Preferred method - declining

[Larstrup]

My preferred rejection from an escort is their silence. I do not dwell upon, nor do I require, a stranger whom I've never met, to deny me who I am.

[LaffingBear]

This has been very interesting. Thanks to all respondents.

[rvwnsd]

Sorry for being late to the party, but I was working all day.

 

Like @azdr0710, I think "thanks for your inquiry but I don't think we are a match" is truly the way to go. If you make up a little white lie you open yourself up to a future inquiry.

 

In regards to the question/statement someone made about actually being rejected, other than an escort being unavailable, ill, etc I've only been rejected twice. The first time the escort checked "versatile" when he intended to check "bottom." After he changed his profile he asked me to validate the preference had been changed. I did and we both moved on. The second time the escort said, "I don't think we are a match." I moved on.

 

When I'm interested in hiring someone but lose interest based on an email exchange or phone conversation I tell him that, based on our exchange/conversation it seems we are not a good match. It has only happened a couple of times and in the end, I felt better for being honest.

[rocky]

I might be the different one, that's not unusual. As someone who reaches out for companionship of others, I'm very upfront,; hey I'm 63; 250 pounds, not well endowed but want to have some fun and will make it worth your while. If the person doesn't respond and is out there in let's say men4rent or some other place, I'm pissed. I would prefer to have someone respond, thanks for your details, but prefer not to meet (and if they have someone who might be interested that would be fine too). I'm too old for being skin thin skinned, and obviously at my size I'm not, but prefer being told upfront, as I do.

[bostonman]

Man that certainly is a baby.

 

Breathtaking.

 

[SuperJunior]

My preferred rejection from an escort is their silence. I do not dwell upon, nor do I require, a stranger whom I've never met, to deny me who I am.

 

"Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another"!

[TopTierTop]

There have been many posts about communications, follow-up, texting, etc.

 

I'm curious if my attitude is same, or different from others'. So:

 

Clients: would you prefer an escort/masseur communicate "sorry, I dont care to see you." or some similar polite rejection? Or that he simply doesn't respond or stops communicating?

Escorts: what's your preference for rejecting a potential client, or a repeat? Politely tell them "no" or just don't respond/don't answer?

I politely say it won't be a good match if it is a potential client. Just not responding at all is something I have never done.

[Cannon]

I usually respond because in my experience, If I dont respond, then they will try again. So, if its a potential client that Im rejecting then I usually say, "Unfortunately, I don't believe we are a match but have fun, and be safe!".

[AdamSmith]

Extraordinarily bizarre thread.

 

Any of these beautiful guys advertising 'Call Now'...!

 

http://raleigh.backpage.com/MenSeekMen/

 

...are all 100% genuine, present, available. The smorgasbord is infinite!

 

I (even being me! ) have only managed to sample 001.1% of all this physical & spiritual beauty.

[LADoug1]

I politely say it won't be a good match if it is a potential client. Just not responding at all is something I have never done.

What would you do if the client asked why?

[LADoug1]

Another twist: after seeing an escort once they say you aren't a good match for another appointment? How would clients like to be told? How would escorts handle it? I for one would probably want to know why.

[TopTierTop]

What would you do if the client asked why?

Well, if the reason is something that I think would be too difficult to say without being insulting, I would just keep it very vague. But if let's say he he 6'5" and 250#, I would just say that with the style of what I do, I would feel uncomfortable or awkward with the size difference. I have declined clients because I felt they were too old or too young to be a good match, and what I say is that I don't think it will work with the "age difference." I never say "you are too old," because it is all relative. It would be just as true for me to say that I feel that I am too young to play that role for him.

 

The age thing makes a lot of guys in here totally nuts whenever I mention it, but they would be surprised to know that the vast majority of clients I decline because of age are between 22 and 35. Lately though, if my concern is that he is too many years older than me or I feel I am too small for them, what has worked really well is to meet the guy in person for a coffee and a chat to see if despite their stats there is some chemistry. Often there is. If he can't or won't do that than I am back to "I don't think we would be a good match."

[TopTierTop]

Another twist: after seeing an escort once they say you aren't a good match for another appointment? How would clients like to be told? How would escorts handle it? I for one would probably want to know why.

Honestly, what I do is just not contact him again and hope he doesn't contact me. Thank goodness this situation has been extremely rare, because I don't really have a good way to tell a client I have already met that I don't want to meet him again. I can tell you though, that every client I do meet more than once, I want to see again. If I don't, one way or another I find a way out of it.

[mike carey]

Rico, I won't agree loudly as I'll be accused of being your promoter, and I'm not that, but what you say makes perfect sense. (I thought of trying to work 'curiousity' into the post but that would be silly of me.)

[Rudynate]

What about the reverse? Are escorts never rejected? What if a client needs to communicate that he's really more into hairy hulks rather than trim twinks?

 

 

The magic words . . ."We're not a match."

[TopTierTop]

What about the reverse? Are escorts never rejected? What if a client needs to communicate that he's really more into hairy hulks rather than trim twinks?

Considering that my profile on RM gets countless views but I don't have countless clients, I assume that I am rejected more often than not. So far nobody has ever sent me a message though just to say that he is not into me. I would imagine an escort is rejected 100s or thousands of times more often than a client.

[mike carey]

Viewing a profile and not addressing them, and rejecting its owner are separate things. I view and decide Yum but I won't call all the time, but I don't leave a track, as it were.

Considering that my profile on RM gets countless views but I don't have countless clients, I assume that I am rejected more often than not.

On the other hand, I've looked at your profile more than once, Rico, but I don't have my views open. I look when you say you've changed something, and occasionally for no other reason than you've been chatting in the forum. I certainly haven't rejected you (although you may have done that to me, I'm not asking that question) and I still love chatting with you in here. I hope to continue to chat.

[TopTierTop]

Viewing a profile and not addressing them, and rejecting its owner are separate things. I view and decide Yum but I won't call all the time, but I don't leave a track, as it were.

 

On the other hand, I've looked at your profile more than once, Rico, but I don't have my views open. I look when you say you've changed something, and occasionally for no other reason than you've been chatting in the forum. I certainly haven't rejected you (although you may have done that to me, I'm not asking that question) and I still love chatting with you in here. I hope to continue to chat.

Well, I definitely hope so too, Mike!

[Deadlift1]

Extraordinarily bizarre thread.

 

Any of these beautiful guys advertising 'Call Now'...!

 

http://raleigh.backpage.com/MenSeekMen/

 

...are all 100% genuine, present, available. The smorgasbord is infinite!

 

I (even being me! ) have only managed to sample 001.1% of all this physical & spiritual beauty.

Did you take a look at Julian, the brazilian model in the football gear? holy schmoly!

[Deadlift1]

What would you do if the client asked why?

Block him.

[Rudynate]

Viewing a profile and not addressing them, and rejecting its owner are separate things. I view and decide Yum but I won't call all the time, but I don't leave a track, as it were.

 

On the other hand, I've looked at your profile more than once, Rico, but I don't have my views open. I look when you say you've changed something, and occasionally for no other reason than you've been chatting in the forum. I certainly haven't rejected you (although you may have done that to me, I'm not asking that question) and I still love chatting with you in here. I hope to continue to chat.

 

Nonetheless, it is a rational way of relating to evidence of his impact in the marketplace, reminding himself that he can't be all things to all clients and that there's nothing wrong with that.

[TopTierTop]

Block him.

The only time I block someone is if they say something rude or nasty. I have blocked guys on RM and from being able to call or send messages to my phone. If the tone gets unpleasant at all, it's an immediate block everywhere they can find me. The only place I don't block rude guys is on here. On here, I just respond in the gentlest way possible and refuse to go negative. Kind of ironic, since guys are much more likely to jump to negative conclusions and be rude on here than anywhere else I communicate with potential clients. But too many guys I like on here for me to just stop participating.

[+ MostlyLurking]

If I am given a reasonably direct refusal, even if it is hurtful, I will move on with closure. When I get explanations or excuses which sound half baked and less than truthful, my nature is not to let it go until I feel as though I have gotten a reasonable answer. White lies only prolong the interaction. If someone says they have the flu, well I might call in a few days to see how they are doing. If they say, I have no interest in seeing me, well there seems little need to call.

No answer at all is not professional and if you have met the escort in the past, it is disrespectful.

 

I always assume I am being told the truth. So if an escort says he has a cold, I conclude he has a cold, and I will definitely try again. If you don't answer, I'll be a little disappointed. If you tell me I'm too old, I'll be hurt but I'll get over it. If you lie to me and I find out, I will still get over it - but I will be more hurt, and sad as well.

 

If you assume you're being told the truth, you'll be disappointed. But if you question everything you're told, you live in an unnecessarily hostile world and are sure to miss many blessings.

[mike carey]

Kind of ironic, since guys are much more likely to jump to negative conclusions and be rude on here than anywhere else I communicate with potential clients. But too many guys I like on here for me to just stop participating.

On here there is a difference. Unless people are corresponding in PMs, the correspondence here is public, everyone in the forum sees it. That is radically different from any site where your interactions are just between the two of you. For every person who would condemn you there is someone (usually more than one) who will defend you. Please stay!

[TopTierTop]

On here there is a difference. Unless people are corresponding in PMs, the correspondence here is public, everyone in the forum sees it. That is radically different from any site where your interactions are just between the two of you. For every person who would condemn you there is someone (usually more than one) who will defend you. Please stay!

I don't plan to go anywhere. The fact that some people jump to negative conclusions and are quick to judge without all the facts or knowing the person they are talking to/about are not just problems in here. It seems to just be part of human nature. It mostly just makes me feel disappointed that there is so much hostility in this world.