samhexum

LET THE INTRA-CITY WARS BEGIN... The Angels sign Tyler Anderson away from the Dodgers. *** The Mets claim Stephen Ridings off waivers from the Yankees. *** There was never a major league baseball player with the first name of Tyler before 1993. Now there have been over 50.

Anywhere the story's been printed. I can't be the only one reacting negatively to their concept of a reward. Because of this story I am NEVER going to buy that brand (that I've never even considered trying, let alone buying).

Hot dog wars! Sam’s Club undercuts Costco with $1.38 deal for franks and soda combo Let the hot dog and soda wars commence. Sam’s Club, the membership-only wholesale retailer owned by Walmart, is cutting the price of its hot dog and soda combination by 12 cents — from $1.50 to $1.38. The move undercuts Costco’s price of $1.50 for its hot dog and soda deal. In order to cope with inflation, Sam’s Club says it will raise prices on higher-end items such as rack of lamb and lobster tails while keeping the costs of Thanksgiving staples the same.

Magda?

And I saw Shaun and Jerry Hall (Mick Jagger's ex / ex-Mrs. Rupert Murdoch) in Bus Stop in London. So what?

WORST. CLUE. EVER! Fans have slammed a clue that appeared on “Celebrity Jeopardy!” calling it “tasteless” and “insensitive.” The clue — asked to actors John Michael Higgins, Wil Wheaton and Joel Kim Booster — was featured on Sunday night’s episode, in the category where all responses contained the letter “A.” The question read “In 2021, fugitive Brian Laundrie ended his days in Fla’s Myakkahatchee Creek area, home to these long & toothy critters.” The answer was “What are alligators” — and fans were critical of the show’s decision to mention Laundrie in the clue. Laundrie, 23, confessed to killing his 22-year-old girlfriend Gabby Petito while the couple were traveling across the country in a van. Laundrie’s remains were discovered a month later in the Myakkahatchee Creek Environmental Park on Oct. 20, 2021. “Jeopardy!” fans were horrified at the mention of Laundrie, furiously tweeting about the clue. This is almost as appalling as KFC in Germany bot-tweeting about Kristallnacht. https://nypost.com/2022/11/14/jeopardy-slammed-for-insensitive-and-appalling-clue/

Tony Burrows A prolific session musician, Burrows was lead singer on one-hit wonders "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)" by Edison Lighthouse, "United We Stand" by Brotherhood of Man, "My Baby Loves Lovin'" by The White Plains, and "Beach Baby" by First Class. My sister had the first two 45s, and I had the others. He had kind of a Shaun Cassidy-meets-Rick Springfield look when he was 28. He came to mind when @Stormy posted that weird thread about having the hots for Thomas Edison.

My sister, brother in law, & nephew just got back from visiting my niece, who is working at Disney in Florida. My niece made them all try vegan nachos, vegan chili, vegan tater tots. Which resulted in my brother in law having to vegan vomit in the parking lot. He texted me this gif: The few non-real versions of food I've tried have been massively underwhelming, so I was not surprised to hear that. REAL men need REAL food!

Elisabeth Röhm returned to direct last week’s episode, which was titled “Only the Lonely.” The opportunity came as part of NBC Universal’s Female Forward program, which is aimed at greater inclusion of women directors in scripted programming. “It was the first time I had done episodic [television], and I was really excited to have the support of the [Dick] Wolf camp and NBC,” Röhm tells TVLine. The episode also reunited Röhm with her former costar Sam Waterston, who plays DA Jack McCoy. “I couldn’t believe it. I was thinking myself, ‘How was I here not too long ago as a newbie, the next girl in line to play his sidekick, now getting the privilege to be a collaborator like this in a different way?'” she recalls of the experience. “He loves what he does [and] you can see it,” she adds. “He’s still so good and committed to his career, and he was really generous with me, really complimentary and rooting for me to succeed. He knows how much I love directing and how much I’ve been working on reinventing my career as a director.” With Röhm focused on directing, what does that mean for a potential on-screen return as ADA Southerlyn? While there are currently “no plans in the works” for an appearance, she confirms that it has been a conversation. “At this point, I would really love to just return in the captain’s seat and direct for them again, but I’m open to anything,” she says.

So much for doing the right thing. A German man who returned a $4.7 million check to the sweets giant Haribo after he found it on a train platform was awarded for his honesty with a few packages of candy, reports said Monday. “I thought that was a bit cheap,” Anouar G told the German tabloid Bild, according to the Independent. Earlier this year, Anouar, 38, was traveling home after a visit with his mom when he saw the check on a train platform, apparently discarded and unattended. When he took a closer look and realized the check was for €4,631,538.80, or about $4.7 million, he couldn’t believe his eyes, he told Bild. “There was such a large sum on it that I couldn’t even pronounce it,” Anouar told the outlet. The check was made out to Haribo from Rewe, a German supermarket. The Good Samaritan reached out to the gummy bear makers to inform them he’d found the check and the company asked him to destroy it and send proof that he did. Once he’d sent along the evidence, he was surprised when he received six packs of Haribo products a few days later, an apparent non-monetary thank you from the company. When Anouar griped that the treats didn’t really measure up, Haribo defended the decision and said it was their “standard package that we send as a thank you.” Okay, but it was REALLY bad PR for them. “Since it was a named check, nobody but our company could have redeemed it,” the company said. So they sent him some products with no redeeming value. https://nypost.com/2022/11/14/man-returns-4-7-million-check-to-haribo-gets-sweets-in-return/

An apartment and a 'schmear'... Rachel Zabar — of New York’s famed lox, bagel and babka family — has sold her downtown Manhattan loft for $3.15 million, according to property records. Although Zabar once told the New York Times that she worked in the bread, coffee and caviar departments as a teenager at the iconic gourmet grocer, she made her name as a high-end vintage couture dealer. Zabar tells Gimme Shelter she hasn’t lived in the home, located at 19 Bond St. in Noho, since 2006 — when she moved to LA. “I renovated it, and then rented it out. It was time to sell,” Zabar said. https://nypost.com/2022/11/14/zabars-scion-sells-chic-nyc-condo-for-3-15m/

Time Is Running Out for the Leap Second To the world’s timekeepers, the leap second is a kludge, a bane, a pain in the little hand. Now they’re proposing to ditch it. Will our days ever be the same? https://www.nytimes.com/2022/11/14/science/time-leap-second.html How are we all supposed to sleep tonight?

Anne Heche’s estate is being sued by the woman whose house burst into flames in the actress’ fatal car crash. What took so long? According to the lawsuit obtained Monday by Page Six, Lynne Mishele claims she and her pets almost lost their lives when Heche’s Mini Cooper plowed into her Los Angeles home on Aug. 5. Mishele claims Heche’s vehicle “barreled through the front of her house and deep into its interior” before coming “to a halt just feet away” from her, her two dogs named Bree and Rueben, and her tortoise named Marley. A tortoise named Marley? That's gnarly!

Man gets jump-rope stuck in bladder after shoving it into his penis

Sad developments for some of the songbirds of the 70s & 80s, now that they're in their 70s & 80s. It's been years since Linda Ronstadt, once the most highly paid woman in rock and roll, sang her last concert. In 2013, the world found out why: Parkinson's disease had rendered her unable to sing, ending a musical career that had left an indelible mark on the classic-rock era and earned her ten Grammy Awards.

OPINION Why Dave Chappelle’s ‘SNL’ monologue just wasn’t funny By Sara Nathan Dave Chappelle had the “SNL” audience — mostly — eating out of the palm of his hand Saturday night with his opening monologue. But in a bid to skewer our preconceptions on anti-Semitism, all he did was feed into the most common, most boring, ill-educated tropes and give them a platform on network TV. Watching it, I did a Tina Fey-style eye roll. Yes, Dave, everyone knows the Jews run Hollywood, oh ha bloody ha. Let me just reach for my Depends, you made me laugh so hard. Yes, Dave, everyone knows the Jews take off multiple holidays that you can’t even pronounce — “sha-na-na,” anyone? Yes, Dave, everyone knows the Jews run the media and, let’s face it, the entire economy. While we’re at it, I’ll let you in on a secret: We run the White House, too! And let me just introduce you to my cousin, Mr. Rothschild. Chappelle went on to say: “I’ve been to Hollywood and — no one get mad at me — I’m just telling you what I saw … It’s a lot of Jews. Like a lot.” Amid slight titters from the crowd, he added: “But that doesn’t mean anything! You know what I mean? Because there are a lot of black people in Ferguson, Missouri, it doesn’t mean we run the place.” The most troubling part of his monologue came when he brought up Brooklyn Nets star Kyrie Irving: “Kanye got in so much trouble that Kyrie got in trouble. This is where I draw the line. I know the Jewish people have been through terrible things all over the world, but you can’t blame that on black Americans.” The line was met with crickets, until a single audience member whooped. “Thanks, the one person that said ‘woo,’” Chappelle said. Can we all just remember that Irving was not blasted because he’s a black American? He was called out because he posted a link to an anti-Semitic film. For which he apologized somewhat late in the game. And this is where we get to the point — artfully and often raised by British writer David Baddiel in his book “Jews Don’t Count.” Because people think we have power, money and entitlement, it’s fine to mock “The Jews,” even under the guise of making fun of the tropes of anti-Semitism. But there are just 7.6 million Jews in America — out of a total population of 330 million — and we can’t all have millions in the bank or monopolize an entire industry. Still, Chappelle said, the “delusion that Jews run show business” is “not a crazy thing to think,” but “it’s a crazy thing to say out loud.” He also said of Kanye, “It’s a big deal, he had broken the show business rules. You know, the rules of perception. If they’re black, then it’s a gang. If they’re Italian, it’s a mob. If they’re Jewish, it’s a coincidence and you should never speak about it.” Chappelle has made millions from his cutting barbs on being black, he’s renowned for being one of our sharpest comics. Following Saturday night’s show, helmed by longtime executive producer Lorne Michaels — who is Jewish — Chappelle’s fans were quick to praise him for his biting commentary. But it takes one cursory Google search to find the recent uptick in anti-Semitic attacks across the world, and jokes like Chappelle’s only help fuel the fire. Yes, comedy is supposed to be provocative. And this is by no means a call to banish Chappelle into the hinterlands of social media purgatory. Please spare us the cancellation police. All I’m saying is, as a Jew, I can safely tell you, Dave — you just weren’t funny. https://nypost.com/2022/11/14/why-dave-chappelles-snl-monologue-just-wasnt-funny/ As a fat jew, I can't tell you how thrilled I am that Jews and fat people are about the only two groups you're allowed to deride or make fun of anymore. Chappelle switched ‘SNL’ monologue between rehearsal and live show Chappelle did a “fake” “Saturday Night Live” monologue during the show’s dress rehearsal, sources said, and then switched his material for the live show. A source told Page Six: “Dave does a fake monologue during the dress rehearsal, because he doesn’t want [‘SNL’ creator] Lorne Michaels, or anyone else, to know what his real monologue is.” The source added that Chappelle made a joke during the dress rehearsal about a writer who refused to work with him this week on the show. We previously reported that some staff writers were so furious that the comedy superstar — who’s made transphobic and homophobic jokes in his past comedy shows — was chosen to host that they were sitting out the episode. Jewish activist Rudy Rochman called the Chappelle monologue “a meticulous & calculated move to desensitize the population from anti-Semitism.” Time Out New York theater editor Adam Feldman argued, “That Dave Chappelle SNL monologue probably did more to normalize anti-Semitism than anything Kanye said.” Others defended the comic. Loni Love gave Chappelle support by tweeting, “The Chappelle monologue on [‘SNL’] tonight was the classic stand up he is known for… current events, timely and funny.” @JoeMendoza, I hope you're as disappointed as I am. https://pagesix.com/2022/11/14/dave-chappelle-switched-snl-monologue-from-rehearsal-to-show/ So he's a sneak and a coward, as well as a bigot. Very nice!

Pack of 10 poodles attacks California beachgoer and her elderly corgi service dog

I was sure this thread was going to be about @Stormy's weird obsession with dead inventors (or the singers of one-hit-wonder Love Grows Where My Rosemary Goes). Thomas Edison c. 1922

Caroline O'Connor didn't know what her ceiling was when she entered the sports business world, simply because there were so few examples of women who traveled her path. Turns out, she had no limit. The Miami Marlins promoted O'Connor to president of business operations on Monday, making them the first U.S. major sports franchise to have women serving simultaneously as president and general manager. The Marlins made history by hiring Kim Ng as GM in November 2020; two years later, they've made another significant move. "When I talk to young girls, I really like them to see me in my role because I didn't feel like I had that role model," O'Connor said. "And I want people to see themselves when they see me and know that it is a possibility."

Here's a better way to end it.

I wonder why I never read any follow up story about 2 deer suing a North Carolina man for $1 million each.

He was 76.

A Reddit poster has been getting lots of online support after refusing to skip college classes to watch seven siblings when the poster’s parents wanted to travel out of town for a getaway. “I am 21 and am the oldest of 8 kids with the youngest being 11,” Reddit poster “scoopertrooper219” posted on the subreddit “Am I the A–hole” on November 4. “My parents are both trauma surgeons and have always worked odd hours, so I essentially raised my siblings until I moved out for college,” the poster continued. The poster explained that he or she (gender not shared) is a senior in college — and moved off-campus to a three-bedroom house that is close to the family home. “My siblings come over every weekend and my parents pay me to keep them,” the Reddit user wrote. “This is usually fine since I’m a homebody, and I love being around my siblings.” The poster also noted that they are “very serious about school” — and that this weekend, the “third of five-weekend labs of the semester” is the priority. “Our labs are worth 30% of our final grade,” the poster said. “I told my parents that I wouldn’t be able to have them [the siblings] over this weekend, but it seems they completely disregarded it.” The poster went on to say that over dinner on a recent Sunday, the parents said they planned “a non-refundable weekend trip” — and when the poster told them he (or she) could not watch the younger kids, the parents “got upset.” “We went back and forth for a while and my mom said I was being selfish and asked me to miss my lab since it was ‘only 6% of my grade,’” the poster continued. “I told her that I didn’t have eight kids and they’re not my responsibility.” The poster said the mom “started crying, and my dad berated me for making her cry and asked me to leave.” The poster continued, “Neither of them will answer my texts or calls despite me apologizing, and I feel bad, but I just don’t feel like they’re seeing my side of things.” The poster added, “I’ve attempted to tell them but they won’t even talk to me, and neither will my youngest siblings (14, 12, 11), and it’s really making me sad.” The poster later added, “I feel like I could be wrong here because it [the college lab] is only 6% of my grade, but also I don’t feel like my parents are valuing my education the way I do, and that’s upsetting.” This article goes on (and on) about what they should do, but the answer is ridiculously obvious-- they are two SURGEONS. Tell them to hire somebody to watch the kids when they go away for a few days, and if they won't, kill them, collect your share of the estate, then YOU hire somebody to watch them while YOU go away for a few days. https://nypost.com/2022/11/09/i-told-my-parents-i-cant-skip-college-classes-to-babysit-my-siblings-my-mom-called-me-selfish/

A UK teen is being mocked mercilessly online after plunging her car into a river — right after nearly acing her driver’s test. A video detailing the car-tastrophe racked up 2 million views on TikTok before being taken down. “Just because you’ve passed your driving test well, it doesn’t mean you are an amazing driver,” Leia Darnell, 18, said of the fiasco. The Oxford native had reportedly been “over the moon” to take her Volkswagen Polo for a spin after passing her driving test two months ago with only one minor fault, per the clip. After visiting a fireworks show with her boyfriend, the teen drove home during dark and rainy weather. And since nothing bad ever happens on a dark and stormy night... Disaster struck after Darnell lost control of the car while going around a sharp curve and ended up in the water. “We launched over the river bank, all I remembered seeing at this point was trees in front of us,” the petrified driver described. “We then landed in water. I was so shocked and scared I didn’t even realize until my boyfriend shouted that the car was in water.” Things grew dire after “the car started rapidly filling up” with water, according to Darnell, who tried to open the door, to no avail. “I remember us both looking at each other and thinking that was it,” she recounted. Just when they thought their fate was sealed, she finally “managed” to kick the door open and swim to safety. “We escaped as the water was up to our necks, we swam out the car, leaving all personal belongings behind and climbed up the riverbank to get help,” Darnell recalled. She subsequently called the police, who informed them the situation would be a lot more dangerous had the car flipped over in the current. In the aforementioned TikTok clip, the new motorist can be seen proudly displaying her driving certificate and at the wheel of her new whip, which she reportedly purchased in January 2022. The camera then cuts to the Volkswagen submerged in the water as the caption “FML” flashes across the screen. The clip concludes with the boyfriend retrieving their belongings in a wetsuit and goggles, after which rescuers use a crane to extract the car from the drink. I'm surprised she could see anything with caterpillars on her eyelids https://nypost.com/2022/11/09/i-drove-my-car-into-a-lake-right-after-acing-drivers-test/ This is the fun gif that began this thread. It no longer shows up and I can't edit the post, but I thought it deserved another view.

Having “the talk” with your pre-teen and teen kids can be a joy, especially when their inquisitive minds don’t stop churning. One Aussie mom saw the hilarious side of it all after her 11-year-old daughter got the “puberty talk” at school, and came home with a few questions… for her brother. Sharing her story on TikTok, “The Spicy Mum”—as she’s known online—explained how her daughter first started by talking about wet dreams. “She looks at me in the car when I’m driving home and goes, ‘Mom, you know boys get wet dreams?’. And I’m like, ‘Do they honey? Yeah’,” she explained. “When you see an attractive girl, do you just get a boner?” “She then proceeds to look at her 13-year-old brother, who’s going through such an awkward stage of life, and goes, ‘so when you see an attractive girl, do you just get a boner?'” The question left the mom speechless, empathetic and in stitches all at the same time. “I don’t know what to say to that, the poor kid. Hilarious.” The questions didn’t stop there, though… The inquisitive young girl proceeded to ask her brother about what happened in the morning with his body. “She said, ‘so in the morning you wake up with a boner?’, and he so swiftly and confidently turned around and said, ‘it’s called the morning wood’.” “I love having kids, they’re hilarious” While the mom described the whole exchange as “another moment of holy s–t, you’re a mom to a teen” moment – she found it incredibly funny. “I love having kids, they’re hilarious,” she laughed. A lot of viewers commended the mom, who is a nurse, on her open communication parenting style. “The way your children communicate this openly with each other without embarrassment is good parenting on your part,” one person applauded. “Being open and honest, it’s the best way to go even though it’s hilarious. I don’t know how you didn’t burst out laughing when they were talking,” another person wrote. https://nypost.com/2022/11/08/my-11-year-old-daughter-keeps-asking-my-teen-son-about-boners/ One can only imagine the decadent depravity of a society that would yield hypersexualized children like these. SHAMEFUL!