomara, I am sad to hear this happened to you. I have spoken candidly about blanket racial rejection in other threads and facing similar experiences, whether with providers, hook-up apps, and/or at bars or spas.
 
To be rejected for your race is a pain that can't be easily described and sadly one Asians, Indians, and sometimes blacks experience all too often. It is white privilege to both not have to experience it and own the power of rejection.
 
The harsh and all encompassing "nos," i.e. "no Asians," dehumanize. You are no longer a person, you are a category. The even more offensive "no rice or spice" (no Asians or Indians) reduces you to an object. I'm sure there are white patrons that guys like Spencer are not attracted to, but they at least not treated with the indignity of an automatic rejection before an in-person meeting.
 
At least you were spared the pain of being rejected to your face. To travel (I presume) to him with excitement and expectation, only to get "the look" (the same that patrons at bars and spas give, because they can't outright say "get away from me") and the awkward "sorry" followed by a closed door.
 
Eventually, I find I forget those "nos" and "looks." They happen so often. The residual, ongoing hurt comes from knowing you've done nothing wrong except being born what most of gay society deems "undesirable" and not being able to do anything about it. And also it hurts realizing for all the LGBT "progress" that's being touted, there is hate within our own community.
 
I'm going to stop now, because people on this board accuse me of playing "the race card" or having "issues." So thank you for sharing your experience, however painful, and having this discussion. Because being silenced is another type of "no."

There's this video for a yet unlaunched black men site for those of you who like interracial action:
 
https://www.gayforit.eu/video/408578/Oil-Massage-rimming
 
And I can't believe no one has posted the infamous Preston oil massage:
 
https://www.gayforit.eu/video/342922/Preston-Massage

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

I'm going to cautiously enter this thread because I've been race-hated on this board.
 
Racism is undoubtedly present in the gay community. From the blatant "no Asians" to bars or spas clearing out when I enter, I've experienced it my entire adult life. Attraction may by governed physiologically (just how gay men aren't sexually attracted to women) or influenced by society and media (Asian men are regularly emasculated on screen). It may be a bit of both. But from my experience, Asians are treated worse in the gay community than any other race (except perhaps South Asians).
 
The issue comes with how guys express their attraction (or lack of). I'm not sexually attracted to older men, but frequently get attention from them (another topic for another day). If they reach out to me, I reply, "thank you, but it's not a 100% match. Good luck." I don't say "you're too old." I don't block them. Some guys get hostile but most of the time they say "thanks" or "no problem." Respect earns respect.
 
The problem is many white guys (who are considered by most as the most desirable) lack that respect. I stopped complimenting white guys on Grindr because I'd get auto blocked. For saying things like "you have a great smile." Yes, I know there are my Asian brothers that shamelessly hurl themselves at any white guy, but when the level of lack of respect for another race results in an automatic block or a hand to the face (yes, one guy once put his hand in my face after I said he was good-looking), that comes from thinking you're better than they are. And that is definitely racism.
 
The saddest part is so many Asians have internalized it. I'm in SF for the month and can't tell you how many Asian guys exclude their race from their profiles. Why? Because they know a lot of guys check the boxes for other races than Asian. They want to be the exception. Sometimes they are (the tall, muscular Asians with square jaws -- ironically, the desirable Asians look more "white"). Sometimes they're not. This is true of Asian guys with ripped bodies and use shirtless pics. A white guy will find the body hot but when they learn it belongs to an Asian they change their minds. What changed? Maybe the face. Or maybe the race.
 
This recent video puts it best. An asian model (who is straight, but it affects all Asians) says, "I didn't want to be white. I just want to be treated like I was white." What he's really saying is that he wants to be treated with respect.
 

 
So whether it's "preference" or you're racist (because let's face it, some of you are), try treating everyone with respect. Because we're all part of the human race.

Silence is Golden.
 
On an unrelated note, Spencer Whitman, whom Tony Napoli recommended, does not see Asian clients for escorting, and probably will be miserable massaging a person of that ethnicity. So avoid him (and an awkward rejection based on your race) if you are Asian.