OliverSaks

@Epigonos

So I could gain a little vegan, nonenhanced muscle and you would be okay?

Aren't Buddhism and Atheism contradictory?

Not if one exams the true nature of Buddhism.

Oops I did it again.

@Mocha,

Remaining alive and still escorting for ten years is a pretty low bar to set. You may have more street smarts, but ... [typed and erased a pretty nasty and piercing rebuttal, but that's not what I'm about / total waste of my time / drumming up negativity - you have to live with yourself, and that would seem to anyone on the forum to be punishment enough - I'm sorry you lack content and peace in your life; that sucks]

No one has ever tried to not pay me for what I provide. I am respectful to my clients, and thankfully, they generally treat me very well.

I find that I can deepthroat much better when 69'ing (depending on the shape and curve) - something about the angle allows me to slurp down quite a mouthful.

@JuniorNYC I don't feel attacked, and you make a good point.

I was trying to say that you are capable of feeling however you want about a situation - it is your right as a human.

I was also trying to point towards your ability to reframe the situation and make it hold less power over you, which admittedly I made a poor choice of words that was belittling and not my intent. Your post was somewhat in the moment and emotionally-riddled, and I was hoping to lend a different perspective so that you could let things go more swiftly.

Re: the triggered feeling from the situation to your past assault:

I'm very sorry that someone harmed you in that way. I would seriously consider checking in with yourself about what lingers from this experience and how it could still be affecting you today (and some things might still need to be resolved, especially in light of your comments above)

I have found that I am really only triggered by things that I have yet to resolve (self-esteem / worthiness / ugly duckling / abandonment) - and I continue to work on these things regularly (sometimes with the help of mental health professionals) - if you are triggered by something, and don't already do so, perhaps you have more work to do to move through it.

-0S

@Mocha Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I think a good rule of thumb in this forum is just to always take what Mocha says and do the opposite, provided that you want to feel content, peaceful, or whole-hearted, rather than jaded, angry, bitter, or a whole host of other negative emotions.

Junior, you are entitled to feel violated if you wish, but comparing your situation to rape does not sit well with me. You were fine providing your service to this client for x$ before the situation and during the situation, but then after because the money was x-60$ it became rape? I don't think that is really how it works. I don't intend to tell you how to feel, because again, I'm sorry you were shorted and I know that sucks, but I think giving the situation that much weight isn't going to be helpful to you.

Tell your story to a survivor of sexual assault or a violent crime (I am at least one of those) and be prepared for such a big eye roll or jaw drop that the person's anatomy might be irrevocably damaged.

@OliverSaks - Was your name inspired from the author, who wrote one of my favorite books?

 

“Music can lift us out of depression or move us to tears - it is a remedy, a tonic, orange juice for the ear. But for many of my neurological patients, music is even more - it can provide access, even when no medication can, to movement, to speech, to life. For them, music is not a luxury, but a necessity.”

― Oliver Sacks, Musicophilia

Indeed, my name is an homage.

Re: Karma: from a blog of one of my favorite Buddhist "masters" - Brad Warner, whose book "Hardcore Zen" I would highly recommend. (He spends some time on karma in the book, but here is a bit from his blog below"

"I've been seeing a lot of nonsense about karma regarding the recent disasters in Japan. There's a webpage going around that supposedly lists dozens of Facebook status updates saying the earthquake and tsunami were karmic retribution for the attack on Pearl Harbor. Now

The people who post these things about karma haven't got a clue in the world. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you cannot ever know someone else's karma. You can't even figure out your own.

I've often talked about how I can see karma operating in my own life. When I say that I am not referencing things like natural disasters and so-called "acts of God." I'm talking about how, when I act out of anger, angry action seems to come back to me, often from sources other than the object of my original anger. Same with greed, jealousy and all the rest. I am not talking about things like, I dunno, a bucket of soup falling on my head from a third floor window after I stole a copy of Penthouse from the newsstand or whatever. Get those kinds of ideas out of your heads, people!"

Annoying to get shorted, sorry it happened to you Junior, but I think ya'll could maybe think about karma in a more personally productive and less "violent" way.

-0S

You have a right to feel how you wish.

However, just consider that it probably isn't about you; maybe he's been stiffed before, and he has decided that he must count before leaving for his own peace of mind - it sucks to feel taken advantage of and I can see how he might just be protecting himself.

I don't count the donation near my clients, and I have been shorted before... I leave myself open to this, but I think the gesture of my trust certainly matters to some clients who treat me very kindly and generously.

Sounds like one is what he measured and the other is what the website calculated from the length in inches that he had to post.

That would be a plausible explanation, but actually both measurements were his own typed text!

When an escorts lists himself as 19 cm one place in the ad and 20 cm in another part...

Hmmmmm....

Intellectual-emotional disconnect!

I know all the reasons why I "shouldn't" feel the way I do - but the ego has a mind of its own.

I'm very content with all of this, just to be clear. @tristanbaldwin just said things so well, and it rang true to me.

Very vulnerable of you to post - kudos.

I'm finding my own insecure / jealous feelings creep in with all the "competition" that's constantly around on the board and on Rentmen: stronger, bigger, more rugged...

pornstars, athletes, bodybuilders...

Life is beautiful.

Blonde - Frank Ocean

"Ivy" - "Pink + White" - "Futura Free"

(Some of the album highlights, imo)

A year later and I've met one who I thought MAYBE might work out...but he lied about his age. Too young. Much too. Another would have been the one...right age, former Abercrombie model (literally an Abercrombie model) but was just soooooooooo messed up in terms of his life. Like, several CW bad boys in one. And not the good kind of bad. Arrest warrant bad.

 

But like some others on this board who have money, I'd rather find something semipermanent versus constantly seeking new rent men.

Just FYI, I prefer longer term arrangements with clients, too - I think most escorts prefer semipermanent regulars. It's safer, more convenient, and it allows a deeper connection to build over time (for escorts who offer more than the physical).

One of my first "boy in the closet" guilty pleasures - watched with mom and sister...

Sadly, I've not met any other escorts in real life. I've reached out to a couple for coffee or brunch (my treat) when I've been traveling to bigger cities, but usually get no response when I say that I'm another escort.

I look forward to trying again on my travels with some members of the forum. (Eric, for one)

No sign of you.

Science!!!

@OliverSaks, I had wondered if advertisers had some sort of override switch that negated our perceived anonymity.

I don't believe that is the case - I would be happy to validate this though. Visit my ad, and if you don't show up on my "who saw me" list (PM me your name, if you will), this will be settled.

I was under the impression that if you were not logged in to RM, or if you have turned profile visibility off, no one could see that you had visited their profile.

His method of "screening" does have some weaknesses.

I would put down a large deposit betting that it would end happily with me, but I can understand the general feeling from other posters in this thread.

It doesn't feel so daunting with a reputable escort with many positive reviews and a forum presence. A bad outcome in this situation could be equally as catastrophic for the escort; it isn't a totally no strings arrangement in that sense. If a situation like this were presented to me, I would absolutely be on my best behavior.

I would be very interested in a situation like this. I'm sending you a PM.

I think you made the right choice! But I hope you got a chance at his ass on another meeting.

 

I usually assume kissing is done once I've started rimming. But I've been pleasantly surprised before.

That's surprising to me - a shower beforehand usually makes things... palatable (for kissing, before and after)

Gilead offers a Rx copay rebate program - I get my PreP at no cost, with the exception of the necessary doctor's visit for testing every 2-three months.

Check the website (and some PreP studies (eg. DISCOVER) also offer complimentary Rx and associated costs) -- if anyone is near the Detroit metro area and would like details, let me know.