When a Regular Retires

[+ purplekow]

I have been hiring long enough that several of the men I hired regularly have moved on (Parker Williams, Nick German, Rick Hammersmith, Rod Roddick, EthanNJ, Sean Knight) or moved away. With the retirement of Chris Eisenhower and Alec Andrews, I imagine that some of their regulars will be looking for new adventures. Now I hire two escorts who I see regularly, but i feel as though when these two have retired, my options will be severely limited

I have gotten 10 years older, but the average age of an escort has stayed the same and I have sampled most of the well respected escorts who are working now.

So guys, how do you fill the gap when a favorite, regular retires?

[+ sf westcoaster]

Sadly, I hired less frequently.

[Becket]

I spend a lot of time moping around. It is kinda like a death; clearly a loss one has to absorb. I'm another who sticks with the same few guys. I still miss one fellow who retired almost two years ago. I send him Christmas cards and try to keep in touch now and again, but he really has moved on. I'm part of the "life" he doesn't have anymore, so I guess he has no reason, or desire, to stay in contact. It's tough, Mr Kow. I started this silly hobby some fifteen years ago just to have more sex in my life. Now the sex is not all that important. The intimacy is what I crave. And I don't get that unless I invest a whole lot of time getting to know someone. When that someone retires, it sucks. I'll tell you, when my next regular hangs 'em up I'm gonna be a basket case. It will require hours of mouth to mouth resuscitation from Messrs. Baldwin, Steele, Andrews, Irons, & Adams, et al.

[mike carey]

I don't yet have a regular to whom this conversation would apply, but I have seen escorts retire. If I wanted to keep in touch with them under the new ground rules that their retirement brings I would tell them that. More often than not I would expect them to move on and would grieve a little for my loss but respect their decision. There are other men who can fill the escort niche they once occupied but that is not the same as taking up their place in my life. Of course, escorts are not the only people who leave, creating a gap in our lives, but dealing with it is our problem, not theirs.

[+ purplekow]

Of the six I mentioned above, three I have regular contact with three ither by text, phone or in person, no sex. Two I do not have contact with in any meaningful way. One has passed on. He and I had a very close relationship and I expect we would still be friends had he lived.

[gallahadesquire]

I had one multiple-year regular. We first met in a chatroom on AOL, and finally met in person five years later. We met yearly for almost five years. Our last meeting was sub-optimal; he was essentially non-interactive.

 

Three months later I began a three-and-a-half month hospitalization. He and I still keep in touch, but infrequently (think Facebook).

[marylander1940]

I have been hiring long enough that several of the men I hired regularly have moved on (Parker Williams, Nick German, Rick Hammersmith, Rod Roddick, EthanNJ, Sean Knight) or moved away. With the retirement of Chris Eisenhower and Alec Andrews, I imagine that some of their regulars will be looking for new adventures. Now I hire two escorts who I see regularly, but i feel as though when these two have retired, my options will be severely limited

I have gotten 10 years older, but the average age of an escort has stayed the same and I have sampled most of the well respected escorts who are working now.

So guys, how do you fill the gap when a favorite, regular retires?

 

Keep the friendship (if he became your friend) or wish them well and move on.

[TruthBTold]

I had that happen. No one has mentioned (but it probably is the case) when we were seeing each other we would do some "non-sex"stuff, e.g., movies, concerts, meeting the family, so there were things to build on after things wound down. The funny thing was that I urged him to go to school to get a position so that he could retire from the business. Which he did. But I can't say my desire ended when totally when that did.

[big-n-tall]

It's a sad thing, especially if the parties involved have grown close (to whatever degree). Even more so when contact is abruptly stopped. I've been lucky in that majority of the guys who I have known, who have retired (which isn't a lot), I am still in contact with.

 

To DK's comment, I was actually surprised that one of said retirees (while he was still escorting) contacted me one day just to wish me happy anniversary. I asked him, "what for?". It was the one year anniversary of when we first met. He and I have an extremely close relationship still and it's been a few years since he has retired. I know this isn't the norm, but it's a nice occurrence when it happens.

 

To PK, to everyone, you'll find some to supplement your loss I'm sure. Like they say people come into your life for a reason or a season. I'm paraphrasing folks, don't shoot me.

[Racketjock]

It has happened to me twice: Michael - FT.Meyers and AndrewD. I miss them both tremendously, think of them often, and wish them nothing but the best in the lives they now lead. I have had some fun times with others, but sadly none that have led me to frequent continued appointments and overnights (due to a variety of reasons on their parts or my own).

[whipped guy]

Well, when I first hired it was a BDSM specialist who was the most knowledgeable person in that regard that anyone would have been privileged to meet. As such, I considered him to be a mentor and teacher who happened to be an escort. Accordingly, he was virtually my exclusive go to guy for three years except when he was traveling and was out of the area. I will never forget the day that he sent me an email informing me of his retirement. I am really a very stable person, but it probably was the closest that I ever came to wanting to seek some sort of therapy. Incidentally like Alec Andrews, he had a plan and when his goals were realized he decided that it was time to move on. The really smart ones always have a plan.

 

Since then guys have come and gone and several are mentioned by the OP. I still feel a sense of loss when it happens. All I can say is that if anyone is totally special, and at least one of the six that PK mentions was indeed a cut above the average simply as a person, go for it and enjoy to the max while the going is good! The special ones are few and far between. As of now I also crave just a couple of guys and given my new situation the logistics of hiring are a bit more complicated as the area when I am spending the most time is not exactly an area that is often visited. Luckily one guy does pass through from time to time.

 

To get back to the original question of how to fill the gap? Fortunately there are the memories! Still at times one needs to take matters into one's own hands...

[flguy]

Michael was a great guy and pretty good friend and when he moved on there has been only a couple that could fill his void. Honest, sweet, lovable, kind and talented.....what's not to like.

[+ dutchmuch]

[down_to_business]

I find myself hiring a lot less often, but I remain open to possibly filling the void. For me it is not like the guys are interchangeable pieces of Legos. I am not a person who trusts easily (my genetic makeup compounded by life-experience and it didn't help getting blackmailed by an escort along the way), so it takes me and my companion a whole lot of work to reach that mutual level of trust and acceptance where I am comfortable inviting him into my home, sharing part of my life, or even vacationing for an extended period of time with a new escort.

 

Not that it can't be some fun auditioning "unsuccessful" new talent along the way

[Epigonos]

It has happened to me only once. Todd/LA used to drive to my place and I would cook dinner for the two of us. I always prepared way too much food so he could take the left overs home. He always reminded me of a rambunctious puppy when it came to sexual play. He retired suddenly when his boyfriend found out that he was escorting. Around the first of every year I send him a greeting to his old email address. The email doesn't bounce back so I assume he receives it but he never responds. My only hope is that he is happy and that his life is going well.

[BaronArtz]

I did see 'Muscle Stud Boy' a.k.a. 'Oliver' 3-4 times a week, for almost a year. He retired as an escort, thanks to my financial and moral support. We went on trips together. I met his mom and dad - the only client who ever did. They loved me. He said we would conquer the world together. Then, he wanted a committed relationship with a woman. He felt he couldn't date women if I was still involved. He ended it abruptly. After the break-up, he was still consulting me on nutrition - but only via email, never in person. It was atrociously painful to me.

 

I wish I could move on, but I can't. I still look at his Facebook and Instagram profiles every day. I shop in the vicinity of his apartment, hoping to run into him on the street. I am afraid I turned into a stalker. Seeing his pictures on social media, in the arms of women at parties, I am hoping he finds happiness. His mother says that there is no hope of rekindling our relationship.

 

I should give up on him, but I can't.

 

This breakup happened in June 2015. It is now almost a year later. I have not been able to bring myself to hire another escort since then.