LivingnLA

Cost varies by location, $3000 -$15,000. Most programs are 6mo - 12 months, and 400 massage hours. A 600 hour massage program would be considered very in depth.

600 hours is a decent start. That range fits in many states, but minimum requirements are increasing and vary by state and country. New York and Florida require 1,000 hours minimum for licensing. California is headed that way too if they ever change from certification to licensing. https://www.abmp.com/practitioners/state-requirements

Another example, if you're in Canada, they require a 2 year in-depth program. https://www.rmtbc.ca/become-a-rmt/

I had this same discussion with a guy I hired a month ago. The hotel he was at was the kind that was long term and cheap....upon my arrival the place was infested with cops. Luckily I had met this guy before so I knew there was no problem. He was stunned when I told him there were cops all over the parking lot. He told me something that disturbed me.

 

Apparently there is a law now that allows police to use these cheap hotels as a means to arrest people with the hotel's cooperation. They are allowed to look into the hotels guest list and run every name listed for warrants. If they find a warrant, you're arrested right from the hotel room. I had no idea this law even existed. I know there are some that say "well don't have a warrant" but if your name is John Smith and you match someone else with the exact name......they don't ask questions first they just sweep you up and take you in.

 

He also said the police only go to the motels....not the fancy hotels. So if your staying at the motel 6 or if your hire is staying there.....I would be a little more cautious.....you just never know.

When was this? In 2015, the supreme court struck down a law that allowed police to compel hotels to open their registries. Now, a warrant is required or the hotel owner can freely offer, but they cannot be compelled by law. https://www.forbes.com/sites/katevinton/2015/06/22/supreme-court-rules-police-cannot-force-hotel-owners-to-give-up-registry-data-without-a-warrant/

I also need clarification on this @Axiom2001 I obviously know which one is the 1st ring, but what and where are the 2nd and the 3rd? Perhaps @LivingnLA or @Unicorn can complement with the proper names and location of those body "parts"?

Why me?

height=300pxhttps://2.bp.blogspot.com/-U5xyYiM_dK4/UW2DDJKGHoI/AAAAAAAAAMM/faCdCROY80g/s1600/6+Diagram+of+the+Rectum.jpg[/img]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_canal

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rectum

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigmoid_colon

I've written about this before. Here's the quick answer: The external anal sphincters are typically considered the first. The internal anal sphincter is usually considered the second. That's the Anal Canal, which goes from Anus to beginning of Rectum. The Rectum goes from the Anal Canal to the Sigmoid Colon. The sphincter at the Sigmoid is sometimes called the third ring. From Anus to Signoid is around 6.5 inches depending on overall body size. The Sigmoid is around 14 inches long, depending on body size. The Sigmoid's structure includes circular and longitudinal muscles, so it may feel like multiple sphincters. These are all smooth muscles. They aren't under conscious control. They'll only relax when someone feels absolutely safe and the penetration is slow enough to allow the body to feel safe and slowly adapt to the intrusion. Use lots of lube. Experiment with positions with a patient experienced top to find which work best for you. Also understand that aggressive, fast, or rough penetration could cause damage to these delicate tissues. That damage could easily require surgery. Take it slow and listen to your body. Don't force it.

https://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2016/03/what-you-dont-know-about-anal-sex-a-gastroenterologist-explains.html

FinDom is real. It's a form of Domination that covers multiple Masochistic interests, especially loss of control and humiliation. If you don't understand it, be grateful that your life experiences haven't led you to it because it frequently can become quite destructive. Here's an article that discusses one of the more well know FinDominatrixes, Goddess Haven: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-excess/201612/the-psychology-financial-dominatrixes

“Sometimes those who are charged with a great deal of control at work, at home or in their community may see this as an exciting way to relinquish control of one area of their lives. Or it could be the thrill of humiliation and ridicule. Just as some people associate praise and adoration with sexual arousal, others have an erotic script that is dominated by emotions that are traditionally viewed as negative. Being humiliated can be a turn-on, as it forces you to be vulnerable…A sexual fetish need not entail sexual activity in the traditional sense. Sex gives us a high or a pleasure rush and so too can financial domination/submission. I would leave it up to each pay pig to determine whether or not s/he considers this fetish sexual in nature…Having a woman more powerful than you, seductive and manipulative enough to get into your mind to make you WANT to willingly hand over your money… Maybe their wives are boring and don't offer much, maybe their wives are submissive and they just want the role switched. There's a different reason for every client."

I haven't hired since December. I had a few plans for weekends this year but all have been cancelled. Instead, I've invested the money and done very well in the market which hopefully means some fun in a year or two when life is approaching our new normal.

But it seems they only give HPV vaccines to people of certain age.

In late 2018, new research came out that led to the FDA updating the age limits for 9vHPV. By June 2019, the ACIP recommended updating the age range and the CDC agreed. For everyone getting vaccinated after 15, the recommendation is a 3-shot series. If you start the series before turning 45, it should be fine for your to complete the series, but your insurance may not pay for them, so plan accordingly.

https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/68/wr/mm6832a3.htm

https://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/acip/recs/grade/HPV-adults-etr.html

https://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/acip/recs/grade/HPV-harmonization-etr.html

https://www.cdc.gov/hpv/downloads/9vhpv-guidance.pdf

Sorry for the late update. I wasn't being a tease. I was collecting my facts and thoughts for a full report of what happened last night:

 

When I arrived, the door was open but the studio was dark and completely empty so I thought there was nobody in there.

I picked up my phone to call and confirm it was the case so I could just leave.

Then he popped up and asked me to follow him to his room. We were, indeed, completely alone in the studio.

 

When we walked into his area there was this amazing smell in the air. When I walked into his room I noticed he lighted up some candles.

He asked me to get undressed and get on to the table. He said "take your time" before closing the door.

While I was undressing I noticed a small monitor showing in CCTV the entrance of the studio. I didn't remember it from the 1st time I was there.

 

I got undressed just leaving my nicest dark grey boxers so he'd notice the color contrast under the drapes when coming back. Sorry, @Daverwr I don't own or use jockstraps. I also slightly opened my legs as per @azdr0710 recommendation and put my arms above the drapes so they could be more at reach from the edge of the table. It's not a wide table, that's how it was easy for him to rub his c*ck against my elbow the first time even though I had my arms closer to my body on that occasion. Btw, I know what I felt the 1st time @coriolis888 I'm old enough to realize when someone is rubbing his c*ck against me and not another body part. I also lowered the drape below the middle of my back, closer to my butt. Before I had it a bit above my middle back because we had only discussed the upper back. He did massage my middle back this time.

 

When he came in, there was maybe 1 min of silence while he was preparing. I was thinking "maybe he noticed my boxers under the drape".

I believe he noticed that this time my arms were on top of the drape so right before starting he said: "I'm going to put my thighs so I can start the massage", and he did, so he started massaging and I could feel his thigh rubbing against my elbow.

 

He then started making some conversation about working from home and people wearing suits and underwear during zoom calls. I thought he was trying to introduce the topic of underwear in our conversation so I told him that I normally wear shorts or underwear while I work from home. Not sure if that was the right or wrong answer. As I said before I'm a zero when it comes to the "one thing led to another" game. In any case, I was just letting him lead the session as everyone suggested.

 

When he turned around to look for some more oil I took that as a chance to send a subtle sign so I moved my right arm a bit more towards the edge of the table. I think he noticed when he turned back because right before continuing with the massage on that side of the table, he tapped my elbow in a light but assertive way without saying a word. I reacted instantaneously, slightly moving my elbow closer to my body. And this time he didn't even put his thigh by the side of the table. He instead took 1 to 2 steps away from the table and extended his arms to keep massaging my back's right side.

 

I believe from that point everything went downwards. He became less chatty, most of the rest of the session was in complete silence except for me trying to reestablish some sort of conversation which of course I failed at. And different from the previous session, no moaning at all. I actually followed your advice, not to the point of saying "yes, that feels good" or moaning myself, but I took some deep inspirations and exhalations that were easily interpreted as signs of relaxation and that he was doing a good job at relaxing my muscles, which he did not react to, at all.

 

From that moment, the rest of the session felt like an eternity. I believe at some point he got closer to the table on the right side but I could only feel something like a paper or envelope in his pocket, that was it. Just a few minutes before finishing the session he asked about my plans for the long weekend which I replied to that I was just going stay home and relax (after all, those are pretty much the government guidelines since we are in the 2nd wave of Covid).

 

I decided to just keep silent and let him do his job. When he finished he softly grabbed my arms and put them below the drapes and brought the drapes to the level of my neck and pressed with his hands on the area he was just massaging while saying with a soft voice "I'm doing this to remove the oil off your back". Then he left the room, said again "take your time", and closed the door.

 

When it was time to leave I just went to his desk to pay. Since he decided to step back and keep the flirting off I also decided to step back and keep my generous tip, I just tipped 10%. He didn't even ask "if/when will I book the next session", or "I hope to see you soon", or "you still need more work on your back, let's schedule the next session on ... ". He just said: "I'll see you when I see you."

 

These are some confirming/conflicting signs that have kept me thinking since last night:

• He didn't ask/mention if I have a wife, or girlfriend, not even in the 1st session. Neither did he mention his girlfriend in this one.
  
• He didn't talk about sports or other "straight" topics, neither he mentioned his girlfriend as a way to dissuade me from any advances.
  
• I checked his reviews and I discovered there are at least 5 5-star reviews of young handsome gay men.
  
• Perhaps there were cameras inside his massage room and that was the reason he was "behaving" so much? I don't care anymore.
  
• Perhaps underwear after the prior session I had my pants on was too much too soon? I don't care anymore.
  

 

Conclusion:

• I'm not looking forward to anything more to happen but I will complete the other 2 sessions (doctor's orders) just because he's good at what he does (I have a lot less pain than during the first session). I will provide little to no tip though. And after the last session, it's over.
  
• The fantasy was good while it lasted but I do have well-certified masseurs among my go-to guys here in Toronto and 1 of them is actually straight and provides me with amazing full service (massage + all extras) with no false hopes or fuzzle. We're just waiting for Covid to be over as he's also taking some time off from work. Ontario seems to enter in a 2nd lockdown due to a steep increase in Covid numbers and we need to be careful.
  

Sounds like it was a misread or perhaps he felt the arm move was too aggressive or eager. This was only the second of four sessions? If he was curious, his behavior at the end of the session was firmly shutting that down. Appreciate and enjoy his therapeutic expertise and go back to your "amazing full service" guy for the extras.

I've been told I'm overly trusting or generous, so perhaps it goes with the territory. Here are my relevant tales:

Back in college a friend needed money for a family emergency, I "loaned" him what he needed. He agreed to a repayment schedule and then didn't honor it. About 5 years later I receive a letter with a check, so I was eventually repaid even with a little interest.

About a decade ago, a workout buddy who I met at the gym 5-6 times a week for over a year asked for some help because his car was breaking down and he was worried he'd losing his job without a car. I gave him the 15k he needed for a used car. He promised to pay it back when he could. Everything was good for a couple months and then he vanished. Another couple months go by and suddenly he's back. Turns out the money was for a deposit and first/last rent on a new place for him and his gf. It took much longer than originally promised, but he eventually paid me back, left his gold digging gf, and at one of our parties met the woman he's now married to, so I guess that worked out well.

I guess I saved the best for last? The first time I hired, I made a critical mistake of not paying attention to the drinks I was offered. One was spiked with something that resulted in a 7 hour blackout, waking up naked on the bathroom floor, and an escort who was upset about me over drinking and a wasted night. I only remembered having the a beer and a shot or two, but I was very nervous since it was my first time, so I believed him, apologized, and paid for the night even though I'd only booked a 2 hour session. I stumbled out to my car only to realize my brand new iphone was missing. He claimed innocence and I wasn't thinking clearly, so after a little searching I went home thinking I'd somehow lost it. I disabled it as soon as I got home. Over the next couple weeks, it would appear and disappear on apple's tracking. Then one night, after I'd called the wireless company to disable/blacklist the phone, it appeared on the map around 4 am 20 minutes from my house. I'd supposedly lost it over an hour away. I never recovered it. All told, that night cost me a couple grand but that's cheap compared to dying from a drug overdose.

Not at all - be respectful but direct: I enjoyed your pics - are you currently clean shaven?

This is the best approach. It has the benefit of clearly stating your interest without being rude and puts the control of his appearance right where it belongs, in his hands. Unless you're planning to hire for a week or however long it would take him to regrow his beard because he likely has clients into hairy guys.

Oh dear, I'm afraid the best I can now aspire to be is a new category - the GILF. I'm too old to make the age cut for DILF. So I guess I have to hope someone might view me as a Grandfather I'd Like to F__k. Sadly, I don't really think this is an idea whose time has come. But hey, isn't 60 the new 30/40? I live in hope.

GILF

GILF or “Grandma I’d Like to Fuck” is a natural evolution from the previous term. That is if you’re into grayhaired and wrinkled chicks. GILF porn is quite prevalent and surprisingly popular, but it often involves some pretty hot pornstars by any standards. Anilos.com is an excellent place to start if you into ripe old babes.

Here is something else to learn.

 

It is possible that you mistook his rubbing against you for a semi-hard cock. It is difficult to be certain what is beneath a uniform or clothing.

 

If you say to him (as you suggested) "that feels good" or "yes, right there" - it is possible you are mistaking an innocent maneuver for something else entirely. You might find yourself in an embarrassing situation.

 

There are too many willing providers that make it clear they are available for more than a massage.

That's certainly possible. It's important for him to be discreet and relaxed about the interactions because you're right, he could be misreading the situation. In my limited experience, it usually takes the client provider relationship being well established before everyone relaxes enough for unexpected extras to appear in a professional session.

This is probably a fundamental question. Let's say you plan to be with someone over a weekend and you know that each weekend day will contain activity that you would like to be protected by 2-1-1 PrEP. So from reading the thread, if you consider just one of the days you would take 2 pills optimally 24 hours before and then 1 pill each of the days after. But how about that middle day. I have a feeling you would not take 2 pills 24 hours before that. Does the first two pill dose cover that (followed by one pill per day after that)? Or is there some other set up you would recommend. Thanks.

https://www.sfaf.org/wp-content/uploads/downloads/PrEP-211-study-info-flyer-ENGLISH-FINAL2.pdf

https://www.sfaf.org/wp-content/uploads/PrEP-211-study-info-flyer-SPANISH-final2.pdf

2-1-1 PrEP is only for anal sex. Take 2 pills 24hrs before your first sex session. Continue taking 1 pill, at the same time, every day as long as you're engaging in anal sex. Once you've had your last round of anal sex then continue taking a daily pill at the same time for 2 more days.

Yes, if I knew he was going to flirt this way I would have booked a longer time from the beginning, which I did for my session tomorrow.

 

Pain in shoulders and upper back down to the middle back. No lower back involved.

 

Deep tissue but the last 15 min he has very sensual with the moaning. Or perhaps it was all in my mind, I don't know.

 

No restrictions of movement. My pelvis is fine. I would definitely love if he "pulls my glutes"

I just don't want to make up anything that he'll know it's fake and then he'd stop seeing me.

Don't be too eager or pushy. As others have said, follow his lead. This is risky for him. Though, why did he do it? Are you famous? A local celeb or something? It's very unlikely, but could this be some kind of set up? You could overthink this all day. It's best to try and relax and go with the flow. You'll at least get some good massage out of it.

Ok, so did he do any anterior chest and neck work? All of those muscles are typically involved in shoulder and upper back issues. Don't make up anything. Just mention stuff that's happening in your body.

You guys are telling me not to be creepy.

It's not creepy to remove your pants if they're work slacks you don't want to wrinkle or if it would make you more comfortable and help you relax. What would make it creepy would be looking right at him and saying you plan to remove your pants and throw in a wink. That would be weird.

Yes, we only discussed upper back.

 

Yes, and yes.

 

This is now my plan! What would be a credible reason for him to expect me to take my pants off for the last 3 sessions?

You had a 30min back session last time? What sort of back issue is it? If it's lower back, pelvis muscles are likely involved. What sort of work was done in the last session? It would be plausible to say the issue remains but feels difficult. Perhaps your glutes now feel like they're pulling? Or is your pelvis anteriorly or posteriorly rotated? In other words, does your pelvis feel like it's pushed forward or backward? Do you have any restrictions for movement? Lower back issues frequently have glute, quad, and/or psoas involvement. All require different approaches depending on what causes the issues for you.

Since you mentioned he's an RMT, that's Canada, yes? The training and regulations there are the real deal. Don't over read anything about this session except for the physical contact. If he's legitimately an RMT, pressing his penis into you is not an accident, especially since he did it twice. But, as you suggest, that may be as far as he'll go. I've known plenty of attractive men and women over the years who flirt and use the temptation of their assets to make some money. Being in a separate room with a door is pretty typical in a spa or legitimate massage business, except for places with a chiro/PT focus, then you get the one big room with everyone together. Or in those Asian places with hanging dividers, but the vibe in such places is usually very clear.

As others have said, you need to relax and enjoy whatever you're experiencing. He needs to be driving. You say you came in for back trouble? Any good LMT/RMT will have done an assessment and identified the problem spots, which for lower back issues, are frequently related to pelvic muscles. Is he draping you with a sheet? If yes, then does he step out to give you time to undress? Then remove your pants and keep your underwear on for a session or two and see how it goes. Let him know when something feels good or he's found a trouble spot. It's not always clear to the MT. Again, be relaxed, respectful, and non-pushy, even the penile contact is enough to cause an investigation that may cost him his career. Don't be a creep about it.

Especially in the picture of him in the suit.

 

~Boomer~

He's wearing a suit? I didn't notice.

Generally speaking and assuming healthy tissues in the mouth and throat, the risk for HIV transmission is extremely low in oral sex without condoms. It is not zero, but it is very low. That is not true for many other STIs. Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Hepetitis, Herpes, HPV, and Syphilis are all readily transmitted via oral sex without condoms. Part of the reason we have record breaking numbers for these infections is probably all the oral sex without condoms and the people who think oral sex is safe. There's no such thing as safe sex. It is possible to make sex safer, but never 100% safe when one or more people are involved.

If you're going to engage in oral sex without a condom for cock sucking or a dental dam for eating ass or pussy, then educate yourself on the risks, learn what symptoms may feel and look like, understand that most infected men are asymptomatic, get tested regularly, and understand that some STIs are able to colonize the rectum or throat in such a way that they don't show on blood/urine tests. Only swab tests will catch them, so be honest with your doctor about the condomless sex you have so the correct tests can be performed and you can be treated. Also, talk to your doctor about your vaccinations. HPV is a must, (if you're under 45, to help protect against the record growth in oral cancers. Hepatitis A/B vaccines are strongly encouraged for MSM (Men who have Sex with Men). And depending on where you live or travel, the meningitis vaccine may be recommended. For example, LA has had an outbreak for about four years now and encourages every MSM be vaccinated. Finally, understand that antibiotic resistance is becoming urgently concerning for gonorrhea in the USA. I mention this because STIs are serious health issues. Don't trivialize them because they're treatable. The big three (gonorrhea, chlamydia, and syphilis) are likely to become fully resistant to current treatments over the next few decades. Know the risks, make your choices, and be mature enough to be honest about them with your doctor and with your sexual partners.

The coronavirus impacted STD/STI testing and is expected to continue to impact it for the foreseeable future, since the USA was already seeing record highs for multiple STIs it's important to know we don't have good visibility into STI rates in the USA right now. Distancing has likely reduced sexual activity so perhaps it's a wash. Escorts and MSM are high risk categories so understand the risks you're taking. Get the relevant vaccines if you haven't already and be a responsible human being as you fulfill your sexual interests.

In the interests of full disclosure, I have all my shots and I'm tested regularly. I have one regular fuck buddy and an occasional professional who catches my eye. I like the taste of precum and cum. Over the past couple of decades, I've had oral chlamydia once. It was scary but fortunately I caught it early because I felt the sore throat and it was treatable. I am getting more careful about who I have sex with because LA county continues (6 years now) to set records for multiple STIs and syphilis among women is climbing rapidly, in part probably because of increasing MSM activity among sexually flexible men between 25 and 35, which means congenital syphilis is increasing too and no child should catch it.

General Resources:

https://www.cdc.gov/std/prevention/default.htm

https://www.cdc.gov/std/healthcomm/stdfact-stdriskandoralsex.htm

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/oral-sex-std-risk-chart

Metaphorically speaking, it's me.

Huge turmoil behind the scenes at the LA Times. Hard to believe...

https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/business/story/2020-09-21/la-times-shaken-by-a-summer-of-turmoil-and-scandals

It's hopefully a long overdue reckoning.

Feeling much better today, and no longer fantasizing my hands on the throat of the pharmacist.

I'm glad you're feeling better. The shot was fine for all of us, though one had a sore arm for a couple days.

There are other ways to choke the pharmacist. ?

I always sleep naked. When I get up, I don't put on underwear but pyjamas. I put on my underwear only when I go out. Since I stay at home most of time during the pandemic, I often don't wear underwear for a few days in row.

I used to when the kids were little and likely to wake us up or sleep with us because I wanted my morning wood well controlled. Now, I'm back just in my boxer briefs because I run hot. Nude is just one step too far for me.

You just nailed it.

 

Consenting adults don't need to be judged. Findom is nothing more than power-exchange and roleplay.

 

Don't forget that the 'slave' is the one who's always in-control. When the money stops, the findom is finished.

You know me, I love many BDSM scenes.

@Hung_Cody I believe the Bible says, "judge not, lest ye judged". It also says I should be killed for laying with other men. I disagree with both ideas. I'm not hating or being puritanical, rather pointing out something toxic to be avoided. My reaction would be the same to a positive post about NAMBLA, wife-beating, or racism. Living in a free society doesn't mean we abandon reason or standards.

I don't want to derail this thread, so feel free to DM, but I'd be interested in understanding the perspective that "Findom" is in the same category as pedophila, domestic abuse, or racist bigotry/violence? Findom can be a healthy kink if we're talking fully informed consensual kink exploration. But, if we're talking about actually abuse/manipulation then that's problematic in a number of ways.

I’m curious if SA has college athletes (e.g. swimmers, rowers, etc.), I know it’s a random question. However, curious if those types of guys could be found there.

It's been a long time since I was on SA, but one time I was looking while visiting a local college and recognized one of their division 1 athletes. I didn't pursue, way too close to home. Another time, I met an athlete in grad school with the largest blessing I've ever experienced. Beyond those two gems, a whole lot of time wasters and scammers filled my inbox until I became proficient at filtering and spotting them. SA is much more about the patient stalking hunt than the wham bam hookup of apps and bars.