MenLoveAvenue

Cole used to do sketch comedy on YouTube with Jeffrey Self ages ago, and I always loved his Bernadette Peters bits. Recognized him on the street near Times Square maybe 15 years ago (??) in the middle of the day and got to tell him how much I enjoyed his work. He's a sweetheart. 
Oh, and Conrad Ricamora? from the first time he appeared on HTGAWM, I was smitten.

Jeffrey and Cole reminisce about sex work last month at The Strand 
 

I realized that I was sexually attracted to other males when I was an adolescent, but I was aware that I wasn't supposed to be, so I wasn't open about it, since it was assumed that boys who were attracted to other boys were rather obviously effeminate, and I wasn't. Yet the male friend whom I was most closely drawn to in high school turned out to be not only gay but already sexually active, though he didn't announce it either. It wasn't until after I had my first sexual experience at 17 with an older male, and told him about it, that he revealed to me that he had been having sex with older males for years, but also was not open about it. We were not sexually attracted to one another, so coming out to one another didn't affect our relationship, although I think some of our classmates suspected that we might both be gay, since we spent so much time together.
I think I have told the story on this site before about my having a nervous breakdown at 19 because I was involved in a non-sexual romantic relationship with a girl, and the psychotherapist my parents sent me to told me that I would get relief by being honest about my sexuality with my family and my girlfriend. So I came out to my parents, who were bemused, and to the girlfriend, who was confused. I didn't announce my orientation to the world, but if anyone was interested enough to ask me, I didn't deny that I was gay. By my mid-20s, however, I was starting to become radicalized by gay friends who were active in the gay rights movement (this was the 1960s), and from then on I was openly out. Amazingly, I don't think I ever suffered in any way from my openness, because I didn't flaunt my sexual orientation--I just didn't hide it. I lived with a male partner for 56 years (legally married for the last dozen years), and family, neighbors and employers all seemed to accept the situation without comment. Maybe I was just lucky (that's with a small L).

Cole used to do sketch comedy on YouTube with Jeffrey Self ages ago, and I always loved his Bernadette Peters bits. Recognized him on the street near Times Square maybe 15 years ago (??) in the middle of the day and got to tell him how much I enjoyed his work. He's a sweetheart. 
Oh, and Conrad Ricamora? from the first time he appeared on HTGAWM, I was smitten.

Jeffrey and Cole reminisce about sex work last month at The Strand 
 

here's a link to VGL Gay Boys circa 2009
 

Cole used to do sketch comedy on YouTube with Jeffrey Self ages ago, and I always loved his Bernadette Peters bits. Recognized him on the street near Times Square maybe 15 years ago (??) in the middle of the day and got to tell him how much I enjoyed his work. He's a sweetheart. 
Oh, and Conrad Ricamora? from the first time he appeared on HTGAWM, I was smitten.

here's a link to VGL Gay Boys circa 2009
 

First of all, mid-30s is not old. Second, it sounds like you’re looking for something real but trying to find it in places that aren’t giving you what you need. Maybe it’s time to rethink where and how you’re looking instead of doubling down on what’s not working. Intimacy from an escort is a transaction, not a relationship. If you want something deeper, this route will only frustrate you more.

First, reassurance, a big hug and no, I wouldn't waste time assigning blame to you I any of it, even if you said or did things that might have given him reasons to. Under any circumstances things like that should happen or escalate to that point. Minimizing judgement,seems like you were honest, direct and candid about running out of funds and about what you wanted to happen next, which I personally appreciate in people.
That said, the first thing that came to mind when I first read the part that I quotes was "welcome to dealing with gay men and their BS". I wish I could say that this is the first time that I've heard of men having a complete 180 over some type of relationship, not just a provider/client type. I've heard of and experienced myself similar stories of people going from 0 to 100 in a second over (sometimes) nothing. Of course, as you can see by the other guy, not all and not always things take that turn, but at least in my experience I have seen it happening way too many times.
Then there is the business aspect of it that cannot be neglected or pretend it didn't exist. What others have pointed out is true. You are paying for a fantasy, mostly sexual. That connection with men that you (and most-to-all of us) need might net be achieved with a person that you have to pay to give you company. You shouldn't expect a level of intimacy that you might need from  provider, or even friendship for that matter. What others are pointing out is true, that might be your contribution to the unsavory situation.
I'm sorry that this unsavory situation happened. Don't allow it to escalate. I'd just stop communication. Sometimes there's nothing that you can do or say that will make things better. It's ok to be angry, but don't act it up in unhealthy ways.
Best.

I've never seen a masseur directly express his appreciation to his customers in an open forum such as this.  Consider me a potential customer.  You must be a Blessing.  Keep up the positive great vibes!

Anyone familiar? He has such an interesting look to me
SweetBoyEugene - Male Escort, Gay massage - New York City | Rent.Men
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Welcome to the site!
As a new member you haven’t been around long enough to understand the reasons for our Guidelines. They came out of necessity. Just the other day the moderators had to remove a message that contained a provider’s real name and the location of his current job. Protecting one’s personal information can’t be ignored. 
Most members don’t see the violations because as soon as they’re seen or reported the moderators will take the necessary action. 

Any information on this young man?
https://rent.men/Loganalexanderr

We’ve all done it to one degree or another. Don’t beat yourself up about it, but do learn from your mistakes.
Feelings are ok. Losing grip on reality is not. It’s a fantasy. Nothing more, nothing less.
You have always been and will always be wrong when you think "a mutual thing" is developing. 
This really shouldn’t be a newsflash for you. Still, don’t let it ruin your fun. Learn to enjoy the fantasy.
What rooms? Where? Are you stalking him?
I hope I’m misreading this statement because it sounds creepy and unhealthy as fuck. 

 
You need to remember that this is a "hobby". It’s not real life. Don’t let your heart get involved. If you start developing real feelings for a provider, I suggest you disclose that to them immediately. Then stop seeing them. He may be fond of you. He may even "like" you. But in the words of Avenue Q, he doesn’t "like you, like you, like you like him". I know it hurts, and yes most if not all of us have had to go through the difficult phase you’re going through right now. The good news is, if you can learn to navigate it and stay in control of your emotions, this hobby can be damn fun. Like REAL fun. But if you need or want love, look somewhere else. You’re fishing in the wrong pond. 

Your comments are just fine. I too, will not provide explicit details. Personally, I always add “I recommend” or “I would not recommend”.  And yes, PM is always an option. 

These kinds of recommendations remind me of restaurant reviews in Middle America.
"Great place !
So much food !"

I search for good gay theme movies. I prefer the ones that have good story lines and characters. My favorites, so far, are "Latter Days", "Handsome Devil", and a few others I can not recall right now. I like romance with my gay movies. Latter Days is very good, imho.

I heard the same thing. Really enjoyed him in the movie Shelter. 

Chuck and nick are all Asian.  Two different guy.  Chuck is working at 27 and nick work at HK.   
 
After the VIP room in HK build up. I will re do the gallery.   I will put name on each picture so that it won’t be confusing.   ❤️.
and.  If you had any bad experiences or any suggestions. Please let me know. I am here for any issues❤️ 

It does. In his case, apart from a two or three line review in French, they are all one or two words, or at most a [positive] single line of text. The catch is, as has been discussed previously in the Forum, you need to be outside the US physically, or to use a VPN to appear to the RM site to be abroad, to read those written reviews.

I prefer "therapist."
There are already shrinks who get paid to hug their patients. Just a logical extrapolation. 

Perhaps we can try a subthread, as this topic is not disconnected from the OP's, and discuss the terminology used to refer to clients. I have some suggestions.
personal financial provider personal investor provided friend with financial benefits prostituter solicitor requester frequent rider/ride whorer escorted personal corruptor supporter admirer member of my fanfuck club partner in whoring hookering ally time-payer adjective+John (favorite John, stinky John, significant John, etc.) Venmo/Cashapp/Paypal partner

From now on, I am advocating for "geishas."

Great advice from everyone. It was an amazing experience and I lucked out having a provider who was fantastic for first timers. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have first time performance anxiety, but he was patient, kind, enthusiastic, and just drop dead gorgeous.
 
I'd book him again with zero hesitation, largely in part to the advice and perspective of you guys. I can't thank you all enough.