Just Chuck

I’ve heard of OnlyFans performers holding “Fuck-a-Fan” contests and drawings with their followers. I saw one who was doing it as a fundraiser for a charity animal shelter. I was a little tempted to contribute and enter except the performer was going to require the winner to sign a release and then film and publish the scene.

I’ll recommend this article "What Cisgender Men Should Know Before Hooking Up With Transgender Men and Transmasculine Folks - Nov 11, 2019 By JD Davids”. I’ve met a few FTM escorts and dated a non-escort FTM guy several years ago. They tend to be very brave and tough people. It’s worth asking something like, “is there anything I can do or avoid doing to not make you feel bad, like using wrong terminology or focusing on body parts that make you uncomfortable?” A guy I was with was wearing a thick chest binder (think of an extra-heavy-duty sports bra) under a leather bulldog harness when we met. I didn’t think anything of it. During play, I reached and touched his chest without thinking about it (he had photos of himself topless in his profile and his chest looked great in those, so I thought it’d be okay.) When I cupped his chest, he winced and I immediately knew I’d touched off a dysphoria trigger. It didn’t create much of an issue and the rest of the date went fine, but I wished I’d known the trigger before I bumbled into doing that.

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I’ve only used a sling twice. I bottomed for someone who was MUCH taller than I am and the sling made it very comfortable when other positions we tried before moving to the sling were still good, but a little awkward. The second time I topped a guy who was about my height and build. And again, it was very comfortable. As top, it was easy to both be in control of the intensity and pace of the action. I could bounce the swinging bottom back and forth vigorously and thrust in and out without as much physical effort as it would have taken without the sling. The first time, we used a solidly built but portable sling. The second time, the sling was permanently mounted to the building itself and very heavy duty. I think the second one could have handled repeated sessions of rough sex between a pair of champion sumo wrestlers without any problems. The fact that the second one didn’t make a lot of noise and felt so solid was a great part of the session. It didn’t distract at all from the festivities. The first one was solid enough and good quality but did rattle and sway a little during the session. I don’t think I’d want a cheap sling frame. I think rattling, squeaking, swaying, or bouncing from the frame would be a disappointing distraction. The owner of the portable sling frame had placed it on a very dense rubber mat that helped it feel solid, make less noise, and not “walk” across the floor during use. The mat reminded me of horse stall mats that are available in farm supply stores inexpensively. The owner of that sling had installed the convex “shoplifter mirrors” in in all four upper corners of the sling frame and you constantly had a great view of the action. I really don’t have experience comparing brands of slings or frames, but I’ve heard guys say they really like the JimSupport brand.

While sex is biological (mostly), gender is a social construct. Gender presentation and behavior vary with cultures and times. For example, we would find a male political leader wearing a wig, makeup, and tights pretty odd today. I’ve always been perceived as pretty masculine. I am bi-/pan-sexual and I’m attracted to the entire spectrum of sex, genders, and gender presentations. Whether I’m attracted or not, I feel very protective of gender and sexual minorities.

I give some guys who are just dipping their toes into the sex work pool a pass on being pickier about seeing clients. I’ve met students or early career guys who need some extra money for rent or a car payment but has never really aspired to become higher-volume career sex workers. They are just one step from the guys seeking “gen” arrangements on hookup apps. They can bring themselves to provide services for money, but only to some. They might not be good enough actors or poker players to provide services to guys they aren’t at least a little attracted to and I’d rather have them decline my business than provide me bad service.

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