fancyboot

Chances are that the provider does not care what your life away from him entails as far as your orientation, or at the least, he does not care about knowing as much as you care about telling.  So when you are ready, tell him what you want him to know.  He has heard it all and it likely does not rub him the wrong the way.  
As far as being out, I was happy in a monogamous heterosexual relationship and as a result, I did not start seeing men until I was almost 50,  It seems that at that age no one really cares with whom you have sex and it may be that some do not believe that sex happens for people over 50. Being widowed, did occasionally raise the question as to whether I would date again or marry again.  I did ty dating again and did not care for it with either sex.   In any case, my situation now is Don't Ask, Don't Tell.  They don't ask and I feel no responsibility to discuss my sex likes with them.  I also do not ask them about their sex life.  To me, it is rude to ask  and it is really none of my business if my friends or relatives are having sex, how often, with whom, in what position.  On the rare occasion that sex comes up in conversation with my friends, it is usually relating funny experiences and long past stories, which have been told numerous times in the past. 
In my office, I do have a gay pride flag that was given out by the hospital years ago and which sits wordlessly on top of a cabinet. If people notice, they do not ask.   A few months ago, while taking photos for a graduation of medical residents, there was a different group taking photos for Gay Pride month and they asked for Gay and Gay Allied persons to join their photo.  I did so.  Again without comment from me or to me.  
So really, at this point, my sex life to others is more. Don't Care and Please Keep it to Yourself.  

As we used to say in the men's coming out group I co-facilitated, the only person you need to come out to is yourself. Everyone else is optional.
We also used to say that you need to protect and provide for yourself. If being out would jeopardize your safety, living situation, or livelihood, then don't come out until you are in a better situation.
That said, when being closeted starts gnawing at a person and they feel like they are "living a lie" or "not being genuine," it's time to think about what one is getting from being closeted vs the hesitation to be out. 
To answer your question, everyone has a different feeling about men who are not out. Additionally, there are as many definitions of "being out" as there are people. I consider myself to be an out gay man. I have no qualms discussing dating men vs women, I have no qualms about joining LGBT groups at work, and I don't hide who I am. However, I don't declare to everyone I meet that I am gay. I did that 25 years ago and there's no reason to keep doing it. If someone doesn't understand what it means when I discuss a boyfriend, or joining an LGBT employee resource group, or any other myriad things gay men do, then that's on them. I'm a terrible artist and can't draw them a picture.

I’m out to those close to me.  Otherwise I’m so far in the closet that I’m in Narnia. 

One risk with meeting closeted guys, especially in my area, is finding out they're married after the fact. I personally do not like being with someone cheating on their partner. I don't mind if they're in open relationships, however. That used be primarily just the closeted ones you had to worry about, since there's a lot of guys from sexually conservative cultures in my area who married for family obligations.  These days it's almost as many guys in same sex marriages stepping out.  Plus ça change!  

Sometimes younger Americans forget how dangerous it often was in the past to be "out" in America, and how dangerous it still is in many parts of the world. Gay men anywhere have many reasons other than legal or physical danger to want to stay "in the closet." Being openly gay may affect their livelihood, their acceptance in a religion that is important to them, their personal relationships with family or other important persons in their lives. One's sexual orientation or sexual behavior is something that one can manage to hide more easily than one's race, physical disabilities, lack of education or financial means, and other issues that affect one's social interactions.
That being said, staying in the closet can have psychological repercussions, given how important one's sexuality is to a healthy, integrated personality. In my late teens, I had what was loosely called a "nervous breakdown," and my parents sent me to see a counseling psychologist. He gave me the best advice--and surprising advice in those days--which was to always tell the truth to myself about who I was, and to be honest with my loved ones, even if it was hard to do. In other situations, be as honest as you could be pragmatically (this was in the early 1960s, when being homosexually active  was illegal and could get one expelled from school, fired from a job, banned from the military, and even sent to prison). I went home from his office, and told my parents I was "homosexual" (they had no idea what "gay" meant), and to my relief they did not seem openly upset (my mother asked, "How do you know?" which caused me to start laughing and relax). I was already out to a couple of my closest friends, and from then on I was ready to admit my orientation to anyone else who asked. Within a couple more years I had met new friends who were very active in the burgeoning gay rights movement and had joined them in their activities; when a photo appeared in a major newspaper of me taking part in a protest, I gave up any pretense of not being gay.
I do not condemn anyone who stays in the closet for a good reason, though I still would encourage them to be as honest with themselves and as open with others as is possible for them. I agree that those who are stridently homophobic are usually fighting against fear of being perceived as gay by others.
 

I cannot judge people for being closeted, in most cases. In a perfect world everyone could be out without judgement, estrangement, or risk of harm, but that is not the case in many places.
Being in the closet forces people to be dishonest to the people around them and frequently themselves.  Unfortunately, even today, they feel it is necessary to keep relations with friends and family, or even their safety in certain communities.  The recent case of the mayor in Alabama who took his own life after being outed is just one example of the cruel toll this takes on people who feel they cannot be open with who they are.
The people I do hold in contempt are those who have power who engage in anti-LGBT rhetoric while being in the closet themselves.  It's so common to be almost cliche that politicians or pastors who are stridently anti-gay are likely to have something to hide. These people do very real harm, leading to isolation, fear, and risk of violence for the people they target.
 

very good  massage skills.  easy on the eyes is an understatement.  I would hire again for sure

I always book him when he's in town.  Seems like many of us have connected with him.  Always has a table, always a good massage.  😀

I always book him when he's in town.  Seems like many of us have connected with him.  Always has a table, always a good massage.  😀

One of my favorite,  I see him everytime he is in Dallas.  When you first meet him could use more social skills.  I love his looks.  After the first session I was a little bit on the fence.  Tried him again and I was hooked.  I think he is a little shy.   Definitely not a cookie cutter massage,  one minute he is working on you back and the next working on you feet, but it works for me.  Now we have great conversation, he is nude and come with a HE.  I can only speak for my sessions.

well hell he seems sexy but i was warned about him from this site....i inquired anyhow cuz if not him then the other providers wouldn't even give Vannah enough energy to turn the letters. But if Vannah had the emails with him that I did, she'd turn that alphabet with venom.
Who the F#%$ does this guy think he is. He is the most entitled person I have exchanged missives with in trying to set up an appointment. He wrote me two hours before set in sandstone appointment  because suddenly a guy in vegas wanted him for an overnight....so paxton said you can have my husband. I think he meant have an appointment with his husband the aforementioned Jason. For all I know the overnight  featured a hefty income so maybe he did mean take my husband off my hands. I digress.
He did not apologize while thinking he did the right thing discarding his beloved the way Carlee Russell did that baby on the interstate. 
He said his former partner (I would think they are former by now) would contact me 'eventually' with an address.
Eventually my ass! I passed on the rejected jason. I didnt turn letters but by God I let the language fly in our last exchange.  He wrote back telling me I was rude for not understanding. LMAO

ooofff. I hate it when they find this forum. 

Guess what? Gone.

They use a lot of mousse. 

A moose walks on your back.  After that, you won't ever need a massage again, hehe.

WhileI believe he did it, I think I would have felt compelled to acquit based on the cops' handling of the blood sample. They injected reasonable doubt into the case by fucking taking his blood to the crime scene. They were sloppy and possibly actually criminal themselves if they scattered some there.

it was sensual

https://rentmasseur.com/MaxBig he may fit the bill for you 

I'd love to hear feedback on JeremyXL in the Ft. Lauderdale area.  I'm curious to try him sometime.
 

excellent massage and a nice guy to boot.
 

I try not to demand too much from my masseur. If he cums, great. If he doesn't, that's fine.  
 

Mine usually do, and it's funny because it's OK with me if they don't. In fact, sometimes I wish they'd hold off. I've had my fair share of 40-minute one-hour appointments .

How do openly gay/bi men feel about men who are not out?  Is it like wearing a scarlet letter?  

My views on that has changed as I have grown older and wiser. Originally, I resented them, and I didn't like them at all. I used to view them as wanting the joys of sex between men, but hiding from the responsibilities that come with being gay. I saw them as opportunists. In the community where I grew up, the closet cases I knew were the type that attacked gay men as way of shifting the focus out of themselves. That was part of what made me resentful.
That type of closeted guy still exists today, and I still reject and resent them, but I've also learned about the ones I never heard of before. Many men find themselves in situations where they cannot be out, and they do not attack gay men in a lame attempt at keeping their cover. Many value having a family, children, their faith and other things that go against their sexuality, more than being open about who they are. It's a decision that they have made, but they don't judge others who don't make the same decision.
So today I know that there are different reasons why some men hide their true sexual orientation, and I have to put my money where my mouth is. That is, I claim that I am open minded and non-judgemental, so I dont' judge them or their situation, I only set boundaries with the ones who seem to need to attack gay men or trans people to reinforce their closeted status.

How do openly gay/bi men feel about men who are not out?  Is it like wearing a scarlet letter?