Do You Submit or Tell Stats Prior to Meeting Escorts?

[+ Gar1eth]

I do not volunteer anything. Confidence is sexy, "apologizing" for your appearance is not.

 

I don't expect most escorts to think I'm sexy-although @Mikegaite professes to like bears. And judging from his actions he either really does or has the acting chops to make Sir Laurence Olivier send up a white flag embossed with the words, "I'm not worthy."

 

I am very proud of my stats. I worked hard for them - gym, healthy life style and so on. So yes, I always provide them right away.

 

 

Ahh it's interesting how diametrically opposed feelings can leads to similar result. I used to provide my stats because I am in no way proud of them. And as professional as most escorts are, I understand totally if they just can't perform satisfactorily with a client possessing my stats. While I realize we expect escorts to act professionally with their clients, there's a world of difference in the level of intimacy required between, say, an accountant doing your taxes and an escort 'doing you'. Escorting is a field where I've always felt that the personal likes and prejudices of the escort have to be taken into account. Not everyone likes to hear that but escorting is not like other professions.

 

I also am in favor of mental health therapists who are prejudiced against gay lifestyles being able to refuse patients although I realize they may have to see the patient in the interim until care can be transferred.

 

As for revealing my likes and peccadilloes-and gosh I surely like a nice set of pecs, I think it's only natural. In general, why would I as a fairly vanilla guy, want to unknowingly hire a kink escort who hates vanilla ice cream-like encounters?

 

Gman

[stop]

I always share my stats and I usually send a pic so they know who I am when I show up. I also have a profile/pics on my RM profile. I feel better disclosing my HIV status upfront vs. in person, easier and now just habit for me.

 

Funny thing happened to me about 6 months ago with a pro that posts occasionally on this site frequently and I don't mind calling him out indirectly because he was a dick, but I sent him a pic and his response was "why the fuk doo u thk i wanna pic ofu ur pying me so i dont care what u look like its not like i am doing this on my own" (I have pulled this directly from our text exchange typos and all.

 

So I didn't actually meet up with him. No I am not disclosing who it was if he wants to speak up he can. We had an exchange after that which went south even further when he tried to clarify what he meant. The subsequent texts made me feel pretty shitty about myself so I have that...

 

Generally I get a good response to my photo, and this one bad time has been the exception.

[BabyBoomer]

"why the fuk doo u thk i wanna pic ofu ur pying me so i dont care what u look like its not like i am doing this on my own"

 

Hmmmmmm.....

 

~ Boomer ~

[MikeyGMin]

"why the fuk doo u thk i wanna pic ofu ur pying me so i dont care what u look like its not like i am doing this on my own"

 

It's like walking a mine field sometimes. You never know what is going to set someone off, but there would be no coming back from a statement like that. I can kind of imagine what the explanation was, but the delivery is inexcusable. There are a dozen nice ways he could have said that a picture is not required.

[Epigonos]

I have ALWAYS provided the following stats: age, height, weight, general physical condition, sexual likes, sexual dislikes, and general likes and dislikes. I then tell the escorts that if none of these stats are a problem to let me know and we will proceed with setting up a get together. I'm 76 years old and I don't like surprises like ending up with an escort who is an ageist.

[BasketBaller]

Yeah , there's a huge difference between "I don't need a picture" and "i don't care what u look like." That would have been the end of the conversation for me. �

[coriolis888]

Men, I hesitated as well as debated in beginning this thread, for I am still torn after almost two decades in engaging the services of escorts. Whenever I've hired an escort-- I've contacted him principally via email or a telephone ring and have asked about his availability and perhaps a few other things."

 

The enjoyment you experienced over "almost two decades" will not last forever.

 

"Recently, I've engaged the services of two very, very hot men. Upon my joining each one, I've been quite disappointed in their reluctance to play and satisfy and collect their fee honestly. After the hour that I've spent with each one, I've been left feeling quite disappointed, perplexed, upset, and saddened, and feeling that I've been taken for over $250 in each case. Previously, during all of these years, when I've hired, in the majority of cases, all of the men have given me what I've desired and then some."

 

"But today I write this thread to ask if you always volunteer your stats along with letting them know how you desire "play?" I'm baffled, for I have rarely had a poor session with a guy during all of these years!"

 

There comes a time when people physically change. Certain changes are disconcerting to some escorts. This may or may not be the reason for your two most current escort disappointments. I mention this only as a possibilty for your two bad encounters.

 

"This inquiring mind wants to know, for he has been let down "big time" during his last two meeting with two gorgeous men, men who I thought would connect and render to me what I desired. Yes, I am quite aware of chemistry, but since I have rarely had a poor connection, I envisioned and thought that I'd be left with many "after glows," but as written in the aforementioned, I did not in these cases?"

 

Even if we furnish what we believe are honest stats to escorts, no matter how professional they profess to be, some escorts cannot perform with certain clients. It is merely a fact of life.

 

While it is true that escorts say they do not care what a client looks like, I have serious doubts that is 100% true. Physiological changes cannot be ignored even by the most talented escort.

 

On the other hand, it could be that you just had two unfortunate dudes who looked good, but performed poorly.

 

When I read your recount of the last two sad experiences you had described having with escorts, I thought of the Scotish poet, Robert Burns where he wrote:

 

"And would some Power give us the gift

To see ourselves as others see us!

It would from many a blunder free us,

And foolish notion:

What airs in dress and gait would leave us,

And even devotion!

 

 

Please don't take this response as offensive. Rather, it is merely something to consider as the reason for the lack of performance by two different escorts. Who knows, your next encounter might be a wonderful blast.

 

"click to expand" above to read my responses to your post -

[+ Gar1eth]

Please don't take this response as offensive. Rather, it is merely something to consider as the reason for the lack of performance by two different escorts. Who knows, your next encounter might be a wonderful blast.

 

"click to expand" above to read my responses to your post -

Didn't Burns actually write---

 

O wad some Power the giftie gie us

To see oursels as ithers see us!

It wad frae mony a blunder free us,

An' foolish notion:

What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,

An' ev'n devotion!

 

 

Gman

[coriolis888]

Didn't Burns actually write---

 

O wad some Power the giftie gie us

To see oursels as ithers see us!

It wad frae mony a blunder free us,

An' foolish notion:

What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,

An' ev'n devotion!

 

 

Gman

Yes, he did.

 

However, he was Scottish and wrote in his dialect of the time. Today, few people would understand what he wrote or said. Therefore, there was a Standard English translation made of his poem which you can find here along with his original poem:

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_a_Louse

[WolfRamNHard]

Just wanted to stay that I'm really enjoying this thread. It's interesting and enlightening to hear how others approach the initial encounter and their reasons for why they do so.

 

Just goes to show that anything and everything can be a learning experience in its own way.

[wearytraveller]

When I contact and hire by email I give my approximate, age, height, weight, race and general look. I let them know what I'm looking for and what I'm not looking for. I'm contacting them, so it's clear I'm interested ... what I want to know is if they're interested. Besides, I figure fair is fair ... if their ad and pictures are accurate, I know what I'm in for, it seems only fair that they have some idea what they're in for. What I've come to realize is that I learn a great a deal from the type of response I get and I (and probably the potential companion) have saved valuable time because of their response.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Yes, he did.

 

However, he was Scottish and wrote in his dialect of the time. Today, few people would understand what he wrote or said. Therefore, there was a Standard English translation made of his poem which you can find here along with his original poem:

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_a_Louse

Thank you for the translation, I needed it. Beautiful, relevant poem.

[jjkrkwood]

I always Give ALL my stats.....I think they need to know ?

 

http://arhivach.org/a_cimg/?h=b89da1bf71ad50e67b4623d7c942ff5b&.jpg

[Juan Vancouver]

http://arhivach.org/a_cimg/?h=b89da1bf71ad50e67b4623d7c942ff5b&.jpg

 

 

That is so fucking wrong it made me shiver!

 

The white flower clashes with the pink panties. Even if the pearls are in between both colours.

 

Fix it!

[jjkrkwood]

That is so fucking wrong it made me shiver!

 

The white flower clashes with the pink panties. Even if the pearls are in between both colours.

 

Fix it!

 

Juan, you are obviously Old school matchey-matchey.... I like to MIX it up !

[Juan Vancouver]

Juan, you are obviously Old school matchey-matchey.... I like to MIX it up !

 

I thought you were only into sucking huge cocks and occasionally rimming a good ass... that doesn't sound like mixing it up!

[jjkrkwood]

I thought you were only into sucking huge cocks and occasionally rimming a good ass... that doesn't sound like mixing it up!

 

 

We were talking FASHSHON'

[gezellig4u]

I don't volunteer my stats up front, and have actually only been asked once in 15+ years. On that occasion, I reluctantly provided my stats (of which I am not ashamed; I am HWP and thankfully look a few years younger than my actual age), but eventually had to declare the date a no-go as he had too many additional requirements (e.g., he had to be picked up & returned either by me personally or by a car service - and lived waaaaaay out from the center of the city where I was staying; you get the idea). I also prefer to maintain my own visual recognition anonymity until I am absolutely certain that the person that I am meeting is indeed the person that arrives. As I have mentioned before, I always insist that the first meeting occur in public. That is usually the hotel lobby or a coffee shop. Fortunately, I have never had to abort a date, nor have I had anyone run screaming into the street or pull a no-show. Of course, my own vetting requirements and initial meeting "policies" have resulted in many (most?) guys being ruled out, often before any extensive communication, but this is what works for me (and everyone's mileage will vary).

[gezellig4u]

There are a dozen nice ways he could have said that a picture is not required.

Or, as my mother was fond of saying, sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all.

[pubic_assistance]

I think in the world of online communications, including some basic stats: Age, height, weight, build, sexual interests helps a professional connect with you as another human being from the first message.

[dlee02]

That is so fucking wrong it made me shiver!

 

The white flower clashes with the pink panties. Even if the pearls are in between both colours.

 

Fix it!

 

The drapes didn't match the carpet! *GASP*

 

[+ glennnn]

I tend to hire escorts who welcome "Mature" men in their profiles, so I don't include specific stats on my body, just that I am in good shape for 73 and in good health. I become specific about my sexual requirements as our communication proceeds. Kissing, hugging and his cumming are essential for me. I have sent a photo once just for fun. I'm batting 1000 so far after 8 times at the plate.

[Strafe13]

I have a related point, where things may have gone south with a supremely highly reviewed escort whom I've wanted to meet for years. I'll be traveling to a different part of the country this fall, and since it's near this escort's area, I texted him about setting something up. He presented as very polite, and even enthusiastic about meeting, and we seemed to hit it off really well. We even noted that we seemed to have a great connection, which was a sign of great things to come. After we agreed on a multiple hour appointment on a specific date (with the option for me to extend the session), I booked my flights. I then asked if he'd like to know anything about me, and he asked for a description of my looks and romantic interests. I provided that (although without explicit stats), and it's been abrupt radio silence since then. We had texted back and forth many times over the course of a day or so, and that happened to be during a pretty frequent exchange, so the silence after my description seems out of place, as I expected at least a reply as to whether he thought he could provide the experience I'm looking for.

 

I'm now trying to figure out if I do, or don't, have an actual appointment, and, if not, then the reason. I disclosed that I'm a big guy, but many of his reviews are from self-described larger or chubby men, so that can't be it. My rather vanilla interests align with those expressed by his reviewers, and we're compatible with respect to sexual positions (he's top, I'm bottom). Although I forgot to tell him my age (late 30s, by the way), I did mention that I'm black (this is a white escort). Now I'm wondering if that's why I haven't heard a peep since then. I followed up many hours after that with a generic request for his opinion on lodging in his area, but still no response. I have no way to know what's going on, and I hate that we live in a world where this even has to be a legitimate concern, but I can't help but wonder if this guy just assumed that I was white, and freaked when he learned otherwise. I prefer to think it's just that something unexpected came up, or maybe a broken phone, but I also don't want to come across as too persistent or needy, so I haven't sent a second follow-up text. This is why I generally am wary of escorts asking for a description, and why I never offer it, but since I seemed to have a good rapport with this guy, I took a leap of faith. I hope this doesn't turn out to be a bad lesson.

[Juan Vancouver]

This is why I generally am wary of escorts asking for a description, and why I never offer it, but since I seemed to have a good rapport with this guy, I took a leap of faith. I hope this doesn't turn out to be a bad lesson.

 

It would occur to me that this would be the perfect reason to do exactly the opposite. If you are afraid that potential partners might react negatively to anything about you that you cannot hide (race, weight, disabilities come to mind right away) then it is in your best interest to share this information with them right off the bat... especially before booking air tickets!

 

I am so sorry that you are going through this, but I would see it as a great lesson, not a bad one. I hope that you start to see that by sharing the whole enchilada from the very beginning you will weed the assholes from the fun guys. Otherwise if you keep having the feeling that you are going to ambush them when they show up and fear their reaction but hope that -because he was polite on the phone- everything is going to go well.... well, you will find that sometimes things will go horribly wrong. He will not be able to show his discomfort, he will be an asshole, you would have had airfare booked, he won't be able to perform, he will treat you badly...

 

Alert those fucking racist assholes right off the bat. Your hiring pool might become smaller, but you will not be exposed to their hate.

 

Take care of yourself. Love yourself. Don't put yourself in such uncomfortable situations.

[big-n-tall]

About a month ago, a guy I wanted to see (who lives cross country) didn't ask for a physical decription, but wanted pics. He said it wasn't necessary to show my face or privates. I wasn't comfortable with the request. So we didn't meet. If he had asked for a physical description I would have been fine with that.

 

Only two guys (that I can recall) asked me for a face pic before meeting. However, that's after long conversations back and forth. By the time they asked for a pic we were pretty damned well acquainted. They knew a lot about me and I them... the only thing being they had no clue what I looked like. There have been a few who asked me for a physical decription, but only after talking a bit. I usually only get asked what am I into.

 

This past Tuesday, the guy who wanted my body pic randomly texts me asking am I ready to send the pics, explaining he has safe guards, etc., etc. I don't know what to make of it because I made no further contact after he made clear no pics, no meet up. I won't be meeting him anytime soon.