Escort terminology

[+ azdr0710]

the word "escort" is too wink-wink-nudge-nudge for me.....it smacks way too much of a secret term used decades ago to get around the law......but I know it has become very generic today and is used in mainstream media for both sexes, straight or gay......

 

lately, I've been using the word "provider" here in the forum instead of escort......I know it sounds like your doctor or insurance agent, but it's much more professional and respectful to me .....

 

"client" is a great word for the customer of a provider....."john", "trick" and all that is, of course, sleazy and dated-sounding.......

[gallahadesquire]

"Companion". Of course, that reflects on my Victorian sense of the encounter.

[Rudynate]

the word "escort" is too wink-wink-nudge-nudge for me.....it smacks way too much of a secret term used decades ago to get around the law......but I know it has become very generic today and is used in mainstream media for both sexes, straight or gay......

 

lately, I've been using the word "provider" here in the forum instead of escort......I know it sounds like your doctor or insurance agent, but it's much more professional and respectful to me .....

 

"client" is a great word for the customer of a provider....."john", "trick" and all that is, of course, sleazy and dated-sounding.......[/QUOTe]

 

 

I remember "escort" and "escort service" from mid-century films. Every once in a while, there would be reference to an escort service or an escort when a wealthy widow needed a man to accompany her to a charity ball, or such.

[gallahadesquire]

I remember "escort" and "escort service" from mid-century films. Every once in a while, there would be reference to an escort service or an escort when a wealthy widow needed a man to accompany her to a charity ball, or such.

Of course, one has to draw the line between escort and gigolo.

[Rudynate]

Of course, one has to draw the line between escort and gigolo.

 

I love books and films that involve gigolos.

[Guest Listen for the pop]

I love books and films that involve gigolos.

Forgive my ignorance; what is the distinction?

[Rudynate]

Forgive my ignorance; what is the distinction?

 

 

My understanding is that a gigolo gets paid to have sex with women. I find the notion of sex for hire incredibly erotic, but it's extra erotic when it involves a woman hiring a man. Dont ask me why, I couldnt tell you.

[Rudynate]

Of course, one has to draw the line between escort and gigolo.

 

At least in movies there was a distinction.

[Guest Listen for the pop]

At least in movies there was a distinction.

Gotcha!

[+ Gar1eth]

I don’t see that it really matters as long as you and the person in question are compatible with each other.

 

Gman

[+ GregM]

Escort or hooker I'm fine with and I've often used the term hooker. Both mean the same thing. First meeting I will probably refer to someone as a client. But anything more than a couple meetings it's moved beyond client. I'm not quite sure what to refer to someone who've I've seen mire than a couple times. Because after a couple times it feels more than I'm just a hole or cock (I'm ok if I am though lol) or a transaction. Idk I'll think of something.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[+ Gar1eth]

Escort or hooker I'm fine with and I've often used the term hooker. Both mean the same thing. First meeting I will probably refer to someone as a client. But anything more than a couple meetings it's moved beyond client. I'm not quite sure what to refer to someone who've I've seen mire than a couple times. Because after a couple times it feels more than I'm just a hole or cock (I'm ok if I am though lol) or a transaction. Idk I'll think of something.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

How about friendly acquaintance? I mean I don’t think friends should be charged. But in most cases would you really condescend to see someone repeatedly if you couldn’t stand him?

 

Gman

[+ GregM]

How about friendly acquaintance? I mean I don’t think friends should be charged. But in most cases would you really condescend to see someone repeatedly if you couldn’t stand him?

 

Gman

 

No I wouldn't see someone if I didn't like them. Acquaintance is ok but it sounds kind of distant.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[Beancounter]

I use the term provider as it’s both descriptive and non-offensive. For my repeat providers I usually go with “you’re my main squeeze”.

[+ MakeMeCowboy]

When does an escort cross over into being a hustler?

[gallahadesquire]

When does an escort cross over into being a hustler?

When his price drops below $50/hr?

[Rudynate]

When does an escort cross over into being a hustler?

 

Hustler is a pejorative term that us rarely used.

[Rudynate]

I was referring to a conversation about things I had read. It was a conversation of my sincere concern for his life, because of accounts I had read. The accounts I had read were more “clinical” and written in a limited third person format. I was really trying to better understand his life. I often speak without forethought as to how it can make a person feel. I do even worse when nervous, as in this case. Retrospectively, I guess the BFE he had prepared didn’t include such an inquiry. This was the first escort I have ever hired, and only the second time with him. I want to be better prepared the next time.

 

Was this some sort of intervention or rescue conversation? Are you certain you are the person to be having that conversation with this guy? You don't seem to know him well.

[Guest Listen for the pop]

I was just asking if he had friends and asking about his physical health. I was worrying about him getting drugged or jumped in a bad situation. I wasn’t trying to change him or tell him not to do anything. I just care about the people I let put things in various orifices of my body. The conversation was really moot and we both laughed a bit because he could physically fight of a small army.

[gallahadesquire]

More like an 1890s thing: https://www.etymonline.com/word/trick

 

Notes on “Trick”

trick, n.

from OFr. trichier, to trick, to cheat;

Pr. tric, deceit;

It. treccare, to cheat.

1. an action or device designed to deceive, swindle, etc.; artifice; a dodge; ruse; stratagem; deception.

2. a practical joke; a mischievous or playful act; prank.…

4. (a) a clever or difficult act intended to amuse … (b) any feat requiring skill.

5. the art, method, or process of doing something successfully or of getting a result quickly …

6. an expedient or convention of an art, craft, or trade …

7. a personal mannerism …

 

I have chosen these definitions, carefully selected from the Unabridged Second Edition of Webster’s Dictionary, on the basis of congeniality with what is perhaps the most current usage of the word

Trick

—that which refers to the object of one’s affectations. By “one” I mean the person of serious ambition in those fields most likely to necessitate the employment of a press agent. Such a person is often, but not always, a homosexual; the primary reason for this being that the heterosexual is far too burdened by his own young to be much interested in anyone else’s. Where the heterosexual

feels a sense of duty, a sense of honor, a sense of responsibility, the homosexual feels a sense of humor, a sense of protocol, and most significantly, a sense of design.

 

With no dependents, he is free to pursue his selfish interests—among these, the Trick. The Trick allows one a semblance of romantic intimacy without the risk that one’s own importance will be improperly appreciated.

 

The Trick exhibits those qualities found in a favorite toy. Surely, no sane person would if he could help it knowingly choose a doll that talked about progressive education and demanded that one share the housework—and it is precisely this ability to help it that separates the men from the toys.

 

Fortunately, there are many available to fill the role of Trick, since the first requirement of the climber is a toehold. In allowing this close proximity one is, indeed, apt to have one’s pocket picked, but one also has the option of causing a nasty spill. It is, therefore, a situation in which everyone concerned can be taken advantage of to the best of his ability. As to the question of who runs the greatest risk of getting hurt, one can only reply that the number of mountains that have suffered severe or fatal injury is infinitesimal when compared to the number who have tackled them.

 

The word Trick is used to describe the less illustrious member of such an alliance and it fills a genuine need. For the noteworthy partner the words Rich and/or Famous are quite sufficient, but the corresponding adjectives of Cute and/or Well-built are somewhat lacking. Actual names were all right for home use, but neither “Juan” nor “Heather” is really serviceable as a generic term.

 

Exactly when or why the word Trick was first used for this purpose is unclear, although there is a theory that it derives from the slang of prostitutes, who have long used it in regard to their clients. While this contention is not without logic it is far more likely that this use of the word Trick was spread by simple (or complex) word of mouth.

 

I have in the interest of clarification jotted down some notes on the subject, but before we proceed to them there are a few things that must be said:

 

Tricks like to lie in bed—also in restaurants.

 

* * *

 

Tricks should never be left strewn carelessly about the house where someone might trip over them.

 

* * *

 

Tricks are attracted to bright objects. This may elude your understanding since you obviously do not share this tendency.

 

These notes are for Lord Alfred Douglas.

 

1. It is wise to avoid the very young Trick. For while it is indeed true that they offer the advantage of having to leave early to get to school, it is equally true that the very same thing can be accomplished by the use of fashion models, who will not only have to be standing on top of the Pan Am Building in full makeup by 8 A.M. but who also will never need help with their term papers on John Donne.

 

2. The homosexual’s desire to remain youthful is entirely based on his knowledge that he will never have children and hence will be deprived of legitimately meeting their more attractive friends.

 

3. There are those for whom the most highly prized quality in a Trick is sheer stupidity. Of this group the most envied is an eminent film director who has installed in his residence a young man whose lips move when he watches television.

 

4. Random examples of items that are part of the canon of Trick:

 

Bennington College’s Nonresident Term

 

Conceptual art

 

Stealing

 

Trying on someone else’s leather jacket while he’s at work

 

Artistic greeting cards

 

Interesting food Black sheets

 

Remembering telephone numbers by making a word out of the corresponding letters

 

Trying to figure things out by listening to the lyrics of popular songs Exotic cigarettes

 

Reading, or more likely watching,

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

and identifying with Holly Golightly

 

Hearing about F. Scott Fitzgerald and thinking you’re Zelda

 

Being Zelda Fitzgerald and thinking you’re F. Scott

 

Lina Wertmüller movies seen without nausea

 

Stag movies seen with lust

 

5. A good Trick, like a good child, is mannerly. He does not speak unless spoken to, he does not contradict, and he kneels when an adult comes into the room.

 

“Still as interested as ever in the young, I see,” Francis remarked in a confidential undertone, glancing round the obstruction of his friend’s shoulders to where Daniel stood.… “You old succubus! Let’s have a look at your latest suffix!”

 

—The Apes of God

, Wyndham Lewis

 

6. Mixed company in the modern sense of the term means that Tricks are present. How often one has longed to be left alone after dinner while the Tricks go upstairs and take cocaine.

 

7. American industry has made a grave error in overlooking the Trick. The market is wide open and would be rewardingly receptive to such products as strawberry-swirl vodka, Hermès mittens, and a pack of cigarettes with a secret surprise inside.

 

8. Although the male Trick is more prone to stealing than is the female, neither sex can be trusted alone in the same room with an invitation to a party at Halston’s.

 

9. Tricks have feelings too, as they will be the first to tell you. If you prick them they do indeed bleed—usually your good vodka.

 

10. The Trick is, when it comes to finance, truly a child of the modern age, for he never carries cash—at least not his own.

 

11. Other people’s Tricks pose a special problem. Upon coming across a friend thus accompanied you must, out of politeness, treat the Trick amicably. This is invariably a mistake, for shortly thereafter the friend will divest himself of his consort and for the rest of your life the Trick will be coming up to you at parties and saying hello.

 

12. The simple black Trick is always appropriate—particularly at events where food is not served.

 

13. It is not unusual for the male aficionado to draw his Tricks exclusively from the lower orders. Such a person is, indeed, often attracted to the criminal element. When asked wherein lay the appeal, a spokesman for this group replied, “Everybody looks good when they’re under arrest.”

 

“Horace has always been like that—his intentions have

always

been strictly honourable” sneered Ratner “and he has never lost his belief in ‘genius’—associated

always

with extreme youth, and a pretty face! Unfortunately, the type of beauty which appeals to Horace you see is rather commonplace. The result is Horace has never actually met with a ‘genius,’ which is a pity. It might have opened his eyes if he had!”

 

—The Apes of God

, Wyndham Lewis

 

14. Should you be awakened in the middle of the night by a faint scratching sound, do not fear for your health unless you are certain that all valuables have been safely locked away. For it is far less likely that your Trick is suffering a communicable rash than that he is copying out your address book. The more vindictive among you may be interested in devising a phony version of said book in which you have carefully set down the phone numbers of particularly vile ex-Tricks next to the names of your most prestigious and least favorite former employers.

 

15. The mistreatment of Tricks is the revenge of the intelligent upon the beautiful.

Edited February 22, 2018 by gallahadesquire

[gallahadesquire]

Notes on Trick (cont'd)

 

16. Regrettably few Tricks are attractive enough to be allowed to discuss their innermost thoughts. Only those possessed of truly incredible cheekbones should ever be permitted to use the word

energy in a sentence unless they are referring to heating oil.

 

17. The Trick is not an equal but he is often an equalizer.

 

18. Occasionally a Trick will succeed so spectacularly that he will make the transition to person. When this occurs he will assume a truly amazing imperiousness of manner. People love to feel superior to their past.

 

19. Tricks almost always have pets. This is understandable, as everyone needs someone they can talk to on their own level.

 

20. Taking an emergency telephone call from a Dr. Juan or a Dr. Heather is certain to result in overinvolvement.

 

21. There is a distinct Trick taste in literature. Among favorite Trick books are those dealing with the quest for God, such as the words of Carlos Castaneda and Herman Hesse; those depicting a glamorous and torturous homosexuality, as in the case of Nightwood by Djuna Barnes; and those assuring Tricks that everything is fine and dandy, especially them. This sort of reading is generally harmless providing they have mastered the technique of reading quietly to themselves. For even the most hopelessly smitten will bridle at being awakened by Anaïs Nin.

 

22. When it comes to the visual arts a marked Trick preference is also evident. Work that falls into this category is easy to recognize, as the Trick is unfailingly attracted to that which looks as if he could (or did) make it himself.

 

23. Art movies on television are ideal for luring the reluctant Trick to one’s apartment. There are very few people who dabble in this field who have not seen the first twenty minutes of Loves of a Blonde more times than they care to count.

 

24. The Trick is, without fail, drawn to the interesting job. Interesting jobs, in this sense, include not only work in museum gift shops but also minor positions on the production crews of documentary films concerning birth defects.

 

25. The Trick, more often than not, will display an unconquerable bent for creativity. The East Coast Trick leans heavily toward the composition of free-verse poetry, while his West Coast counterpart goes in for song-writing. Tricks of all regions own expensive cameras with which they take swaggeringly grainy photographs of nearby planets and sensitive young drug addicts. This is not difficult to understand, as they are relentless admirers of that which they call art and you call hobbies.

 

“Can’t you see Dan that you are Horace’s plaything—When he talks about your ‘genius’—pulling your leg—that’s to get your ‘genius’!—

People always pull other people’s legs when they want to get hold of their genius!

 

—The Apes of God

, Wyndham Lewis

 

26. One man’s Trick is another man’s design assistant.

 

27. A New York hostess with a penchant for young boys gave a dinner at which a kind and fatherly magazine editor found himself seated across from her Trick. Seeking to put the boy at ease, the editor asked him politely what he did. “I’m an alchemist,” the boy replied. Overhearing the exchange, another guest whispered, “Alchemist? They used to be bank clerks.”

 

28. There is occasionally some question as to which member of a given duo is the Trick. This sort of confusion results when one (the elder) has money and the other (the younger) has talent. In such cases, and with all due respect to rising young luminaries, unless the money is exceedingly new and the talent exceedingly large, the money, as is its wont, wins. Or as was once said to a somewhat braggardly young artist while window-shopping at Porthaults, “If she has those sheets, you’re the Trick.”

 

29. Tricks like you for what they aren’t. You like Tricks for what you haven’t.

 

30. If one half of the couple is a waiter or waitress, he or she is always the Trick. Particularly, or in the case of New York City inevitably, if he or she has artistic ambitions. Such individuals may indeed traffic with those that they in turn refer to as Tricks, but that is a level of society far too submerged to be of any interest.

 

31. At public gatherings Tricks have been observed speaking to one another. What they actually say can only be a matter of conjecture but it is safe to assume that no money is changing hands.

 

32. The female Trick of great beauty can be readily identified by her habit of putting a cigarette in her mouth with an attitude of absolute assurance that someone else will light it.

 

33. It might appear to the casual observer that wives are Tricks. This betrays a sorry lack of perception, since no word as innately lighthearted as Trick could ever be used to describe someone with whom you share a joint checking account.

 

34. It is not good form to take a Trick out unless one is so firmly established as to be able to afford being associated with someone who might at any given moment write a poem in public.

 

35. Tricks are often plenteous gift givers. Upon receiving such offerings, one does well to forget old adages, for while it may certainly be true that good things come in small packages it must not be forgotten that this is also the case with ceramic jewelry.

 

36. Letters from female Tricks are immediately recognizable, as these girls are greatly inclined to cross their sevens and dot their i’s with little circles. In all probability this is caused by their associating the presence of a writing implement in their hand with the playing of tic-tac-toe.

“There is a Talmudic saying,” smiled Dr. Frumpfausen … “as follows. In choosing a friend, ascend a step. In choosing a wife, descend a step. When Froggie-would-a-wooing-go, when Froggie is you, my dear boy, he must step

down

, as many steps as there are beneath him—even unto the last!…”

 

—The Apes of God

 

Wyndham Lewis

 

37. Tricks are distinctly susceptible to the allure of faraway places. If you reside in the Village they want to breakfast at the Plaza. If you live in Murray Hill it’s Chinatown they long for. But no matter where you make your home, they all share a consuming desire to ride, in the middle of the night, the Staten Island Ferry. They will, without exception, consider your rejection of such a proposal cold and unfeeling, little realizing that you are simply protecting them from what you know would be overwhelming temptation were you ever to find yourself standing behind them on a moving boat.

 

• from Metropolitan Life, "Notes on Trick," by Fran Lebowitz
  

[BlakeBenz]

In my personal vocabulary, you’re a trick. I started as a stripper and that’s just what we call you.. at least with my HP’s (hoe partners). Some people find offense to that so to your face, and on this forum I will call you a client. I just feel it sounds more professional anyways.

 

An escort finding offense to the word sex worker? They must be in denial or ashamed of what they’re doing. Sex work is an umbrella term I feel covers all areas of the industry. Porn, escorting, dancing, sugaring, cam models, phone sex operators, and even those bikini baristas.

 

Escort, hoe, prostitute, provider... call me anything you want just DONT call me a HOOKER. I hate that word so much. It’s cringey and trashy and to me a hooker is the equivalent of a blade hoe. If you don’t know what The Blade is... pretty much every city has one. Here in Houston, it’s bissonette. Portland Oregon, it’s SE 82nd, and in Seattle it is Aurora. Those are the girls and boys walking the street doing things for 20-80$. Survival sex work. The bottom end of the escort pyramid.

[+ Pensant]

In my personal vocabulary, you’re a trick. I started as a stripper and that’s just what we call you.. at least with my HP’s (hoe partners). Some people find offense to that so to your face, and on this forum I will call you a client. I just feel it sounds more professional anyways.

 

An escort finding offense to the word sex worker? They must be in denial or ashamed of what they’re doing. Sex work is an umbrella term I feel covers all areas of the industry. Porn, escorting, dancing, sugaring, cam models, phone sex operators, and even those bikini baristas.

 

Escort, hoe, prostitute, provider... call me anything you want just DONT call me a HOOKER. I hate that word so much. It’s cringey and trashy and to me a hooker is the equivalent of a blade hoe. If you don’t know what The Blade is... pretty much every city has one. Here in Houston, it’s bissonette. Portland Oregon, it’s SE 82nd, and in Seattle it is Aurora. Those are the girls and boys walking the street doing things for 20-80$. Survival sex work. The bottom end of the escort pyramid.

I agree. Hooker is demeaning to the provider as well as the client.

[Nickf66]

This has probably been asked before - true story. College frat bro of mine, many years ago, was named Harold Franklin Hooker. He endured lots of awful jokes. Frequently asked, “Why don’t you change your name?” And his classic response was always something like, “I happen to like the name ‘Harold’ ...

[Cyd_StVincent]

Sex worker is a term coined by Carol Leigh - the Scarlet Harlot - in the 70's as a way to politically ground the growing prostitutes rights movement. Since then it has become widely used internationally in both advocacy and health contexts, and I think is the word that the AP is supposed to use. I like the word and use it to refer to myself in what I do, but I wouldn't expect it to be used within my interactions with clients necessarily. Since I have no qualms about what I do, I have no concerns with what I'm called as long as the tone it is said in is respectful.

 

As a side note I do wish perhaps that clients and sex workers did perhaps bring a little bit of the politics of prostitution into their meetings. We are both experiencing a huge wave of criminalization together, and we are natural partners in fighting it. However, it always feels like a taboo subject to bring up. I suppose it isn't the hottest thing when the clock is running, but I wonder when and where we develop the relationships necessary to build solidarity together. Otherwise its just going to be sex workers who are out advocating against their own criminalization and the criminalization of clients second.